Ashore

by Isabelle Adler

  “It seems I’ve underestimated you, Captain,” Griggs said finally, breaking the silence. He was smiling again, but it was the kind of smile that sent shivers down Matt’s spine. “Well played.”

  “So can we go now?” He was perhaps pushing it, but Matt didn’t want to spend a second more in these people’s company than he had to.

  “Not so fast. As I said, I’m first and foremost a businessman. Assuming I’d be willing to forget about you damaging and stealing my property, not to mention assaulting my men, there is still the small matter of our original deal. Funding for the repairs on your ship in exchange for your assistance with transporting special goods along with IMA shipments, I believe it was?”

  Shit. Matt really didn’t need that. He opened his mouth, frantically searching for the most diplomatic way to put it into words, when Tony unexpectedly came to his rescue.

  “That deal is a bust.”

  Everybody turned to look at her, and she rushed to explain: “I got a message this morning from Dr. Yang informing us they’ve decided to go with a different hauler for their moon shipments. Sorry, Captain,” she added, turning to Matt. “We were kinda busy, so I forgot to mention it earlier.”

  “No worries,” he muttered. Right now, he was grateful for what was undoubtedly Prof. Brinan running interference against them. The Onorean could be as spiteful as he wanted, as long as it got them off the hook with Griggs.

  “Well, it seems we are both out of luck today,” Griggs said. “You are free to go, lady and gentlemen. I don’t think I have to remind you to stay well away from both my associates and my ventures on this station from now on, do I?”

  “Got it,” Matt said, suppressing his sigh of relief.

  “Wait,” Ryce said. “I did win the race this morning. And as I recall, the winner was promised a cash prize of twenty-thousand credits.”

  Matt almost groaned with frustration. He could understand Ryce’s eagerness to score the money they so badly needed, but couldn’t he see Griggs was already pissed off enough? It was beyond risky to aggravate him any further, especially by trying to twist his arm in front of his subordinates.

  “Indeed,” Griggs said, without batting an eyelash at Ryce’s audacity. “And I will be holding on to that money as recompense for all the inconvenience your bunch had caused me—not to mention the cost of repairs to my yacht. I think it would only be fair, wouldn’t you agree?”

  “Yes,” Matt hurried to say. “Very fair. Thank you, sir.”

  Griggs nodded and made a sweeping gesture toward the main hatch. “Out you go, then.”

  The four of them got up and proceeded toward the exit. Matt brought up the rear, not daring to look back, his shoulder blades itching with the expectation of a gun blast hitting him in the back.

  But nothing happened. They stepped out of the lifeboat again, right onto the dock. The noise of the surrounding vessels undergoing maintenance and people milling about was overwhelming after the dangerously low tones of the conversation they were lucky to have escaped.

  “Is he really letting us go?” Tony asked in a hushed voice, glancing in disbelief toward the lifeboat.

  “For now, he is,” Matt said, just as quietly. “But let’s not forget he’s a vengeful bastard with a grudge. I can guarantee he won’t let this slide. The longer we stay on this station, the bigger the chances he’ll seek some sort of retribution. Don’t let that refined crap fool you. He’ll make it look like an unfortunate accident instead of ambushing us around a corner, but we’ll end up dead all the same.”

  “Then we either all leave now, or we all stay,” Val said. They turned to him, and he shrugged. “There hardly seems to be any point in smuggling me out alone now. He gave us a pass, even if it’s a temporary one. And frankly, I’d rather not leave you guys.”

  “Val’s right. Not to mention he’s in need of medical attention that I doubt Mr. Reid would be able to provide,” Ryce said. Tony nodded vigorously.

  “All right.” Matt threw his hands up. Any life-changing decisions would have to wait till they all got their food, rest, and, yes, medical attention. “We stay together. I’ll let Randy know we had to cancel Val’s trip. Let’s go home, get our shit together, and see where we stand.”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  “I NEED A shower,” Matt said, starting down the hallway of the Lady Lisa after depositing Val and Tony at the infirmary. Deep weariness settled into every bone and muscle in his body, and all he could think about was washing himself in blissfully hot water before passing out in his bed. Even the hunger already gnawing at his stomach had to take a back seat to some well-deserved shut-eye. “A fucking long one.”

  “Wait,” Ryce said.

  He was walking beside Matt, but now, he halted in the middle of the corridor, forcing Matt to turn to him. He couldn’t quite read Ryce’s expression—both apprehensive and determined at the same time. Cold dread coiled at the bottom of Matt’s stomach.

  “There is something I need to do first, and I’d like you to be there with me,” Ryce said.

  All thought of sleep fled. Judging by Ryce’s tone, whatever he was talking about was not going to be particularly pleasant for either of them, despite the slightly suggestive wording. Knowing Ryce, he probably had no idea it was suggestive at all.

  “Sure. Whatever you need.”

  He meant it, but it must have come out a lot more reserved than intended, because Ryce rushed to explain: “I’ve scheduled a call with Major Cummings, to give her my answer. I felt it’s something that should be delivered face-to-face, not in a comm message.”

  “All right,” Matt said, his heart sinking. He was hoping for at least a few more days of respite before the inevitable parting—a few more moments of shared happiness, especially after everything they’d been through—but it seemed Ryce had other plans. “Are you sure you want me to be there, though?”

  “Yes.” Ryce started toward the bridge, and Matt had no choice but to drag himself after him with all the eagerness of a death-row convict. A familiar craving stirred at the back of his brain, drying his mouth, but he could hardly make a pit stop for a shot of whiskey.

  “I want you to know I didn’t take the proposal lightly,” Ryce said as he sat in the pilot’s chair. The clock at the bottom of the screen showed two minutes to 13:00 hours. Ryce was nothing if not punctual. “And I’m absolutely confident in my decision. There are no regrets.”

  “Okay,” Matt said, sounding dead to his own ears. Really, there was no need to drive the point further.

  One minute remained. Matt took a deep breath. There was still time, however brief, to make his case. To beg Ryce to stay, to plead to give their love, their strange new bond, another chance. But the words died on his tongue, unspoken. If you love someone, let them go, an old saying went, and the bitter truth of it lanced through his soul.

  A loud beep indicated an incoming transmission, and they both turned to face the screen. Nora and Colonel Mensah appeared before them. This time, the officers were sitting in a different room, with rapidly shifting star-map holograms on the walls. Muted voices and computerized announcements filtered through, too low to make out clearly, as if coming from somewhere beyond the room itself.

  Nora’s eyes widened slightly, and she actually did a sort of double take as she took in Matt and Ryce’s disheveled appearance. Colonel Mensah appeared unperturbed.

  “Nice to finally hear from you, Mr. Easom,” the Colonel said pointedly.

  “Colonel. Major.” Ryce nodded, assuming his usual polite yet slightly aloof demeanor. It was quite astonishing to witness the difference between the cool facade he presented in public and the vulnerability he only dared display in his most intimate moments.

  “I apologize for tarrying with my response. There have been…extenuating circumstances—not that it’s any excuse.”

  Matt couldn’t help but sneer. Being blackmailed into criminal activity was a good enough excuse for tardiness, in his opinion, but he wasn’t about to regale Nora and h
er Colonel buddy with it. They were already getting what they wanted; any further placation would be adding insult to Matt’s private injury.

  “I wish to thank you both for this opportunity,” Ryce continued. “To work on something of this magnitude and scientific significance—previously unknown Mnirian technology—would be a dream job for any qualified xenohistorian, let alone an amateur like myself.”

  Here we go, Matt thought dully, bracing for the blow. He looked away, pretending to study something on the side control panel, which was currently switched off.

  “That being said, I must respectfully decline the offer.”

  For a moment, Matt was sure he misheard. He turned toward Ryce sharply, but he was focused on the screen.

  Colonel Mensah seemed no less startled by Ryce’s declaration. Nora, on the other hand, appeared much less surprised, for some reason. She glanced at Matt but said nothing.

  “That is very unfortunate,” Colonel Mensah said, unwittingly echoing Griggs’s earlier words. The set of her mouth conveyed the same level of displeasure. “I’m assuming this is your final answer?”

  “Yes. I’m sure you’ll find someone as qualified, if not more. In fact, I’d be happy to recommend several Mnirian technology and linguistics experts who would be suitable for this project.”

  “I won’t ask for your reasons, Mr. Easom,” Nora said. “I only hope that whatever it is, it’s worth it.”

  She pointedly raised an eyebrow at Matt, and he flushed. God, he hoped she was right too.

  “It is.” Ryce didn’t look at him, but simply hearing his words made Matt’s heart skip a beat in a much different manner than it had only minutes ago.

  “That’s the end of that, then,” Nora concluded. “We shall have to find another consultant for the excavation project. Good luck and Godspeed, Mr. Easom. Matthew.”

  “You too,” Matt managed to get out before the call disconnected.

  “What?” Ryce asked when the awkward pause, during which Matt did nothing but stare at him, stretched on.

  “Why did you do that? I know you wanted to take the job. I know. That’s why I didn’t say anything. If anybody deserves a second chance at having their career reinstated, it’s you.”

  “I can’t deny I was tempted.” Ryce swiveled in his chair to face Matt, gazing into his eyes. “And you’d seemed so nonchalant about the possibility of me leaving… Well, let’s just say we were both wrong in that regard, but it made me seriously consider accepting the offer. I’ve been interested in studying the Mnirian civilization for as long as I can remember. It’s partly the reason why I was so eager to help Commodore Archer with his plan—war effort aside. A discovery like the one we made seven months ago—an untouched Mnirian base with likely military application—is astounding. Who knows what else lies beneath the surface of that moon apart from the weapons? Just imagine the possibilities. It could easily be as groundbreaking as the jumpgates. As a scholar, I would love to work on something like that.”

  His eyes gleamed as he spoke. Matt had no doubt as to Ryce’s passion regarding this subject. He’d never been a scholarly type himself, but he could well understand the scientific curiosity that drove researchers and explorers on their quests.

  “But it’s a military project, first and foremost,” Ryce continued with a small sigh. “And I made a conscious decision to not follow that path again. Even if I no longer serve in the Fleet, while being a part of this endeavor I’d be forced to play by their rules again. As much as I hate disappointing Major Cummings, I don’t think I’m ready for that, not yet, even if it’s the smart, sensible thing to do.”

  Matt listened in silence. Judging by the uncharacteristic verbosity, this was something Ryce had longed to get off his chest for some time.

  “Besides, I’ve made decisions based on logic and common sense my entire life. When I joined Lady Lisa, I made a choice to follow my heart instead—and I don’t regret it.” Ryce reached out and took Matt’s hand, lacing their fingers together. His gray eyes still shone, but now they were brimming with a whole different kind of emotion. “I’m following my heart again, wherever it may lead me. One day at a time, for as long as we’re together.”

  Matt squeezed his hand. It felt like receiving a death sentence pardon—a second one within the space of a few hours.

  “I love you,” he said, his voice raw. “You know that, right?”

  “I do. And I love you too.”

  “Come here.” Matt got up, pulling Ryce after him, and heading determinately toward his cabin.

  “I thought you wanted some rest,” Ryce remarked, trying not to laugh at Matt’s renewed vigor.

  “Fuck rest. I want to shower, and then prove there are at least some things worth sticking around here for.”

  SOMETIME LATER, THEY were lying in Matt’s narrow bunk, their bodies cooling in pleasant languor, their limbs intertwined. Matt was happy to drift off on the waves of satiated slumber, but despite both the contentment and the deep weariness, sleep wouldn’t come.

  This had been a day of close calls and miracles, but even resting now in the safety of his lover’s arms, he wasn’t entirely at peace. Their lives hadn’t ended, but they weren’t going to pause, either, and the problems which had haunted him a week ago, before it all went into a tailspin, didn’t just disappear. Griggs was not about to leave them be, despite Matt’s little victory (or perhaps because of it), and he was reasonably sure Stahl wasn’t going to either. Revenge was a damn powerful incentive for a certain type of people, and Matt had met plenty of those in his lifetime to recognize them for what they were.

  Then there was still the little matter of the broken-down engine. With Tony’s IMA job lead going bust and coming out of Griggs’s races by the skin of their teeth but with no money to show for it, their hope of obtaining the needed funds was effectively dashed. Their spat with Griggs made it virtually impossible to get any sort of job on the station, which left them in a hopeless quagmire. With no other viable solution in sight, Matt suspected he’d eventually have to heed Tony’s advice, swallow his pride, and beg Nora for help. Now that they were on speaking terms again, he was reasonably sure she wouldn’t reject him outright—but asking his big sister for cash was something he’d hoped to never have to do if he could help it.

  That alone was enough to lose sleep over, but there was something else that was bothering Matt, something he’d somewhat successfully put out of his mind while there were more pressing concerns to worry about, but which now he couldn’t help but be reminded of.

  The problem was, he didn’t know how to begin broaching the subject—and if he should bring it up at all. Brinan’s words regarding Ryce’s father were forever seared into his brain, but did he really want to dump something so potentially painful on Ryce? It was enough that he had to carry the doubt. It wasn’t a burden he yearned to share with the man he loved.

  But Ryce had the right to know, didn’t he? Matt didn’t have the privilege of withholding something so important from him. Ultimately, this should be Ryce’s decision.

  “Can I ask you something…personal?” he said finally, lightly stroking Ryce’s arm.

  Ryce turned his head to face him with a lazy smile that melted Matt’s heart. Damn everything else; he was the luckiest person in the galaxy for being on the receiving end of that smile.

  “Isn’t it a little late in the game for us to be shy about asking personal questions?”

  Matt chuckled. “Yes, but it’s not that kind of personal.”

  “Now I’m intrigued.”

  “If you had the chance…would you like to know who your father was?” Matt asked carefully. “Your biological father, I mean.”

  There was a long pause.

  “I already know who my biological father was,” Ryce said tersely, and Matt’s heart dropped. How could have Ryce possibly found out? And why didn’t he say anything about it before?

  Ryce continued, oblivious: “He was a monster. A criminal. A pirate. A rapist. I don’t care what hi
s name was; I know what he did, and it’s enough to never refer to him as my father. I had parents—real parents. They didn’t always understand me or agree with my choices, but they loved me with all their hearts, unconditionally. John Easom was my father, and Sofie Easom was my mother. That’s all I ever need to know.”

  Matt pulled him closer, Ryce’s muscles tensing and flexing under his touch, and planted a soft kiss on his sweat-dampened hair.

  “I didn’t mean to upset you, baby. I’m sorry.”

  “That’s all right. I meant what I said. You can ask me anything.”

  Matt drew the thin sheet over both of them, and they once again settled into a comfortable, warm silence. He couldn’t help but be relieved at not having another difficult conversation with Ryce, even if it still felt like he was withholding information, despite the man’s unequivocal answer. But some things were better left well enough alone, weren’t they? And besides, other than the Onorean’s mention of the pirate ship’s name, he had no absolute proof it was actually Dylan Rodgers who was Ryce’s— That there was any connection between them. It would be too much of a coincidence, wouldn’t it? Many pirates and outlaws roamed the galaxy, and most of them were, as Ryce said, monsters. Any one of them could have been the one who’d assaulted Ryce’s mother twenty-three years ago. And even if it was Rodger’s ship, the culprit could have been any one of his crew rather than Rodgers himself.

  His eyelids grew heavy, and Matt finally let his body relax. Perhaps that rest wasn’t such a bad idea after all. He could think about all the shit they were in later and just enjoy this rare moment (or perhaps even a few undisturbed hours, if he was lucky) of peace.