Wall of Silence

by Tracy Buchanan

  Melissa frowned. Carter was Andrea and Adrian Cooper’s son. He was in the same year as the twins and Maddy. Lewis had never liked him, calling him an arrogant twat. As for New Year’s Eve, there had been a party at the forest centre. Melissa recalled that Carter had got a bit drunk. Andrea had been mortified. Come to think of it, Patrick had seemed a bit subdued after the party. Melissa put it down to him being tired with all the hard work he’d put into the upcoming election.

  ‘All I remember about that party is you guys playing happy families all night,’ Maddy said.

  Lewis gave a bitter laugh. ‘Happy families. Yeah, right.’

  ‘Mum?’ Melissa jumped, turning to see Grace watching her from the side of the summer house. ‘What are you doing?’

  They all went quiet in the summer house, clearly having heard Grace.

  Melissa’s face flushed.

  ‘Just getting the twins so we can go to the hospital,’ she said loudly. Was it obvious she’d been eavesdropping? She decided to style it out, walking around to the front of the summer house and knocking on the door.

  Melissa opened it to see the twins lounging together on the sofa, Maddy sitting on a beanbag.

  ‘Come on, time to go and see Dad,’ she said.

  Lilly frowned, picking at the material of her ripped stonewash jeans. ‘We’re not ready, Mum.’

  ‘He’s your dad,’ Melissa said. ‘You can’t not go.’

  ‘We will visit him, Mum!’ Lewis said. ‘Just not now, okay?’

  ‘Please, Mum,’ Lilly said, eyes brimming with tears. ‘I honestly can’t face it right now.’ Maddy put her arm around her friend’s shoulders and Lilly leaned her head on her.

  Melissa thought about pushing the issue, but Maddy was right there. Wouldn’t it just look cold-hearted? Maybe Lilly was right, maybe it was too much for them. If they didn’t want to go yet, she shouldn’t force them. Plus, it would give her the chance to talk to Grace alone. She was probably going about it the wrong way, trying to get the truth from all of them at once. Maybe the best way was to ask them individually?

  ‘Fine,’ Melissa said with a sigh, making a note to herself to try to glean what they had meant about the New Year’s Eve party later. ‘Look after these two,’ she instructed Maddy.

  Maddy gave her a salute. ‘Always.’

  Melissa walked away, their words echoing in her mind.

  What happened at the New Year’s Eve party . . . and what did Carter Cooper say about her?

  Chapter Thirteen

  Forest Grove Facebook Chit Chat Group

  Friday 19th April, 2019

  1.05 p.m.

  Tommy Mileham

  Right, Forest Grovians, we need your help! I’ve just got off the phone with Ross Shillingford and, as much as I admire the wonderful job our boys in blue do (having been one myself), in light of the fact there has been no progress with the investigation into the attack on our much loved Patrick, including the location of the knife used to stab him, we’re arranging a search of the forest to supplement the police searches that have been taking place. It will begin this evening at 5pm at the Forest Centre. Hope to see you there. Please share this post so other residents don’t miss it in their timelines.

  Rebecca Feine

  How do you know the knife hasn’t been found, Tommy?

  Tommy Mileham

  Still have some contacts in the police, Rebecca.

  Andrew Blake

  Here, here! Find that knife and we might find the DNA of whatever scumbag did this. No one messes with Forest Grove residents!

  Kitty Fletcher

  I don’t think inflammatory posts like that are helpful, Andrew.

  Ellie Mileham

  I agree, Kitty! Anyway, Peter and I will be there! Was chatting to some of the other mums during swimming this morning and we’re all in agreement we’re very worried about the possibility of their being a violent burglar targeting the town. Trisha Price confirmed her house on Birch Road was burgled last month. I’ll leave Trisha to share more if she wants but, put it this way, it wasn’t pleasant. Will PC Adrian Cooper be there tonight so we can ask some questions?

  Graham Cane

  *There

  Ellie Mileham

  Grammar not exactly a priority at the moment, Graham Cane

  Kitty Fletcher

  Correct me if I’m wrong, Trisha Price, but there was no violence involved. Just don’t want to create a sense of panic in the community, I know how these things can snowball.

  Trisha Price

  No violence but excrement smeared over the walls, sorry to be graphic. Was rather traumatising.

  Andrea Cooper

  I bet it was, Trisha. We wouldn’t want to downplay what you went through. Tommy, I think your idea of a community search is wonderful. Carter is an excellent forest scavenger so will be a great asset tonight. I suggest we use the main events area for a community meeting before the walk too? Jennifer Range, can you help with this? Adrian is on the case with regards to a police update. Can I also add, I’m so shocked by this, with every hour that goes past. As a community, we have a duty to such a wonderful man as Patrick to catch whoever did this to him.

  Charlie Cane

  Well said, Andrea, well said.

  Daphne Peterson

  Shouldn’t we check with the police first? Not sure how useful it will be having Forest Grovians trampling all over their evidence. What does Adrian think about this, Andrea Cooper?

  Graham Cane

  No point asking Andrea what her husband thinks, she thinks for him!

  Jennifer Range

  HAPPY TO HELP, WILL BE THERE WITH THE METAL DETECTOR.

  Graham Cane

  No need for caps *covers ears from the shouting*

  Andrew Blake

  Nice pussy picture, Jennifer Range.

  Daphne Peterson

  Andrew Blake, you’re gross.

  Jennifer Range

  DON’T UNDERSTAND, ANDREW, I’M NOT WEARING A CAP IN MY PICTURE, AND THAT’S MY CAT, SHE’S NOT A PUSSY ANYMORE, SHE’S TEN!

  Daphne Peterson

  Jesus H Christ. Is there something infecting the water supply in Forest Grove at the moment?

  Graham Cane

  Daphne Peterson

  Daphne Peterson

  I mean you too, Graham.

  Jackie Shillingford

  Daphne Peterson

  Pauline Sharpe

  Any more details on what happened from Adrian, Andrea Cooper?

  Belinda Bell

  I saw the police at Bill and Rosemary Byatt’s house earlier, bit odd?!

  Jackie Shillingford

  Why odd?! Melissa is staying there with the kids while forensics finish up at their house. The police will have probably been over to update Melissa.

  Andrea Cooper

  Okey dokey, to confirm, the hall is booked for 4.30pm with the search at 5pm. I’ll advertise this properly to residents with some posters dotted around. I’m printing them off as we speak. But if people can spread the word, that would be super-duper.

  Rebecca Feine

  Blimey, that was quick.

  Kitty Fletcher

  Andrea is nothing if not efficient. Thank you, Andrea.

  Tommy Mileham

  See you all tonight. Even if we don’t find anything, it’ll show whoever did this to Patrick that Forest Grovians won’t rest until we find out who did it!

  Chapter Fourteen

  Friday 19th April, 2019

  2 p.m.

  I knew Tommy Mileham would get involved at some point. Grandad says he’s like a bear. He can be all warm and cuddly and protective, but he can show his sharp teeth too if he needs to. When Grandad said that to Tommy once, Tommy loved it, chasing us around the garden. I laughed, let him grab me and pretend to eat me, but that’s because I always knew he’d never hurt me, that I’d never be his prey because he’s Grandad’s best friend.

  Except it’s different this time. He’s super angry at the person who hurt Dad . . . and th
at person is me.

  Thing is, people might go on about the police not having a clue, but they’ve actually got a lot of it right, how Dad tried to fight back, shoving me away then slipping. That horrible crack when he hit his head, that weird gurgling sound.

  Oh God. Deep breaths, deep breaths. I keep thinking of that today. Not the blood, like I was obsessed with last night, but the sound he made. Like when that mean-looking detective was staring at us with her beady eyes, all I could think of was Dad’s gurgle and I just know she saw the thought in my head.

  I was watching her while the other detective, the nice one, was talking. She picked a photo up of us all, the one Mum has on her Facebook profile of us in the forest. I swear she looked right at my face in that photo, right at it, then turned to look at me.

  Mum says Grandma Quail used to tell her you can sense things about people, sniff the darkness out in them. Is that mean detective sniffing out the darkness in me?

  Maybe she’s right, maybe there is a darkness in me. I stabbed my dad, didn’t I? It takes something to actually drive a blade into someone’s flesh, especially your dad’s. It takes a darkness, right? Something a bit mental.

  I overheard Grandad describing Grandma Quail as a bit mental once. I know everyone thought Grandma was odd, and maybe that’s the problem, there’s something inside me that’s been passed over from her. Something wrong.

  Now everyone’s getting all excited about this stupid search they’ve arranged tonight. Tommy’s even going to bring his big dogs with him.

  ‘They’ll sniff anything out,’ he always says.

  Will they be able to sniff me out?

  Chapter Fifteen

  Friday 19th April, 2019

  2.30 p.m.

  Grace peered out of the car window, her pretty blue eyes taking in the pattern of leaves in the trees above.

  ‘How are you, Gracey?’ Melissa asked as they drove to the hospital.

  ‘Okay,’ Grace replied.

  Melissa’s eyes slid over to her daughter, then away again. ‘It must be very tough, keeping a secret as big as this?’

  Grace continued staring out of the window, not saying anything.

  ‘Grace?’ Melissa pushed.

  She shrugged. ‘I suppose.’

  ‘You’re usually quite good at telling Mum stuff. You’re not covering for someone else, are you?’

  Grace shook her head.

  Melissa went quiet for a few moments, then asked the question she’d been dreading. ‘Has Dad ever hurt one of you?’

  ‘No,’ Grace whispered.

  Melissa let out a sigh of relief. It had been in the back of her mind, a thought spun from her own childhood and her father’s quick temper. She didn’t see her father much when they moved to the forest. When he eventually found another job, he worked long hours, then when he was at home he’d either be drinking with Ryan’s dad or working on the house. She never quite knew how he’d be with her. One minute, he could be utterly charming, showering her with gifts and making her smile with his handsome face and shock of Elvis Presley-style hair. But then other times, he’d be angry, picking at any little thing she did. Occasionally, he would slap her. She didn’t have to endure it as much as her mother, but it still happened, always when her mother wasn’t there. She’d explain her bruises away with a fall, like her father coached her to. He knew that if her mother ever found out, that would be the last straw . . . in the end, it was.

  ‘Did he ever make you do something you didn’t want to?’ Melissa asked in a low whisper, another consideration that had haunted her in the night.

  ‘No, Mum!’ Grace shouted, turning to look at her mum in horror. ‘Why would you say that?’

  ‘I’m grasping at straws here, Grace! Look, I know the twins are older than you, but you’ve said yourself you feel like you act older. If they tell you to do something, that it’s the best thing to do, that doesn’t always mean they’re right.’

  Grace’s eyes were expressionless. ‘I know that. I know what’s the right thing to do, Mum. We’re doing the right thing.’

  Melissa felt tears prick at her eyes. ‘It makes me sad you don’t think telling me the truth is the right thing to do. It makes me feel . . .’ Melissa thought about it, choosing her words carefully. ‘Lonely. I want to be part of the secret. I want to be able to help you.’

  Grace frowned. ‘It won’t help if you know, Mum, it really won’t.’

  ‘Why?’

  Grace sighed, turning back to look out of the window. ‘I can’t say.’

  ‘Well, Dad might wake up soon and he’ll say.’

  Grace’s little face tensed slightly. ‘That’s up to him.’

  Melissa looked at her daughter in surprise. ‘That’s a strange thing to say about someone you love, Grace.’

  Grace shrugged, her reflection in the window showing a miserable expression. Melissa’s grip tightened on the steering wheel. The truth was, she did feel lonely bearing this burden. She suddenly yearned to tell Rosemary and Bill. But this was their son, who had possibly been harmed by one of their grandchildren! How could she put that on them?

  It was down to her.

  She impulsively slammed the brakes on and turned into a small road, coming to a stop by the forest. Grace looked confused. ‘What are you doing, Mum?’

  Melissa twisted in her seat to face her younger daughter. ‘You’re going to tell me what happened last night, okay, Grace? I know one of you hid the knife, I know there’s more to what happened to Dad than you’re letting on. Tell me what happened.’

  Grace’s eyes widened. She almost looked scared. Melissa swallowed down her guilt. She had to find out, for the sake of their family. For the sake of Patrick!

  ‘I can’t, Mummy,’ Grace said. She hadn’t called Melissa Mummy for years.

  Melissa felt her resolve weaken again but clenched her fists. ‘You are telling me right now, Grace Byatt. Right this minute!’ It felt so alien shouting at Grace. It was usually the twins she needed to shout at, not Grace, who was so well behaved.

  Grace flinched at her mother’s raised voice. For a moment, Melissa thought Grace might tell her everything, but instead she just put her hands over her ears, shaking her head over and over. Melissa tried to pull her hands away.

  ‘Please, Grace,’ she pleaded, ‘what are you keeping from Mummy? Please?’ Melissa was sobbing now, guilty and desperate. Grace started screaming, her high-pitched shrill filling the car.

  ‘Oh God, I’m so sorry, darling,’ Melissa said, pulling Grace into her arms, stroking her hair until she calmed down. She’d been too hard on her. Grace would tell her in her own time, Melissa realised. She couldn’t force it.

  After a while, Melissa wiped her daughter’s tears away. ‘I’ll take you back to Nanny and Grandad’s, okay?’

  Grace shook her head. ‘No, I want to see Dad.’

  ‘Are you sure?’

  Grace nodded, so Melissa started the car and headed towards the hospital, arriving in Ashbridge a few moments later. Ashbridge was a soulless concrete town filled to the brim with buildings, a complete contrast to Forest Grove. It always made Melissa’s heart sink when she had to come to the town to do some clothes shopping for the kids. She’d even changed her food shop to be delivered to save going into Ashbridge once a week. She imagined her mother living there before she’d moved to the forest, away from nature. She must have hated it.

  Melissa parked up in front of the characterless white building and walked inside, heading towards Patrick’s ward through a labyrinth of corridors, her hand tight around Grace’s. She was still reeling from that conversation they’d had . . . or that argument. She’d pushed Grace too much, taken it too far. Melissa felt a sense of anxiety as she approached the ward, looking down at her daughter to see if she felt the same. But Grace just peered into any open doorways to look at the wards, hungry to see any drama.

  ‘There’ll be a lot of tubes around Dad’s bed,’ Melissa said, slightly out of breath because of the long walk . . . and the ne
rves. ‘They’ve shaved his head, too.’

  ‘You said, Mum.’

  Had she? She couldn’t remember.

  A familiar figure approached in the distance, dressed in a nurse’s uniform. It was Debbie Lampard, Joel’s old nurse and one of the original Forest Grove residents. She and her husband had been part of Bill and Rosemary’s ‘crew’, but then something had happened and they’d grown apart. She’d never managed to get out of Rosemary exactly what.

  ‘People change,’ Rosemary would say.

  Debbie was in her sixties now, still working hard in a job Melissa knew she loved. Like Melissa, she’d entered her profession later in life, having been a customer service manager before becoming a nurse. Her four children had left home now, and she’d had twins too, which had brought her and Melissa even closer. She’d been a godsend when Joel was alive, so loving and caring. Debbie saw Joel soon after he passed away in the night eleven years ago and had been devastated by his death too. Melissa often wondered if that was why she had moved away from paediatric care. Of course, none of them had expected Joel to live beyond his thirties, but for him to die so young had been shocking for them all. Yes, he’d been struggling leading up to his death. People forget there are muscles in the heart too, so Joel’s circulatory health was always a concern, and sometimes he had problems with breathing. But none of them had expected to lose him so young. As a family friend and the nurse who was always there when Joel was admitted to the hospital with problems, Debbie took it really hard. Not only had she fought to give Joel the best possible care, she’d also been the one to really encourage Melissa to pursue a career in care. During those long days in the hospital, the two of them would discuss the different options open to Melissa when she expressed an interest in physiotherapy and had even got her on the path of taking up a part-time degree in paediatric physiotherapy after years of being a full-time mum and carer to Joel.

  ‘Melissa!’ Debbie said now, rushing up to her and pulling her into a hug. ‘I’m so sorry about Patrick. It’s such a shock to us all.’

  ‘I know, I don’t think I’ve quite wrapped my head around it yet.’

  ‘You’re strong,’ the nurse said, grasping Melissa’s shoulders as she looked into her eyes.