Azaria

by J. H. Hayes

  "Good, you look strong," Yumineh said. "I'm gonna pass the two ahead. You want to race to see who takes them first?"

  Azaria was confounded. She's not spent at all. Is she playing with me?

  Azaria couldn’t answer that question, but it brought her to a momentous decision, one she’d been unable to come to earlier. If you want to win, you're going to have to earn it, she silently told her rival.

  Far ahead of him, Dogahn saw a figure break off from the regular path, headed for the top of High Cliff. A half-moment later he realized it was Azaria. Where’s she going? Then he saw a second figure break off too. Is that Yumineh? What are they doing? They're headed straight for High Cliff. They couldn't be...? They'll kill themselves.

  Dogahn and his friends often strayed at the top of the same intimidating cliff, daring each other to jump into the pool of water far below. But it was always in jest. No one was crazy enough to actually do it. Irizahner, his father, had told him once he and his friends had done the same thing when they were young. He'd told him all young men boasted about jumping. But it was certain death. No one could survive the impact, even if they did manage to clear Vulture Rock, an outjutting about one-third of the way down where the carrion birds nested.

  The two front runners didn’t see Azaria and Yumineh veer off course, but everyone behind them slowed as they watched the two girls running up the incline, utterly confused as to their intent.

  Dogahn watched helplessly as Azaria charged toward the top. Convinced now she planned to make the suicidal leap, he stopped and yelled, "Azaria!! No!" But he didn't have the breath to yell loud enough and she wouldn't have been able to hear him anyway - he was too far behind. There was nothing he could do but wait to see what she did. His mind racing, he thought maybe she'd found a way down the cliffs and had been planning this all along. Dogahn convinced himself she'd stop at the last moment.

  He watched as she approached the edge of the cliff, without slowing, and then plunged off it head first.

  "Azaria!!!"

  Great Mother! She's killed herself... She'll be lost in the spirit world forever.

  From a great distance Dogahn stood, too nauseous to move. Then he watched horrified as Yumineh made to follow Azaria. At the last moment though, she stopped just short. She stood on top of the cliff edge looking down.

  As Dogahn forgot his weariness and sprinted toward her, he imagined the gruesome scene she was looking down upon. Azaria's bloody body smashed atop Vulture Rock, the carrion birds already returning from their fright to pick her bones clean.

  He watched as Yumineh started back down the hill, to take the route that led down to the river. But suddenly she stopped again and turned around. Dogahn could only watch, thoroughly confused. Yumineh planted her back foot and raced to the top, lunging to her death just as Azaria had done.

  Sacred Mother! They're both dead! And I didn't even get a chance to kiss either of them.

  And then a new thought hit him. Yumineh jumped because she saw Azaria had survived. Could it be? Could they be safe? With a glimmer of hope he raced up the incline, as several of the other runners were also doing.

  Azaria had meditated on the jump for moons. She'd secretly tested the pool of water where she thought she would land. She'd swum as far down as her lungs would allow and had never been able to reach bottom. It was her last resort. She’d told herself she’d only do it if she thought she had a chance to win and only if it was absolutely necessary. Even then she wasn't sure she'd be able to muster the courage. Only Yumineh's taunting had driven her off the edge.

  She leapt straight out from the cliff top, her arms outspread, uncertain if she’d clear Vulture Rock. Earlier, she'd been confident she would if she had enough speed, but now was terrified. Deep inside, she’d doubted her own courage. However now that she was in the air, Azaria realized she would clear the landmark rock easily.

  As she soared past, she worried she might have jumped too far. The far side of the river was approaching fast.

  But no.

  As gravity began to dominate over her lateral momentum she realized she’d land almost exactly where she'd imagined she would. Just past the center of the deep pool. She pleaded for it to be deep enough. As she fell she began to anticipate the impact with the dark water of the pool. She was falling head first. She couldn't adjust now to land on her feet. It was too late. Azaria straightened her arms out in front of her, as if it was a normal dive and then closed her eyes.

  Down below, her mother Zephia was waiting on the other side of the river, along with her son and mate and hundreds of others. Most were watching the northeastern incline waiting for the runners to come racing down, but she’d been eyeing a large hawk mother, circling above, hunting for river-meat. Zephia wasn't the only one watching. Hawks were majestic animals, sacred and bearers of tidings - usually welcome ones, but occasionally less so. When she saw a figure suddenly throw itself off the cliff she stared aghast, not believing her eyes. She gulped before opening her mouth to scream warning. As she realized the plunging form was her own daughter, the dread creep of death overpowered her. "Azaria!! Azerban! Azaria!!" was all she could shriek as she pointed upward and fell back.

  Her mate looked up in the direction she was pointing and saw his beloved daughter spread eagle, floating in the air above Vulture Rock, plummeting to her doom. Others were also pointing now, some caught breathless and others screaming in horror. At first they thought she would smash into the giant vulture nests, but as she dropped past them they realized she would live until she hit water. They watched as she soared, mesmerized, a golden-brown eagle-woman falling to her end.

  Azaria hit the water with great force. A magnificent splash rained back down upon the river bank. Zephia, still lying on the dusty path, had turned away, at first unable to watch, but returned her gaze just as her daughter hit, accompanied by a horrible smacking sound. She let out a deathly scream reserved only for mothers forced to watch their children perish.

  Azerban's fatherly instincts took over and he raced into the water yelling his daughter’s name. How did she fall off the cliff? He hadn't yet reached the river, when he saw a head bob up. He sprinted toward it. His beloved Azaria would be dead, but he needed to retrieve her body.

  But she wasn't dead. She was swimming, straight toward him. "Azaria! Azaria!" he continued to call, wading into the river to reach her.

  Thank the Mother she's alive!

  When he finally met her Azerban grasped her arm, but she shook him off. "I'm fine," was all she said as she splashed the rest of the way out and took off running toward Sunset Hill. The rest of the crowd was silent, speechless, only able to watch her pass.

  "She's a bird! Azaria is a bird! Father, Azaria is a bird-runner!" Quzo yelled. Her little brother didn't realize it, but it was a name that would catch on quickly among the other youngsters, partly because he would spend the rest of that sun telling all his friends the amazing story of how his sister had swooped down from the top of High Cliff, hovered over Vulture Rock and then landed on the river, already running for the finish line before her feet touched the water.

  As Azerban followed his daughter to the bank, he heard gasps and then another loud crash sounded behind him. He ripped his eyes from his daughter. Spinning around he was met by another huge spray. He instinctively knew another runner had followed his daughter and feared for that life as well. He swam out and saw a second head bob up in front of him. It was the Fox Camp girl. The one Izyl, the shapely Fox Camp Ta’araki, had helped raise when her parents had perished in that terrible tragedy so many winters ago. He grabbed onto her arm, helping her swim to the bank, amazed she’d survived the fall as well. It was then he realized his daughter hadn’t fallen – she’d jumped. Then he heard more screams. He bowed his head in dread before turning around again and looking up. How many of these foolish children are going to follow her? He saw Dogahn falling straight for him, feet first, arms careening wildly. He feared the young man might land on him, but no, Dogahn had barely cleared Vul
ture Rock and entered the water several paces deeper. Azerban swam out, desperately hoping the boy survived the fall too. He was relieved when Dogahn's head finally pierced the surface and started swimming for the shore, grinning wildly.

  Yumineh looked to her right as she splashed out of the river. The crowd stood as still as the Great Temple stones she'd passed earlier, their maws agape. She saw runners coming down the incline, but ignored them. She knew Azaria had a huge lead. She could only hope the Boar Camp girl was wearied enough to catch her.

  But Azaria wasn't tired anymore, in fact she was exhilarated. She'd survived and was now in the lead. She expected cheering when she swam out of the water, but everything was eerily muted. The ringing in her head drowned out all other sounds. Azaria entered the camp from the north. She ran past the feasting grounds, past the mud-brick shelters, and toward the path to Sunset Hill. No one would catch her. There was no chance. She didn't know Yumineh and Dogahn had imitated her suicide plunge. She thought all the other runners would be far behind, still on the decline, or maybe even atop High Cliff, mouths hanging, watching her finish the race first.

  Yumineh ran her heart out, still not completely understanding what had happened. She’d been in total control, poised to take the race almost effortlessly and now Azaria was ahead of her. Her head was pounding, her legs numb. She felt nauseous. She’d never liked heights. The urge to gag was overwhelming. Deep down she knew she couldn't catch her Boar Camp rival, only watch helplessly as Azaria peaked Sunset Hill and ran between the finish stones.

  The crowd, finally recovering from the shock of the unexpected drama, ran after Azaria and Yumineh and almost trampled Dogahn as he labored through the encampment and up Sunset Hill. Even some of the elderly were passing him.

  Yumineh finished second and Dogahn third, although the two who'd been leading almost managed to catch up before he ran between the stones. They were completely baffled as to how the other three runners had managed to pass them. It was an explanation they would later listen to in awe, unbelieving, disappointed they'd missed it.

  ---

  Azaria was exasperated. At first she’d allowed herself to glory in her achievement, basking in the praise. The burst of elation she’d gained from the jump and victory had overpowered her natural tendency to shy away from excessive attention. But as she and Daneel gathered with her mother in their shelter to prepare for the Feast, she'd already decided she'd had enough. Children had been following her around all sun, begging her to sprout wings and fly again or just sticking around in case she decided to without their prodding. And they weren't the only ones. Countless young men - and older ones - had approached. Many only wanted to congratulate her, but it quickly became clear some had other interests. Azaria wasn't good at flirting, she didn't understand all the subtleties yet, and was discovering she didn't like too much of it, especially when it came all at once. She was grateful Daneel, who took everything in stride, stuck with her through it all. Daneel, in fact, seemed to enjoy all the attention that suddenly came with being Azaria's best friend.

  All sun long, Swan and Fox Camp members were coming up to re-introduce themselves. Azaria had never met so many people in so short a period. She did her best to remember all the names and ties, but it was too much. She’d forget one person's name as soon as the next approached her. To make it all worse, it seemed each new acquaintance had a host of friends and family members they wanted to introduce her to. Some of the mothers were even more aggressive than the impertinent men. She'd already received several dowry offers from pushy matriarchs who wanted to tie their sons to her. Thankfully, her own mother was also staying close and making sure she didn't get maneuvered into anything, speaking for her when Azaria became flustered. Zephia was shocked by some of the offers however, and against her better judgment, briefly considered the more extravagant ones before remembering her daughter was barely of age.

  As the sun dropped, Azaria wasn't looking forward to the night's festivities nearly as much as she'd expected to. She wasn't sure she even wanted to attend now, if everyone was going to continue to behave as they had since the end of the race. But she knew at the very least she'd have to show up to receive her accommodation, and besides that, she was really looking forward to seeing Dogahn.

  Back in her shelter with her mother and Daneel, Azaria vented her frustration. "I don't think I can leave, Mother. This is the only place I can find any peace. Look, there are children hovering outside, waiting for me to come out," she said as she peaked through the leather flaps.

  "Don't you dare whine, young girl!!" her mother tore into her. "You asked for this with your reckless actions and now you will accept the consequences without complaint." Zephia had worn a stern face all sun, but was waiting until they were alone to reprimand her daughter. She didn't want to do it in front of Daneel, but Azaria's self-pity was too much to take.

  "Yes, mother," Azaria whimpered. She’d suspected her mother was upset. This opening salvo confirmed her suspicions. She'd hoped making it clear she wasn’t enjoying the attention would dampen her mother's ire, but apparently it wasn't going to work that way.

  "What could possibly have driven you insane enough to try something so stupid?" Zephia railed.

  "I'm sorry, mother."

  "I didn't ask if you were sorry. I asked what drove you to such foolishness!"

  "I know, mother. I... I don't know. I'm sorry."

  "What do you mean you don't know? That's not an answer. I asked you why you jumped off that rock!"

  Azaria started to well up. She couldn't remember ever being so harshly handled by her mother, nor seeing her so irate. Not even Quzo had ever made her so angry. "I... I knew I could make it... I tried to swim to the bottom of the river earlier, but I couldn't reach-"

  "Wait! What?" Zephia cut her off. "You planned this? You've been planning this all along? Did Azerban know about this?"

  "What? No... Father didn't-"

  "Daneel?! Did you know?" Zephia interrupted again, turning around.

  Daneel had been sitting quietly on Azaria's furs, thinking of the different places she'd rather be, like fighting a pack of wolverines, or maybe at the bottom of the river. She wasn't at all prepared to be yelled at. "I... No... I..." she stammered.

  Azaria lost control, tears trickling down her high cheeks. "M-Mother, D-daneel didn't know. Father didn't know," she stammered. "I-I thought of the idea moons ago, but I didn't tell anyone. I didn't know if I could do it. When we reached the path to High Cliff, I knew I couldn't beat Yumineh. She was too good. So I just decided. I wasn't sure if I would actually do it. But when I reached the top of the cliff, I just closed my eyes and jumped."

  Seeing her daughter break down in front of her served to finally dim Zephia's ire. She really only needed a chance to vocalize the terror she'd experienced watching her only daughter plunge to what seemed like certain death. Now with it off her chest, the overpowering need to comfort her child took over. "Oh Azaria! Shhh girl. It's okay. It's okay... I'm sorry I got angry. I was just so scared. I thought I'd lost you..." As she spoke, her eyes dampened also.

  "I know mother. I'm so sorry..." Azaria said, as a fresh stream of drops ran down.

  Daneel thought this was the perfect opportunity to make her exit. "I'll just leave you two alone," she whispered.

  "No, don't you go anywhere Daneel, come here," Zephia said with a sob. "The Mother knows you've been a part of this family since the morning you and Azaria first played together. If I didn't think of you as a daughter too, I never would have yelled at you." She finally burst into tears also, holding one of her arms out to embrace her daughter's best friend.

  Daneel sobbed as she wrapped her arms around the other two women, partly because their tears evoked her own, but mostly from Zephia's heartfelt and unexpected admission.

  The three women were still weeping when the leather flaps swung open and Azerban entered with his son. Quzo walked in nonchalantly, as if nothing unusual was occurring, but Azerban stopped in his tracks. He'd been bu
sy with the other Ta'araki preparing for the night's ceremonies and had little sense what the three women had been going through. "Whoa, Quzo," he whispered. "Maybe we should leave these women alone."

  "No, it's okay. They're jus' bein' girls," Quzo exclaimed in his most normal voice, setting the three women off in giggles, which relaxed Azerban enough to come all the way in.

  "Is everything okay here?" he asked. He was as angry with his daughter as he knew his mate was. He thought he had a pretty good idea of what might have transpired, but was still curious.

  "Yes, Quzo is correct. We were just sharing a womanly moment," Zephia replied as she reached out for her boy. "Come here, my son."

  "Aaawwwwah," Quzo protested, already knowing what she was going to say, for she'd been telling him the same thing all sun.

  Zephia took her son's face within her hands. "Don't you ever jump off that rock, do you hear me?"

  So it was about Azaria's jump, Azerban confirmed to himself.

  "But I wanna be Bird-Runner too!" Quzo whined.

  Alarmed, Zephia looked up to her mate for assistance. Nodding, Azerban took his son's shoulder and turned him around, kneeling down to meet him eye to eye. "Quzo, listen to me boy. You’re not to jump off High Cliff or any other rock without my direct permission. Do you hear me?"

  "Yes, father..."

  "Now you will get to jump off rocks, but we will do it together. Do you understand?"

  "Yes, father..."

  "Good!!" Azerban concluded before lifting him up over his head and spinning him around. "I'm happy we understand each other then."

  "Well, now that we have that behind us, I think we should get these girls into their outfits," Zephia said, wiping any remaining wetness from her eyes.

  Daneel, happy to see an end to the earlier unpleasantness, unrolled the outfit she'd brought over for the celebration. "Azaria, will you help me into this?" she asked.

  Azaria helped her slip into a gazelle skin tunic and turned her around. She'd seen this particular outfit before, but was awed when she saw the front. It had always been an admirable piece, but Daneel - presumably with the help of her mother - had been working on it. Two rows of shiny black jewels, each with a white stripe running around its hemisphere, now draped down the front of her dress, from one shoulder, down and across her bust and back up the other side. The stones had been strategically drilled and positioned so that the white stripe ran continuously. The effect was to ensure any observer's eyes lingered on her full chest.