His Soul To Keep (Dark Knights of Heaven Book 1)

by Knight, TW

  "Ending the war and getting us back into Heaven."

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Rail grabbed Cassidy’s flailing arms. She clawed at him. Fought him. Her confusion and fear filled the air like a heavy fog.

  This was the third time she’d woken in this state since her resurrection, and it tore at his heart. Rail didn’t remember if he or any of the others had been like this the first time they’d died and come back. Now he either struggled lazily out of the darkness or came out of it suddenly like waking from a bad dream. Occasionally, one of them would come back fighting as if still in the throes of the battle that had killed them. "Come on, sweetheart, you can work through this." He kept his voice soft and low to disguise his fear. "You can do it. Come back to me." Cassidy turned to face him for the first time, her eyes wide, pupils dilated to the point where the irises were no more than thin rings of color around the black. "That’s right, sweetheart. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere."

  Zach came up behind him and checked the monitors. "Get into bed and hold her. She needs a physical connection with the living right now."

  He didn’t hesitate or question his friend. Releasing Cassidy’s wrists, Rail put down the guardrail and slid under the covers. At first, she resisted his touch, tensing, but slowly she relaxed as he stroked her hair and pulled her closer. Shaking, she buried her face in the notch between his shoulder and neck, her hands curling against his chest. The tears came slowly at first, then in sobbing waves.

  "Let it out, baby," Rail whispered, kissing her hair. "It’ll be okay."

  She sniffled and shook her head.

  Rail let out pent up breath, unable to hide his relief. Her conscious mind was returning. She understood him. "Yes, it will." He lifted her chin, meeting her frightened gaze. Her eyes were red and puffy, but no longer wildly dilated. "I promise. It will be okay. Remember, I can’t lie to you." He sealed his promise with a kiss, soft and sweet. Cassidy relaxed against him, releasing an exhausted groan.

  "Rail," she whispered hoarsely, her voice raw and pained.

  "There’s my girl." He smiled until his cheeks hurt.

  New tears slid down Cassidy’s face. "Oh God, Rail, I…I think I died!"

  "Yes." He breathed out. "Yes, you did." God, how he wished he could lie to her. Tell her it had all been a bad dream.

  Trembling, she asked, "How long was I…was I gone?"

  "A few hours."

  "Hours!" Cassidy pulled away, tremors coursing through her body. "Hours! Then what…how am I…How is that possible?"

  "Does it matter? You are alive. As alive as any of us." Rail relaxed some more. Cassidy was not just aware of her surroundings, but coming back to herself second by second.

  "No.” she coughed. “That can’t be. People don’t just come back from the dead after hours. Minutes, maybe. But not hours."

  "You’re not just people anymore. You’re my Aktura-nom, my soul mate."

  "Which means what? What does that make me?"

  Rail shrugged. "Honestly, I have no clue. I’m just guessing here. But if I’m right, if Kaz is right, and we are true soul mates, then our souls have merged. Became one. Now, we each carry a piece of what we created. Part of me is still in there," he placed a hand on her chest, "and now, I think part of you is in here." He placed her hand on his own chest.

  "Did you bring me back?" She hiccupped.

  Rail ran his thumb over Cassidy’s trembling lower lip as he cupped her face in his hands. "I didn’t consciously do anything but mourn you. I don’t know how this happened."

  Cassidy slid a little closer. "So, now I’m like you? I can’t die?"

  "If all this is true, then as long as we’re together, you can’t permanently die." At her surprised look, he smiled sadly and ran his fingers through her hair. "Okay, you can’t die by mundane means. You’ll come back as long as it isn’t a skratar that kills you and eats your soul. Our souls," he amended and kissed her.

  "Does that mean you can die, like, dead-dead, if a skratar kills you?" Pain colored her voice. "Will we both die?"

  Rail shrugged.

  "God, I’m so mixed up." Cassidy ran her hands over her face, wiping away the tears still leaking from her eyes. Her breathing slowed. "Did you know what was happening to me?"

  "No. I couldn’t feel anything. I was numb with the thought of losing you." Rail abruptly sat up. "Wait, you remember?"

  "It felt like hours, but I didn’t think it really was hours. I didn’t think I was dead. I thought maybe I was in a coma or something. I felt so lost." She chewed her lower lip for a moment. "Is that what’s like for you? Do you come back screaming and freaking out?"

  "Sometimes," he whispered and pulled her close again, needing to feel her life and energy.

  "Do you go to that awful place?" Cassidy asked, turning worried eyes toward Rail.

  He cocked an eyebrow. "I’m not sure what you mean. I don’t remember much about the hours…days I’m dead. I go to someplace dark and cold, I know that. The awakening is always rough in those first few minutes. Sensory overload." He rubbed her back. "Being dead is like sensory deprivation."

  "Yes, that’s what happened. I went someplace dark and cold." Cassidy shuddered. "So, so dark. There were voices in the dark at first, but they faded away. I couldn’t see anything, but at times I thought…I thought something was touching me." Tears rolled silently down her cheek and Rail caught them at her chin. "The cold seeped into my bones, my heart, and soul. Then I heard your voice, but not really a voice. I heard you call me, but not with words." She shook her head. "I can’t explain it."

  "I know what you mean.” He shivered. “This last time, in Peru, I could feel you pulling me. I’ve never experienced that before, so I fought to come back even though…"

  "Even though?"

  "I’ve been so tired of all of this fighting and running, it’s been harder to come back each time. I welcomed the dark and the quiet. If not for you, I wonder if I would have given in to the darkness."

  "Don’t. Don’t think that way. God, Rail. Please. I need you here with me more than ever now." A sob escaped as Cassidy clung to Rail.

  "Don’t worry, sweetheart. I will fight tooth and claw to get back to you. To stay with you. No matter what."

  Cassidy snuggled closer, got tangled in her IV, and growled as the monitors picked up her frustration. "Can you get rid of this stuff?"

  She was definitely back to herself.

  Laughing, Rail gingerly removed the sticky monitor connections from her chest and back and reached over her to shut off the complaining monitors. "Let’s leave the IV in for now, okay?"

  "Scared to take it out?" she joked.

  "No. You need it. Remember, you haven’t had any food or water in almost a day."

  "Okay, you win. I’m too tired to argue anyway."

  "Then rest, sweetheart. Rest."

  "What are we going to do now that I’m immortal?" She yawned, closing her eyes.

  "Don’t get ahead of yourself, sweetheart. We don’t know if you really are immortal yet. Honestly, I’m not in an all-fired hurry to find out."

  "Wouldn’t it be cool though? If I could fight monsters with you?" she asked dreamily.

  "Yeah. Cool." Rail kissed her head and pulled Cassidy even closer as she drifted off to real, restful sleep. At the very idea of Cassidy putting her life on the line, a sick feeling formed in his stomach and flowed through his veins like acid, burning him with dread. But he’d let that conversation go for now. He’d rather fight the Dark One Himself than try and tell Cassidy she would not be going into battle. Ever.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Lucifer tossed his throne across the room and screamed loudly enough to make the cavern quake. "I’m surrounded by incompetent morons!"

  Idras tucked her feet under herself to avoid the ever-growing pool of blood in front of the chaise she’d now decided was hers when visiting. "Did you have to be so messy about dispatching him?" She examined her nails. "There are other ways to kill a demon."
/>   "Not as much fun." Lucifer snarled, plucking a bit of flesh from his nails.

  "Whatever. It’s your mess."

  With a deep breath, Lucifer forced himself to calm down and stalked to the sideboard to pour a goblet of blood-wine. "Has your vision changed?"

  "Which one?" She teased, tapping a finely manicured nail against her chin. Idras ducked just as the goblet sailed past her head. "You got wine on my robes!"

  Lucifer yanked her from the chaise, not caring about the consequences if she reported him to the Dark One. "No. More. Games." He saw a flicker of fear in her eyes and wondered if her well-touted protection wasn’t over stated. "The prophecy, witch. Tell me what you see."

  "Nothing has changed. The wheels are still in motion, but…"

  "But?" He growled and dug his claws into her arms. Was that arousal he saw in her eyes now? Disgusted, he threw her back into the chaise and moved restlessly around the room.

  "My vision is cloudy."

  "What does that mean?"

  "That while it’s coming to pass, I can’t tell you the outcome. There are too many variables now. We may still yet get what we want, just not the way we thought we would get it." She tapped her well-manicured nails against the seat.

  "Yes, the problem with any prophecy lies in the interpretation. That alone could change the outcome. Change your visions."

  "Oh. Did you find that little scroll?"

  Lucifer growled again.

  "Guess not.” Idras laughed teasingly. “Well, you’ll just have to play your games blind."

  "I’ve nudged enough players one way or the other for our benefit for ages. I don’t need the original prophecy to play my games." Although having it would help him set things on the proper path. When Idras didn’t respond, Lucifer turned to see what she was up to and found the deceivingly dainty creature naked. Her discarded robe lay on the floor, soaking up the blood pool. "What are you doing?"

  "I couldn’t wear that. It was dirty." She pouted like a child.

  Lucifer felt his body stir in ways he’d long forgotten. Damnr how that she-beast could set his body afire. Quite literally if he wasn’t careful. Clamping his jaw, he snatched a silk robe from his bed and tossed it to her. "Better?"

  "Lovely," Idras purred, stroking the fabric like a lover. She slipped the robe on and tied it so low her breasts were barely contained. "You do remember that I’m not the only Seer in the world, right? There’s always three of us to help keep the balance." Lucifer glared knives at her. "Don’t blame me. It’s another one of those pesky Universal Rules. Anyway, we see the same things, but of course we interpret them differently based on our allegiances."

  It took all his effort to hide the fact he had forgotten.

  The Seer tossed her hair over her shoulder. "Of course, my sisters are nowhere near as accurate as I am."

  "Is that why you cannot see the outcome? Your sisters are interfering?"

  "No. As you said, the outcome is based on who interprets the assorted prophecies. That is why my vision is cloudy. Things are changing. Whatever happened today shifted things."

  Lucifer turned away and resumed pacing. If the Knights had one of the other Seers versions of the prophecy, they could be purposely working against the fates. Trying to change the outcome. Force it to their favor.

  In that they were much alike.

  His rage at Sayer’s failure eased some.

  He snarled and kicked at what once had been a kidney. "All you had to do was find out what the Knights were after on their little field trip. Not kill a soul-keeper. Idiot." The mission couldn’t even be considered a partial success—the electronic storage device had been blank. Lucifer whistled shrilly and a pair of skratar lumbered into the chamber. "Clean up this mess."

  The beasts were more than eager to obey.

  Idras wrinkled her pert nose. "Uggh. They stink."

  "Death always does, my dear."

  Chapter Thirty

  Cassidy wiggled her toes deeper into the warm sugar-soft sand and lifted her face to the sun.

  Everything was so new—it was as if her body felt everything around her on the cellular level. The sun’s warmth and energy moved through her skin, seeping into her blood, spreading throughout her body, and awakening her senses. The cold hand of death still clung to her bones, but it’s hold faded under the sun.

  "You know, you can’t sneak up on me." She opened her eyes and looked over her shoulder with a smile.

  Rail walked out of the foliage, looking delicious in his open loose white shirt, muscular legs flexing below the hems of his baggie board shorts. "I wasn’t trying to sneak up on you. I was trying not to disturb your meditation."

  "Meditation?" She turned back toward the rolling waves. "I wouldn’t call it meditation, really, but I was thinking."

  "About what?" Rail dropped into the sand behind her, framing her body with his—ever protective.

  Cassidy leaned against his chest, covering his hands with hers as Rail wrapped his arms around her. "I died two days ago. I came back from the dead. Now, I’m different." She watched a pair of dolphins frolicking offshore.

  "We’ll take this one day at a time."

  "How do you deal with the whole coming back to life thing?"

  "We just do." Rail shifted.

  "Will you tell me what you remember about that first time?" She rubbed her thumb over the back of his hand. Her chest ached with the thought of Rail dying time and time again through the millennia. She was having a difficult time dealing with just one trip into the Void.

  Rail rested his chin on her head. "I don’t remember much, but I do remember I didn’t handle it well. I didn’t understand what had happened. I was alone and fighting a demon that had attacked a human village." He closed his eyes. "I woke up days after the battle, buried beneath a cairn of stones."

  Cassidy twisted to face her strong, loving, gorgeous Fallen Angel. Kneeling between his thighs, she rested her hands on his shoulders. "You woke up in a grave?"

  "I was dead. The demon had sliced me open. The surviving humans buried me out of respect for my attempt to save them."

  "What happened when you when you came back?" She caressed his face to ease his tension. Rail opened his eyes.

  "I dug myself free and the humans fled in terror. That was the first time I realized I was no longer an angel. It was also the first time I fully transformed. I couldn’t control the rage. A few villagers returned with weapons and attacked me. I killed them out of fear. I was so confused. After that, I stayed away from human encampments for a long time."

  "How long?"

  He shrugged. "A few thousand years, give or take a hundred."

  "I can’t believe you lived alone for so long." Cassidy kissed him softly.

  "I had to learn to control my transitions. I’m sworn to protect humanity, even from myself."

  When he shifted his hold and rubbed her arms, Cassidy caught a glimpse of color through his shirt, right over his left pectoral. "What’s this?" She moved the fabric out of the way to examine Rail's new tattoo and gasped at its beauty. There, rising toward his collar bone, was a being of light, neither male or female, but both angel and demon—the figure surrounded by an aura of blues and greens on the right, which faded to reds and oranges on the left. Against the blues and greens was a silver-white angel wing so realistic Cassidy could almost feel the soft feathers. On the left side, a black demon wing stood out in contrast against the red and orange. "It’s…it’s…"

  "It’s us. One heart. One soul. One being forever."

  "It’s wonderful," she whispered, skimming her fingers over the figure. "When did you get this done?"

  "This morning, after your check up."

  Cassidy traced the outline. "I want one."

  Rail grimaced. "A tattoo?"

  "I hear a 'no' in that." She leaned back and crossed her arms over her chest.

  "You can do what you want. I just don’t like the idea of you marking up your perfect body."

  She giggled as he kissed her.
"Flattery—now that’s a new argument technique." Rail continued trailing kisses down her neck and across her collarbone. "Uh, Rail?"

  "Hmmm?"

  Cassidy lifted his chin. "I know where this is going, but I have vowed to never have sex on the beach again. I’m not spending another two hours getting sand out of places it should never be."

  "Even if I help with all of those hard-to-reach places?"

  "Sorry, enticing as that sounds," Cassidy kissed his neck, nipped his ear, "no sand."

  "But I want you now."

  "I want you too." Her voice dipped, husky with desire. Running her hands up and down his arms, she scooted forward to feel his arousal against her belly. "But not here."

  Rail stood and wrapped Cassidy’s legs around his waist. "You’ve given me the perfect idea."

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Cassidy winced as she pulled on a t-shirt, sat back against the headboard, and adjusted the pillows. "You know, if we’re going to keep having sex in the shower, we need to pad the tiles or something."

  Rail slid sensuously into bed next to her, his sweatpants riding low. "I’ll look into it." He kissed the spot on her shoulder he knew was bruised. "In the meantime, please accept this as an apology." He presented her with a laptop.

  Excited, she snatched it from his hands like a greedy child on Christmas morning. "How did you get Kaz to agree?"

  "He doesn’t know. It’s one of mine. Besides, we’re not breaking the rules. You’re under supervision." He reached over the side of the bed and produced a second laptop. "I thought we could spend some alone time looking over the files we appropriated."

  Setting the laptop aside, Cassidy bracketed Rail's face with her hands and planted a kiss on his mouth. "Thank you."

  Rail smiled against her lips as he returned the kiss. "Work now, play later."

  Huffing in disappointment, Cassidy settled back and booted the computer. It was just as well; she needed to rest after their most recent love-making marathon. "Where’s the hard drive?"

  "Right here." Rail produced the drive Hacker downloaded the files onto and hooked it up to both computers. "Let’s get to work."