Harsh Light of Day

by Jaye A. Jones

  **

  I tried my best to match Annabelle’s casual, practically human pace as we aimlessly walked along the campus sidewalks. She was so good at acting human. Now with her satin sheet looking more like a dress, she could have been any student here and no one would know.

  At least that was how it looked to me. I knew better now. Will’s reaction to seeing my sister confirmed what Colin had told me. Humans were afraid of vampires upon first sight. Just not me.

  “I’m afraid to tell you what I need to tell you, little one.”

  I didn’t mean to laugh, but hearing Annabelle say she was afraid of anything sounded like a joke. Plus, I liked laughing, now that I realized I could.

  “You can tell me anything. We’re family.”

  “In a way…” she said. But the way she said it didn’t sound right.

  She glanced at me expectantly, but my face must not have shown the understanding she hoped.

  “I don’t understand,” I said unnecessarily, then wasn’t sure that was the right thing to say. I was always reevaluating my words and myself around Annabelle. Because I respected her. Looked up to her. Even if I didn’t want to be completely like her.

  “There is so much you should know, and we have so little time. I am not even sure you should know any of this. It is not the way things are done. But,” she trailed off for a second, her gaze far away, as if she were contemplating another time and place much different than here and now. “I care for you, and it is only right that you know some truths before you make any rash decisions.”

  “If this is about Will, I have no intention of making him like us. Even if I did, which I don’t, I don’t even know how.”

  “Still, I feel you should know some things before Colin arrives, in case there’s a choice.”

  Annabelle’s tone probably would have sounded calm and easy to a human, but I could hear the strain behind her harmless words. If nothing else, this meant a lot to her.

  “Okay,” was all I could think to say.

  We walked a few minutes in silence before Annabelle took in a deep breath and exhaled loudly. It kind of startled me.

  “I suppose there is only one place to begin,” she paused again, and I was starting to be concerned. What could possibly be this much of a secret? This private and unthinkable that it could ruffle even Annabelle’s composure?

  “Lennox is not my sire.”

  I blinked. What? I didn’t know what to say. Part of me thought I heard her wrong, but the words repeated in my head. The more it repeated, the more I didn’t understand.

  “Colin wouldn’t have gone against—”

  “No, he would not. Colin is also not my sire. I am older than Colin by at least a century. Likely more.”

  My brain refused to wrap around it. Everything I thought I knew came into question. Was anything the truth?

  “But…how?”

  Annabelle shook her head, “I chose him.”

  On some level, I always suspected female vampires weren’t capable of siring a human. Colin sure made it seem that way. But if Annabelle was telling the truth, and I didn’t know why she wouldn’t be, then that wasn’t the case.

  “Does this mean we’re not…related?” It wasn’t the right word. It wasn’t even what I really wanted to ask. But I couldn’t think of the word that would make sense, or of a better question to choose out of the hurricane in my mind.

  “We are still family, but not by blood.”

  Though I felt myself nod mechanically, I wasn’t sure what I felt. I didn’t care about Annabelle less because she was not “related” to Colin. Actually, it made me respect her a little more. But why did we feel drawn to each other? How did I know she had been calling to me earlier? And why was she only telling me this now?

  “I can see you are confused, little one. Perhaps I should start at the beginning.”

  “Please,” I whispered.

  We were at a soccer field and Annabelle led me to the metal bleachers and motioned for me to sit. She remained standing and faced me, but didn’t look at me while she explained.

  “I can only tell you the part pertaining to me. Understand, I cannot clarify any further than what I am about to tell you, so it is pointless to ask. I will not use names, and will not betray Colin’s secrets.”

  I nodded, but made a mental note that Colin had some juicy secrets. I always knew he was a big fat liar.

  And, by not using names, did that mean I knew who she was going to tell me secrets about?

  “I was sired by one of the oldest vampires. I do not remember my human life, or the year. The first place I can remember being was Hungary, but we were always on the move. He was divine to me then, my savior, my king.”

  “But you love Lennox,” I blurted, unable to believe Annabelle could have feelings for anyone other than her Lennox. They had a love all who believed in love would aspire to have. I sure wouldn’t settle for anything less. I’d rather be alone for eternity than have anything less.

  “Love,” Annabelle’s eyes danced with humor. “Such a human concept.”

  Staring at her, I wondered if she could feel my frustration. I didn’t know why she was telling me this. It was upsetting to hear her even suggest she did not love Lennox.

  Lennox was the kindest of the family and considerably more interested in more than our insignificant existence. Sometimes Lennox and I would talk about the world, and the conversations would consist of only questions that we couldn’t answer. Lennox was like my big brother. I knew his love and respect for Annabelle was eternal.

  “My sire was powerful and admired similar power in others,” she continued, ignoring my frustration if she noticed it at all. “He hoped I would inherit a great deal of his power and truly be worthy to rule at his side.”

  “But I did not develop the type of power he had hoped, so he chose a new, more promising mate and casted me aside. Understand, this was not something that happened then. Ever. It was a disgrace. I do not know how many times I begged him to kill me.”

  “I suppose, since I was his first, he harbored some affection for me. Otherwise he would have gotten rid of me immediately, like he ultimately did with his second…attempt.”

  “Eventually, he granted me a great honor. He pulled me aside, in secret, and said I could sire a consort for myself if I agreed to leave his house and join a new family, always keeping our history secret and always acting as if the human male I chose was my true sire.”

  Taking it all in, I nodded again. This made sense. Not the Annabelle being a sire part, not the Colin not being Lennox’s sire part, but the part where the mystery vamp made her promise to keep it secret. Whoever he was, he believed the rules didn’t apply to him. Even so, that didn’t mean he wanted his family to know about it. Coward.

  I’m not sure how long we were silent, wrapped up in our own thoughts. But when Annabelle spoke again, her tone was different. Even her expression looked more distant, almost wistful with affection, the way she sounded when talking to her partner.

  “Then I happened upon him. Sure, Lennox was a human, but an attractive one. He was a farm boy in Italy, and he did his chores in the sweltering midday sun as if it did not affect him. If he tired, I never saw it. Yes, I enjoyed looking at him, watching him.”

  “I was aware how odd that was. Most humans looked the same to me, slow and uninteresting. But he was glorious. His eyes were blue then too, but deeper blue and his hair was brown, only parts made golden by the sun. His skin was tan and his body was solid with long, lean muscles like a man who worked hard every day of his life. I can still feel the heat of him…”

  She’d forgotten I was there for a second. I could see it in her eyes. Looking suddenly away, I caught a glimpse of the look on her face. If she were human, she would be blushing. When she turned back, her appearance was severe, almost animalistic.

  “I turned him the traditional way. I snuck into his bedroom and
turned him there, in his parent’s house, with his brothers and sisters in the next room. I stifled his screams and forced this life on him, hating myself for it, loathing myself for the first time. But I did not know any other way.”

  “He did not know what I was doing. Why would he? But he begged for the lives of his family as he died. Begged me not to hurt them too. I felt like the demon I was. I would not say I cared for him then. Infatuated, attracted, yes. He seemed to fear me more than anything for the first years. The first decade was…” she moved her head downward slightly. If she were human, there’d be tears in her eyes.

  “It took him years to forgive me for what I took from him. But eventually he did forget.”

  I didn’t have to ask. I heard what she said. I wasn’t sure she meant to reveal the information, but Annabelle just told me that remembering your human life was typical. For every vampire. I wasn’t some freak because I remembered parts of being human. I was normal.

  Never would have guessed that.

  “But it took me many more years to forgive myself. Perhaps I still have yet to. I’ve had to endure hundreds of years knowing what I had done, and how he saw me, what he thought of me.”

  Annabelle tilted her head down again, and the cadence to her words quickened.

  “Just as Declan has had to endure the truth of your making, and you have had the luxury of forgetting. And you have hated him because of what you do not understand.”

  I didn’t know Annabelle thought I hated Declan. The thought of it sent a cold sensation down my spine.

  “Give it time, little one. You will forget, and forgive. Please, do not be hasty with this human. If you turn him, there is no going back. Colin will bring Charles into it if you do, and Charles will kill you both mercilessly. And enjoy doing it.”

  “That’s what all this was about? You’re telling me to go back to Declan?”

  “Yes,” she said abruptly and was gone.

  Annabelle left me there and walked into the night without another word. I should have known what she was doing all along. After all, she was just my protective sister telling me to come home.