Unbearable Failure

by ML Guida

She shook her head. “I’m still wrapping my mind around dragon-shifters. Wait, there are other shifters besides bears and dragons, aren’t there?”

  “Of course. Lions, wolves, tigers.”

  “I just can’t believe we didn’t know about all of these alien lifeforms.”

  He raised his eyebrow. “Alien lifeforms?”

  “Sorry. The wrong thing to say. By the way, where are we going?”

  “I thought you’d like to see the medical and science labs.”

  “Yes, I do. So, none of the women onboard the ship are ill?”

  “No. Why?”

  She looked at him, her eyes serious. “Are you sure?” She frowned. “Have you tested them?”

  “Well, no, but none of them were on Aria.”

  “I’m not convinced. That’s the first business of the day.” She whirled around, catching him off guard.

  He tripped over his shoes and fell into the wall, slamming his shoulder. “Sandra?”

  “Shut up.” She stabbed her finger into his chest. “If I find this cure, then I want your word––” she gritted her teeth––“you’ll return me to Earth.”

  He sucked in his breath. “Yes.” Guilt drove a wedge in his heart.

  “You promise?”

  “I promise.” The words tasted bitter on his lying lips. He desperately wanted to tell her the truth, but if he told her, she might refuse to reveal the formula. The Czar was out of his mind with grief and who knows what he would do.

  She motioned with her arm. “Fine, then let’s get started.”

  He rubbed his throbbing shoulder. “The elevator is up ahead.”

  They walked in silence. He couldn’t live with his guilt that was ripping his insides apart. He was about to tell her the truth when his telicator buzzed.

  “Vaughn, here.”

  “This is the Admiral.” Vaughn rolled his eyes. Why couldn’t he just say Dad? Ever since Dad made admiral, ceremony was everything. He’d changed.

  “Yes, Admiral.”

  “I want a report on your mate. Now.”

  Vaughn winced. “She’s awake and we are heading for the science lab.”

  Sandra stopped in her tracks. “Did he just say mate?”

  Heat rushed over his ears and down his neck. “Vaughn, out.” He stuffed the telicator into his belt. “Yes.”

  “So, you just lied to me?” She shoved him in the chest.

  “No, I mean.”

  She folded her arms across her chest. “You mean what?”

  “I was going to tell you.” He ran his hand through his hair.

  “No, you weren’t. Who is this Admiral?”

  “He’s my father,” he grumbled.

  “Your father? You two don’t get along?”

  “Just like you and your stepdad.”

  She held up her palm. “That’s totally different.” Her eyebrows furrowed. “I thought Tash was the captain of this ship. Or was that an assumption?”

  “No, Tash is the captain of the Intrepid. Our Czar insisted that my Dad come along on this mission.”

  Vaughn couldn’t help but wonder if there was another reason for his dad being here. Since he’d been Admiral, he considered being a captain commanding a ship was beneath him. So, why the sudden change?

  “You have a Czar?”

  “He’s the ruler of our people. The Czarina is dying, and he’s losing his mind.” He put his hands gently on Sandra’s stiff shoulders. “Listen to me. You don’t want to cross him or my dad. The Czar will do anything to save his Nonna, and my dad will do anything to promote his career.”

  “Meaning?”

  He dropped his hands. “You don’t want to find out.”

  She narrowed her eyes. “Are you threatening me?”

  “No, I’m trying to protect you.”

  She held up one palm. “First, I want the truth. What does it mean to be mated?”

  Boom-boom-boom. Boom-boom. Boom-boom-boom. Boom-boom-boom-boom.

  His steady heartbeat shifted into unsteady turbulence. Her words pushed the panic button of uneasiness that pulsed through his sweating body. Crewmen were walking around them, eyeing them curiously. Some of them were talking in hushed whispers. All were loyal to the Czar and would contact his dad if they thought the Czar was being betrayed. He leaned closer and lowered his voice. “This isn’t the place––”

  She tilted her chin. “I’m not moving until you tell me.”

  He clasped her arm and moved her away from the nosey traffic.

  “Listen, I knew you were my mate the minute I met you.”

  She frowned. “You mean in the hospital in Frisco?”

  “Yes.” He gently lifted her wrist and brushed his thumb over the green star imprinted on her wrist. “You have the mark of my people. The Arian Gods–the Shades–marked you.”

  “On my wrist?”

  He nodded. “Yes. When I met you, a green aura fluttered around you in the hospital room. Stars moved around you.”

  “Are you saying I have a green star tattooed on my wrist?”

  “Yes.”

  “But you left me. Why?” Her accusatory voice piled on the guilt.

  “It’s complicated.” He immediately regretted his stupid response.

  Hurt and anger flashed in her eyes. Her cheeks flamed red.

  The skin across his chest tightened and pain pulsed in the back of his tense throat. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her and that’s all he’d been doing.

  She jerked her wrist free. “Just take me to the damn lab.”

  “Sandra, wait.”

  She brushed past him like a wild bear. He leapt in front of her, forcing her to stop.

  “Will you listen?”

  “What?”

  “You need to know why.”

  “Don’t worry. I get it. I’m the geeky girl no one wants.” Her voice cracked.

  “You’re serious?”

  She turned her head and folded her arms across her chest.

  “You’re all I’ve ever dreamed about.”

  She sniffed. “Really?”

  He gently clasped her quivering chin and turned her so she’d have to look at him. “Absolutely.” He stared at her parted lips and fought the urge not to kiss her. “I am on a quest.”

  She blinked. “A quest?”

  He brushed his thumb over her cheek. “When you were at that hospital, did Walfea or his mate tell you what happened on the planet Sutois?”

  “Not really. I know that Walfea’s brother died.”

  He dropped his hand. “He was eaten.”

  She gasped and put her hand over her mouth. “Eaten?”

  The memory of that planet––the screams, the smells, the sounds––pumped fear and anxiety through him. Every muscle seized up. “We had a traitor on board the Intrepid and he sabotaged the ship. We landed on Sutois and he lured our people to the Gogs, who had a palate for bear-meat.” Bitterness, resentment, and anger choked his shaking voice.

  “Oh, Vaughn, how horrible.” She clasped his arm and rubbed it. Her warming touch eased the tension in his strained muscles and his clenched jaw relaxed.

  He took a deep breath. “It’s worse than you can imagine. But the traitor–Nucl–he said the reason why he did this was because of my dad.”

  Her brows knotted. “I don’t understand.”

  “My dad was a captain in the Confederation like Tash. Nucl claimed that my dad abandoned his crew on that planet to save his own skin.”

  “And you believe him?” Her voice softened.

  “No, but…”

  She cocked her head. “You’re not sure.”

  “I just need to know for sure. That’s why I didn’t claim you. This is killing me. My dad has always been my hero, and I can’t stand this hanging over his head. But after that mission he’d changed.”

  “So, it bothered him?”

  “I think so.”

  “He doesn’t know you’re investigating this, does he?”

  “No.” He rubbed his forehead.
“It’s tearing me and Tash apart. He’s about to beat me to a pulp.”

  “Your family sounds as messy as mine.”

  He smirked. “Maybe that’s why the Shades thought we should be mated.”

  She put her hands on his arms. “Maybe.” She parted her lips. “I’ve never kissed an alien.”

  “Neither have I.” He leaned over to kiss her, his lips brushing over hers.

  Tingles fired him through him, unleashing his pent-up desire. He deepened his kiss and crushed her to his hardened body. Blood pumped to his throbbing cock. The ancient instincts kicked in with a roar, demanding he claim her.

  Here and now.

  His telicator buzzed.

  She jumped back and put her hands on her chest. “Oh, God.”

  “Sorry.” He answered it, ready to rip Krup’s head off. “What Krup?”

  “This is Tash,” his brother growled.

  Vaughn groaned.

  “Where the Shades are you? The Admiral and I are waiting for you and Sandra in the science lab.”

  “Tell him we’re coming.” Sandra lowered her hands and coldness gripped him where warmth had been.

  “We’re on our way.” He didn’t wait for Tash to respond and shut off the telicator.

  What was wrong with him? Sandra’s lips were bruised and her face was flushed. He never lost control, but just seconds ago, he nearly took her in the corridor. Discipline––he needed to call on his military training.

  Think of nothing else except for the mission.

  But he was losing the battle.

  He put his shaking hand on the curve of her back and shoved the mating drive to the outskirts of his mind. He broke into a hot sweat and could barely breathe. His body trembled with passion, but he moved his feet one step at a time, focusing on the elevator. His bear snarled with frustration.

  Stay calm. Stay calm.

  But his nerves bundled into tight knots. Touching her lips had fueled his denied desire, and kissing definitely wasn’t enough. Not nearly enough.

  Chapter 4

  Sandra followed Vaughn, still reeling from his out-of-this-world kiss that opened up feelings she kept under a lock and key. Her breath was short and her heart shook. What was happening? Usually she tensed up when men kissed her, but not with Vaughn. She wanted more, so much more. Was this due to the mating drive?

  Stop. The kiss ended. Get over it. You’ve a job to do. Grandpappy’s life depends on it.

  Vaughn led her into a sleek hallway with octagon ceilings that reminded her something right out of a space movie. She kept expecting to run into a Vulcan or a Klingon or a Romulan. As she and Vaughn approached, the walls opened magically.

  She gasped and put her shaking hand on her chest. “This is so strange.”

  Vaughn smiled. “Computer, medical lab.”

  The all-glass elevator swooshed.

  “No buttons?” She lifted her eyebrow. “It’s voice activated?”

  “Yes.”

  “So, I could activate it?”

  He shook his head. “No. The ship only responds to Arians or their mates.”

  She glanced at her wrist. “How come I can’t see this supposed green star?”

  He stiffened. “It’s there. Humans don’t see the mark until they have mated with us.”

  “Mated?”

  He flashed her a flirtatious smile. “Sex.”

  Heat flushed down her cheeks, down her throat, and all the way down to her squirming toes. She broke out in a sticky sweat that sucked up her breath. She refused to look at him. Thanks to Oscar, sex always came hard for her. It wasn’t something she did easily and whenever she tried with men, she was stiff as a board.

  She cleared her throat. “That’s animalistic.”

  He shrugged. “Maybe for humans, but not for us. We’re bears.”

  The word ‘mates’ and everything it stood for stirred up nightmares from her childhood––the bedroom door sliding open, light creeping into the darkness, and heavy footsteps shuffling to her bed.

  Her small voice echoing in her mind go away, go away, go away.

  The sheets pulled high over her head, her eyes squeezed shut, and the horrible weight sinking onto her mattress.

  The elevator walls and Vaughn’s wide shoulders closed in on her. The air got hotter. She wrapped her arms around her waist like a shield, pushing her large breasts down. She had to get out.

  Escapeescapeescape

  The doors opened. Sandra bolted out of the elevator as fast as she could. Blurs of white, blue, and brown blurred.

  She bumped into someone.

  “Hey,” a feminine voice growled.

  Her heart jumped back ten feet and she stumbled. She blinked. “Oops. Sorry.”

  A group of women glared.

  Vaughn immediately caught up with her and grabbed her arm. “Sandra, where are you going?”

  She pushed her bangs out of her eyes. “I don’t know.”

  “You leapt out of there as if a Gog were chasing you.” He gestured with his arm. “The lab’s this way.”

  She nodded. “Okay.” Her quiet voice was a little shaky. What was she thinking? She eyed the women nervously. They were at least six inches taller than her and looked like they all competed in body building. They could easily rip her apart.

  He put his hand on her lower back and guided her down the corridor. “I better warn you. Neither my dad nor Tash are patient. They’ll want the formula.”

  “Rushing science is never a good idea.”

  “You know that. And I know that. But they won’t.”

  She was about to make another retort when a door slid open again as if by magic. Her mouth dropped open. She’d stepped into a world every scientist dreamed of. Microscopes, centrifuges, shakers and mixers of every size, thermal cyclers, universal testing machines, incubators, bioreactors, and equipment she couldn’t even begin to name, stole her breath.

  “This is the science lab.” Vaughn gestured with his arm. “On the other side of the north wall is sickbay.”

  “I’ve never seen anything like this.” Giddiness streaked through Sandra like lightning.

  “This is your mate?” A gruff voice snapped her out of her delirium.

  The childhood memories choked her throat and she couldn’t talk.

  Stay calm.

  She hadn’t even noticed Tash and an older man that was a carbon copy of him with his muscular body and the same chiseled chin except that his thick brown hair had a touch of gray. Two men and one woman wearing white lab coats stood behind them.

  A vein in Vaughn’s cheek quivered and he gritted his teeth. “This is Sandra Rotella.” He put his hand on her lower back and escorted her to the two men.

  She didn’t have to ask who the man was––Vaughn’s dad.

  “Sandra.” Vaughn gestured with his hand. “You remember my brother Tash––the captain of the Intrepid and my dad––Admiral Finbar.”

  The Admiral cast Vaughn a cold look. “On this mission, I am in charge of this ship. And you’ll address me as Admiral, not dad.” His arrogance reminded her of Oscar.

  Tash looked away and Vaughn sucked in his breath.

  “Now, Sandra–”

  Sandra stood taller. “Dr. Rotella.”

  He raised his eyebrow. “Fine. Dr. Rotella, I assume that Vaughn has told you of our predicament.”

  “Yes, he has.”

  “Then, you will hand over the formula.”

  “No, I won’t.”

  The men and woman gasped and whispered to each other. Heat torched her cheeks. Sandra couldn’t hear what they were saying, but by their scowls and shaking heads, whatever it was, it wasn’t good.

  Finbar glared. “I will have you thrown in the brig.”

  “Fine. I can stay there all day. How long does your Czarina have?” She tilted her head toward Vaughn. “From what I’m told she doesn’t have much time.”

  Finbar’s face turned five different shades of purple and red. Sandra was through with being intimidated by ov
er-important men. Ignoring the fear prickling her spine, she waited patiently.

  He gritted his teeth. “Pray do tell, why you won’t give us the formula?”

  “Because it’s not perfected. Like I told both Vaughn and Tash, I won’t administer the formula until I know it’s safe for both humans and Arians. You wouldn’t want your Czarina to be administered a medicine that would cause her to die, would you?”

  “No, I wouldn’t, but––”

  She met his hostile stare despite her racing heart pressing against her ribs. “Then, I suggest Admiral, that you allow the scientists do their work and not interfere, so we can discover the cure.”

  “I suggest you get to work, because if the Czarina dies, the Czar will rip you apart.” He turned on his heels. “Tash.”

  He didn’t even glance over his shoulder to see if Tash trailed him like a good lap dog.

  “I hope you know what you’re doing,” Tash grumbled as he followed his dad out of the lab.

  Vaughn ran his hand through his hair. “Shades, Sandra.”

  “What?”

  “Not many people have ever stood up to my dad.”

  She blinked. “Really?”

  He glanced nervously at the Arians watching them. “No. He’s a legend around here.”

  “Legend isn’t what I would call him.” She hoped her voice was low enough that the lab-coats hadn’t overheard.

  She frowned. “I thought your dad was your hero.”

  “He was. He is. It just…sometimes we don’t see eye-to-eye.” He cleared his throat. “We need to get to started. Let me introduce you to the crew.” He motioned and the two men and the one woman approached. “This is Marc, our ship’s doctor.”

  Marc was older and had blond hair that was turning white. He was slender compared to Vaughn’s brother and father. He looked at Sandra suspiciously. Obviously, he was loyal to the Admiral.

  “Marc, this is Sandra. She’s from Earth and––”

  “I know who she is and why she’s here.” He folded his arms across his chest. “With your stubbornness, you could be killing our women.”

  “Marc.” The dark-haired woman shook her head. Her long hair that shimmered in the light. “She said why she wasn’t sharing the formula.” She held out her hand and smiled. “I’m Ivona. I’m the nurse that will be assisting you.”

  Sandra shook her hand––finally an ally on this ship. “Hi Ivona.”