Warrior Heart

by Laura Kaighn

  “It is not important, Traveler. Eggs are now being prepared, free of disease in a sterile chamber with an immune queen. She will ensure our survival. You have given us reassurance that our children will prosper.” His quadruple orbs blinked, stalks sagging. “I am gratified.”

  “We are ready, High Chancellor,” the Arch controller announced.

  “Very good, Ttlckt.”

  “Wait, High Chancellor,” Vesarius interrupted from between his Mytoki carriers. “Your children. They have found a cure. You do not have to die.”

  The chancellor considered the Vesar cradled atop Mytoki foreclaws. “It is already too late for us, Tankawankanyi of the Vesar. We are products of our own pride. Our children’s resourcefulness shall serve as tribute to our memory. We do not need their saving. We refuse it.” Vesarius watched the chancellor’s eyestalks wilt in finality and sighed against the futile argument and his own exhaustion. The Mytoki leader straightened. “Since you are not of our carapace, Traveler, we must send you to another time and place. Where is home for you?”

  “My ship, Wise One. The Pompeii.” Vesarius felt his body sagging further in his attendants’ grip. The Vesar would welcome Dr. Sheradon’s pending ministries.

  “A space vessel is a moving target.” The high chancellor’s eyestalks twirled. Was it amusement? “We are not that gifted. You must pick a stable body with a predictable orbit. Would a star map be helpful?”

  “No, Wise One,” Vesarius said half-smiling. “I know where you can send me. As navigator on my ship, I have memorized the coordinates of many planets.”

  “Very good, Traveler. Please proceed.” Vesarius recited a series of numbers along three planes from Mytok’s own. He next provided a current star date. As the Arch controller tapped the information into the machine, Vesarius’ bearers gently stood him before the humming stone. One Mytoki handed him his pack, and Vesarius thanked them both with a stiff bow.

  “May you live in wisdom, Traveler,” the chancellor said. “I thank you for our children’s sake. We hope you find peace with them.”

  “Honors to you, High Chancellor and to all of Mytok.” Vesarius watched the Arch haze over blue, and he stepped through its opaqueness into a promising new future.

  * * *

  “Yolonda.” Coty called striding into the Pompeii’s medical center. “Yolonda?”

  Dr. Sheradon stepped out of her office, datapad in hand. A stylus poked from over her right ear. “Coty, you’re early for your appointment.”

  “I’m not here for my eye exam, Lonnie. I’m looking for Dorinda. We just got orders to return to Earth, and I thought she might like to know. Do you know where she is?”

  “Bear,” Sheradon started, her voice already growing offensive. “Have you even talked to her lately?”

  “What do you mean?” Coty closed his fists to the forthcoming conflict.

  “I wish you’d stop quoting duties and avoiding her. Because, if it’s about Vesarius, you’re wrong.” Yolonda frowned crossing her arms over the datapad tucked to her chest. “She doesn’t blame you for his death.” When Coty only blinked, Sheradon continued, “You can’t brush her off, Bear. She’s all our responsibility now. Dorinda’s lost two men in her life. All she has left is Noah and Tundra ... and you.”

  “Me?” Coty exclaimed. “You know I’m too old for her.”

  “That’s a sad excuse, Bear. Dorinda needs a friend. She’s doing just what she did after her husband died, isolating herself from people. It’s not healthy.”

  “Lonnie,” Coty defended, “what am I supposed to say? Sweet nothings? She doesn’t take that well.” The captain well-remembered Dorinda’s earlier reaction to his simple compliment.

  Yolonda shook her head. “No, Bear. Talk to her. Help her through this. Keep her from wrapping herself in a blanket of loneliness.”

  “But why me?” Coty snapped. He swung his arms at her in emphasis. “Why not you? She hasn’t exactly had her luck with men.”

  “Because, you need to talk about this just as much as she does.” Sheradon propped her fists on her hips and slanted her brunette head at him. “You’re blaming yourself, and that’s not healthy either.”

  “I know it’s not my fault,” Bear began with a shrug.

  “In your head, yes. But your heart’s searching for alternatives. What you could’ve done to save him. How you could’ve stopped him from going down there. Self-persecution, Bear, is self-destruction.” Sheradon’s eyes softened. “Go. Find Dori. Talk to her. Heal each other, and remember Vesarius together.”

  Coty sighed in resignation. He had to admit; Sheradon knew the crew better than they knew themselves. Coty guessed it was the sign of an exceptional physician. “Do you know where she is, Yolonda?”

  “She’s been spending a lot of time in the recreation facilities with Tundra and Noah,” Sheradon explained. “I think we’ll find her poolside.” She next grabbed Coty’s arm, escorting him toward the door. “Tundra’s bonded to her, by the way. I think it was Vesarius’ last wish or something.” The doctor steered Coty out of Medical and down the hall at a brisk stride.

  Shrugging off her grasp, the captain stammered his exasperation. “I know where the pool is, for Sule’s sake.” Within a score more paces, they were at the entrance to the Pompeii’s pool facilities. When the doors dutifully opened, Coty noticed the silence within. “I don’t think she’s in here.” They rounded the wall to the pool’s patio.

  Dorinda was there, stretched out on a chaise lounge on the far side of the water-filled basin. Near her feet lounged Tundra one forepaw absently paddling at the water’s edge. Noah was a sleek silhouette slipping along the bottom of the pool. Why did Coty get the sensation someone had died?

  “Talk to her,” Sheradon whispered in his ear and nudged him gently forward. With a pat to her captain’s shoulder, the doctor was gone. Coty’s glower shadowed her exit.

  Tundra’s head popped up at the sound of Coty’s footsteps on the patio deck. The malamute’s gray orbs tracked his approach; a slight tail wag was his welcome. In the pool, Noah surfaced and chirruped a greeting. Raising her still wet head, Dorinda’s jade eyes slid open. “Hello, Captain,” she acknowledged stoically. Her auburn hair snaked against bare shoulders. Coty noticed the woman’s slight frame had begun to fill out. Noah’s swimming lessons were paying off. Dorinda would soon be up to par with fleet standards. If she decided to stay, Coty reminded himself.

  “Dorinda,” Michael Bear replied cheerfully. “I have good news. We’re returning to Earth. Our orders may keep us there for a while if you want to visit.”

  Dorinda’s eyebrows tapered to a skeptical V. “Just who am I supposed to visit?”

  Coty sagged. “I’m sorry,” he instantly apologized. “I meant if you wanted to see Earth, see how it’s changed. I suppose you could look up some distant relatives too.” The Pompeii’s captain sat down on the end of her chaise lounge and continued, “But if you’d let me, I’d like to show you around New York City. It’s still a center for commerce and glitz. Earth Alliance’s central office is there. Maj. Gen. Chan and his staff will be awaiting a complete report, but I’ll have time to get you started on a tour. That is, if you’d like.”

  “All right, Michael. If you want to.” Her voice seemed as lifeless as their Vesar friend. Sheradon was right; Coty had been avoiding her for this very reason.

  Michael Bear cringed at Dorinda’s reaction. With a swallow, he also knew he had to do something about it. Coty was witnessing his own outlook reflected in Dorinda’s dour face. At least the captain had work to do. Jonas wanted a patent on his engine modifications. Moxland and Sam were postulating a Mytok history book. Robotic repairs were being finalized on the ship’s damaged hull-plating. Sheradon had stacks of crew physicals for him to review, and the crew database was overdue for an update. Dorinda only had time to sulk. Swallowing once more, Coty gathered his reservations.

  “Look, Dorinda,” he began decisively. “Yolonda’s got me here to talk to you about Vesarius. She said
it’d do us both some good. So, is there anything you want to ask me?” Coty pasted on his most compassionate, earnest expression.

  Dorinda frowned slightly adding to her already disagreeable facade. Sitting up straight in the chaise, her eyes drifted away from him. “I don’t know.” Noah splashed out of the pool and sauntered over to Dorinda’s side laying his dripping chin on the woman’s bare thigh. Absently she stroked the otter’s sleek head. Dorinda’s voice was velvet soft and as distant as her gaze when she finally continued, “There’re so many conflicting emotions swirling around in my heart. They’re like an anchor weighing me against this chair.”

  Michael understood those sentiments. He named them. “You mean the loneliness and guilt, the anguish and gloom? You feel weak and useless don’t you?”

  Dorinda’s emerald sight inched back to his face. “Yes.”

  Did Coty sense a slight emotional reaction there? He pressed on. “Dorinda, I feel the same way. I’ve lost a friend whom I’ve known and worked with closely for almost a decade. I’ve lost a brother ... And I’m blaming myself.”

  This time Dorinda’s scrutiny locked on his. Coty saw the compassion there. “It wasn’t your fault, Michael. You did what you did to save everyone ... at least for the time being.” Her gaze drifted away again focused on some inner scene.

  “That’s just the point now, isn’t it?” Coty argued. “I had to, but then Vesarius died for nothing. If he’d accomplished his goal and died, there’d no longer be a threat to the rest of us. He would’ve been a hero, honored even among his people.”

  Dorinda leaned toward him, her eyes crescents of pain. “Do we even know for sure, Michael?”

  Surprised at her question, Coty blinked. “Know what?”

  Dorinda’s expression changed, her gemlike eyes wide with concern. “How do we know that the Orthops didn’t agree with his story? We don’t know for sure if another Arch is being built. Maybe all the leader Orthops – those queenkeepers you spoke of – were killed, their knowledge along with them. Maybe the rest of the Orthops won’t know how to build an Arch.”

  Coty smiled slightly and patted her hand where it rested on her thigh. “I hope that’s true. But we have to be sure. We need to make it true.” Coty’s eyes focused inward as he added softly, “Soon we may be headed back into Orthop space, looking to either negotiate or destroy again.”

  Against this truth Dorinda grabbed his arm. “Please, Michael. No more killing.” Her fingernails dug into his sleeve. “I’m sick of killing. I just want to go home to my cottage in the Adirondacks.” With a deep exhale, her voice was calmer when she dropped her hand and eyes. “I want to see the mountains and the trees again. I want to hear the birds.”

  “All right,” Coty agreed. He perceived the concrete wall she had suddenly resurrected. “If that’s your decision. You and Noah can stay on Earth.” Coty felt the familiarity that had been growing between them dissipate like sunlit mist. “Is there anything else we can do for you, Ms. Tanner?” He really couldn’t blame Dorinda. She’d tumbled into a much more alien and violent life than her own history.

  Shrugging quickly at his question, Dorinda swung her legs past him and shoved herself out of the chair. Her entire frame was tense with emotion when she turned to face the captain. “I want to understand things,” Dorinda demanded pumping her fists, her frustration creasing her ivory complexion. “I feel so stupid. So out of place. Everything’s happened so fast ... It’s like ... I’m a victim of a hit and run driver.” Dorinda’s eyes constricted into half-moons of despair. “I just don’t know what to do.” Coty watched her shoulders slump in utter defeat. “I feel so ... useless.” Dorinda’s confession ended in a trembling whisper. “Lost.”

  Understanding her anguish, Michael promptly stood and gathered Dorinda into his arms. “Sssh,” he comforted even as he sensed her stubborn resistance to his embrace. Coty explained her worth. “Dori, the world still needs people like you, people who care so deeply that they’re willing to die for their convictions.” Coty pushed her away, gripping her damp shoulders so he could look her square in the face. “Please understand that I do care what happens to you. I want to help you find your place in this new time. No one is going to abandon you. You have friends here.” When Dorinda’s downcast expression lightened just a shade, Coty smiled. “I think we could both use a walk in the arboretum. There’s fresh air in there, space to think. We’ll wait for you here. Why don’t you go get dressed?” When Dorinda hesitated, Coty added, “Captain’s orders.”

  Dorinda trudged to the dressing rooms and in less than fifteen minutes was shuffling back to her Kin. She wore her ever-favorite blue jeans and flat black boots. An emerald boat neck tunic was tossed onto her shoulders, and she had hastily brushed her wet hair back leaving tendrils of bangs framing her forehead. “I’m ready, Michael.”

  “Come with me.” Coty gently cupped her elbow as escort. When they reached the arboretum on level four, the captain palmed the entrance and pressed her forward into the brightly lit room. “I’ll be right there,” he told her knowing where Dorinda’s feet would carry her. Flipping open the control panel on the wall beside the door, the captain reset the environment for partly cloudy conditions, warm with no rain.

  Dutifully, the artificial glare of the arboretum’s many grow-lamps switched to a random pattern of light and shadow, imitative of a sun occasionally obscured by clouds. Coty strode through the trees to a patch of grass that bordered the walled portal now open to the stars. There Dorinda sat cross-legged facing space. Her Kin’s heads rested one on each knee; her arms encircled their shoulders. The image was not unlike one Coty had witnessed before. Vesarius used to meditate in that very spot. The captain moved to stand beside her.

  “He’s out there, you know. Somewhere,” Coty mused eyeing the starfield. His voice was gravelly with regret. “The Vesar believe the soul is purged at death and flies free to join the ancestors among the stars.”

  “Then he’s with my husband,” Dorinda murmured her gaze upon the spectacle. “The Cherokee believe they rejoin their Creator in a more peaceful place. Just like Heaven.”

  Michael Bear joined her on the cool grass. “Dorinda. We need to talk about Vesarius. We need to understand our own feelings about him before we can both move on with our lives.”

  “You asked me,” Dorinda started quietly, “if I had any questions. I do.” Her faraway stare still embraced the stars.

  “All right,” Coty encouraged.

  “Was he like all Vesar? If I meet ... when I meet another, will he be like Vesarius?”

  “Well,” Coty began searching for the words, “it depends on what characteristic you’re referring to.”

  Dorinda pulled her sight from the stars and scooted her body to face the Pompeii’s captain. Coty noticed how her eyes were emerald fire in the artificial sunlight. “His humor.”

  In response the captain’s mouth spread into a broad smile. He rolled back to admit, “Oh, now that was a Tankawankanyi specialty. I think he got it from Sologin. Not many Vesar have a sense of humor, I’m afraid. What else?”

  “His bullheadedness.”

  “A Vesar standard,” Coty assured with a curt nod. “Though at times I think Vesarius even exceeded that.”

  Now Dorinda’s eyes rounded as if with a remembered touch. “Michael, what about his gentleness?” Absently her fingers traced the newly healed scar beneath her left sleeve.

  Michael Bear Coty hesitated before answering. What did she want him to tell her? He gathered his thoughts quickly. With an edge of embarrassment, the captain began, “Vesarius was a pillar of a man, obstinate and strong. This gentleness you found is something I’ve never witnessed.” With a grunt of irony Coty elaborated. “He was always brisk and brave, ready for action even when I didn’t want him to be. Vesarius would throw himself before plasma fire to cover Tundra’s or my escape. I think he prided himself in being gallantly indestructible.” Michael smirked. “I really think he enjoyed making me nervous with his stunts. And he wo
uld stoically sit and beam while Sheradon patched him up.” Coty waggled his head at the sullen stone in his heart. “I can’t believe he’s gone.”

  * * *

  Dorinda saw an abrupt barrenness to Coty’s dark gaze. She leaned forward to place her hand on his knee. The heartache she was experiencing was echoed in his slumped shoulders. “I’m sorry, Michael. Vesarius was special, a unique individual.”

  “Yes, like our Mark Twain or ...”

  “Henry David Thoreau,” Dorinda whispered her eyes glazing at the memory. “A kindred spirit.” Suddenly salty liquid obscured her view of the stars beyond the portal. Coty climbed to his boots. He hefted her from the grass-carpeted floor to embrace her. Dori smiled through silent tears to hug Coty back. Her sight drifted out into the darkness of space, transfixed by its bounty. “Be at peace, Sarius.”

  “We’ll remember him together,” Coty murmured stroking her hair then releasing her as Tundra stood and raised his muzzle to the ceiling.

  A mournful howl arose in the arboretum, and Dorinda shivered as Tundra’s cry echoed in her mind. When the malamute leaned against her leg, Dorinda knelt to embrace him. “It’s all right, boy. Vesarius didn’t want either of us to be alone, so we’re together.” She ruffled the dog’s mane affectionately. “I’ll take you to my beautiful Adirondacks. We’ll go tracking for moose.”

  “Do you really want to stay on Earth?” Coty asked standing over them.

  Dorinda finished hugging the malamute then straightened to consider his question, eyes now dry. “I love those woods, Michael. I miss them. I’ll take Noah and Tundra there and let you know of my decision when I know it. It all depends on how much of my life I can recover. My cottage might not exist anymore, the land no longer mine.” Dorinda glanced down at the dog beside her, patting his head. “We both need time to forget the sorrow. I believe a change of scenery may help.”