The Given Garden

by S. K Munt

  ‘Neither will being in this room today miss, which is likely to be the noisiest spot in the castle.’ Lindy glanced over her shoulder. ‘In fact, there’s a free guest room still. Maybe you should rest there.’

  ‘Yes! Get her out of here before she contaminates all of us!’ Elfin cried, making a beeline for the bathroom with a pastry in her hand.

  ‘Agreed,’ Elfin gave me a sour look. ‘You do look awful.’

  I closed my eyes so I wouldn’t roll them and sighed. ‘If that would make everyone feel better…’

  Evidently it did for within ten minutes, Maryah had me packed up and moved into a spare guest room.

  ‘Are you sure you won’t at least try to come downstairs?’ Lindy asked me as she tucked me into bed. ‘I know how much you’ve been missing Kohén and I’m sure he’s eager to see you.’

  ‘I don’t know if he is. But Lindy… if you see him and he asks about me, tell him where I am, okay? And that he’s welcome to pop by.’

  ‘Will do, darling, and I’ll tell Coaxley too.’ Lindy kissed my forehead and I closed my eyes as though exhaustion had claimed me at last. ‘Please rest and feel better. I will be devastated if that gown is wasted after how hard I worked on it, and this ball is going to be something spectacular, Lark. The king and duchess have all sorts of fun surprises to share!’

  My heart sank. I didn’t want to miss any fun, but that gown was the precise reason why I wanted to stay locked away. It was too much. I would look beautiful in it, but the other girls’ dresses weren’t half as detailed, and they’d think that I was trying to outshine them because they’d all already despaired that my pretty crystal shoes were lovelier than theirs.

  That wasn’t the case- I would have traded them their gowns for it in a heartbeat if I could, but I already knew that it wouldn’t fit anyone else. It was too long for Lette, Emmerly and Kelia but would be too short on Elfin, and the waist and bust-line wouldn’t sit right on anyone else, even if they had been the right height.

  No, my gown was perfect for only me, and Lindy had designed it that way to express her love for me. I felt wretched to know that I would let her down by staying in bed all evening, but if she truly loved me, she’d want me to remain invisible. The only reason why I wanted to go to the ball so badly was because finally, it was my chance to blend in! To dance and drink- to be normal. Not the belle of the ball, not the duckling and not the whore- just a girl who wanted to eat her best friend’s birthday cake at his side and apologize and maybe later, kiss him just so that I could moan truthfully and soothe the ruffled feathers of his ego.

  I was depressed to be missing it, but there would be other balls, and maybe when I was a little older and the future a little more certain, I’d wear my dazzling dress then. But tonight I would sit and wait for my friend to decide that he wanted to share his birthday cake with me too, even if it meant delivering it to my door.

  He would.

  He had to.

  *

  I went stir crazy in the guest room that day, and alternated between pacing the floors, listening through the wall to hear if the other girls mentioned me and jumping every time I heard footsteps coming before flying back to the bed and lying prone in wait.

  But no one came for me. Kohén didn’t stop by, Kelia didn’t bother to check on me and by the sounds of it, Lindy was too run off her feet doing last minute alterations on the other Given gowns that she had made to have a chance to check on me. I was bored, lonely and anxious and by the time that the sun had begun to sink over the sight of the gazebo on the common dotted with fairy lights- which was an actual Nephilim illusion- I felt desperate.

  I knew that Kohén had to be busy of course- he’d probably needed to rest and catch up with his family and get ready and all of that, but surely he could have found at least five minutes to call on his old friend, right? The realisation that I was either on the cusp of losing him or had lost him already made me feel frail everywhere that I usually felt strong, but though I longed to fall asleep and stay that way, I could not. For starters, the preparations for the ball were noisy and secondly, every time I closed my eyes I saw Karol’s leer and so fear would make them fly open again. I could lose Kohén’s favour but NOT his loyalty!

  At around three I realised that I was never going to fall asleep and that I was wasting the beautiful guest room by climbing the walls, so I went into the en-suite and ran myself a big sudsy bath. We had nice facilities in our room too, but the guests were given fancy soaps that smelled divine, the bath was twice the size of the one in our dormer and for the first time in eleven years, I wouldn’t be rushed in and out by some impatient girl who needed to use the bathroom too. So I locked the door and soaked, taking care to wash my hair and then brush my teeth with a brand new toothbrush, toothpaste that was flavoured like cupcakes (delicious!) and then took the time to actually blow dry my hair with a brush, which I’d been meaning to do for weeks.

  When I was dry I fastened my hair into a loose, casual-looking braid that wouldn’t look suspiciously overdone and then, deciding that I didn’t want to look like absolute hell if Kohén did stop by, used the complimentary mineral make up palette to give myself some colour, which was little more than a matte powder in a sweet bronze shade, a bit of mascara and a touch of cranberry lip gloss. When I was done, I looked strange, but that wasn’t just because of the make up (or the fact that I had to change back into my sweaty pyjamas) but because I’d been forced to visit the stylist earlier that week to get ready for the ball and she’d tinted and plucked my eyebrows and then darkened my lashes so that I had been practically unrecognizable to myself since. So with the make up on as well I looked downright alien and I wasn’t sure if I’d even applied the powder right because I’d never worn it before. I grimaced and turned away from the stranger in the mirror and let myself back into the main room where I sat on the edge of the bed and waited, occasionally lifting my sleeve to smell under my armpit to make sure that I didn’t reek from the old clothes, but all I smelled was strawberries.

  Come on Kohén, come on! God! Satan! One of you can hear me right?! First one to respond gets my undying devotion!

  But though doors continued to open and close up and down the corridor, no one knocked on mine and when I heard the giggles and whispers of my dorm mates in the hall, my curiosity overshadowed my need to play dead. I snatched the sheet off the bed and wrapped it around myself, tucked my hair up in a turban so it would look like I’d just gotten out of the shower and was going back to bed and then hurried to unlock my door. When I did, the sight of Lette posed for a photograph in the corridor across from me stole my breath, for she looked more beautiful than the duchess ever had.

  ‘Oh… Lette!’ I breathed, and she turned, and maintaining her pose as the cameraman flashed away, grinned at me.

  ‘Yeah?’

  ‘Absolutely yeah! Wow!’ I ventured into the hallway, so excited for her that I could have squealed. She’d always been the darkest and most petite of us all, and I’d never liked the way she cut her hair to glide along the line of her jaw but tonight, it was perfectly right. Lindy had made her a lovely dress that would have looked perfect in AD China, with a high Mandarin collar, capped sleeves and a form-fitting skirt, only instead of making it from heavy brocade, Lindy had made it from the ice-coloured chiffon that would have been completely transparent if not for the fact that Lette was wearing an ivory silk bandeau and skirt beneath it, which covered her breasts and hips. The illusion of her limbs, neck and throat being bare was there and made her look taller, especially in her white slip-on heels, but the shimmering fabric maintained her modesty and innocence while hugging her dancer’s frame just enough to make the look sensual.

  And for all of her talk about needing hours with her hair, Lette had only had the top rear section pulled up, twisted and speared with silver chopsticks, which perfectly matched the silver balls dangling from her ears along with glossy sections from her bangs. Her make up was more elaborate- silver powder accentuated the almond shape of
her eyes and swirls of mint green and silver leaves ran from her temple and down her throat until it vanished under the chiffon, but it was perfect too and I hoped that she’d thanked Elfin profusely for that, who could have gone too far on purpose. But Lette looked exotic and grown up and not a bit like the plainest of them all.

  I was about to say something else but then Elfin hurried out and my jaw dropped. I’d known that her dress would be sleek and sexy because I’d seen it in its narrow garment box, but seeing it on her long graceful frame took it to a whole other level. Her dress was little more than an ivory slip, which managed to show off her narrow frame without being plastered to her. It had simple spaghetti straps and straight lines all the way to her upper thighs, when it suddenly split open to reveal one leg, while the rest flared out to a mermaid tail to her ankles. The satin was simple and liquid, and the bronzed leg showing through the split fatally sexy, and her satin-covered platforms were the perfect touch. She looked like she was as tall as a week, as narrow as a second, and as refined as the most timeless beauties can only ever look. In fact, she reminded me of a picture I’d once seen of some Hollywood starlet from the time before. She had no cleavage, but her dress was open to her tailbone and her exposed shoulder blades looked twice as feminine as the most pushed up breasts could have.

  Elfin’s dark, sun-streaked hair was way more involved than Lette’s though, and compensated for the simple lines of her dress. It had been fixed into a french roll to show off her swanlike neck only instead of the hair being smoothed into that shape, it had been braided hundreds of times, with white diamantés lined in the parts between braids and then dotted over the roll- making her scalp shimmer where mine would have looked red and tight from such a severe hairdo. It was amazing: art, not just hair.

  Her make up was simple at first glance too- she’d been dusted with a very pale powder with just the faintest rosy hue dabbed on her cheeks, and then had added translucent, gleaming lip gloss and a touch of mascara, but when she turned to adjust the split in her dress, I saw that instead of painting her face, she’d glued on a series of diamantés in a swirling pattern which extended from the main side part of her hair down to sparkle prettily on her jaw bone on one side. She looked frostbitten in the vey best way.

  ‘Elfin!’ I exclaimed. ‘You look like you belong on some red carpet or something!

  ‘A red carpet on a spaceship,’ Lette supplied, grinning at her.

  ‘In a freezing climate.’ Elfin looked up at me and smiled, smoothing her dress. ‘But it’s amazing, isn’t it?’

  ‘Both of your dresses are. Both of you are. I can’t get over it…’ I stepped back and hushed when the camera man motioned for Elfin to get into the picture, and then asked Lette to step aside so that he could get a few of Elfin by herself too. And while he was doing that, a third head popped into the corridor and suddenly, I was staring at Kelia with a racing heart.

  ‘Oh!’ I cupped my mouth and felt my eyes water. Not just because they all looked so beautiful, but also because I was sad. Sad that we weren’t all close. Sad that they were packaged products. Sad that Martya wasn’t here and that they didn’t know she was dead and possibly, wouldn’t care if they did. Sad that I couldn’t let go of my stupid dreams and share these few moments of joy with them in our paradise.

  Sad because I saw that Kohén was probably going to take one look at Kelia and fall madly in love with her.

  26.

  Lindy had themed the gowns, not just in virginal shades of white, but by era- era from the times past. No one dressed the way the girls were dressed now, but they had once and I recognised it from one of Maryah’s books about twentieth century beauty. Lette was exotic and turn of the century Asianan, Elfin was the nineteen twenties, and Kelia was the fifties, or possibly sixties I couldn’t remember.

  She wore a frost-white dress with a fitted, heart-shaped bodice and tapered waist, which flared into a full skirt that must have had at least three petticoats beneath it to make it stick out the way it did. The skirt ended somewhere between her knees and ankles and her delicate white kitten heels made her slender legs look shapelier than I’d ever seen them before, just as the frothy petticoats beneath it made her skin look more tanned than it was. Her hair was up off her face for the first time ever and fluffed up into a thick, bouncy ponytail of perfect copper-coloured coils, adorned with a simple white bow at the base, and a string of pure white pearls matched the tiny white studs in her ears. She looked bright, sprite and bubbly, and I could tell that she felt it too because she was moving with confidence and excitement.

  Her make up was extreme for Kelia, but not decorative like the other two. No she had opted for a plain base, no decorations but had lined her eyes so that they popped before enhancing the shape of her pretty mouth with fire-red lipstick. Classic. Adult. Perfect. Heartbreakingly beautiful and almost angelic.

  I could have cried.

  Lindy had outdone herself, and I’d been wrong to assume that I would stand out compared to the others, who looked the best possible versions of themselves. Kelia wasn’t a curvy girl by nature, but the dress gave her shape, and Elfin was anything but refined and yet her gown made her look modest and effortlessly sensual when in life, she was the loudest and crassest of us all. And Lette had been plain and unremarkable but as I swept my gaze along the line and landed on her I realised that Lindy had made her the fairest of them all and definitely the most tempting-looking. She had a small waist like me, only her skin was darker and her abdomen could have given what I remembered of Kohén’s a run for his money, while the rest of her looked delicate. We were used to Elfin and Kelia standing out but tonight, Kohén would probably see Lette for the first time in a whole new way. She had the most obvious Mexican genetics of all of us but tonight she looked oriental, exotic and strong.

  She looked like a Geisha and really, that was what she was. Watching them shuffle about in front of the cameraman made me feel spiritually devoid. They should be posing for graduations and marriage portraits, not as sale items!

  ‘Okay one more of the one with the swing dress…’ the cameraman said, and then his camera flashed. ‘And that’s it! Beautiful girls, thank you.’

  ‘You’re welcome,’ the girls chimed, and Kelia came over and ran her hand down my hair, frowning deeply.

  ‘Oh Larkin, I can’t believe you’re going to miss this! Do you feel that awful? Really?’ She peered at me. ‘You look perfectly healthy. Except for the hair and um… sheet.’

  ‘I’m a little better now that I’ve had a sleep, but it’s too late,’ I said sadly. ‘It would take me two years to look as lovely as you girls do, and the supper has already started.’

  ‘I do look sensational,’ Elfin said, taking Kelia’s wrist and tugging her back. ‘And I know that even you would have felt pretty tonight too, Larkin, but there will be other balls, I suppose. I mean, we’re old enough to go to them all now!’

  Only this is the only time we’ll be able to go in a gown, not a toga, for who knows how long? Oh well!

  ‘Exactly,’ I said, and then saw Coaxley appear at the end of the hall and beckon to them.

  ‘Girls? It’s time to take you down.’ He gave me a wave and a sad smile. ‘Good evening Larkin. Feeling any better yet?’

  ‘A little,’ I said, hating myself for lying to my friends. I stepped back and motioned Kelia forward. ‘And I’ll feel much better if you bring me back all of the gossip okay? So get on down there and show Arcadia just what a third-born child is worth!’

  ‘I will,’ Kelia vowed, pouting at me one more time before turning away.

  ‘And behave yourselves!’ Lindy reprimanded them. ‘It’s not often that a Given girl under the age of sixteen is permitted to attend such a fancy ball girls, so mind your manners and remember your training because one slip-up could see you sent back here.’

  ‘We know… we know…’ Elfin rolled her eyes. ‘No flirting, no asking men to dance, no shadowing Kohén, no rude language, no approaching members of the nobility, no colo
ur, no drunkenness-’

  ‘No going on and on and on…’ Kelia said, laughing and pulling her back.

  ‘And I’ll wish Kohén a happy birthday for you,’ Lette chimed in, waving to me over her shoulder as she backed into the landing.

  ‘If Emmerly gives any of us the chance to,’ Elfin hissed, then giggled. Kelia looked back at me one more time but then they were around the corner and gone from sight.

  If Emmerly gives any of us a chance… the words repeated first in my mind, and then in my heart and finally in my gut. Yes, Emmerly probably would take Kohén to bed tonight, wouldn’t she? The thought was enough to make me feel sick for real.

  ‘Do you know that not one of them said thank you for their dresses?’ Lindy suddenly asked, and I turned and saw through the open door that she had collapsed in one of our dresser chairs and was fanning her red and flushed face. ‘Not one of them. Not even little Kelia, who I always thought would be such a sweetheart…’

  ‘I’m sorry,’ I said, stepping into the room and grimacing to see the state it was in. I immediately dropped the sheet and began to stack curlers into their box, and then moved to pick up the discarded undergarments on the floor. They were all clean by the look of it, and I recognised most so I stuffed them into their correct drawers and then got to work picking up shoeboxes. They were everywhere! We’d all received new shoes as a gift, along with the dresses, and I couldn’t believe that the girls would show their gratitude by making more of a mess for poor Lindy to clean up. She was six months pregnant and had been sweating up here all day! ‘Your designs were spectacular and nothing short of that. I’ll bet they’ll be asked who made them all evening-’

  ‘And they’ll say: ‘My maid,’ Lindy finished for me.

  ‘I’ll kill them if they don’t name you,’ I returned, scooping up all of Elfin’s make up in one arm and sweeping it back into her top drawer.