Keep This Promise

by Willow Winters

  As always when I wrote, time passed without my awareness of it.

  Fingers aching a little, I stretched, cracking my upper back.

  Glancing over my shoulder, I saw my bed was empty.

  A little smile prodded my mouth.

  Jane never disturbed me when I was writing. She treated those times like they were sacred, making me, and what I loved to do, feel more important than anyone had ever made me feel.

  Still, I wished she’d stuck around. I would have been happy diving back into bed and fooling around. Not that I was sure she’d be up for that. Her room, which reverted to Lorna’s room during the holidays, was right across the hall from mine, and Jane hadn’t wanted to have sex since Lorna’s arrival from the East Coast a few days ago.

  Just in case Lor overheard or some shit.

  I tried to convince Jane we could be quiet.

  Or at least I could be quiet. I grinned to myself. For someone who was the quietest person I’d ever met, Jane wasn’t very good at keeping her voice down when we made love. Chuckling to myself, I crossed the hall and got in the shower. She had no idea what that did to my ego.

  Afterward, I made my way downstairs. The place was empty.

  It wasn’t until I switched on the coffee maker that I saw Jane and Lorna out by the pool. I walked over to the sliding glass door, which was already partially open. The murmur of their conversation met my ears as I leaned against the counter to chug back some caffeine. I couldn’t really make out what they were saying, and I didn’t want to.

  It was just nice to see them talking.

  While Lorna had been surprisingly nice to me since she got back from school, she’d been giving Skye and Jane the cold shoulder. Skye, I didn’t get. And her attitude was driving my big sister into herself.

  They’d given her character in the hospital TV show a huge storyline. Since it was about her character being raped by a colleague, a long, drawn-out, months-long storyline, Skye was emotionally drained. I worried about her. Yeah, I was proud of her because I’d caught some clips of the show and she was awesome in it, but the pressure she was under was unreal. I only watched clips, though. No way in hell could I watch my big sister in a simulated rape scene.

  Fuck no.

  Jane and I barely saw Skye these days, and when we did, she was completely withdrawn. I was concerned about her relapsing, but there wasn’t a lot I could do when Skye kept telling me she was fine and there was no evidence of drug or alcohol abuse in the house.

  Still, I didn’t need Lorna giving Skye crap for apparently no reason.

  Yet I didn’t want to start anything with my little sis since she and I were in a good place.

  I was sitting at the counter eating a bowl of cereal when my girl and Lorna strolled back into the house. Lorna smiled brightly when she saw me.

  “Jane says you’ve been writing this morning.”

  My eyes flicked to Jane, who wore a pensive expression. “That I have.”

  “Well, fingers crossed it’s a huge best seller so I don’t end up looking after you in your old age,” Lorna teased and pressed a quick kiss to my temple before she breezed past. “I’m heading out. I promised my old track mates I’d meet them for lunch on Rodeo Drive. I’ll be back tonight in time for Santa!”

  The door slammed shut behind her, and I raised an eyebrow at Jane. “Is it just me or does she seem in a good mood?”

  Jane shrugged, grabbed a spoon out of the drawer, and leaned over the counter to spoon a bunch of Cheerios from the mountain I was depleting. She chewed, pretty eyes on me, crunching the Cheerios loudly.

  I grinned at her.

  She swallowed. “What?”

  “You’re cute.”

  She wrinkled her nose, but the dimple in her left cheek creased. I wanted to kiss it. I had the urge to kiss it every time she smiled. “Where’s Skye?”

  “I don’t know.” I jerked my chin to the patio door. “What were you and Lor talking about?”

  Jane leaned her chin in her palm, knocking my spoon out of the way with hers as she reached for more cereal.

  “You could get your own,” I teased.

  “Why?” She grinned and took another bite. Her words were muffled as she ate, but I think she said, “Yours are delicious.”

  “Are you avoiding my question?”

  “No. You keep distracting me from the question.” She rounded the counter and hopped onto the stool next to mine.

  Reaching for her, I ate with one hand while I rested my other hand on her leg, my fingers caressing the silky skin of her inner thigh. “What’s going on?”

  “Nothing. It was … it was awkward and weird.” Melancholy darkened her face. I didn’t like it. “For years, Lorna was my best friend, my confidante … and now it’s almost like those years didn’t happen. Or they were part of some other life.”

  I pushed away the bowl and grabbed her by the back of the knees until she was up and on my lap. She gave a bark of laughter and took hold of my shoulders before shimmying comfortably into place. Her legs dangled over the side of the stool as she ran her fingers through my hair.

  Unable to help myself, I kissed her. Soft, sweet, not trying to take it anywhere. Just a comforting kiss. I stared into her eyes when I pulled back. “She’s talking to you, though. Isn’t that a step forward?”

  “I guess.” Jane’s brow furrowed. “And she told me she wants to be friends again, that time away has given her perspective, and she can see how close you and I are. She can see that you love me, and she’s over it.” She smiled and I couldn’t help but kiss her again.

  “I sense a but,” I murmured against her lips.

  “Well, don’t you think it’s odd how mad she is at Skye? I asked her about it, and she said she didn’t really want to talk about it, only that it hurt her that Skye took our side in the whole thing.”

  “Fuck,” I muttered. That didn’t sound like someone who was “over it.” “Skye didn’t take sides. And she doesn’t need that shit right now. I’ll talk to Lorna.”

  “I can see that idea brings you much joy.”

  “I was kind of enjoying her being nice to me, but I’ll sacrifice it if I have to.”

  “You’re such a good brother.” Jane kissed me. “And such a good boyfriend.” Her voice was huskier, her kiss deeper.

  I groaned, nipping at her mouth. “If I’m such a good boyfriend, don’t I deserve an early Christmas present?”

  “Didn’t I give that to you four days ago?”

  I laughed at the way she quirked her eyebrow. Four days ago, I’d taken her to the ballet again as her Christmas present. The Nutcracker. Turned out, I wasn’t a fan. Bored, I’d nodded off. Next thing I knew, Jane was waking me and telling me to follow her out of the theater, but to wait two minutes before I did.

  “I’ll be in the ladies’ restroom on this level.”

  Instead of sitting through the rest of The Nutcracker, I’d fucked my girlfriend in the empty restroom. I’d bent her over the sink, while she’d held my gaze in the mirror above it, and I’d thrust in and out of her, mindless with want. Jane was so into it, she came harder than I’d ever felt her come. I had to cover her mouth so no one would hear us.

  I felt myself getting hard just remembering it.

  “That was my Christmas present to you.”

  She guffawed. “Oh, baby.” She shook her head, pouting condescendingly. “When a guy’s girlfriend gives it to him in a public place, it’s always her gift to him. In fact, let’s broaden that. When a guy’s girlfriend lets him do anything sexual to her, it’s always her gift to him.”

  Shaking with laughter at the cocky little brat, I squeezed her hips and ground her over my throbbing dick, loving the little hitch in her breathing. “Yeah? So, all those times I’ve made you come so hard you lose your mind, they weren’t gifts from me to you?”

  “Well …” She considered this as she undulated in my lap. My grip on her tightened and I hissed through my teeth as my pleasure sharpened. “I think maybe I need you to
do it again, so I can decide.”

  I jumped off the stool, and she wrapped her legs around my waist, biting her lip between her teeth. When I didn’t start walking her upstairs, I saw her eyebrows furrow with confusion. I rested her on the edge of the dining table and pulled savagely at her pajama shorts.

  My jeans and boxers were around my ankles by the time she gasped, “Jamie, here?”

  Her shock was edged with excitement. I crushed my mouth down over hers and thrust into her tight, sleek, warm heat. Our lips parted as we groaned together.

  “Anyone could walk in,” I grunted, fucking into her and feeling her pussy ripple around me at the words.

  Her fingers bit into my waist as she tried to lift her hips off the table to meet mine, but I gripped them, holding her still so I could slam into her at the angle I knew would blow her mind.

  “Anyone passes on the street and looks in, they’ll see me fucking you, baby,” I panted. “They’ll see how much you love taking my dick.”

  Just with those words, she shuddered against me as she climaxed.

  It only took a couple more drives inside her and I followed her into heaven.

  Grabbing her by the nape, I kissed her deep and wet, already needing her again. Gathering her in my arms, I carried her upstairs to my room and laid her down on our bed. As we kissed and petted and caressed, I felt her wet on my fingers and lost myself in her all over again.

  I made love to her, our eyes locked, gliding gently in and out of her beautiful body, lost in our private world. “Jane, I’m coming, baby,” I huffed against her lips, and slipped my hand between us to help her reach climax before me.

  Not too much later, she came, gasping my name against my mouth. I kissed her deep and hungry as I throbbed inside her.

  “Jesus Christ!” Someone hammered against my bedroom door seconds after I melted into Jane. “Is that all you two ever do?”

  My girl tensed at Skye’s interruption. Maybe because of the irritation in my big sister’s tone, or the humiliation of her overhearing us, or the fact that my sister sounded like she was slurring.

  “Fuck.”

  We heard something fall in the hall seconds before Skye’s bedroom door slammed. Jane stared at me wide-eyed.

  “You okay?” Anger coursed through me.

  “Jamie … was she … did she sound …”

  “Drunk?” I gently eased out of Jane and launched off the bed. “Yeah, she did. Wait here.”

  “Maybe you should give her some time.” Jane sat up as I pulled on my underwear and jeans.

  “Time?” I cut my girlfriend an incredulous look. “It’s Christmas Eve. Lorna’s home. And Skye decides now is the time to fall off the wagon?”

  “Jamie—”

  “No, if she’s drunk, I’m driving her straight to rehab. Wait here.”

  I shook with adrenaline as I marched out of my room. One second, everything in my world was good. School was great, Lorna and I were cool, and while I’d been a little worried about Skye, it wasn’t to the point it could eclipse the bliss of making love to my girl after several days of going without.

  Until now.

  “Fuck my life,” I muttered.

  I knocked on Skye’s bedroom door. Getting no response, I charged right in.

  Shit, her room was a mess. Her clothes were strewn everywhere and there was a musty smell as though she hadn’t aired it out in days. Hearing a noise from the bathroom, I rounded the bed and came to an abrupt halt at the open bathroom door.

  Skye was bent over the sink, snorting white powder.

  She blinked rapidly as she stood up straight and leaned into the mirror to wipe that shit off her nostrils.

  Fury and worry and despair held me in place.

  What the hell could I do?

  How was I going to keep her clean if she was determined not to be?

  Don’t give up. It’s not time to give up.

  She is not Mom.

  Skye turned toward the door and stopped when she saw me.

  Her eyes filled with tears. “I’m sorry.”

  Emotion choked me. “Skye …” My voice was hoarse.

  Moving toward me, she stumbled. Was she drunk too? Remembering the last time she’d had so much to drink and so much fucking coke she’d given herself a heart attack, I moved to steady her. I needed to stay calm. “Skye, how much have you had to drink?”

  “I dunno.” She shrugged, holding on to me as I led her to the bed. “A lot, maybe.”

  “And how much coke?”

  She waved her finger at me. “I just got it. Treenie gave it to me before she dropped me off.”

  I didn’t know who Treenie was, but it was the last time she was getting near my sister. “Okay, up, let’s go.”

  “Where are we going? Are you mad?”

  “I’m disappointed.”

  “Ugh, that’s worse.”

  “Come on.” I put my arm under her and helped her out of her room.

  Jane was waiting in the hall, dressed, eyes round with worry. “What’s going on?”

  “Doe, run out to the car. You’re going to drive.”

  I didn’t need to say anything else. My girl knew where we were going.

  Skye kept asking as we drove, but I distracted her. By the time I had her in the ER, it was too late for her to do anything about it.

  Thankfully, nothing happened. The docs kept a watch on her overnight, while Jane, Lorna, and I spent Christmas at her bedside in the hospital.

  When they discharged Skye the next day, I let her convince me she could get clean again on her own. That she didn’t need rehab, she just needed to go back to her AA meetings and get back in touch with Sheridan.

  Skye was so convincing. So contrite. So determined.

  I gave in.

  Not long later, I’d question that decision over and over again.

  Chapter 10

  JANE

  Eighteen years old

  * * *

  I couldn’t stop shaking.

  It felt like my bones were rattling with the force of it.

  Nausea covered my skin in a cold sweat, but I’d already thrown up the contents of my stomach as well as bile. There was nothing left to eject.

  Staring at the phone in my hands, I wondered how I was supposed to do this.

  It didn’t feel real.

  I’d felt anguish before.

  I’d felt grief, way too young to know how to deal with it.

  This was different.

  This wasn’t just my pain. It was … his.

  I couldn’t breathe.

  “Would you like us to make the call, Ms. Doe?”

  Swiping at the tears that rolled in continuous tracks down my face was pointless. They kept coming; I kept brushing them away. The police officer who’d spoken was gazing down at me, his expression kind, capable.

  Instead of his dark eyes, I saw Jamie’s ocean ones.

  Yesterday morning, I’d dropped him off at the university where he was meeting his teammates. They were heading to the airport together to catch their flight to San Francisco. Usually, I went to as many of Jamie’s track meets as possible to support him, but I couldn’t afford a flight to San Francisco. And I had a paper to finish for art history.

  Jamie had kissed me goodbye and then before he’d gotten out of the car, he’d turned to me and said, “If you get Skye to talk to you, my love for you will turn to adoration.”

  “You already adore me,” I replied.

  “True.” He grinned, but his smile fell quickly. “Just keep an eye out while I’m gone this weekend. She’s so goddamn secretive lately.”

  “Jamie, she’s been going to her meetings and talking with Sheridan every day.”

  “I know. I just … my gut keeps telling me something isn’t right.”

  Considering this, I nodded. “Always trust your gut. I’ll keep an eye out.”

  He kissed me again, told me he loved me, and hopped out of his car.

  Back at the house, I found Skye at the dining ta
ble, sipping coffee and reading a magazine. She wasn’t home a lot lately, and free weekends for her were rare.

  Sitting down beside her with my coffee, I stared at her magazine, trying to think of something to say. Jamie was right. Skye was secretive and distant. After the last trip to the ER, Lorna had taken off for school early. She said she had no patience for her sister’s “bullshit weakness” and wouldn’t be back until “it was over.”

  “And you said I’m the one who’s like Mom,” Lorna had said to Jamie.

  I didn’t need to ask what she’d meant. Jamie had told me a lot of stories about his mom over the past eighteen months we’d been dating. Among being mentally and emotionally manipulative with her kids, she’d also been an alcoholic.

  Frankly, I was glad Lorna was gone. Skye didn’t need her sister’s toxic attitude. She needed understanding and support from the people who loved her.

  Yet, I was afraid it was Lorna’s rejection that was the root cause of Skye’s current solemnity.

  “Talk to me.”

  Skye glanced up from the magazine. She sighed and pushed the magazine toward me, flipping the pages. She’d left it open on a particular page.

  One that featured an unflattering shot of Skye coming out of her AA meeting. The words “BACK IN REHAB ALREADY?” were printed across the top of the image.

  I swallowed hard, hurting for her. “Skye, I’m sorry. Does your producer know?”

  She gave a brittle nod. “I promised them I’m on top of it. I’m not fired.”

  “Good,” I murmured. What was I supposed to say? “No one pays attention to this crap.”

  Her lips twitched, but the amusement didn’t reach her eyes. “You don’t. Many people do.” Tears burned in her eyes. “I don’t want Lorna’s friends at school seeing it.”

  Ah.

  I got up from my seat and rounded Skye, sliding my arms around her and resting my chin on the top of her head. She gripped tight to my arms. “Lorna loves you.”

  “Does she?” Skye whispered. “It doesn’t feel like it. It feels like I lost her … and I felt that way before Christmas.”