Excuse Me, First Love (College Daze #1)

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Excuse Me, First Love (College Daze #1) Page 25

by Danielle Burton


  She turned and glared at him. “She’s behaving like a slut, and frankly it’s embarrassing.”

  “Enough, Roslyn.”

  “Defend her if you want to, but don’t come crying to me when she ends up pregnant.”

  Gabi stepped away from me, her fists balled at her sides. “Well if I did, I’d never let you see the baby because you’d be just as horrible as a grandma as you are as a mother.” She turned and stormed to my car, climbing in and locking the doors.

  Everyone’s mouths hung open. Even I gawked at the scene. It was the first time Gabi had ever stood up to her mother.

  I glanced back at Gabi then faced Mrs. Tanner. “With all due respect, don’t ever call her out of her name again.” I left them all standing there and went to the passenger side of my car. I knocked on the window but Gabi kept her head down. Using the button on my keys, I unlocked the door and climbed in.

  She barreled into my arms, sobbing against my chest.

  “It’s okay, baby. JJ’s here.”

  “I hate her.” Her chest heaved, and she sniffed hard as more sobs broke free.

  I held her close, rubbing her back until she calmed down. “Don’t let her get to you. People like her take pleasure in hurting others. Don’t feed into it.”

  She lifted her head and wiped her face. “I don’t want to, but I can’t help it. Why does she have this effect on me?”

  “Because she’s your mom. And even when you hate her, you still love her.”

  “I don’t want to love her.”

  I pulled her to my chest and kissed her forehead. She laid there for a long time still sniffling every so often. After a while she lifted her head and wiped her eyes with the sleeves of her coat. “I yelled at my mom.”

  “You stood up to her. It’s a good thing. I’m proud of you.”

  “Then why do I feel so awful?”

  I tilted her chin up to meet her eyes. “Because you have a big heart, and the inability to hate anyone. Which is also a good thing.”

  “Think I should apologize?”

  I thought of telling her no, but it wasn’t my place. I wanted her to have a relationship with her mom, but a healthy one. “That’s up to you. But I do think you should talk to her. Let her know how it makes you feel when she says those things to you.”

  “Trust me, she knows. She just doesn’t care.”

  “Then talk to her about that. Ask her to stop. Demand it if you have to, but you can’t keep letting her bully you.”

  She nodded and sat up straight. “Okay. I’ll try.”

  We left the car and made or way inside. Cam was seated in the living room, texting on her phone. She looked up at us when we came in. “You okay, Gabi?”

  “Yeah. Sorry about all the drama.”

  Cam waved the apology off. “Don’t sweat it. Nothing compared to me and my mom. We’ve come to blows on more than one occasion.”

  Gabi nodded, then continued toward the kitchen where arguing could be heard through the door. Mr. Tanner was speaking in a level tone and his wife was yelling over him.

  “Why are you always defending her?”

  “All I’m saying is that the name calling was completely unnecessary.”

  Mrs. Tanner scoffed. “Was her disrespecting me necessary? She’s such an ungrateful little–”

  Gabi barged through the door. “Ungrateful?”

  Her parents spun to face us.

  Gabi planted her hands on her hips, a scowl etched on her face. “What reason do I have to be grateful? Grateful for a mother who makes it her duty to insult me every chance she gets? For making me feel like crap? All you’ve ever been is evil to me. Why? Why is it so hard for you to act like my mother?”

  Mrs. Tanner’s brow lowered, and she smacked her hand against the counter. “Because I’m not! I am not your mother.”

  Twenty - Seven

  Gabi

  “Roslyn!” My dad shouted.

  “What? She asked. It’s about time she knew the truth, don’t you think?” She turned without another glance at me and went through the door that led to the test kitchen my dad had built for her.

  My eyes darted from my mother’s retreating back to my dad. “W-what’s she talking about, Daddy?”

  He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

  Jay gripped my shoulders, massaging the tension in them.

  I shrugged him off and moved closer to my father. “Dad, what’s she talking about? Did you– Am I...adopted?”

  His soft brown eyes met mine for a brief second before darting away. “Gabi...”

  I hugged my arms to my body, shaking my head. “I can’t be. That doesn’t make any sense. I look like you, Daddy. I have your nose…your ears.” Tears streamed down my face, but I was too busy sobbing to wipe them away.

  My dad pulled me to him and hugged me. “I am your father, baby girl. You’re mine.”

  I broke away and looked at him. “But–”

  “I’m your father, but Roslyn...” he rubbed at the back of his neck and dropped his gaze. “She’s not your biological mother.”

  “But–then who”

  “She’s your step mom. You were about two when we got married.”

  I stared into his face, trying to comprehend what he was telling me. This wasn’t making any sense. I know I was young, but wouldn’t a two-year-old remember? I didn’t recall her ever not being there. “Where is my real mom?”

  He looked at me with tears brimming his eyes. “She passed away a long time ago.”

  My stomach sank. This felt like a soap opera. My real mom was dead and my...step mom? hated me. “What about Kasper?”

  “What about me?”

  I whipped around to find Kas standing near the door. There was a pretty brown skinned girl on his arm who was reminiscent of a deer caught in head lights.

  I faced my father again, still waiting for his answer.

  “He’s both of ours.”

  I tried to swallow down my tears but they kept coming. “You lied to me.”

  “Gabi–”

  “My whole life, you lied to me.” Heat ignited in my chest working its way up my neck to my face, a rash blooming beneath my skin.

  My dad stood in front of me and brushed my hair back. “Sweetheart–”

  I swatted his hand away and backed up. “Don’t!” My fists tightened at my sides and my breath came in heavy bursts. “I probably came to you a million times, asking you why mom hated me, but instead of being honest you continued with this charade. You let me believe I’d done something wrong to make her not love me. Allowed me to feel like something was wrong with me, like I wasn’t good enough for my own mother to love. What kind of father does that?”

  “Sweet Pea–”

  I spun away from him, brushed past Kas and stormed out of the kitchen. I made it outside struggling to breathe. I would’ve expected something like this from my...step mom, but my father...how could he? He knew how desperate I was for my mother’s love.

  My chest burned as I continued down the walkway. Something slipped under my boot and my legs came out from beneath me. Rolling onto my back, I stared up at the gray sky. Cold, white flakes drifted down, cooling my feverish skin.

  “Gabi!” Jay stooped down and looked over me. “You okay, baby?”

  Before I could answer, my dad called my name from the porch. I wrapped my arms around Jay’s neck, so he’d pick me up. Cradled in his arms with my head nestled against his chest is the only place I wanted to be at the moment. “Please take me home, JJ.”

  He lifted me and took me to his car.

  I sat in the passenger seat while he talked to my dad about something.

  Jay went around to the driver’s side and climbed in. “He said–”

  “I don’t care. Just take me home.”

  He stared at me for a moment then nodded and got back out.

  A few minutes later the back door opened, Cam climbed in, and Jay got behind the wheel again. He reached over and took my hand. “I know you’re
feeling betrayed at the moment, but–”

  “Jay, I love you, but please, not right now.”

  He nodded then started to pull off. A tap on the window halted our escape.

  I rolled down my window to see what Kas wanted.

  “Sis...you okay?” He tucked the side of his bottom lip into his mouth and shook his head. “Dumb question.”

  “Kas, we have to go.”

  He ignored me and reached into the car to unlock my door. He then opened it and pulled me into a hug. “I’m so sorry, Sis.”

  “It’s okay. It’s not your fault our parents are lying jerk faces.”

  He chuckled into my shoulder then pulled away to look at me. “Don’t let this change us, okay? Be mad at them, but please don’t leave me sis.”

  I patted his cheek and offered a small smile. “I’d never leave you, Kasper. You’re my big little brother.”

  “I know the situation is beyond messed up, but you should try to look on the bright side.”

  “What bright side?”

  He shrugged. “I don’t know, but you always find one.”

  We shared another hug, and then he stepped back so we could drive off.

  I called him before he could walk away.

  “Yeah?”

  “Was that your girlfriend?”

  A huge grin spread across his face and he nodded.

  “She’s gorgeous.”

  “This I know, sis.”

  “Is it just me or does she not look quite fifteen?”

  He chuckled and started backing away. “She’s not fifteen, Gabi. She’s seventeen.”

  “Seventeen!”

  He continued to laugh and took off running.

  ~ ♥ ~

  I closed my eyes and leaned my head against the window, trying to clear it of the million thoughts running through it. I didn’t want to think about my lying family or the fact I’d gained and lost a mother in a matter of minutes. Make that two, because I was never speaking to Roslyn again. She wasn’t my mother, so I no longer had a reason to yearn for her affection. And my father...I didn’t even want to look at him right now.

  A while later the engine cut off. I wasn’t exactly how much time had passed, but when I opened my eyes we were parked outside of a small hotel. “Why’d we stop?”

  Jay took the key from the ignition then pulled his wool hat back over his head. “Because it’s a ten-hour drive back to River Crest and I’m not trying to kill anyone.”

  While he went to the desk to get us rooms, I sat in the lobby next to Cam.

  She squeezed my hand then leaned over and gave me a half hug. “If you want to talk, I’m here. Okay?”

  I nodded but said nothing. I just wanted to take a hot shower then sleep. I was tired of thinking and needed this to be day over.

  Jay came over to us and handed Cam a key card. “All set.”

  Cam bid us fare well and went to her room.

  Once inside of ours, I left a trail of clothes to the bathroom and shut the door behind me.

  I stood in front of the mirror staring at my reflection. My hair was bone straight, in an effort to please my mo—Roslyn. I’d spent years searching for the reason why my efforts to gain her affection had failed. I guess I finally had my answer. She wasn’t my mother.

  But still...she was the only one I’d ever known, and try as I might, I couldn’t find it in my heart extinguish the love I felt for her. I think that’s what angered me the most.

  Studying my face, a small part of me wished I’d stayed to at least hear what my dad had to say about my biological mother. What was her name? What happened to her? Did I look like her? Everyone always said I looked just like my father, and while we bore a strong resemblance certain features were unique to both he and Roslyn, who I’d always assumed my other aesthetics came from.

  I ran my index finger over the bridge of my nose which was straight, where my dad’s had a bump.

  My lips held a pinkish hue and were plump while my dads were thinner.

  I leaned closer to the mirror, examining my eyes. They were medium brown; my dads were dark. I allowed myself a small smile knowing they had to be my mom’s eyes, my real mom.

  Jay knocked on the door and peeked in. “You okay, Little Red?”

  I mulled over his question a moment. The events of the day had been trying to say the least. My mother was my step mother, my real mother was dead, and my father had kept a painful secret for eighteen years. I almost laughed at how close to an episode of General Hospital it sounded like.

  But despite all the drama, I nodded, and I meant it. I was okay, because after so many long years of wondering what it was about me that could make my own mother despise me to the point where she made every moment of my childhood and adolescence a living hell, I finally knew...it wasn’t my fault.

  I went to the door and pecked Jay’s lips. “I’m fine. I’m gonna take a quick shower then we can talk.”

  He studied me a moment before nodding and pecking my lips again then taking a step back so I could close the door.

  ~ ♥ ~

  “You sure you’re okay?”

  I lay in Jay’s arms with my head resting on his bare chest. “I’m sure.” I ran my index finger over his full lips and snuggled deeper into his embrace. “Well, mostly. I’m okay with her not being my mom. It feels like a weight’s been lifted off of me. But I’m not okay that they lied to me. Especially my father. I’d expect something like this from her, but not my dad. He knew how much her approval mattered to me. How awful I felt when she made me feel less than a pile of crap. He could’ve ended my torment years ago.

  “Sure he always defended me against her, but had I known she wasn’t even my real mother, I think her words would’ve hurt a lot less, and I wouldn’t have cared as much if she loved me because then she’d have just been an evil step mother.” I paused and looked up at him. “Am I making sense?”

  He nodded. “I get what you’re saying. What I don’t get is even if she isn’t your biological mom, she raised you for sixteen years. Blood or not, she’s your mother and it’s just wrong for her to treat you that way just because she never carried you in her womb.”

  I sighed and shrugged. “I just want to enjoy the rest of the winter break. Nothing is going to ruin my favorite holiday.”

  He pulled me on top of him and hugged me tight. “Looking forward to our first Christmas as a couple?”

  I smiled and kissed his lips. “Yes. It’s gonna be so fun. I can’t wait to give you your gift.”

  “What is it?”

  “Not telling.” I stuck my tongue out and he leaned up and licked it. “Goofball.”

  “Weirdo.”

  I scrunched up my face, making him laugh.

  After settling down, he kissed me softly. “Are you really okay? Because you can tell me if you’re not.”

  “I know, but I’m fine, I promise. If that changes, you’ll be the first to know. Now, I’m cold, and if I remember the rules correctly you should be snuggling me.”

  He pulled the blanket up over my shoulders and wrapped his arms around me. “Good night, Mrs. Adams.”

  I lifted my head to look into his eyes.

  He just smiled up and me and winked.

  My heart fluttered with the possibility of our future. No matter what twists and turns our journey took us on, I knew that Gabrielle Naomi Adams would be the best mom she could be.

  Twenty - Eight

  Jay

  We’d been back in River Crest for three days and Gabi still acted as if everything was normal. I was sure it was a façade. I knew Gabi, there was no way she was okay like she said. Not over something like this.

  Her phone had rung non-stop for the first twenty-four hours, no doubt her father. She’d ignored every call and eventually turned it off. I wanted to be proud of my little strawberry for being strong, but not if it were for my benefit. I didn’t want her keeping things bottled in because she felt I had enough on my plate. She should know there was always room for her. />
  I peeked my head into my mom’s room and knocked on the wall.

  She and the girls looked up at me and she flashed me a small smile. “Hey, handsome.”

  “Hey, Ma.” I walked over to the bed and took a seat in the chair next to it.

  Gabi sat at the foot of the bed and Cam was next to my mom. They were both painting my mom’s nails a bright shade of purple, her favorite color.

  My gaze lingered on Gabi. It warmed my heart to see her taking care of my mom the way she’d been since we’d arrived. Per my mom’s request, she’d bought her a nice wig. She wanted to look presentable for our traditional Christmas photo. It was cut in a bob and streaked with silver. My mom thought it made her look sophisticated.

  Gabi had also sat with my mom for hours at a time. Watching movies with her or just talking. My mom was having a bad day when we’d arrived. In a deep depression and crying nonstop so Gabi did her part to help keep her spirits up.

  I was lucky to have landed such an incredible woman. I smiled, watching the future Mrs. Adams screw the top on the bottle of polish then look up at me.

  “Why are you staring at me, Goofy?”

  “Because I love you.”

  A smile spread across her beautiful face. “I love you, too.”

  “Here we go.” Cam rolled her eyes and sat her container of polish in the side table. “Mrs. Adams, these too will kill you with cuteness.” Her hand flew to her mouth as soon as the words left it and her eyes widened. “I am so sorry. I didn’t mean–”

  My mom patted her hand and smiled. “I was wondering why I was suddenly sick to my stomach, it’s nauseating.”

  We all laughed with the exception of Cam, who still looked mortified.

  My mom turned to me and reached for my hand. “I’m just glad these two are finally happy. It took my hardheaded son long enough to wise up.”

  Gabi stood and softly smacked the back of my head. “Mom, you have never spoken truer words.” She wrapped her arms around my neck from behind and kissed my cheek. “Do you need anything else before I shower and get ready for bed?”

 

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