Deanna threw herself back into Maisey’s arms and buried her face into the collar of her shirt. Maisey smelled like maple syrup and bacon. On most days, that would lend itself to the comfort of the hug, but today it made Deanna feel lonelier. Would there ever be a day when she and Merrick would laugh over pancakes again?
“I messed up, Maisey.” She sat back and looked at the woman who raised Dalton. The same woman who mothered Samantha when she was down. Seeing the motherly compassion in Maisey’s eyes made her long for her mother. “I didn’t know he cared about me.”
Maisey shook her head. “Most men bring you a bouquet. That boy planted you a garden.”
Her chest hurt so badly. Could a person die from heartache? “Does the whole town know about that?”
The trill of Maisey’s laughter filled the room. “Honey, this is Aspen Cove. Not much happens around here that people don’t know about. I’m pretty sure we invented neighborhood watch. For example, Peter Larkin saw Aiden digging up some bulbs for you, so he dug up some of his overgrown irises. That got Charlie and Trig Whatley involved because they had a bunch of tulip bulbs that she never planted, so she brought them here. Ben and I grow a lot of our produce, and we had fertilizer in our shed that wasn’t being used. I believe Goldie and Tilden donated a potentilla bush or two.” Maisey leaned in and whispered. “Everyone knows those bushes need sun, but she planted them in the shade anyway because she likes yellow flowers. Moving them to your place was an act of mercy for the plants.”
“I had no idea so many people helped.”
“Honey, you live in a community that cares, but no one would have thought to offer anything if that sexy sheriff hadn’t started the project. He did that because he likes you.”
“I’m such an idiot.”
“Me too. I fell in love with the town drunk, but look at Ben now. He hasn’t taken a drink in over a year. Love makes you do crazy stuff. Like planting a garden for someone you don’t think likes you. Can’t you see, he did that after he thought you’d played him. That’s got to mean something.”
She groaned. “Did you hear everything?”
“I may be old, but I’m not deaf. I’m pretty sure that argument could be heard into Silver Springs.”
The embarrassment filled her so thoroughly, she nearly choked on it. “What am I going to do?”
“Do you love him?”
That was an interesting question. She felt things for Merrick that she hadn’t felt for anyone. When she thought of him, her insides grew warm, and her heart felt full, or at least they did until that morning.
“I messed up.”
“But do you think you could love him?”
Deanna nodded. “I think I could. I’m pretty sure I already do. Oh God. I totally screwed this up. What can I do?”
Maisey tucked her hair behind her ears and pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. “Does he need a garden?”
Chapter Nineteen
“Why would she say something like that if she didn’t mean it?” Merrick was behind the sheriff’s station, cleaning out the cruiser with Aiden and replaying every word Deanna had said to him.
“Tell me exactly what she said to you that night?” Aiden sprayed the tires with Armor All and lowered to his haunches to shine them up. Too bad life wasn’t as easy to clean up.
“She said, ‘At least our story is solid. No one would believe we’re not the real thing now.’” He raised his deep tone to a feminine pitch.
Aiden chuckled. “You have a lot to learn about women. If I were to guess, she was feeling insecure and vulnerable. She’d just done the deed and was looking for you to tell her that you were real.” He did a final wipe of the tire and stood. “I can’t tell you how many times Marina told me stuff just to hear me refute it. When she was pregnant with Logan, she kept telling me how fat she was.”
“Why would she do that?” Merrick gathered the cleaning supplies and tucked them into the caddy.
“Because she needed validation.”
“Not Marina. Why would Deanna think I didn’t like her?” He leaned against the cruiser. “If she would have asked, I would have told her right then that I’d fallen for her.”
“I told you to be careful.” Aiden picked up the supplies and headed toward the office. “I warned you.”
“I know, but how could I not fall for her. She’s pretty, sweet, and makes a mean garlic chicken.”
“What are you going to do now?” He tucked the car cleaning supplies into the mop closet and headed for his desk.
“I have no idea. How do I come back from something like that? I left her that morning, and I left her in the diner. I’m not that guy.”
“You are now. The question is, how do you make her believe that you’re the type of man who stays, and … do you want to.”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“There’s still the Red issue. You need to get clarity on that before anything else.”
During this whole mess, he hadn’t considered that Deanna could still be pining for Red. She didn’t make love to him like a woman who wanted another man.
“You’re right. I need to figure it out.”
The phone rang, and Aiden answered it. “Sheriff Cooper, how can I help you.” He raised his hand and waved.
Merrick walked out with one thing on his mind. He needed to solve the Red issue. The only way to get to the bottom of a situation was to start where the problem began, and that was with Red.
He climbed into the driver’s seat of the cruiser and headed toward the recording studio. If he couldn’t find Red there, he’d show up at his door. There was no use in talking to Deanna until he knew Red’s intentions.
Luck seemed on his side because he found Red taking his jack from the trunk just as he pulled onto Main Street.
With his lights flashing, Merrick pulled over. Part of him wanted to play the tough cop—the one who would swagger over and give the idiot a ticket for blocking a public driveway—but he wasn’t that guy. The motto “Serve and Protect” didn’t mean he only helped those he liked. It meant everyone was equal, and despite his personal feelings, he was bound to assist anyone in need.
“You got a flat?” he asked, stepping out of his cruiser and moving toward Red.
Red rolled his eyes. “You’re pretty observant.”
“Look, man, don’t bust my balls. Do you want my help changing it or not?”
Red set the jack on the ground by the rear left tire. He stared at it like it would somehow automate and change the tire itself.
“I tried to call AAA, but they said it would be over an hour.” His shoulders sagged forward. “I’m embarrassed to admit that I’ve never changed a tire myself.”
“Seems like a good time to learn.” Merrick went to the trunk and pulled the spare out. “You’re lucky you have a full-size spare. These days they usually give you a mini. I’ve even seen the manufacturers skip that all together and only give a can of Fix-A-Flat.”
Red lifted his hands into the air. “You’re speaking a foreign language to me.”
“It’s irrelevant since you’ve got a spare.” Merrick showed him how to set the safety triangles on the road to warn other drivers of their presence. He made sure the brake was set and took out the wrench to loosen the lug nuts before taking the jack and placing it in the correct position for stability. “You want to pump the handle until the flat lifts off the ground. Once it’s off, you can remove the lug nuts and pull off the tire.”
“Why are you helping me?”
“Why wouldn’t I help you?” He could probably give a dozen reasons why he didn’t want to, but they wouldn’t serve anyone.
“You don’t like me.”
“That’s true, but I’ll still help you.”
Red stared at him for a moment and then leaned down to yank off the flat tire.
“I appreciate it.”
“This turned out well for me.”
Red shook his head. “It’s the shits for me. Why is it good for you?”
“I was coming to see you anyway.” They worked side by side, putting the new tire on. “I wanted to talk about Deanna.”
“Dude, nothing is going on between Deanna and me. Apparently, there was never anything going on between you and her, either.”
That little jab hurt. Merrick’s inner six-year-old lashed out by picking up the flat tire and tossing it to Red, who wasn’t ready. It hit him in the chest, pushing out an “ugh” sound and making him stumble backward.
“She told you that?”
“Yes, right after she told me to leave her alone.”
“She did?”
“The woman hates me.”
“Good, because you’re not good enough for her.”
Red shoved the flat back into the trunk. “You’re right. I’m not good for anyone. I knew that from the get-go, but there’s no convincing these women when they think they want you.”
“Occupational hazard?”
“That, or a screwed-up childhood. I haven’t decided what I’m going to blame this time.”
“What about taking responsibility for yourself?” He knew too many people who blamed their shortcomings on their parents or used their jobs as an excuse for bad behavior. “You used Deanna.”
Red chuckled. He lowered the jack and put it away along with the wrench. “So did you.”
Red seemed to want to kill him by a thousand cuts.
“That’s not true,” Merrick said.
“Yes, it is.” Red crossed his chest and stood defiantly. “The way I heard it, it was both of you who wanted something. She wanted me, and you wanted mommy off your back.”
His words hit like a bullet to the heart. Maybe they were so painful because they were true. He had entered into a relationship, albeit fake, to get his mother off his back. “It may have started that way but,” —he clenched and unclenched his fists—“I actually care about Deanna while you never did. She put her heart and soul into attracting you, and you tossed her away.”
Red sighed. “Listen, there is a saying that goes something like this.” He took a breath. “If someone shows you who they are, you should believe them. I’m an asshole.”
“And you’re okay with being one?” Merrick never understood that feeble excuse for bad behavior.
Red leaned against his car. “You would think you’d be happy that I am. That gives you an in.” He rubbed the scruff on his chin. “I’ll never be the man Deanna wants. Hell, I don’t think she even knows what she wants.”
I want her to want me. “You owe her an apology.”
He shook his head. “I don’t owe anyone anything.”
“Not true. You need to say you’re sorry, and you owe it to yourself to dive deep into why you think women are expendable.” He pointed down the street. “I’d say it’s time you talked with Doc Parker. He’ll get to the heart of your problems quickly.”
After kicking off the side of the car, Red moved to the driver’s door. “That’s the problem. I don’t have a heart.”
“Thanks for being an idiot.” He turned around and walked away. “Just so we’re clear … stay the hell away from Deanna. She’s mine, or she will be.”
Merrick walked back to the cruiser. How in the hell was he supposed to win her back? Could she possibly love a man like him? In his experience, that was never the case.
Chapter Twenty
Sitting under The Wishing Wall, Deanna tore the top off a cranberry orange muffin. “Have you ever thought of making cherry muffins?” She asked Katie.
“Cherry? No, would that even be good?”
“I love cherry pie, and I can’t imagine anything having cherries could be bad.”
“I don’t know. I used to have a muffin a day, but now I’ve added cinnamon streusel and Sage’s bran muffins, and it’s totally screwing up my schedule.”
“Fine,” she said with a huff. “I figured if I could get one more place to get my cherry fix, I wouldn’t have to hang my head. Jewel orders extra Hostess pies, and Maisey saves me a pie that I get to eat on my own. I’m surprised I haven’t outgrown my jeans.”
“I’m happy to try it. I opened this bakery because Bea thought I’d make a good addition to Aspen Cove. Maybe a cherry muffin will be good as an additional menu item. The thing I’ve learned about life is if you never take chances, you never get what you want.”
“Now that I know what I want, I’m not sure if I’ll ever get it. I screwed everything up.”
She looked up at the corkboard and found the sticky note she’d put there. With a tug, she tore it free and crumbled it up, leaving it on the table in front of her. The only love she saw in her future was a snuggle from Sherman.
“Well, fix it.”
She glanced at Katie, who was filling up the display case.
“How do you fix something when you’re not even sure where you stand with someone? I mean, I thought I was in love with Red, and then I met Merrick. I thought it was all fake, but then I fell in love with him. Am I really in love or just in love with the idea of being in love?”
Katie’s eyes opened wide, and a smile lifted the corners of her lips. “Well, there’s no time like the present to find out.”
The bell above the bakery door rang, and Deanna turned her head toward the sound. Casting a shadow on the black-and-white tile in front of her was Merrick. His chin was set, and his jaw muscle ticked.
Deanna picked up the note and turned it over and over in her hand. She tried to avoid eye contact, but Merrick wasn’t the kind of man she could ignore.
He walked to the counter. “Hey, Katie. Have you got any of those turtle brownies?”
At the mention of turtle brownies, Deanna looked at him.
The set line of his jaw softened, and a hint of a smile played at his lips. Oh, those lips …
“I don’t, but I’ve got some walnut fudge.”
He frowned. “I was hoping for the turtle ones. A really good friend bought them here, and I’ve been craving them ever since.”
Katie cleared her throat. “Are you sure it’s the brownies you’re craving?” She plated up a walnut fudge brownie and passed it across the counter to him. There was nothing subtle about Katie. The sideways nod of her head made it clear she was pushing him to sit next to Deanna. “I find that sometimes we associate food with experience. In truth, those brownies were decent but not crave-worthy. I’d say you’re looking for something sweeter.”
Merrick chuckled. “I’d say you’re right.” He attempted to pay for the brownie, but Katie shook her head. “No charge today.” She wiped her hand on her apron. “I need to check on Sahara, so I’m going to turn the closed sign over, but feel free to stay inside.” She hurried to the door and turned the lock, then flipped the sign to closed before she skirted off to the back room. When the rear door slammed shut, Deanna knew they were alone.
“Do you mind if I join you?” His rich voice bounced off the walls.
The bottom dropped out of her stomach, and she swore her heart slid out too and hit the worn tiles on the floor.
“Umm, no.” She pointed to the chair beside her.
Here he was in front of her, and she had nothing grand to offer him.
They stared at each other for a moment. Her eyes followed him from his hair, down to his eyes, then his slightly crooked nose to those insanely perfect lips.
“I’m sorry,” she said.
He cocked his head to the side. “I’m sorry too.” He picked a walnut off his brownie and popped it into his mouth. While he chewed, he seemed to have a thousand thoughts rushing through his mind, or maybe he had none, and the contemplative look he had was merely him deciding on the quality of the treat he ate.
“How’s work?”
“It’s good. Not much changes here except poor Mrs. Brown’s cat’s clothes.”
Deanna giggled. “Is he missing today?”
Merrick shook his head. “Not that I know of, but there’s still time.” He set his brownie aside, placing it on top of her note. A sense of relief washed over her.
The last thing she needed him to see was how desperate she was for love. “What about you? How’s work?”
She thought back to yesterday and her run-in with Red. She would have thought she’d be more upset than she was. Letting him go also released a lot of anxiety. She was still full of self-doubt, and her self-esteem was probably at an all-time low, but there was a calm that came from resignation.
“You know, it’s all good until it isn’t. I think we’re a day or two from going on break.”
“Does that mean you won’t work?” He stretched out his legs.
A part of her wanted to climb into his lap and settle her cheek on his chest; to breathe in the scent she’d come to associate with him. The spicy cologne that ran through her veins like the first cup of morning coffee. Right that second, it was essential, like air or water. She leaned in and inhaled just to get her fill.
“I’ll work. There are a thousand behind-the-scene jobs that need to be taken care of. I take care of all the fan stuff. I do the press releases. I pretty much coordinate everything for Samantha. In the end, I work for her. The others …” She shrugged. “I do things for them because I’m nice that way. When we’re on hiatus, I’m back to being Sam’s assistant.”
He nodded and then cleared his throat. “Do you really want to talk about work or …” He paused for a moment.
“Or, I’d rather talk about …”
He reached out and laid his hand on top of hers. The warmth from his body spread through her like molten lava. There was something there. It was a visceral connection. It didn’t matter if her head wasn’t so sure, her body was on board.
He swallowed hard, causing his Adam’s apple to ripple in his throat. “Look, I totally messed this up.” He cupped her hand and squeezed. “I should have asked about the garden, but my intentions were good. I just …”
She moved closer. “You don’t have to apologize for planting me a garden. I owe you an apology. I never knew how much my words could have hurt you. I was … I was silly. I know better than to skate the subject. I work with men.” She giggled. “No offense, but the simpler I can keep it with them, the better chance I have of them understanding.”
One Hundred Mistakes: An Aspen Cove Romance Book 16 Page 12