Chapter Sixteen
We sat in the sterile corridor, neither of us saying a word to one another.
Jenna gripped my hand.
“Zane Michaelson,” the nurse said, breaking the silence. “Would you come this way, please?”
“Yes,” I stammered, casting a quick glance at Jenna, letting go of her hand, and following the nurse.
She closed the door behind me, and my whole body shook. Was my reckless behaviour going to be my undoing?
I already knew what to expect after speaking to the doctor–just a prick of blood from my finger, and in twenty minutes give or take a few, I would know what damage I’d truly caused.
*
Oh, God, I can’t believe it’s come to this, I said to myself.
I’d just watched Zane go into the room for his HIV test, and I was terrified. I’d already been for a test and thankfully, it was negative, but I’d only had sex with my husband.
After confessing to random sex with the two strangers, he assured me the other he used protection with, but how did he know the condom hadn’t ripped? I couldn’t move on until I knew, but if he was positive, I would find a way to live with it. It’s not a death sentence any longer, I knew that much, but I had to know.
I loved Zane with all my heart, and I knew that he loved me too. If there was any doubt in my mind, I wouldn’t be sitting here now, waiting to see what our future held.
It felt like a lifetime, and then I heard the door click, and he walked into view, his face ashen.
*
I walked out of the room and sat beside Jenna. She was deathly pale. I fumbled for her hand, mine still trembling. She held my hand in both of hers.
“Are you okay?” she asked, and I could hear the nerves in her voice.
“Shitting myself,” I replied, focusing hard to get any words out at all.
“Do you want to go for a coffee while we wait?”
“I couldn’t keep anything down,” I replied.
So, we sat in silence, listening to the clock on the wall tick-tocking–like a doomsday countdown.
*
“Zane Michaelson,” the nurse called again, as my stomach turned over. “Doctor is ready for you now.”
Jenna grabbed my hand and led the way. I really thought she would back out, and make me go through this on my own, but she was still the same strong-minded woman I married.
We entered the room. The same doctor I’d spoken to prior to my test was sat behind his desk–his verdict would alter my destiny.
“Ah, Mr. Michaelson, take a seat,” he said. “If you’d like to pull up a chair, Mrs. Michaelson.”
Jenna pulled up a chair and sat next to me, clutching my hand as tightly as she had when she was in labour with the girls.
I stared at the doctor, all the while silently praying to whoever, that whilst I’d been an absolute idiot, I hadn’t completely ruined my life. I held my breath, prepared for the worst.
“Good news–the test came back negative,” he said, his tone matter of fact.
Jenna let out a small cry of relief.
“Are you sure?” I asked, my hands trembling.
“Yes, we’re sure, but you will need to come back for repeat testing in three months.”
I bent forward and held my head in my hands, letting out a sigh of relief. Looking up at him again. “Thank you,” I said, gratefully. “Thank you, so much.”
What else could I say. I’d just been given my life back, and I wasn’t going to waste a second of it.
I turned to Jenna and leant in to kiss her. Tears flowed down her cheeks as she returned my kiss.
Chapter Seventeen
Chad was biting his fingernails when I got back to his house.
He looked up as I entered the room.
“Well?” he asked, using his fingers to push his blond hair back from his face.
“Negative, but I’ll get tested again to be certain.”
He closed his eyes. “Thank God.”
I sat next to him and grabbed his hand. He was trembling, just as I was.
“No, thank you. If you hadn’t forced me to tell Jenna, I would never have been brave enough to take the test.”
He looked at me, that same old look, and before I knew it, we were kissing – the slow, passionate kind, the way we used to. He grabbed my bottom lip gently with his teeth, and I felt the familiar feeling, just like before, but it was wrong.
I pulled away. “Chad, we can’t.”
“Why?” he asked.
“Because I don’t love you like that.”
The words were too harsh, I knew that, but without time to think, there they were, as I felt them.
“You don’t have to love me, we can just carry on as we did before.”
I knew he was grasping at straws.
“No, Chad, that wouldn’t be fair on any of us.”
“Why?” he asked, again.
“Because it would mean more to you than it would to me. To me, it would just be sex without any emotion attached. I can’t do that to you, or Jenna. It’s her I want to be with. I won’t hurt either of you anymore. I’ve been so selfish, and now it’s time to get my life back in order.”
“But, I don’t care–just sex is fine.”
“You’re lying to yourself, and in time, you’d end up hating me for it. You deserve to find somebody else to love –someone who can love you back.”
“I love you,” he said, his voice cracking. “I don’t want anybody else.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“So, Jenna wins?”
“There was never going to be a different outcome–it was always my family.”
“I don’t want to lose you, Zane.”
“I was never yours to lose.”
I felt like a monster, but I had to be cruel to be kind. I wanted him to let go. Yes, it might have been the cowardly way, forcing him to walk away, but I wasn’t strong enough at that moment in time. Him hating me was the only way it would work.
He didn’t say another word as he stood up and walked to the sitting room door.
“Chad, I’m so sorry,” I said. “We can’t leave it like this.”
“I’m away for a week. Please don’t be here when I return.” He didn’t look at me.
I heard him grab his car keys, then a minute later, he reversed out of his drive and out of sight.
Chapter Eighteen
Nine months had passed since I walked out the door and away from my marriage. Where had the time gone?
It had taken Jenna and me a while to get to the point we were now at.
Counselling, both as a couple, and individually helped us decide if our marriage was worth saving, or if we could even move forward with the hope of putting the last year behind us.
I didn’t expect Jenna to trust me completely, yet, but she surprised me, and allowed me back into her life in all ways, but one. She wasn’t ready for that part of our life to resume.
After leaving Chad’s, I’d rented a furnished apartment close by, seeing both Jenna and the girls every day. Wanting to disrupt the children’s lives as little as possible, we played happy families, even when things were heated between us. We learned to put a face on our problems until we found a way to resolve them.
I’d faced questions from both sides of the family as to the cause of our break up, but both Jenna and I decided they didn’t need to know the true extent, so we blamed my commitments to my job. I’m not sure our families believed us entirely, but nothing was mentioned to me–they were just hopeful we could put our marriage back on track.
It wasn’t plain sailing to get to where we were, but eventually, we decided we didn’t want to live apart anymore. What we had was worth fighting for, and whilst our marriage would never be the same, the love we had for one another was stronger than ever.
I was finally going home.
It was Christmas Eve, and thankfully, it wasn’t snowing as I climbed out of my car, opening the boot and retrieving two huge sacks of presents.
/>
I noticed Jenna peeping out of the front window. Smiling, I blew her a kiss. She kissed the window, leaving a trace of her pink lipstick behind.
I used my key for the first time in a long time and pushed the door open.
“Ho, Ho, Ho,” I shouted at the top of my voice.
“Daddy,” the girls shouted, as they came running from their playroom. I dropped the sacks of presents, which they ignored, as they launched themselves at me, knocking me off my feet and flat on my back.
“Girls, be careful,” Jenna said, looking worried. “You’ll hurt Daddy.”
I looked up at my girls’ smiling faces. “Nah,” I said, laughing, as I tickled them.
They both dissolved into giggles. A sound I’d missed more than I could ever say.
“Father Christmas is coming tomorrow, Daddy,” Naya informed me.
“Is he really? Are you sure?”
“Yes, and we’ve left him a mince pie and a glass of milk by the chimley,” Macy added.
My heart melted. “And what about poor Rudolf and the rest of the reindeers? Won’t they be hungry flying all that way from the North Pole to bring two little terrors their presents?”
“Mummy, what about the reindeers?” Naya looked concerned.
“Why don’t you both let Daddy get up off the floor and then you can go into the kitchen and get a bag of carrots out of the fridge, and maybe Rudolf and his friends will enjoy them. What do you think?”
“Okay, Mummy,” they replied, jumping up, trampling me under their tiny feet.
I lay flat on the floor, looking up at my beautiful wife.
“Hello, Mr. Michaelson,” she said, offering her hand.
“Well hello to you, Mrs. Michaelson.” I climbed to my feet, and wrapped my arms around her, feeling secure for the first time in months. I’d forgotten how amazing it felt to be this close to her.
“I’ve missed you,” Jenna said, in between kisses.
“I’m never going anywhere again.”
She kissed me fiercely, then pulled away. “When the girls are in bed, and certainly before Santa gets here, you’re gonna show me how much you have missed me.”
“Grrr,” I growled. “Yes, Mrs. Michaelson.”
*
I peeped my head around the door and the girls were finally asleep.
They were so excited to have me home, and despite the fact I’d been with them every day since my test results came back, they still knew life was different.
The results were a turning point for both Jenna and me.
We’d been talking for a long time. We both wanted the same thing, but she had to be sure what I was telling her was true.
And when the decision was made for me to come home, nothing was going to stand in my way
*
I lay in bed, and admittedly, it felt strange being back there.
We had discussed selling the house, but we both loved it here and saw no reason to unsettle the girls any more than this last year already had.
Jenna was in the bathroom – I could hear her pottering about.
A few minutes later, the bathroom door opened, and I gasped, then chuckled at the sight before me. Jenna was dressed as a sexy Mrs. Claus. Black heels, a red velvet Basque with matching suspenders, and a cute little Santa hat with white fur trim.
I pulled the duvet back.
My cock hardened immediately, and all the muscles in my body tensed. I’d worked out daily, all the anger and rage built up inside me channelled into making myself look the best I could. I looked pretty good, even if I did say so myself.
She licked her lips as she walked over to the bed, then dropping onto her knees, she crawled toward me. Kissing the tip of my cock, she looked up at me. “I’ve missed both of you.”
“I bet you’ve missed my cock more,” I joked.
“Mmmm,” was her only reply. “I’m saying nothing that could get me convicted in a court of law.”
“Oi, cheeky,” I replied, pulling her attention back to me. “Kiss me, you horny bitch,” I said.
“Okay, stud,” she replied, “but I want so much more than that, just so you know.”
“Oh, you’re gonna get so much more than that, I promise you that much.”
She lay on top of me, kissing me for a long time, then pulled away, the same mischievous look on her face that the girls sometimes had.
“What are you up to?” I asked
“Look under the bed and see for yourself–I might have bought you an early Christmas present.”
I looked under the bed and found the glittery red bag with the big bow. Plonking it on the bed, I peered inside and laughed. “What the hell is that?”
“I think it’s called ‘Santa’s Little Helper.’”
I pulled the novelty vibrator from the bag and cast my eye over it. “I wouldn’t say anything about this was little.”
“Well, we can try it out, and then decide, what do you think?”
“We?”
“Yes, both of us.” She looked into my eyes. “I know everything there is to know about you, Zane, and as long as we’re always open and honest with one another, there’s no reason we can’t explore together.”
Sounded good to me, but I wondered what she meant by the explore together comment. I chose to ignore it for now, but I wanted to know if it meant what I thought it did.
“I want you so badly, Jenna.”
“Then what are you waiting for–you’re in charge?” she purred, as she lay on her back and opened her legs.
Another surprise awaited me when I noticed the little red panties she was wearing. I would have to undo the laces to taste her, and that’s exactly what I did.
I placed a pillow underneath to lift her pelvis and pushed her knees wide, needing as much room to explore as possible. Wanting her to enjoy every moment, I slowly licked her inner thigh, increasing speed and intensity. She loved to be teased, I knew that. Listening to her breathing, I could hear the excitement building, and the slight movement of her hips proved it. I grabbed ‘Santa’s Little Helper’ and turned it on, feeling the vibration. Slowly I rubbed it along her thigh until I was at the opening of her pussy. I wasn’t going to give it to her straight away and teased, pressing the tip of the vibrator onto her clitoral hood while I explored her labia with my tongue. Before long, she was writhing on the bed, moaning in ecstasy as my tongue explored deeper into her. Once again, I increased the pressure and speed with my tongue, then increased the pressure of the vibrator, rubbing in an up and down rhythm. Feeling she was close, I eased off with the vibrator and with a side to side motion, I explored her some more, before shudders racked her body, and she was mine once again.
Chapter Nineteen
Christmas Day and it was still dark when the girls came bounding excitedly into our bedroom.
“Father Christmas has been,” Macy shouted. “I heard him on the roof.” She held onto her sister’s hand.
I rolled over to look at their excited faces.
“Come on, Jen–we’ve got no chance of any more sleep, have we, girls?”
“No, Daddy,” Naya said, a mischievous look on her face.
I held my arms open and they leapt onto the bed like excited puppies.
They rushed into my arms.
“Merry Christmas, my little angels. I love you.”
I kissed them both on top of their cute little heads.
“Mummy loves you too,” Jenna said, pulling the girls into her arms and covering them with kisses. “Shall we go and see if Father Christmas ate his mince pie and gave the carrots to the reindeers?”
They nodded their heads, needing no further encouragement.
I watched as they rushed out of the room, looking adorable in their little Christmas pudding romper suits.
“Watch the stairs,” I shouted after them.
Jenna jumped up. “Are you coming?”
“Try stopping me,” I replied, “but before you go. Merry Christmas, I love you.” I kissed her gently.
She r
eturned my kiss. “And I love you too, now unless you want them nagging at us, get out of that bed.”
“Come on, Daddy,” one of the girls shouted, and we both chased after them, down the stairs and into the front room.
The girls squealed with delight when the doors opened.
It was magical. Piles of presents all beautifully wrapped, and the Christmas Tree lights twinkling in the background.
I’d crept down earlier and ate the mince pie, tipped the milk down the sink and placed the carrots back in the fridge ready for peeling and chopping.
“Wow,” I said. “You must have been very good girls this year.” But, I could have done a cartwheel and they wouldn’t have cared – they were transfixed by the mound of wrapped boxes.
“Come on then,” I said, holding my hands out. “Let’s see, which presents belong to who?”
Jenna grabbed her phone and turned the video camera on, wanting to record them.
Within the hour, all their presents had been opened, but that wasn’t all of them. Lunchtime would soon come around and various grandparents, aunties, uncles, cousins and godparents would descend with a pile more–the girls were extremely lucky indeed.
Jenna and I decided to save opening our presents until this evening. When the girls went to bed, it would be our time. I hoped she would love the diamond ring I’d bought for her.
Chapter Twenty
By five pm, the girls were exhausted and ready for bed. I bathed them whilst Jenna sorted the mess in the kitchen. She was the messiest cook I’d ever known, and rather than clean as she went, a war zone of dishes, pans and cutlery waited for our attention.
I came down and Jenna was sitting on the sofa.
A bottle of red wine waited for me.
“Make mine a large one,” I said, not worrying about work, as I had two weeks off to spend with my family.
“Piggy,” she said, pouring the wine.
“Careful, or you’ll go over my knee.”
She leaned in and purred down my ear.
Till Death Us Do Part Page 5