by T. Styles
"That's not true," he yelled. “I even liked you before that shit happened with Rose. You gotta believe me.”
"You ain’t nothing but a rat. You fucked up Gage's head so bad she still cries at night. You turned on WB and Spirit because they fucked with me and you may have been the real reason Fierce killed himself. You foul."
"Mad, listen to me,” he said afraid she would cut his neck deeper, “because I can tell by your voice that you’re frustrated."
"I passed frustrated a long time ago."
"Okay, just hear me out," he paused. "You gotta understand that if it wasn't for what happened to that girl getting murdered we would’ve been cool. I never not liked you, I just didn’t know you. And so much has happened in my group that I wanted to be sure you could be trusted." Although he was being nice, he was secretly waiting for the lights to turn back on so he could grab his knife under the bed and kill her once and for all.
"We would've never been cool, Wicked. You scum, and I don’t associate with people like you."
"So what you gonna do now?” he asked with an attitude. She was unreasonable so why bother? “Kill me? Huh?"
"Naw," Mad laughed. "I'm going to stab you and let you bleed out slowly. Why do you think I went through all of the trouble to turn the lights out? So that I could cut your vocal cords and let you die of a slow death."
She was just about to finish him off when the lights came on. When she saw who was standing in Wicked’s doorway she blinked twice thinking that her eyes were playing tricks on her.
They weren’t.
CHAPTER 30
MAD
"Wicked, I know it's fucked up but you had it coming," Everest yelled as Wicked paced the floor of his cubby with his fists balled up. "I mean look at everything you did to her."
"This bitch just tried to kill me," he yelled as if I wasn't in the room. “Look at my neck and face! I’m the victim here remember?”
Although I was present I couldn't move. Too much was going on at the moment. What was Everest doing there? I thought she left to see the world. Why was she here trying to prevent this pussy ass nigga from telling the cops like he promised?
"Wicked, don't forget that I know about you," Everest said. “You feeling yourself right now but there isn’t a person alive who knows more about you than I do. You better remember that.”
A second ago this clown was pacing the floor like he was crazy and now he was stuck. His eyes were frozen and his arms hung at his sides. What did she know?
"So you would do that to me?” Wicked said. “You would turn your back on me after everything we’ve been through? "
"I'm just saying that what happened here just now was fucked up, but there's no need to tell the cops. You’re upset but you know you can’t tell the police about what goes on in our world. What do you think will happen if you told people she cut you? You’ll be in jail too, Wicked because of your past. And it’s not like Madjesty won’t be gone in a couple of days anyway. Just let her go in peace. There's no need to kick up shit now."
Wicked looked at me. "You lucky," he said pointing my way. “Real lucky.”
“Wicked, I had the knife at your throat and you still breathing. If anybody lucky it’s you.”
Although he was talking shit I had all intentions on finishing what I started later. Yes it was true that I was going away in a few days, but Wicked's head belonged to me and I was going to take it without any witnesses. It would just take me a little longer that’s all.
Instead of waiting on a response I walked out of his cubby and toward mine. I could hear Everest's footsteps coming behind me. Why in the fuck did I allow myself to keep falling for these janky ass bitches? These dumb ass females who didn't deserve my heart?
I pushed into my cubby and she was right there. Like she still had the right to be. "Mad, can I talk to you?"
"About what, yo," I said with my back faced in her direction.
"Yo?" she said.
"What the fuck do you want?" I continued as I moved some things around in the box in my cubby.
I don't know what I was looking for but I had to do something with my hands. I couldn't look at her face. I know if I did that she would have the power over me and I didn’t want her to have that control anymore. Not anymore.
"Mad, I'm sorry about leaving without saying anything."
I laughed. "Yeah, like always."
"What is that supposed to mean?'
I turned around and faced her. "You a runner, Everest, and I can't trust you. I'm fucked up enough as is. I don't need this mental bullshit."
"And that's why I came back. I know I'm a runner, and I don't want it to be that way anymore. You can’t begin to understand how hard this is for me."
"What the fuck does that mean?"
"I know that you’re leaving and I’m here to tell you that I want to go with you. With our heads together maybe we can have a future."
She stepped closer to me and put her hands on my arm. I pushed her back and she knocked against my cardboard wall. "Don't touch me. You don't got the right to touch me no more."
"Mad, what the fuck is wrong with you? You talking about me running and now that I'm here you want to leave. Can we stop playing games and work on a relationship? Please, baby. I have a feeling that we are so good for each other. Please let’s just give this relationship a chance."
"Everest, we tried it and it didn't work."
"That's because we were in this dump." she looked up at the dark ceiling. "I mean look at where we live. In a tunnel underground. A rat and bug infested tunnel. That doesn’t include all of the crazy people who circle us on a daily basis. How can we expect to do anything but fight down here? That's why I want a real chance at a relationship with you. Outside of The Catacombs."
I laughed. "You want a real chance so you can what? Get a place with me and roll out when you want to see the world again? I’m not a doll, Everest. I’m not a fucking toy you play with when you bored. I got feelings."
"If you give me another chance I will never leave you again, Mad. I just need one more chance. Please. Take me with you."
I looked into her light brown eyes and they seemed to sparkle. I wanted her so bad it was ridiculous. I wanted to hold her and I also wanted her love. But Everest wasn't about shit. All she wanted to do was run game on me and fuck my mind up and that wasn’t happening again.
"I'm leaving here but when I do it won’t be with you.”
I could see her throat bubble as if she swallowed something. "What about Pickles? You gonna leave him too?"
"I asked Spirit, Gage, WB and Fortune to look after him. I don’t got any room in my world for a kid." Cassius’ face flashed into my mind and I shook my head to get it out.
"So you would leave him knowing that everybody he has ever loved has abandoned him too?"
"Like I said I'm out, and I'm not letting you or anybody else get in the way of that. And, that includes Pickles."
CHAPTER 31
MAD
“Listen to me, Lil man. I’m trying to rap to you right quick,” I said to Pickles as he sat on the edge of my bed. “And I want you to understand that this is really hard for me.”
“Fuck you,” he yelled directly into my face. “You don’t like me and I don’t like you!”
The little dude never kicked it to me like that before so I can’t lie, I was kinda hurt. I hadn’t expected him to be so mad. To tell you the truth I don’t know what I expected.
"Pickles, I do like you. Why would you think like that, little man?”
"Because you leaving me by myself! You said you would never leave me.”
"But Spirit is going to be here with you,” I said looking into his eyes. “Along with Fortune and Gage, so don’t worry. You going to be good. I promise."
“But I want you with me! You my mommy!”
Maybe it was the fact that he knew I was a woman even though I never told him before. Or maybe it was the fact that he thought of me as his mother, either way I felt worse about
leaving him. I know he needs me but there’s nothing I can do about it right now. I don’t even know where I’m going to live when I get out of here. So how can I take care of him when my future is dark? Wanted murderers can’t raise kids.
“Pickles,” I said softly, “I’m not your mother, Lil man. I know I—”
“Fuck you,” he yelled with tears pouring down his face. “You gonna give up on me just like my ghost mommy! I hate you! I hate everybody!”
What is a ghost mommy?
As I watched him run out of the cubby I just sat on the edge of the bed stuck. He’s a kid and as bad as I feel for him, he doesn’t understand the real world. He’ll get over it I’m sure. He’s not my responsibility. He never was.
I know all of this is true, but why do I feel like it’s a bad idea?
I was about to go after him until I heard a loud scream in the tunnel. Whoever was crying sounded as if it came from the gut. Did something happen to Pickles?
I rushed through the tunnel, pushing and knocking niggas over in the process. I knew in that moment it was no way I was leaving him in this place alone. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself or sleep at night due to worrying about him. I had to be there for my little man and help him out. Like Mr. Nice Guy was there for me.
But I was stopped in my tracks when Spirit blocked me, holding my little nigga’s hand. It wasn’t until that point that I was able to breathe. He was safe. He was okay.
I grabbed Pickles and hugged him tightly. I could smell the scent of his musty underarms but I didn’t care. “You got it, lil’ dude. You got it,” I told him. “If I’m leaving here you coming with me too okay?”
He wrapped his little arms around my neck. “Yeah!”
I knew in that moment that I had two sons out in the world and they were going to eventually get to know each other. They were Cassius and Pickles, who’s real name I didn’t know yet.
When I released him I asked Spirit, “What happen? I heard somebody scream.”
“That’s what I was coming to tell you about.”
“Well…”
“E2 found his father in a dumpster up top. He was beat to death by some kids. It’s a good thing you getting out of here. Shit is getting bad for people like us.”
****
Everest was standing over the fire at The Pit wearing this sexy yellow shirt. I wanted to talk to her, but I knew I went off on her the last time we spoke and she wouldn’t be feeling me right now. I didn’t treat her right when she asked to leave with me and I wanted to take every terrible thing back that I said but only if she would allow me.
Instead of being a punk, I walked over to her in front of everybody. “Everest, can I talk to you for a moment?”
She rolled her eyes and focused back on the fire. “No, I’m good.” Her tone was flat and she turned her back in my direction.
I was embarrassed and looked around to see who was watching. Everyone was.
“I’ll only be a second, baby.” I stepped closer and whispered in her ear. “Please.”
She turned around to face me. “Mad, you made your decision and I’m going to respect it. So if you don’t mind I would like to be alone right now. We truly don’t have anything else to talk about.”
“So you trying to play me?”
“Fuck you,” she said stomping away. “You don’t get to hurt my feelings, make me feel worthless and then come back to me. I’m not playing your mind games anymore. If you want this thing over, then I’m going to give you exactly what you wanted. Space.”
Part of me wanted to let her bounce and never talk to her again, but I did that before and it never made me feel good. I wanted to do something I normally don’t do. Face how I felt and tell her straight up that I cared about her. Besides, losing Fierce made me realize how important life was.
I ran up to her and yanked her by the arm. “I’m sorry, Everest, but I can’t let you go this time.” She walked off and I pulled her again. “I’m sorry for how I spoke to you the other day. I know you were reaching out to me and I couldn’t hear it because I was angry. I was carrying shit like a female and I hurt you in the process. But I’m done being a kid now, Everest. I’m done hurting people and I wanna make things right. Starting with my son, Pickles and you.” She shook her head like she wasn’t hearing me. “Can we just talk about this in private? Please.”
“You just saying that.”
“No I’m not, ma. I fucking love you and I made a pussy move with how I came at you that time. I know you still love me. So give me a chance to make it right.” When she smiled I said. “Come holla at me in The Dump. I want to rap to you right quick.”
“The Dump?” she frowned. “Since when did you start wanting to go to The Dump? You hate it there.”
“Since I wanted a little privacy, and don’t feel like going up top to get it.”
“Are you serious, Mad?” She didn’t seem as angry.
“Baby, I’m dead ass. Look, I’m gonna be gone in a few days and if you want to be with me, and my man Pickles I want you to come with me up top. I can’t promise you much of a life right now, but I do know that I’m going to work my ass off trying to make things right for you. For us. The time is now for you to make the decision because I’m never coming back here.”
She looked into my eyes. “Okay,” she said kissing me on the lips. “I’m with you, and I don’t care where we go because I know we’ll be good.”
“That’s what’s up,” I said trying not to grin too hard.
Everybody cheered as we walked toward The Dump. They probably thought we were about to fuck or something. Everest giggled and threw her middle finger at everyone.
When we made it to The Dump, I picked her up and put her in the bed of the truck, which was packed with green leaves and branches. It was a little uncomfortable at first but I think we both were excited about what was about to happen.
Although I wanted to just rap to her, Everest didn’t waste anytime because she pulled her shirt off and I couldn’t get over how sexy her body was. She looked better than I ever imagined.
“How do I look?” She asked standing on her knees in front of me.
I swallowed. “Beautiful.”
“You next,” she said. “Take off your clothes.”
When she moved to touch my chest I stopped her. I didn’t like being touched and the fact that my breasts were cut off and replaced with a bad repair job didn’t help either.
“Everest, there’s something you must know about me. It didn’t matter in The Catacombs because we weren’t in a relationship. But I don’t fuck around in that way. You gonna have to be good with not feeling me, not touching my body, or we can’t make it. Maybe in time that’ll change, but not right now. Okay?
She seemed slightly disappointed. “Then what do you like?”
“To please,” I winked and then rubbed her braids. “Can I please you?”
“As long as you love me you can do whatever you want.”
We spent the next twenty minutes fucking until the truck turned on.
And that’s when my life changed.
CHAPTER 32
MAD & EVEREST
Mad and Everest laid in the back of the moving dumpster confused. To Mad's knowledge The Dump never moved so what was happening now? As they tried to conceal their bodies within the old brush, Mad’s brain kicked into overdrive. She wondered how she would protect Everest if things got violent.
“Mad, I’m scared,” Everest said loudly to be heard over the roar of the truck. “What’s going on?”
Mad would be lying if she didn’t say that she wasn’t frightened too, but she couldn’t let her know. She had to be strong. “I’m not sure but don’t talk so loud. We don’t know who these mothafuckas are or what they want. The bumps from the truck moving caused the branches inside of the bed to scratch against their arms and legs. “As soon as this bitch stops we gotta jump out okay? When I give the word be ready.”
“Okay,” Everest responded.
When the t
ruck came to a complete stop Mad was preparing to instruct Everest to leap out until she heard the voices of two men.
“What the fuck was you waiting on?” Man Number One said from outside of the truck. “You could’ve stopped and put it back there a long time ago.”
“I couldn’t do it back there. Them bums were watching.”
“Fuck I care about some bums?” Man Number One responded. “Half of them stay drunk anyway.”
When Mad heard footsteps moving toward the back of the truck, her heart rocked. Something told her they wouldn’t be happy to see her and Everest in the back since they tried to avoid them back at The Catacombs.
“Everest, put some of them brushes over your head so you can hide,” Mad whispered.”
Mad did the same thing and they both were concealed.
A second later a heavy item covered in clear plastic was thrown over top of their bodies. The large item was followed by twenty heavy cinder blocks, which provided crushing blows against their bodies. Just when things couldn’t get any worse one of the blocks smashed Everest’s arm. She placed a hand over her mouth to prevent screaming out in pain.
“Hey, did you hear something?” Man Number One said. “It sounded like it was coming from the bed of the truck.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Man Number Two responded.
“You didn’t just hear that shit?”
“Look, I put three bullets in that dead nigga’s head myself. He may do a lot of things but talking ain’t one of them. Now hurry up so we can dump this and make it to our meeting. You wasting time.”
Man Number One threw one more block on the mound, which ripped into the flesh of Mad’s head. Both she and Everest were now severely injured.
Five minutes later the truck started moving again and Mad smelled the familiar odor of rotting flesh. She’d been around enough dead bodies to be an expert on the topic. The blood from the corpse in the plastic dripped all over their bodies and dampened their face, chest and arms.