Tim sat up, and that warm expression morphed into something icy cold. “See, that’s what I don’t understand. Why did she come to you? I’ve been wanting to ask, but I wasn’t sure I wanted the answer.”
“She said you needed me and that I had to come back for you.”
His jaw clenched, and his hand tightened around the can. “So, what? She sacrificed herself to get to you? Why? I mean, you were gone, right? What the hell difference did it make if you came back?”
The anger in his eyes had me scooting back. They were so dark and a tremor of fear ran through me. “Maybe I should stay with my mom.”
“Oh no. You’re not getting out that easily.”
He leaped up, put his can on the table, turned, and grabbed me by the front of my shirt, hauling me off the couch. He fisted the fabric in his hand, then marched me backward to the wall. When I ran out of room, he crowded in near me, his face pressed in close to mine.
“You know, I never realized what an asshole you are. I guess I should have the day you walked out of our lives, but to be honest, I never really paid attention to that. All I saw was my friend, and I took him warts and all. But you being gone has given me a new perspective. Now I remember every fucked-up thing you did or said. And I find myself wondering why I thought you were my best friend.”
I swallowed back the sob that wanted to escape. If I was going to lose my best friend—the man I had loved almost my whole life—then I was going to do my damnedest not to cry.
“Did you know I had plans before you left? I wanted to make my mark in the world, wanted money to have nice things, to make a fucking home. Then you just up and vanished, and that came to a screeching halt. For eight months I refused to leave the house, because any minute I expected the call that they’d found you and we needed to identify your body. I wasn’t about to let your mom and Ryan go alone. I had to know for myself. But that call? Never came. And it’s because you fucking didn’t give a damn what you did to us.”
“I did.” My reply was weak and pathetic, even to my ears.
“No, you didn’t. A good friend—a good man—would have called to let us know he was okay. If you had done that, we could have moved on with our lives, without the whole what-if scenario hanging over us.”
He pressed in a little harder and glared at me.
“What if he died? What if they never found his body? What if we go somewhere and he calls for help? Those and a million more things went through my head every fucking day. I couldn’t even date because the thought that I was supposed to go out and have a good time while you might be buried in the cold ground made me nauseous.”
“I’m—”
He shoved me once more, and I slammed against the wall hard enough that the photos on it rattled. “Don’t you fucking dare say you’re sorry! I am so goddamn sick of those words from your mouth. You waltz back into our lives and think we should all bow down to you because you were gracious enough to come home. You act as though we’re not entitled to be angry or hurt. Yeah, I get it, you’ve got a shitty life, and in your shoes, I can’t say what I would have done, but I hope to hell it wouldn’t be to scare my family to death.”
There was nothing I could say. He was right. Ever since I’d stepped off the train, I had expected that people would be upset but that they’d welcome me back.
“You know, before you disappeared, I had this idea—more a dream, really—where I’d ask you to go out to dinner with me. I’d take you to a nice restaurant, and we’d sit and enjoy each other’s company. I even went so far as to make reservations at c.1880, a newer place in Milwaukee. Then you were just… gone. It was like you never existed. I scoured the area, trying to think where you might go, and every time I didn’t find you, I came home and cried. Mom was a rock. She comforted me, told me that I needed to have faith you’d find your way back and that I needed to do whatever I could to ensure that happened. So, I answered every question the cops asked, because I didn’t want to hold anything back that might help us find you. In the end, none of it did one fucking bit of good.”
He jerked his arm away, and as weird as it sounded, I missed the contact.
“I know what you’re thinking now. Why would he want to go with me to dinner? Well, confession time. After a lot of prodding by my mom, I was going to come clean to you. She said I shouldn’t hold a secret, but then, I guess I wasn’t the only one doing that, was I?”
He sounded so bitter and his posture was so tense, I was afraid to move.
“In my dream, we’d go and sit. We were too young for a bottle of wine, so we were going to have soda, and an elegant dinner. Then, after, I was going to tell you….” He drew in a deep breath. “Tell you I… I loved you.”
Loved me? A thousand thoughts flitted through my head, but the one thing that kept coming back was that he said he loved me.
“Of course, over five years, that changed. It made me angrier, more resentful. You know the old saying that there is a fine line between love and hate? I crossed it so many times, if I’m honest, I’m not sure what I feel anymore.”
As soon as those words were out of his mouth, he lurched toward me, pinning me once more. He stared in my eyes for a moment, then slammed our mouths together, biting and sucking on my lips. I stood there, too shocked to say or do anything, as he took control, guiding the kiss. When he drew back, his eyes were glassy.
“If you want me to stop, you have to say so now. I won’t force you to do anything you don’t want.”
My breath quickened. This was fantasy come to life. “Don’t stop.”
He smiled, then grabbed my hand and dragged me back toward the couch. Once we were there, he pushed me down, then yanked my shirt up over my head and threw it to the floor. His hands, warm and rough, roamed over my skin, kneading and pulling.
I’d dreamed of this. I wanted Tim. He leaned in and put his face in the crook of my neck, sucking harshly on the skin, pulling up what would no doubt be an enormous hickey. The thought of him marking me had me rock-hard and straining, trying to make him touch me. I squirmed, needing to bring our bodies together.
“Stand still or I stop! You had your way for five years, and now it’s my turn.”
I whimpered but stilled all movement.
He latched deft fingers onto my nipple and gave it a sharp tug, eliciting a hiss from me and a deep chuckle from Tim. “When we were kids and we’d go swimming, I’d love how your nipples perked up. They’d tempt me and become part of my fantasies. I wanted them in my mouth, where I could bite them and suck them, where—”
I grabbed his hair and mashed his face against my chest. “You talk too much.”
He gave a wicked chuckle and sank his teeth into the nub, causing me to cry out. He ran his long fingers down my chest, then rubbed my ribs, gently stroking each one. My goose bumps had goose bumps. No one had ever made me feel like this.
My cock ached from pressing against the fabric of my pants. I reached down to release it from the denim prison, when his hands smacked mine.
“Told you, stay still. You always did have a problem following instructions.”
He slid his fingers along the extended flesh, pulling yet another groan from me. Tim fumbled with my belt, then yanked it off in a swift movement.
He leaned in close and whispered, “What would you say if I told you I wanted to use this on you?”
“Yes, fucking God, yes, anything. Just touch me, please.”
“When I’m ready.” Tim stepped away, and I felt the cool air replace his warmth. I whined, not caring that it didn’t sound at all manly. “You’ve got ten minutes to get ready. Rachel took me to get my car, so I picked up supplies on my way home. You’ll find everything you need in the en suite. Once you’re done, you’ll go to my bedroom, strip off your clothes, and lay on your back. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
I flew down the hall to the bathroom. True to his word, there was a douching kit lying on the sink. I had no idea why he assumed I’d bottom for him, but…. Oh, who was I kidding
? Him leaning over me, sliding home, and the look on his face as he did—that was my favorite jack-off fantasy ever since I discovered how good it felt to rub my cock.
It didn’t take me long to finish up, and then I rushed to his room. It hadn’t changed much. The walls had been repainted and the carpeting replaced, but his bed was the same, a king-size mattress that had held the both of us when we were younger. Throwing my remaining clothing into the corner, I lay on the bed, my erection throbbing, pulsing with need. I had just wrapped my fingers around it when I heard a growl at the door.
“Didn’t say you could touch. Hands off—that’s mine.”
I let go and placed my hands by my side. Tim strolled across the room like he wasn’t in any hurry. The bastard. I looked at him, hoping to communicate my need.
He gripped my ankle. “Don’t worry. I know what you want, but I’m going to take my own sweet time with it, just like you took yours in coming back to me. When I’m ready, and that could be hours, you’ll get what I want to give you.”
My eyes rolled back in my head. This was going to be awesome.
TIM STOOD there, just staring at me, for a good ten minutes. Unwilling to break the spell, I didn’t move.
He finally stepped over and ran a hand over my leg. “See, you can be a good boy. But you were bad for such a long time, and that just won’t do. You scared your family and those who love you. Do you have any idea what that did to us?”
I wasn’t sure what he expected me to say or do.
“Good, stay quiet. Right now, the only time I want you to speak is if I tell you it’s okay.”
Yes, I should have protested, but seeing Tim like this was hot. He hovered, touching me on occasion, but the thing I noticed was the look of anger that never left his face. I thought this was a game, but seeing him like that actually scared me.
“Tim?”
“I said be quiet!” His voice was sharp and bordered on hysteria. “You don’t get to talk now. I have five fucking years of hurt and anger bottled up inside me, and hearing your voice? It pisses me off. Just lay there and shut the hell up. If you want this to end, you can get up and walk out the door, but don’t think I’m going to let you come back to me a second time.” He drew in a breath. “Right now it’s taking everything in me not to beat your ass. I love you, but I hate you, and I can’t seem to reconcile those feelings. So I need you to shut up.”
Run. Get the fuck out the house.
No. If there was one thing I was certain of, no matter how angry Tim was, he wouldn’t hurt me.
“You don’t know what it was like. You can’t. I was alone, watching my mom die, seeing your family fraying, and you were off living a life that, for all intents and purposes, was perfect. I get the whole ghost thing. I don’t understand it, but I believe what you’re telling me. But you took my dreams and crushed them without so much as consideration. I was always in your corner. I backed you when no one else did. And you pretty much crapped on me.”
He unbuttoned his shirt and slid it off his shoulders. His broad chest was covered in a dark mat of hair, his nipples barely visible in the forest. When he unbuckled his belt, I swallowed hard. Was he really intending on using it on me? Would I let him?
Yes. Because I’d done this to him. It wasn’t my intention to hurt him, but I had. I would take whatever he dished out if it got him back to being my Tim.
He slid his pants and underwear down until they pooled around his ankles. I blinked, wanting to be sure I was seeing what I thought I was. Puberty had been very kind to Tim. A thatch of pubic hair framed a long, thick cock. Despite my fear, I wanted it, wanted him.
“Do you remember what my mother said the first time she caught us swearing?”
How could I forget? “She said she’d wash our mouths out with soap.”
He reached down and wrapped a hand around his cock. “I have the scrub brush right here.”
Oh, hell yes. I got up and went to kneel down in front of him, but he stepped back.
“Uh-uh. You haven’t earned it yet.”
His pupils were so big, they blotted out the color in his eyes. He grabbed my arms and spun me around on the bed, so my head hung over the end. “Open your mouth and stick out your tongue.”
I groaned and spread my jaws wide, allowing my tongue to slide out. He gripped his shaft hard enough that the head was an angry red, then leaned in to run it over my tongue, and groaned. I closed my lips around it, wanting to give him pleasure.
“Keep it open. Don’t do anything but what I tell you.”
My lips spread again and I shuddered. I’d never known that he could be like this. Was it wrong that I was so fucking turned on?
He stroked his cock, and a bead of precum dripped out and fell into my mouth. “So fucking hot,” he whispered as he stretched over me, placing his hands on the bed and sliding into me. “Suck me.”
Finally given permission, I closed my mouth around him. He started pushing in slowly, testing how much I could take. When I opened my throat and he slid in, he gasped.
“Fucking take it, goddamn it.”
He shoved hard, his entire length going deep. The smooth skin, the thickness, the taste, the dominance—they all combined to make Tim the complete package. If he walked away or forced me to leave, he would have ruined me for all other men.
“My cock looks fucking amazing in your mouth. I always knew it would.” He patted my cheek. “I’m going to fuck your face. Can you take it?”
I nodded, willing to accept whatever he gave me.
Resting on one arm, he cupped my jaw with the other. A few long, deep thrusts, and then he slammed into my face, his balls banging on my forehead. No one had ever made me feel like Tim did right now. My fear ebbed, replaced by a longing in the pit of my stomach. This was where I was meant to be. I could only hope that when we were done, he’d realize he loved me more than he hated me.
A sharp smack to my shoulder brought my attention back to him.
“Focus on me. I don’t want your thoughts anywhere else, do you understand?”
The edge was still in his voice, but now there was longing and a huskiness there as well. He continued to long-dick my throat, pushing deep with each thrust. His breathing came in rapid pants, and just when I thought he was going to unload in my mouth, he pulled free and hovered over me, gasping for breath.
“Too good, but that’s not what I want. Roll over, facedown on the bed.”
I moved when he slapped my asscheek. The sting and the burn felt… good. Well, way better than I expected. As I positioned myself the way he wanted, the slide of a drawer opening caught my attention, especially after it was followed by the sound of tearing foil, then the snick of a cap. A moment later, a cool drizzle of what I could only assume was lube slid between my cheeks.
“Is that a shiver from the lube or anticipation, I wonder.” Tim worked his fingers in my ass, smearing the lube around, loosening me for him. “Not that I care right now. See, you were supposed to be my first, last, and always. Then you took off, and who knows how many men fucked you while you were gone.”
I knew I should defend myself. True, I wasn’t a virgin, but I had only been with a couple of guys. Regardless, when I opened my mouth to say something, blunt fingers knotted into my hair and shoved my face into the mattress.
“Don’t bother to deny it, because I won’t believe you. Just shut up and let me do what I have to.”
The thick head of his cock met my hole, and with the way he’d been acting, I was certain he was going to shove the whole length into me. That wasn’t what happened, though. He was careful, went slowly, and gave me time to adjust. Whether he knew it or not, he was rubbing circles on my back to calm me.
When he breached my ass, I sucked in a breath. It had been a long time for me, and Tim was a big guy, but he was being so gentle right now.
“I know what you’re thinking. I can hear your brain working, and you’re wondering when I’m going to lose control and hurt you. Yeah, I’m angry, and it’s goin
g to take a lot to get us back to where we used to be, but I’m not going anywhere, and I won’t let you go either.”
It was that precise moment that I realized I’d been right. Angry or not, Tim wasn’t going to hurt me, and he wouldn’t do anything I didn’t want. I was certain if I said no, he’d stop. That wasn’t about to happen, though, because I wanted this more than I think I’d wanted anything in my life.
He pushed in a bit more, and the ache had begun to turn into pleasure. I tried to lean back, wanting him in deeper, but another loud crack on my ass had me stilling.
“Seems you don’t learn quickly. You always were headstrong, weren’t you? You’ll get what I want to give you when I want to give it. Not until then.”
“Then hurry it up.”
He chuckled. “Mouthy ass.” He put a hand on my back to hold me still, then with one hard push, he buried himself to the hilt. “Fuck, I knew you’d feel good around my cock. It’s like I always thought. You were meant for me. But we still have that problem of you letting someone else take what should have been ours to share. I need to show you why that was a mistake.”
He drew out slowly, then drove back in, knocking the wind out of me. Each thrust that followed was punctuated by a grunt from him and a moan from me. When he put his free hand on the other side of me, I knew he was bracing himself. This time, he shoved me down onto the bed, his weight holding me there. And from this angle, he was hitting every sweet spot within me.
He set a cadence—slow, slam, slow, slam. Our bodies were wet with sweat in the warm room, and his breath on my neck only heightened that.
“Fuck me, please.”
“Told you not to talk.”
“Don’t care. I need this. I need you, Tim. If I have to spend the rest of my life making up for my stupidity, I’ll do that.”
“Shut up. Let me stay mad.”
I laughed. “Okay. Fine. Fuck you. I’m glad I left.”
The Spirit Key Page 6