Before I Fell

by Brandy Greeley

  Hades paused a second, assessing his reaction, before reaching out for me, transporting us back to the Underworld. I breathed in the familiar scents and sights nanoseconds before his lips bruised mine, pushing me back onto a nearby chaise lounge as he covered my body with his, holding me in place and scoring my neck with his teeth as I felt my back arch involuntarily.

  “That’s one hell of a welcome home,” I said minutes later as he kissed me once more.

  “This habit of separating you from me needs to end, love. It’s taking a toll on me, a helpless feeling that I can’t control.” He smoothed my hair back from my forehead as I watched firelight dance across the walls and ceiling.

  “Well, at least now I know you were lying to Kronos. Speaking of which, what happened with Persephone?”

  “She has to kill her best friend to break the curse.”

  “What?” I twisted in his arms as he smiled grimly. “It’s a new condition the Fates doled out, in exchange for her help in restoring the balance to the Underworld. Something tells me she’s not going to be in a rush to come back here after that, even for me.”

  I slid off the couch, pacing in front of him as he righted his clothes, standing too.

  “So the Fates have a twisted sense of humor. So what? Once she remembers everything, she’ll come home, because despite what you did to her, she loves you.” I picked at a fingernail, staring into the flames of the fire. “Which is why I can’t be here when she does.”

  “Emma-”

  “No, Hades. Please don’t fight me on this. When she comes back, you’re going to need space to rediscover your relationship, and what it looks like now. I can’t be here while you’re busy doing that, because it would hurt too much.”

  He lay a hand on my arm. “You’re my soulmate.”

  “You say that like I’m going to forget it. I know what I am to you, but there’s not enough space here for both your wife and soulmate. I’m not going to put you-or her-in the position of having to choose between us.”

  “So, what do you want? To go home?”

  I laughed, rolling my eyes sideways at him. “Uh, yeah. As soon as possible, too.”

  He clenched his jaw, eyes narrowing. “I’m not going to authorize that.”

  “Awe, C'mon, Hades! Just send me away until she’s settled here and then I’ll work for the two of you again, like last time. It’ll be like nothing happened.”

  “Are you forgetting about the souls, or the Furies, both of whom are waiting anxiously for you to make a mistake, so they can take advantage of you and hurt you to get to me?”

  “The only way you're ever going to stop that from happening is if I’m never allowed out of your sight again, something which is completely out of the question.”

  “And what about the promise you made to me twice? Does that mean nothing to you?”

  Shoot. Yes, I did forget about that. Well, hell.

  I smiled sweetly, tucking my hands behind my back as he watched me like I was a snake about to strike.

  “Hades, with Persephone potentially coming home soon, I don’t think now is the appropriate time to focus on that.”

  “No, it’s the perfect time,” he said, crossing to the bar. “If she comes home, it means she’s no longer a death goddess, which means that she can’t help me with the spirit load-only you can. I need you to be ready to pick up that slack.”

  “I really don’t want to-”

  “I’m not asking. I’m ordering.”

  I sighed heavily as he held out a wine glass to me. “Fine. But if you ever tell Persephone what’ happened between us, I’ll smash your brains in.”

  He smiled. “Noted. Now, I would suggest that we start as soon as you’re ready because-”

  “Hey, guys.”

  I glanced up as Poseidon sauntered into the room, Amphitrite in tow.

  “Hold my glass,” I said to Hades as I marched over to them, rearing back and punching Poseidon square in the nose. He howled and buckled to the floor, trying to stem the flow of blood as I smirked and rejoined Hades, taking a sip of my drink. “That’s for kidnapping me, you stupid asshole.”

  Amphitrite helped him up, glaring at me. “Was that really necessary?”

  “Yup.”

  “He did what he did to rescue me and now you’re going to punish him for it?”

  “Look, Amphy-can I call you that? He used me to get what he wanted, despite my warnings and protests. He could’ve figured out another way to get you without involving me and now, thanks to him, I almost became Queen of Hell and bargained away some of Hades’ power over Kronos.”

  “So, you won’t help someone unless it benefits you in return?”

  “The line between ‘help’ and ‘human trafficking’ is pretty clear.”

  “Stop it, both of you.” Poseidon tucked a bloody handkerchief into his back pocket. “Emma, I’m sorry for what I did, but if I could do it over, I would.”

  “Is that supposed to be an apology?” I snarled, grabbing the decanter as Hades gingerly took both it and my glass from me, setting them aside.

  “Bringing Emma to Tartarus wasn’t a smart move, brother. She could’ve been hurt or killed in the process.”

  “I didn’t have another option brother. Besides, Kronos wouldn’t’ve killed her, not when he realized what she could do.”

  “That wasn’t your decision to make! Gods alive, Poseidon, since when did we take free will away from mortals?”

  “Since you let that mortal intrude into our family business,” he said, gesturing to me. “The only reason she’s allowed to live in both worlds at all is that you lack the balls to make her immortal like the rest of us. How long are you going to continue to protect her against every imagined threat before you realize how fragile she is?”

  “I can take care of myself, thank you very much,” I said, glowering back as he sent me a long-suffering glance that I itched to smack off his face.

  “She’s a liability as long as you refuse to acknowledge this fact. And I won’t be the last god to ask for favors.”

  “Did it ever occur to you that I may have already tried to convince her to become immortal?” Hades asked, laying a hand on my shoulder.

  “Don’t try-just do it.”

  “Woah wait a damn second,” I said, starting towards him. “No one has the right to do that without my permission. He offered, I refused. End of story.”

  “And, suppose that I did it-took that choice away from her. She would never forgive me for it,” Hades said, stroking his lip in thought.

  “But she’d be safe.”

  “Guys, I’m standing right here, and I say hell no to this plan of yours,” I said, waving my hands in front of me uselessly.

  A parade of emotions crossed Hades’ face as he stoically ignored me, the two men staring each other down.

  “She’s rather obstinate, foolhardy, persistent-”

  “Impatient, judgmental and, right now, pissed off,” I said as Hades blinked, looking down at me.

  “I’m sorry, Emma, but it pains me to say that Poseidon has a point. If you were immortal, the Furies couldn’t hurt you and the souls couldn’t overwhelm you to a lethal level. This might be the best option you have.”

  “Are we really going to revisit this conversation right now? Why don’t I just pack up everything I own, break up with Sam and move here permanently, huh? Then we could all be one big, happy family.”

  I jumped when Poseidon roared with laughter. “Wait, you have a boyfriend on the side? Oh, that’s rich. How did Mr. Mean and Scary here react?”

  “Jealous and moody, like always. Sam might not believe that I can do what I say I can do, but he’s been trying lately, for me. But, back on topic. When I say that I don’t want to do something, please listen, because nine times out of ten, I’m dead serio-”

  “You told him?” Hades’ nostrils flared as he glared at me and I held up my hands in supplication against the tidal wave of anger I could feel seeping from every pore.

  “B
ack off, alright? He doesn’t know about you, or the Underworld, or my connection to it all, and even if he did, as I said before, he wouldn’t believe a word of it. But I like having someone on the outside that I can be myself around. I want the chance to live a normal life, remember? Things like having a husband and kids someday. Maybe not with him, per se, but with someone who isn’t already married and who I don’t have to hide things from.”

  “Normalcy vanished for you the second you walked through my front door, remember?” Hades hissed, and I flipped him off as he arched an eyebrow in warning.

  “Well, that message came through loud and clear! If you won’t take our very generous offer of help,” Poseidon said to me, tucking Amphitrite’s arm through his, “some advice, maybe. You’re far too smart to think that you can do this all alone, despite your behavior now, and not smart enough to realize how much you need the assistance. Just think it through, alright? It would be better knowing that you couldn’t be killed, no matter what kinds of shenanigans we devise for you.”

  “I don’t care.”

  “And maybe that’s true, and maybe it’s not, but I do know this: you panicked when you thought about what Kronos could’ve done to you, didn’t you? And you’ll continue to feel that way every single time you’re in a position where your life could be in danger. I’m not sure how much longer Hades will put up with that, but my guess is not long.”

  He saluted us, disappearing and I hesitated a moment before marching from the room.

  “I need you to stay here for a while,” Hades said, following me out.

  “Fine.”

  “If any of my siblings approach you with a task, come to me and I’ll take care of it.”

  “Fine.”

  “We start training first thing tomorrow morning.”

  I huffed out a frustrated breath as I whirled to face him.

  “Fine. Is there anything else, or can I go to bed now? It’s been the longest day ever and I’d love nothing more than to put it all behind me.”

  He reached out tentatively, stroking a finger along my jaw. “You seem angry.”

  “Gee, I wonder why.” I moved to brush past him, but he stepped in my path, blocking me.

  “You know I couldn’t stop Poseidon from taking you to Tartarus.”

  “I know, but it doesn’t change how livid I am with you right now.”

  “Me? Why?”

  “You’re kidding, right? For about five minutes, you actually considered doing it-taking Poseidon’s advice and making me immortal despite all your talk about free will. Don’t deny it, either, because I saw it in your eyes. It’s exactly the same look Hera gave me the night of the party when I told her that you took my gifts away. There’d be no consequence for your actions, either-no twinges of guilt as you saddled me to Olympus and the Underworld for the rest of eternity. But I don’t want that, Hades-I never did. Teach me to protect myself against the souls, and you won’t ever have to worry about keeping me safe, except maybe from your maniac brother, who I don’t like.”

  The ghost of a smile lifted his lips as he watched me. “Our training will be more intense this time around.”

  “Okay.”

  “There are some tips and tricks I want to teach you, but you have to be open to them.”

  “That’s fine.”

  “And I want you to start coming with me to the docks for two hours each morning.”

  I felt my mouth pop open, breath quickening. “No, Hades. Just…no. That’s not a good idea. A majority of those souls are angry, spiteful and-”

  “Borderline evil. Yes, I know, which is why I think it’s the perfect setting for you to learn in. Because if you go back to Portland, and the souls overwhelm you again, you need to know how to fend them off.”

  “If I go back?” I folded my arms across my chest, giving him a steely-eyed glare. “I wasn’t aware that by agreeing to be here, I was forfeiting my freedom again.”

  He blinked, confused. “You’re not.”

  “When you go back would’ve been a more appropriate thing to say, Hades. One is conditional, the other given.”

  “Your return to Portland is conditional on the progress of your training, Emma. I’m not sending you back until I know that you’re thoroughly ready for it and considering the length of time since your last session, it could take us a while to get to a level that I’m satisfied with.”

  “Yay,” I muttered, looking up at him unhappily.

  “This is for your benefit, never forget that. I had Hermes move your things into my room. I’ll join you there shortly.”

  “But I don’t want to sleep there with you-I have my own room.”

  “Per our agreement, you’re required to stay with me while you’re here. Or did you forget about that stipulation, too?”

  “No, I didn’t forget.”

  Yes, I did, just like everything else he said while I was desperate to leave Tartarus.

  “You know I can hear you now, right?” Hades asked eyebrow raised.

  “I just figured, since so much has happened the past twenty-four hours, that you’d understand my need for space.”

  “It’s because of everything that’s happened that I need you to stay near me. This isn’t a punishment, Emma.” He faded from view, whistling, and I flipped him off again, not because I needed to but purely for the satisfaction, I felt in the action, climbing the staircase one step at a time as exhaustion pressed itself down on me. I collapsed into his massive bed and let sleep claim me.

  Chapter Fourteen

  The Underworld, one month later

  “You did well today,” Hades said as I climbed into bed, reaching for my Kindle. He placed a bookmark between the pages of a thickly-bound book.

  “Well enough to go to Portland?”

  “No.”

  “That’s what I thought.”

  He reached out, grabbing my chin as he turned my face towards his. “I’m sorry that you even have to ask anymore, Emma.”

  “Just admit it, Hades, you’re glad that I’m here, and faking sincerity won’t earn you brownie points with me right now. Just give up.”

  I tore my face from his grip, flipping through my library to find the book I wanted and after a minute he turned away, too, though I could still feel his eyes on me.

  “Milord-oh.” A man skids to a halt just inside the bedroom door, out of breath, eyes bright-excited.

  “Yes, what is it?” Hades asked, absentmindedly sliding a finger under the strap of my tank top.

  “It’s Persephone, milord. She’s…returned.”

  “What? Are you sure?” He tossed the covers off, reaching for his pants and shirt and I carefully slid out as well, lip trembling as I reached for my luggage.

  I knew this day would come sooner or later, but damn if it didn’t hurt, just a little bit.

  “Sure that the woman entering with Nicholas just now bears a striking resemblance to your wife? Yes, I am.”

  Hades beamed from ear to ear, striding purposefully towards the door. He stopped abruptly when he noticed me, leaning against a bedpost, gaze canvassing the room for anything I might’ve forgotten. Bailey loved the floor in here, but my room was equally comfortable, too, in its own way.

  “Aren’t you coming to see her?”

  “No, you go ahead without me. This is one reunion you should probably make alone.”

  “Emma-” He reached out for me, expression fierce, determined and joyous and I smiled, shaking my head as I stepped past him into the hallway, dog in tow.

  “It’s alright, Hades, I understand. Please have Magda prepare my room for me on your way down. I don’t know how to light that stupid fireplace myself.”

  “See you-” He licked his lips, seeming uncharacteristically out of sorts. “See you for breakfast?”

  The way I saw it, I had two options.

  I could tell him to ‘get dead’ and spend all of the next day and day afterward wallowing in my room or I could suck it up and stop pretending like I had any rights to him w
hatsoever. I wasn’t his and the sooner I admitted that to myself, the better off I was.

  “Yeah, I’ll be there. Don’t eat all the waffles this time, okay?”

  He nodded and left as I made my way to my room, retracing the familiar steps I’d taken a month earlier, had it already been an entire month? Thinking back to all the fireside dinners and late-night cuddles as night flickered back to dawn. He’s not mine, even as I stilled, flinching when laughter reached my ears. I felt a weird sort of pulse vibrate its way through me and knew immediately what it was. The curse breaking. Which meant…

  “Oh, hell no.” I pushed the door open and sighed, setting my things down as the souls in there snapped to attention like a dog on a bone. “I thought I was done for today.”

  “We couldn’t find the death goddess, so we came to you,” a man closest to me said and I nodded, standing in front of the line.

  “And you won’t, because she’s not a death goddess anymore. Well, let’s get this over with because I need to sleep.”

  “You can do this, Emma. You’re a strong, independent woman who doesn’t need anyone else to make you happy. Chin up.” I tore my gaze from the bathroom mirror, adjusting the lace camisole and pencil skirt as I briefly considered taking breakfast in my room.

  Stop being such a chicken. They won’t bite. Besides, you have nothing to be ashamed of. Not really.

  All those nights and days wrapped in Hades’ arms…

  He’s a full-grown man who made his own decisions. If she’s going to kill anyone for it, it’ll be him, not you. IF he tells her. Oh, goddess, please don’t let him do that.

  I paused outside the dining room, squaring my shoulders when voices drifted to me, as well as laughter and passionate moans.

  Yuck. Is it too late to turn back?

  “Good morning.” I entered, eyes flicking to my usual chair-the one I’d called my own the past two and a half years-now occupied.

  Persephone stood, embracing me in a hug so tight, I thought my ribs were going to crack.

  “Emma.”

  The recognition in her voice made my throat close as I blinked furiously against the swell of tears, taking a seat across from her as she smiled gaily at me. Her curly hair cascaded down her bare shoulders, flowing over the rose-print dress she wore. She looked beautiful-regal-just like a goddess should look, and I clenched my fork as I looked down at the table in front of me, trying my best to get a handle on the wild and crazy emotions clashing themselves together in my gut.