Rowan

by MarieRochelle

  “I know you are, but I can’t ignore the contract I signed. As long as we fulfill our part of the deal, Rowan can’t come back and sue us for anything later. Please, do this for me. Not him, but for me.”

  “Alright, I’ll do it, but I will be back home on the first flight I can get after I’m done,” Danya told her.

  “Thank you, Danya.” Akayie gave her friend a quick hug before going back over to her suitcase and picking it up. She continued down the hallway and seconds later the front door slammed shut behind her.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Rolling over in his bed, Rowan could barely open his eyes for the pounding going on behind them. It felt like a family of woodpeckers had moved into his head. He slowly opened his eyes and shut them quickly as the bright sunlight from his window only made thing worse.

  What in the hell happened last night? Why did his mouth feel like dry sand? He could barely remember anything at all after he got home from his date with Akayie. He had to get out of bed and find out what was going on. He had never remembered getting this drunk before. He had hangovers before, but nothing like this.

  Taking a deep breath, Rowan slowly blinked as the sun hit him directly in the face again. Shit, he had to take a shower and wash off the effects of the liquor. How much did he have to drink? He didn’t even remember getting into the bed last night. Sitting up, he swung his legs over the edge of the bed and winced as lightning pain shot through his skull.

  “Fuck,” he cursed, dropping his head into his hands. He wouldn’t be much help to his men or anyone else today if he didn’t find a way to clear his mind. First things first. He glanced down and realized he was wearing the same clothes from last night. He glanced around the room and noticed that he didn’t see any signs of Akayie at all.

  Shit! Had he gotten so drunk on her last night that she spent the night in her room instead of his? Well, he would find her and apologize after a hot shower and changing into a fresh shirt and jeans. Getting up off the bed, he slowly made his way into the bathroom, cursing his stupidity every step of the way. He promised himself never to do something so idiotic again. He liked for his mind to be sharp and on point, but this morning he could barely think. So, how was he supposed to run the ranch and get everything done like usual? If he only he could recall what made him get this stinking drunk in the first place, he would make sure to never do it again.

  * * * *

  Morgan took a sip of his coffee as he glanced out the kitchen window at Rowan’s men going on about their day. He was so damn glad none of them had been around to witness or hear how Rowan lashed out at Akayie last night. His big brother might have lost half, if not all, of his employees since most of the men had grown quite fond of Akayie over the last several weeks. He still couldn’t believe his brother’s cruel words. As much as he had tried talking Akayie out of leaving the ranch, she wasn’t having it. She was going to find a way to leave even if she had to walk all the way to the airport in the dead of night.

  He didn’t know how much Rowan remembered after drinking an entire bottle of whiskey. He had been so scared for Rowan that he stayed over to make sure nothing happened to him. He was just about to go upstairs and check on him until he heard the shower come on.

  “Where is he?”

  Turning, Rowan found an angry Danya carrying a camera case in her left hand. He knew that she would have been right on the plane beside Akayie if her boss hadn’t made her promise to stay and take the last pictures of Tanner for the calendar. His little brother was due at the ranch in less than an hour, and they were going on the opposite side of the property to keep him and Rowan away from each other since the two siblings weren’t on speaking terms.

  “Who are you talking about?” he asked, watching closely as Danya’s eyes narrowed at him.

  “Don’t play stupid with me,” she snapped. “You know I’m talking about your brother.”

  He shrugged. “I haven’t seen Lucas at all this morning on the ranch. I think he’s at work.”

  “You know damn well I’m not taking about Lucas. I’m referring to the bastard that made my best friend run out of here in tears. She didn’t tell me what happened, but I’m not leaving this room until you tell me. What in the hell did he do to her?”

  Damn it. Morgan hated that Rowan’s anger and jealousy had placed him in the middle of all of this. But, he couldn’t tell Danya anything until he had to chance to talk with Rowan and figure out how his brother was going to fix things with Akayie.

  “I’m sorry, but I can’t tell you anything about last night. I came upon Akayie after everything had happened and she was crying,” he lied.

  “You’re lying. I know you were there. Something happened that involved you and Akayie, didn’t it? Rowan got angry about something the two of you did. I know Akayie was falling in love with Rowan. Did you come on to her and Rowan caught the two of you together? Did he put the blame on her and that is why she left in tears? Are you the cause of all of this happening?”

  Not in the way you think.

  “No, I’m not,” Morgan answered. “Will you please go and get ready for Tanner’s pictures? Isn’t that the reason Akayie pleaded with you to stay here? Do you not want her to finish the contract she signed? She left a lot of responsibility on you because she thought you could handle it. Was she wrong?”

  Danya’s light brown eyes flashed at him before she blew out a deep breath. “No, Akayie wasn’t wrong. She needs me to be there for her and I will, but I will find out what happened last night and that is a promise.” She gave him another hard glare before spinning on her heel and storming out of the room.

  Morgan whistled. He was surely glad that Rowan hadn’t made it downstairs yet because he might not have been able to protect him from Danya. She cared for her best friend a lot, and if she ever found out the truth about what Rowan had said she would make sure there wasn’t a chance in hell of his brother ever finding a way back into her boss’ life.

  Pivoting, Morgan continued staring out the kitchen window waiting for Rowan to finally come downstairs. He wasn’t sure how long he stood there before he heard his brother’s booted footsteps making their way into the kitchen. He glanced over his shoulder, taking in Rowan’s hungover appearance even after he took a hot shower and changed his clothes. After getting his cup of coffee, Rowan pulled out a chair and took a seat at the kitchen table.

  “Well, I’m surprised to see you up this morning after the night you had,” Morgan snapped.

  Taken back by the hostility in Morgan’s voice, Rowan sat up straighter, placing his coffee cup on the table. “God, what is wrong with you this morning?” he asked, massaging his temples. “I pray this headache doesn’t last all day.”

  “How in the hell can you be sitting there like that, especially after what you did?”

  Dropping his hand away from his head, Rowan’s eyes bored into his. “What the fuck are you talking about? I haven’t done anything but get on a drunk that I’m regretting this morning. Hell, I woke up still wearing last night’s clothes. What do you have to be pissed about, early as it is?”

  “Are you honestly saying you don’t remember a thing from last night?” Morgan questioned, storming across the room until he was standing in front of the kitchen table.

  “No, I don’t remember a damn thing,” Rowan yelled then winced, holding his head again. “It has already been a bad start to my morning. Why are you making me play these guessing games? Just tell me and get it over with. I need to find Akayie. I haven’t seen her at all this morning and I want to talk to her. I need to apologize for getting drunk and passing out on her like I did.”

  Crossing his arms over his chest, Morgan continued glaring at his brother. “Why don’t you think long and hard? Maybe something will jog that brilliant mind of yours and you might remember why you haven’t seen Akayie this morning or, better yet, why she hasn’t come looking for you. Don’t you find that a little odd?”

  Rowan tossed him a look. “Fine, let me think. I know I can
remember something.”

  Taking a seat at the table, Morgan waited while his brother tried to recall that he destroyed the woman he loved over his quick temper and stupid way of jumping to conclusions without knowing all of the facts.

  Minutes ticked by slowly as he waited, the wheels turning behind his brother’s eyes as Rowan struggled to bring up the events of the previous night. Slowly, he saw as his brother started to recall something because his eyes darkened with emotion and his hoarse whisper broke the silence.

  “My God, I remember Hercules had to be put down because of a broken leg,” he choked out, wiping his hand down his face. “I locked myself in my office and started drinking hard shot after shot. I didn’t want anyone to bother me. Akayie tried to come in and comfort me, but I yelled at her and sent her away. I continued drinking for a few more hours to numb the pain and then…”

  “And then, what?” Morgan demanded, slamming his hand on the table making his brother jump. “What happened after you continued drinking for most of the day and well into the night over a fucking horse?”

  “Wait one damn minute,” Rowan snapped, wincing at his own voice “Hercules was more than a fucking horse to me. He was one of the first ones I bought when I decided to start this place. He meant a lot to me and you know it. Shit, why are you in such a bad mood? Has something happened I should know about? Is something wrong with Lucas, or Tanner?”

  “No, they are fine and so are Dante and Amara.”

  “Then what in the hell is your problem?”

  Sighing, Morgan shook his head. “Don’t you find it odd that Akayie isn’t here?”

  Rowan shook his head. “No, isn’t she out on the ranch taking the final pictures for her show?”

  “Did you actually drink so much of that stupid bottle of whiskey that you don’t remember what happened in my bedroom last night?”

  His brother’s eyes narrowed at him. “No, I don’t remember a damn thing, but if you did something to hurt Akayie I swear I will make you regret it for the rest of your damn life,” he growled. “Where is Akayie? Tell me what happened.”

  “Remember how to you told me to check and see if I could find a plastic surgeon who would take on her case?”

  “Yes, she wanted more of her scars of her back taking care of, but all of the doctors she had been to see told her the scar tissue was too bad to make any real difference.”

  “Well, I did contact some of my colleagues and one of them was very interested in helping her, but she had to come to see him. Akayie found me in the hallway trying to get into the study to see you. You weren’t going to let me inside, so she tried and couldn’t get in. Akayie wanted to stay, but I coaxed her to come upstairs with me.”

  “What the fuck?”

  “Calm down and let me finish,” Morgan cut in. “You have no right to be pissed off at me, especially after what you did. So, let me finish since you can’t seem to recall any of this.

  “Akayie came in and I told her everything Dr. Roman brought to me, but she wasn’t sure about making the trip all the way to California for another no. She didn’t want to get disappointed again, but I could see the hope in her eyes she was trying to hide. So, I suggested I could take a few pictures of her back and email them to Dr. Roman.

  “Akayie agreed to my idea. She trusted me enough to take the pictures because I was a doctor and, more importantly, I was your brother. She knew I wouldn’t ever do anything to hurt her. Well, just as she was removing her shirt…”

  Lost in telling his brother the events of last night, Morgan wasn’t paying attention to the horror that slowly crept into Rowan’s face as the memories of his drunken state from last night finally came flooding back to him. “You came into…”

  “No, that didn’t happen,” Rowan denied instantly as an unbearable pain settled in his chest. “That was a horrible nightmare I had last night about how I said those things to Akayie brought on by my overdrinking. I hadn’t attacked a bottle of whiskey like that in years. None of that really happened. I don’t believe you. I would never yell those words at her. Not ever! I love her more than anything in this world.”

  Morgan leaned across the table, getting into his brother’s face. “You said that the sight of her back reminded you of the villains from those teen horror movies and it gave you nightmares so much that you had to drink after you had made love to her. No one can get that drunk, Rowan. Not even you. I can’t believe you didn’t recall any of this until a few minutes ago.”

  “I could never say the sight of her gave me nightmares and I had to drink to make those images go away. No, I wouldn’t do that to her. Not after she confided in me and gave me something so…” His brother’s usually strong voice broke before he could get the rest of his words out.

  Sadly, Morgan shook his head as he saw the sheer agony on Rowan’s face as the truth of the situation sank in. No matter how much he didn’t want to believe it, his big brother knew it was true.

  “I can’t let Akayie think anything I told her last night was the truth,” Rowan said, jumping up from kitchen table. “Tell me where she is. I have to go to her and make her understand I didn’t mean any of it. She has to understand how much I adore her. I think I fell in love with her the very first time she stood up to me.”

  “I don’t know. She begged me to take her to the airport and I told her she needed to stay here and talk to you in the morning. I tried to make her understand that you were just drunk and hurt by Hercules getting put down, but she didn’t want to hear any of it. She promised me that if I didn’t drive her to the airport, she would walk.”

  Rowan rushed around the table and grabbed Morgan by the front of his shirt. “Are you telling me that you let Akayie leave the ranch in the middle of the night in tears and walk into town?”

  Morgan knocked his brother’s hand off him and stood up. “Don’t ever grab me like that again. Unlike you, I’m not a self-centered bastard that would allow Akayie to leave the house alone in the state she was in. No, I drove her to the airport, but I didn’t get out of the car because she didn’t want me to go in with her.”

  “Why in the hell did you listen to her? She was upset and could have booked a flight to anywhere in the world. I’m thinking she went back home, but I could be wrong. I need to call some people and find out if she used any of her credit cards to book a flight back to New York.”

  “Have you lost your mind? Did all the liquor you consumed last night eat away at your brain cells? Do you really think you have a chance at getting within touching distance of Akayie? She will probably call the cops on you if you set one foot on her doorstep. God, let her have some peace from you. You might be ready to beg her to forgive you, but I was there. I saw the tears pouring down her face as you kept hurling insult after insult at her. You are going to have to do more than apologize for Akayie to ever be in the same room with her again.”

  Rowan sighed heavily as he shoved his hands into his pockets, his shoulders hunched forward. “I won’t believe that I’ve lost her. I just can’t live the rest of my life without Akayie by my side,” he said, his voice filled with anguish.

  “How can you expect her to ever look at you the same again?”

  “I… I… can’t deal with this right.” His brother gave him a long, hard look. “Why in the hell didn’t you stop me? You should have shoved me out of the room and slammed the door in my face. Hell, you just let me ruin the best thing that has ever happened to me. God, I will never get her back and we both know it.”

  “No way in hell you are going to blame me for this,” Morgan said. “How many times have I told you to think before you open that damn mouth of yours, but you always told me to shut up or laughed it off. Well, last night you found out what happens when you don’t censor what that mind of yours is thinking. I only want to know one thing.”

  “What?” Rowan snapped. “What is it that my do-no-wrong baby brother wants to know?”

  “How could you ever let those words enter your mind? Did you notice how Akayie con
stantly focused on you when you were around her? Sure, I talked to her, but she never looked at me the way she looked at you. I feel sorry for you, Rowan, but I honestly don’t think you ever have a chance at getting Akayie back in your life, even if you fight for her.”

  Raw hurt glittered in Rowan’s eyes as he took his hands out of his pockets and ran them through his hair. The unwelcome tension stretched even tighter between them as Rowan continued watching him without saying a word.

  Finally, Rowan blew out a deep breath and finally began talking to him again. “Fight for her. Anything I had worth fighting for died that night those awful words came out of my mouth. I have never felt like I do about Akayie for another woman. Somehow, she wrapped her hand around my heart without me even realizing it. She brought romance, fun and happiness, but more than all of that…she gave me her love and I crushed it beneath the heel of my boot because of one night of stupid drinking and being jealous of you.”

  “There was no reason to be jealous of me. I would never pursue Akayie because I knew she wanted you and no one else. We all saw it, why didn’t you?’

  “For once in my life, I’m at a loss. I don’t have a clue how I’m going to get past this. I won’t ever be able to watch Akayie walking around this ranch taking pictures like she owned it instead of me. At first, I had to admit I hated her presence because she made me feel something.”

  “You were drawn to her,” Morgan cut in, feeling his brother’s pain.

  “It was more than that,” Rowan corrected. “I saw a future with Akayie that didn’t involve me spending endless days trying to breed the perfect horse for the Kentucky Derby. I saw me being with the woman I loved, starting a family. Now all of that is gone. I guess my nickname truly fits me now. Not only will I be a loner for the rest of my life, but I will be lonely because I let the perfect woman for me walk out the front door with tears in her eyes put there by me.”