by Lori Wick
she did that morning. She'd been sitting in Gladys' backyard since 5:30, a small bag of clothes beside her. Mosquitoes buzzed around and even landed to bite, but other than giving an occasional swat, Sophie did not notice them.
She glanced at her watch for the umpteenth time and saw finally that it was after 7:00. Her bag and purse gripped in one hand, she rose with more grace than she felt and moved around the house toward the front door. It was not at all surprising that Gladys was still in her robe, but Sophie knew that she hadn't wakened her.
"Why, Sophie, you're out early." Her voice was surprised, but not unwelcoming.
"Yes, Gladys. Some time ago you said I could maybe use your house in the basement. Do you still have offer?"
The fact that Sophie's English had deserted her told Gladys more than her words did.
"Certainly, Sophie. Come right in."
Sophie moved stiffly forward. Once in the entryway of Gladys' home, she thought she would relax, but the back of her neck was beginning to ache with the rigid way she held herself.
"Have you had breakfast, Sophie?"
"No, but I will not wish to be burden."
"I'll tell you if you are. Why don't you head downstairs and get settled in? When you get back, I'll make some toast for you. I can't remember, Sophie-do you take your coffee black?"
"With cream," Sophie said, and for some reason tears rushed to her eyes. Someone could shout at her right now, and she would put her chin in the air. Gladys' tenderness she could not handle.
Gladys didn't comment but saw her to the basement door and moved back into the kitchen. She stood by the table and prayed. Sophie's face had been so pale and her eyes looked as if something tragic had occurred. Things like death and houses on fire ran through Gladys' mind, but she dismissed them. Whatever this was, it was a matter of the heart. Gladys could only speculate as to what might have happened, but most assuredly it had something to do with Alec Riley. There could be no other reason for Sophie wanting to leave her home.
Footsteps on the stairs reminded Gladys that she hadn't done a thing about breakfast, so when Sophie entered the kitchen she was working on the coffee. Sophie sat at the kitchen table. She was not accustomed to being waited on, but she suddenly felt very shaky.
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"What room did you choose?"
"The one in the corner, with two windows."
"That's my favorite, too."
"It will not be long, Gladys. I will find a place."
Gladys turned to look at her. "Don't worry about it, Sophie. You're quite welcome here."
Sophie nodded, but did not speak. Gladys put a wonderful meal on the table and kept the conversation light. Sophie was able to eat, but excused herself not long after she was through. She was very tired, and the bed in her room downstairs looked inviting. She started to read her Bible, but could not keep her eyes open. She slept until just before noon.
***
"Hello."
"Hi, Craig," Alec said when his son answered the phone.
"Oh, hi, Dad."
"How's everything going?"
"All right. Rita's lying outside with a book, and Tory's writing a letter or something."
"Okay." Alec hesitated and then said quietly, "Have you heard from Sophie?"
"No." Craig's voice now turned confused. "Was she supposed to call?"
"No, I just hoped."
Silence stretched between them for a moment, and then Craig said. "I thought you talked to her, and she decided to take the day off."
Alec wished he had kept his mouth shut. "No, Craig. There was a note on the table that said she wouldn't be down. After last night it was rather abrupt, and I didn't want anyone upset."
"So you haven't talked to her at all."
"No."
"Well, what if something's happened to her?"
"I thought of that, Craig, but she did leave a note."
"Oh, yeah."
"Listen, I'll try to get done early so we can talk tonight. Do the girls seem all right?"
"Yeah. I haven't said anything to them."
"Okay. I'll see you tonight."
"It's all my fault, isn't it, Dad?"
"You mean that she's taken the day off?"
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"Right."
"No, Craig, it isn't. I was the one who rushed her."
Again they fell silent, but for only a moment.
"Are you going to be all right?"
"Yes," Craig said, his voice now sounding normal. "I'll see you later."
"Okay."
They said their good-byes, each anticipating their talk that night; unfortunately, it made the afternoon seem long. Alec was home just after 5:00, but he felt like he'd left days ago. Rita, who had given little thought to Sophie's day off, since she really believed that Sophie deserved a life of her own, now began to wonder if the housekeeper's absence might be the reason her father seemed preoccupied at supper. He never failed to thank his daughter when she cooked something, but tonight he barely noticed what was on the table.
When the meal was almost over, the phone rang; it was for Tory. Alec only half listened to what was being said until Tory called his name.
"Dad, Crystal wants me to spend the night."
Alec barely managed to keep the surprise off his face. "I think that would be all right, Tory. I mean, as long as you feel good about it."
Tory nodded, her eyes shining.
"Have at it," Alec grinned at her, thinking how far she'd come.
"He said okay, Crystal. Uh-huh. All right. Yeah, I'll bring it. Okay. See you then."
The phone was replaced.
"Her dad's going to come for me in half an hour, and they want me to stay all day tomorrow." Her young voice was filled with excitement.
"You better go pack your gear. I'll see to your dishes."
"Thanks, Dad," she called and charged from the room. Alec spoke when the sound of her footsteps had died away.
"I wanted to talk to all three of you kids tonight, but maybe this is best."
Rita stared at her father and then at Craig; it wasn't hard to figure. "About why Sophie was gone today?"
"Yes. Help me with the dishes, and we'll talk when Tory leaves."
The dishes were done in near silence, since an air of expected doom hung over everyone. Alec didn't want them to feel this way, but at the moment he couldn't think how to ease the situation.
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Mr. Calkins came about 45 minutes later, and Alec watched for signs that Tory had changed her mind. He saw none. In her enthusiasm, she nearly forgot to kiss him good-bye before she ran off to the Calkinses' car without a backward glance.
"This is a first, Larry, so I don't know what you should expect."
Crystal's father nodded in complete understanding. "Crystal has assured Tory that she would be allowed to call you no matter the time or go home, even if it was the middle of the night."
"Thanks, Larry. Knowing all of that, she'll probably be fine."
Mr. Calkins took his leave then. When Alec came in from the front porch, he found Rita and Craig waiting for him in the living room. This room was more formal than the family room, so he was a little surprised, but they both looked ready for whatever he had to say. Alec made himself sit down and start immediately.
"I think you both know that I've had strong feelings for Sophie for some time now." He waited until they nodded and then continued. "However, I haven't felt until recently that I could pursue anything with her. When I finally did make a move, I moved too swiftly."
"Is that why she wasn't here today?" Rita wished to know.
"Yes," Alec told her with regret, hoping his oldest wouldn't ask for details.
"Where was she all day?"
"I don't know, Rita. She left a note saying she wouldn't be down, but she didn't say where she was headed."
"Or if she was coming back," Craig inserted quietly.
Alec nodded, his look weary and anxious. "I don't think she's gone for good. That is, I really beli
eve that I'll be able to talk to her again. But before I do, I need to know how you feel. I would like very much to get to know Sophie better, but not if you're against it."
They were quiet for so long that Alec knew he was going to have to take things one question at a time.
"Okay, let me ask you this: How do you feel about Sophie working here?"
"It's fine," Craig said.
"Yeah," Rita agreed. "I can't imagine life without her right now."
"Okay. Now, how do you feel about my dating Sophie?"
Craig did not find this one so easy to answer. Rita had no problem with it, but feared to say this before Craig had his say.
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"It feels kind of funny," he admitted, and then looked at his father again. Emotions surged through him and tears flooded his eyes. For once he did nothing to hide them. "I think it might be kind of weird, I mean," he sniffed but kept on. "She's been our housekeeper, but she's been more than that. Why should you-" He had to stop for a moment, and then he went on in a very measured voice. He knew he sounded as confused as he felt. "Rita, Tory, and I are all going to grow up and find someone to marry. Why should you be alone? I can't say as the idea won't take some getting used to, but if you want to date Sophie, I think you should."
"You're sure, Craig. I don't want you angry and then hiding it."
"I'm not angry. It's just been so comfortable the way it is. If you start holding Sophie's hand and kissing her, well, I just don't-"
Alec laughed a little. "I think you're being a bit premature. Sophie hasn't agreed to anything. And even if she did, Craig, I don't want to rush this."
He nodded, and Alec felt free to turn to Rita. She, too, had tears in her eyes, but she spoke with calm assurance.
"I hope you marry her," she nearly whispered as the tears ran down her face. "I hope you fall so far in love that you never hurt over Mom again. And I hope that she loves you back until you're both old and gray."
It was too much for Alec. His hands came to his eyes and sobs racked his frame. Never ashamed of their father's tears, the kids came and put their arms around him. He cried as he thanked them and told them how much he loved them both. The tears continued as he told them that they meant more than anything. If they didn't want this, they only had to say so.
God moved in Craig's heart, and he ended up encouraging his father to follow his heart. Rita offered to talk with Tory about it, but Alec actually laughed and reminded them that he hadn't even talked to Sophie.
"Talk to her soon, Dad."
"I will, Rita. I hope to tonight when she comes in."
Craig nodded with satisfaction. It might seem strange at first, but he could see it was going to be all right. It was a little funny that, after all his hesitancy, it never even occurred to him that Sophie would turn his father down.
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IT WAS 9:15 AND SOPHIE WAS STILL NOT HOME. Alec was certain of this since he'd walked to the door of the kitchen and looked up the stairway to the apartment every few minutes for the last two hours. Several times he told himself that he missed her, so he walked up and knocked, but she did not answer her door. It was dark by the time he decided to go look for her. It wasn't what you'd call a search, since he was only going to one place, but he could no longer stay still. Rita had just popped a bowlful of popcorn and settled down in front of a movie, so he explained to her.
"Will you be gone long?"
"I don't know."
"Do you want me to come?"
"No. Craig's in his room and might not hear the phone should Tory call. The keys to the truck are in the kitchen."
"Right. I'll take care of everything until you get back."
Alec could have used a run, especially since he wasn't going that far, but the mosquitoes were thick right now. He opted for the van. Letting the air conditioner blow on him, he sat for a moment and prayed.
I will have to sleep tonight, Lord, whether or not I know where she is. I need to trust You for this, but I want to see her so much. Maybe she won't be where I'm headed, but please let her be home when I return. And most of all, let me rest in You.
Alec had no assurance that he would see Sophie tonight, but he forced his mind to verses that assured him that God was there for both of them and perfect peace could be found in Him alone. He sang songs of praise as he backed from the garage and started down the street. He asked himself all types of questions, from whether he had a right to approach Sophie like this, to whether or not he was ready to risk love again.
Before he had any answers, he was in front of the Nickelberry home. He had done some work on this house years ago and knew that there was a finished basement with an outside entrance.
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The upstairs was still lit up, but so was a window at the side of the house on the basement level. Alec walked along the path that led down to the backyard and the exposed lower level. He spotted Sophie through the sheer curtain and for just a moment stood and watched her. She was half lying on the sofa, a book in her hands. She couldn't have had any clue to his arrival since she lay completely relaxed. With a prayer for wisdom, Alec walked up and knocked at the door. A moment later the outside light came on and Sophie peeked out. She opened the door slowly, and Alec stepped in. Sophie stood back as soon as she had shut the door, and they stared at each other.
"How are children?" Sophie managed at last.
"They're fine. Tory's actually spending the night at Crystal's."
"This is good."
"Yes," Alec agreed inanely, making his eyes glance around the room when all he wanted to do was stare at the woman he loved.
"Please sit down." Sophie remembered her manners and let her eyes caress him as he moved in front of her. His back was so broad, but tonight he looked tired and beaten down as he sat in the chair. Sophie wanted to bury her face against the crisp cotton of his shirt and sob.
"Would you like cold-" She stopped and started over. "Would you likeacold drink?"
"That sounds good."
Alec wasn't at all thirsty, but he needed to do something with his hands. His eyes followed Sophie much the way hers had followed him, and he thought she looked tired, too.
We belong together, Sophie. We're both hurting and tired because we belong together and it hasn't happened yet.
"Thank you," Alec spoke softly when Sophie handed him a tall glass filled with ice and root beer. It was not lost on him that it was his favorite. She was such a wonderful caregiver to those in her world. Suddenly, Alec had an overwhelming desire to be loved and cherished by her. He wasn't quite sure what to do with this feeling, so he took a long drink. Sophie, who had sat on the sofa, watched the muscles in his neck as he drank, and then turned her face away. Alec noticed the action and felt defeat wash over him. He slowly lowered the glass.
"I really blew it, didn't I, Sophie?"
She now looked at him for a long moment.
"Who did you kiss?" she asked softly.
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Alec's brow drew down into a frown. Who did he kiss? He had kissed her. What in the world could she mean? For the first time he felt frustrated with their language barrier, and then told himself he hadn't heard her right.
"Who did I kiss?"
"Yes." The short word held all the pain Sophie felt inside. "What woman did you hold in your arms and kiss with your lips? Who was it?"
Her meaning hit Alec so suddenly that for an instant he was robbed of breath. He set his glass aside and joined Sophie on the couch. She moved away slightly, so Alec didn't reach for her hand as he longed to do. Sophie only eyed him warily, trying to gauge his response.
"I wouldn't do that to you," he said.
Sophie looked uncomfortably at the floor, sorry she had even mentioned it. "It would be understanding."
"I guess it would be, but that's not what happened."
She still hadn't looked at him, but spoke anyway.
"Sophie does not want other woman's embraces."
"I realize that, and I swear to you I did not hold yo
u and dream of Vanessa."
She did not respond at all this time, and Alec saw how deeply she was hurting. The kiss had not been unwelcome as long as it washerkiss, and not another woman's.
"Sophie," Alec said her name in a way that commanded her attention. She looked up into his eyes. "Give me your hand."
Sophie did so tentatively, and Alec pulled her a little closer. He then placed her hand flat on his chest. Sophie watched what he was doing until she felt his heart. Her eyes flew to his in alarm, and he whispered, "It's you who makes my heart beat like that, Sophie. Just you. It was you I held in my arms and kissed, and it's you I want to get to know. It's you alone that I've thought about all day, and feared I would never see again because I acted too hastily. It's you, Sophia Velikonja, who makes my heart slam in my chest whenever you're in the room."
Sophie took her hand from his chest and covered her mouth, but tears still filled her eyes. "I thought I was substitute."
"No, Sophie." Alec's heart nearly broke. "I would never do that."
More tears came, and Alec put his arms around her. Sophie cried against him for just a minute and then pulled away. His arms had been so nice and his care of her was so tender, but she must be careful with herself. She was not his wife.
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"I am sorry I ran away," she sniffed a little. "But I did not know what to do."
"I understand. I shouldn't have kissed you. It was too soon."
Sophie looked at him. "Too soon?"
"Yes," he answered, his eyes dark with intensity. "I want to know you better, Sophie. If you don't want that, now is the time to say so because I'm going to be coming after you."
His words thrilled and frightened her all at the same time.
"I am not move too fast."
"I won't rush you, but I won't ignore you either."
Sophie looked at his eyes as they watched her intently.
"What about the children?"
"Tory doesn't know, but Rita and Craig have already given their blessing."
Sophie was shocked speechless. They had talked about her! Alec had discussed this with his children, and they had accepted the situation.
"What did I say wrong?"
"Oh, nothing. I am just surprise."
"Surprised."
"Yes, surprised. This is word. I did not think they would ever want this, I mean, if you and I see each other in personal way." Sophie was proud of how logical she sounded when it felt as if her world had tipped a little on its axis.