Roger Blevins was dressed like a Native American tribal chieftain, lest any of us forget that his cultural insensitivity was boundless. Frink wore his own dress uniform. Macy Stoll, Blevins’s Girl Friday, dressed as a sexy librarian, or tried to, anyhow. Erszebet had costumed Tristan and myself to resemble Boris and Natasha from War and Peace. (Tristan, never having read War and Peace, assumed he was going to be dressed like the Cold War spy from Rocky and Bullwinkle, and was speechless when presented with the garb of a nineteenth-century Russian aristocrat. He did look quite splendid, I confess.) Frank dressed like the George Takei character from Star Trek, and Rebecca dressed like Rebecca, with a lavender wreath or something. Mortimer and Julie Lee were non-human bipeds.
Of course, Blevins immediately wanted to show off the ATTO to Frink. Isobel Sloane, the smart and tough head of DOSECOPS, prudently suggested that they come back in an hour, allowing them to make sure everything was “shipshape.”
Blevins agreed gaily, requesting they then be joined for a demonstration by some witches (whom we were supposed to call MUONs, a term Erszebet found onomatopoetically bovine and thus offensive. Of course.). As most of the witches were in party dress, Major Sloane could not identify them, and asked to solicit Erszebet and/or Gráinne, who were the easiest to find.
Once the two were located they grudgingly agreed to this. Erszebet had thrown a hissy fit when the DOSECOPS approached her, but Rebecca and I found her in the women’s restroom and convinced her this was not a return to the humiliating parlor tricks of the late 1840s. Gráinne was totally shit-faced quite merry and trying to molest Mortimer in the coat closet, which we discovered because Julie had been tracking her all evening in anticipation of just such an event. Gráinne had a thing for Mortimer (or more likely for whatever could only be accessed from his computer. Ah, the sad wisdom of hindsight.).
Anyhow, an hour later, Oda-sensei ceremoniously opened the door to the ATTO, ushered the quintet (two witches, Blevins, Frink, and Mrs. Blevins) inside, and closed the door on them.
The Secret Service detail that had arrived with Frink immediately grew agitated that they could not maintain a radio connection to him while the ATTO was in operation. I rather thrilled at Major Sloane’s attempt to explain the decoherence/multiverse premise to them—it was very satisfying to know that everyone on the DODO team takes an interest in what we are actually doing. The Secret Service official did not grasp it, concerned only with losing contact with the general.
“Don’t worry,” said Isobel Sloane. “Gráinne is so drunk that Erszebet’s the only one doing any magic, and knowing Erszebet she’ll come flouncing out of there in about twenty minutes, bored with all of them.”
And a wry sense of humor to boot? How I wish I’d had the bandwidth taken the time to get to know Major Isobel Sloane a little better. When I think of where I am now, I cannot but wonder if she either contributed to my situation or could possibly have prevented it.
To continue: Erszebet did not, in fact, come flouncing out after twenty minutes, or even after thirty, or even forty-five. The Secret Service folks were beside themselves with anxiety. Major Sloane, and Tristan, and Frank Oda, and myself all attempted to quell their misgivings.
Reader, we should not have quelled them. For there were things happening within that ATTO that can never be undone. If only we had known to be suspicious.
20:08:00 USSS 1: C4, get me Actual.
20:08:10 DOSECOPS C4 ACTUAL: C4 Actual here.
20:08:13 USSS 1: It’s been an hour and not a peep. I am beginning to get concerned messages from people in the Pentagon wanting to know why Backhoe is incommunicado.
20:08:22 DOSECOPS C4 ACTUAL: The Pentagon?
20:08:27 USSS 1: The Trapezoid. Was my transmission garbled?
20:08:33 DOSECOPS C4 ACTUAL: Sorry, I was distracted. I thought you said Pentagon.
20:08:40 USSS 1: I’m a little foggy myself with all of the weirdness around here and I may have said the wrong thing. I am referring to the [GARBLED]. The very large building across the Potomac River from DC that is the headquarters of the United States military. Does that help clarify matters?
20:08:51 DOSECOPS C4 ACTUAL: Sure. The Pentagon.
20:08:56 USSS 1: That’s what I’m saying! The [GARBLED]! People at the Pentagon are worried about Backhoe being out of touch for a whole hour.
20:09:12 DOSECOPS C4 ACTUAL: The door locks from the inside. We could force it. It would be expensive to replace and might ruin the evening for our guests.
20:09:30 USSS 1: It is uncharacteristic of Backhoe not to touch base.
20:09:37 DOSECOPS C4 ACTUAL: The environment inside of an ODEC is a little weird and can mess with people’s perception of time.
20:09:44 USSS 1: Oh, that’s reassuring!
20:09:51 USSS 3: Lights on the ATTO door are changing color.
20:09:53 DOSECOPS C4 ACTUAL: We see the door in unlock mode.
20:10:01 USSS 3: Visual on Backhoe. Visual on Stylus. They seem nominal.
20:10:10 USSS 1: Tracking device back online. Informing the Pentagon, they’ll be happy to hear it.
20:10:16 USSS 3: Stylus’s wife now coming out. One witch on her six.
20:10:22 DOSECOPS C4: Any DOSECOPS personnel near the ATTO, that looks like Erszebet. Do we have visual on Gráinne?
20:10:40 DOSECOP 5: Talked to Ms. Karpathy at the base of the ATTO steps. She says Gráinne is inside, feels unwell.
20:10:45 DOSECOPS C4: Copy. A reliable source earlier described her as drunk off her ass and sexually aggressive. Sending a medic.
20:10:58 DOSECOP 5: Ms. Karpathy concurs with that assessment. Says medic unnecessary.
20:11:11 DOSECOPS C4: It is SOP. Even if all she’s doing is lying on the floor unconscious, we need to get her in the recovery position and keep an eye on her.
20:11:15 DOSECOP 5: Copy. Ms. Karpathy is blocking the entrance. Says Gráinne wouldn’t want to be seen in her current condition.
20:11:21 DOSECOPS C4: Copy. Stand down and wait for the medic.
20:14:32 DOSECOP 5: I have visual on the medic.
20:14:40 DOSECOPS C4: We see her too. We see her talking to Ms. Karpathy. Sitrep? Audio garbled.
20:14:50 DOSECOP 5: Ms. Karpathy is reluctantly allowing the medic to enter the ATTO.
20:15:00 DOSECOPS C4: We see that. Why is Ms. Karpathy closing the door?
20:15:05 DOSECOP 5: Too late to ask, but she seems very protective of Gráinne’s privacy. Must be quite a scene in there!
20:15:12 DOSECOPS C4: We’ll send Facilities to clean it up in the morning.
20:18:51 DOSECOPS C4: We show the ATTO door cycling.
20:19:02 DOSECOP 5: Door confirmed open and medic coming out with Ms. Karpathy, as you can see, C4. Will get status.
20:21:14 DOSECOP 5: Medic reports Gráinne passed out and in recovery position, vital signs normal. Ms. Karpathy has volunteered to sit in the ATTO with her until she comes around.
INCIDENT REPORT
AUTHOR: Macy Stoll
SUBJECT: ATTO procedure violation
THEATER: C/COD
OPERATION: Year 5 Halloween Party
DTAP: Cambridge, MA, present day
FILED: Day 1921 (November 1, Year 5)
The ATTO was left powered up overnight. No harm and no casualties are known to have resulted from this incident. This appears to have been an oversight resulting from an impromptu demo that was staged during the party for LTG Frink. Some of our personnel remained in the ATTO following the conclusion of the tour and there seems to have been confusion as to who was responsible for powering the system down at the conclusion of the demo and placing it in a safed condition.
Dr. Oda assures me that the system is designed to run for an indefinite period of time without harm and so I’m sure you’ll all be relieved to know that the ATTO has passed a thorough systems checkup in the wake of this incident.
So, no harm, no foul—but I am writing it up anyway as a “lessons learned” document. Remember, we don’t yet know everything about
what can happen inside an operating ODEC and so it is never approved procedure to leave one turned on and unattended.
Post by Macy Stoll to Dr. Roger Blevins
on private ODIN channel, 10:30
DAY 1923 (3 NOVEMBER, YEAR 5)
Dr. Blevins, Gráinne failed to report to the ATTO for scheduled psy-ops research activities this morning at 0900. Keycard records show she did not report for work this morning, and she did not call in sick or otherwise advise us as to the reason for her absence. Normally this would be handled as a routine HR matter but because of her special status I felt it best to bring it to your attention directly. Shall I check in with the staff at the MUON residence?
Reply from Dr. Blevins, 15:49, same day:
Macy, apologies for the belated response, but I wanted to let you know that I just saw Gráinne in person, looking a little the worse for wear after her activities at the Halloween party, which have already become the stuff of internal DODO legend—all classified, of course. As you can appreciate, the concept of calling in sick is unfamiliar to Anachrons and so I think we can overlook her failure to do so this morning.
GRÁINNE’S
FINAL LETTER
to GRACE O’MALLEY
PART 2
And so, to make a short tale of it, when they were through pumping me with the potions, Erszebet brought a gown like her own for me to wear, the most brilliant colors, I felt like a lady of the court, so I did! And she brought me out into the world of Cambridge (not England’s Cambridge, of course) and showed me the many many things I referred to earlier, which as I said would take half a lifetime to describe proper-like. So in the interest of finishing this before you die, I’ll be staying with the part of this story that’s to do with my plans.
The place is full of rules and regulations, and doesn’t Erszebet just ignore every single one of them, and what can they do about it? There is a reverence that is paid her, and no rules apply to her. She has explained many wondrous things to me, but the most important, of course, is why magic finally stopped working. Without going into the minutiae of it, as I’m sure Your Grace has no patience for it, it comes down to this: those natural philosophers and the rest I have been keeping company with in the shadow of Sir Francis? It is their doing. Those curs and their ilk as the centuries progress. These “scientists” make the world extremely technical in innumerable ways, and it’s not only that science is a new kind of magic that makes ours seem feeble by compare, it’s that their powers’ waxing causes ours to wane. And there is particular a kind of art called photography, which as I guess from the name means “light-writing,” or the setting down of light on paper. The effect is an image like a painting or a drawing, but as real as the real image being copied. It is wondrous—and everywhere. And the cause of magic’s end, so it is.
This means that for magic not to end, there must be no photography. Sure I am there’s other things as well, but that is where it ended, and so that is where the undoing must begin.
The greatest risk of my tenure in the future was to expose my intentions to Erszebet, on the strong suspicion she would care to join me in my endeavors. And so she was, Your Grace—gleefully, almost greedily, did she agree to join my ranks.
“How appalling that I was so beaten down by these horrible Yankees,” she said (not certain am I, what a Yankee is), “that I never thought of doing this thing myself. You are a witch after my own heart, Gráinne, a woman of integrity!” And then we pledged ourselves each to the other in the way of witches, which I must not share even with Your Grace.
And now doesn’t Erszebet Send me back, a few hours or a day at a time, so that I can be seeing to various matters of our mutual interest?
I am in London just now, to set some things in motion. But having done so, and having writ this very long letter to Your Grace, I will be returning to Tristan’s lair, with a plan to undo the undoing of magic. It must be done slowly and cautiously, to avoid lomadh, or as they call it in that era, Diachronic Shear. But it shall be done.
And here be my plan, which is of three parts.
First, I must be getting the money on my side, because after magic wanes money is the most powerful thing on earth (followed by weapons that destroy whole cities in a go, and religion—that never goes away, damn it!—and lastly, female actors who do not wear much clothing). Having little enough need for money in London, I have been but passing familiar with some men of the banking world, but by now I have corrected that, sure. The Gresham family seems to me already to be a waning force, but the Fuggers are savvy enough. I have arrived at an understanding with Athanasius Fugger, the man in our time with the sharp yellow beard. And in the future I have made the friendliest of connections with one Constantine Rudge, who is an important member of the Fuggers’ high councils, and who has been in on DODO from its very beginnings. And in other times and places as well, as Erszebet finds opportunities to Send me, I have sought out other Fuggers. In short, haven’t I predisposed the whole clan to be of assistance to me—or to “any comely Irish witch named Gráinne,” as it is likely to be their descendants that I deal with. They have been told now that an immortal witch has pledged herself to aid the family. And whilst I was in the future, with Erszebet’s assistance haven’t I made a study of whole eras of what happens between then and now, and coming back here, haven’t I whispered into the Fuggers’ ears where they should be adjusting their interests to keep the money flowing their way? Is right I have.
So I have secured myself access to money ahead.
The second necessity of the plan is to be getting rid of human obstacles. Chief among these are Melisande and Tristan. The Blevins is now my poppet, and sure I am he’ll be easy to dispatch in time. Tristan and Melisande I must somehow maroon. Tristan I’ve affection for and cannot bear to hurt directly. But seeing Erszebet’s animus for him, I asked her would she kindly get him out of the way, and she did heartily agree. She herself is warmer toward Melisande, and so we arrived at the conclusion that it’s myself shall be dispatching Melisande.
So that’s the second piece. The third is the Great Undertaking itself. Using the wisdom of the Chronotron and the power of the ODEC, I must send their agents (what they call DOers) back in time to gently unweave that which has led to this madness called photography. In order to avoid lomadh, I must dismantle things gently. But persistently. I will start at the end and unweave backwards through time.
Your Grace, please know that I do all of this not only for magic but for Ireland and love of yourself. I suspect it’s never again that I’ll be on my native soil, and sure my heart is aching for it, but it is a far better thing I do now, than any magic or even spying I have ever done.
My heart is with you as I leave for this great battle.
Yours, Gráinne
Post by Macy Stoll to Dr. Roger Blevins
on private ODIN channel, 23:49
DAY 1923 (3 NOVEMBER, YEAR 5)
Dr. Blevins,
Sorry for the late-night post, which I understand you are unlikely to see until the morning. I’ve been burning the midnight oil here at the office, collating some records from our internal security systems over the last few weeks, and have uncovered something you need to hear about as soon as possible. Headed for home now to get some shuteye, but I’m hoping that by the time I show up for work tomorrow you’ll have made time in your schedule for a private face-to-face.
LETTER ON PERSONAL STATIONERY OF DR. ROGER
BLEVINS TO LTG OCTAVIAN K. FRINK
DAY 1925 (5 NOVEMBER, YEAR 5)
Okie—
Can’t say how pleased Bess and I were to have you up here for the Halloween party. As the years go by it’s the old friendships that seem to matter most.
What good luck it was, to boot, that we were able to spend a bit of time in the ATTO watching the two MUONs ply their trade. For years I’ve been bending your ear about all of the things that these women can do beyond just Sending our agents to faraway DTAPs, but there’s nothing like a practical demonstration.
<
br /> In that vein, I’m writing to recommend we shift the hierarchy of contemporary witches. Now that Gráinne has been here a couple of months, and I’ve had a chance to see her in action, I realize that my earlier misgivings about her reliability are completely unfounded. She is sincerely devoted to our work here. I recommend she be given seniority right below Erszebet—and frankly, if she could keep off the sauce, she might one day replace Erszebet. She’s very gifted at what she does, since she is from an era when magic was strong and she practiced it regularly, which is not true of Erszebet.
More important, however, she is remarkably agreeable to work with, and has none of Erszebet’s attitude—which after nearly five years continues to make her a pain in the neck. It was one thing when Erszebet was the only means to our performing magic, but she’s just a cog in a machine now and yet continues to carry herself as if she were the queen bee. Gráinne has none of that attitude—she’s a terrific team player. She is all about the bigger picture.
I think perhaps because (as she has confessed to me) she worked as a spy for Grace O’Malley in her era, Gráinne understands strategic thinking and even personal sacrifice in a way that Erszebet (and most of the other witches) just don’t.
Of course, demoting Erszebet would have a lot of unfortunate repercussions, so we’d have to finesse this a little by creating a new position for Gráinne—a parallel branch, let’s say, devoted to MAGOPs other than Sending. In ranking based on merit, Gráinne is by far our best witch, and we need to recognize and reward excellence wherever it flourishes.
Just wanted that on the record before the Christmas bonuses get calculated;-)
—Roger
Post by Macy Stoll to Dr. Roger Blevins
on private ODIN channel, 11:12
DAY 1925 (5 NOVEMBER, YEAR 5)
The Rise and Fall of D.O.D.O. Page 53