by Ward, Alice
“I would like to know who the source is,” Gretchen snapped, pointing at the tag that read “unnamed source inside production.”
“I don’t know,” I murmured, trying to remember seeing any cameras. I hadn’t. I was sure of it.
The head producer was silent, his eyes just glaring into me as I tried to explain everything away. It was evident they didn’t believe me.
“This is just a big misunderstanding,” Aiden said, surprisingly on my side. I thought for sure he would believe the tabloids and accuse me of sleeping with Shep all along. My eyes filled with tears as I realized how guilty I truly was. These photos, these accusations, they were all true, at least they might as well have been.
“It doesn’t matter if it’s true or not, the real problem here is the image of the show,” Gretchen snapped. “And the integrity.” Her eyes flashed across the wrinkled bed.
“I didn’t do anything wrong,” I pleaded. “I promise.”
“You’ve really created a mess for yourself, and for our show.” Gretchen’s voice was brittle. “I should have known with your history that you wouldn’t be a good fit.”
I was going to throw up.
I heard her words, but couldn’t absorb them enough yet to be angry. I pushed through the tabloids, reading headlines like: Things Are Getting Hot on Extreme Cuisine, Steamy Reality Cooking Show Romance Caught, and Sexy Vixen Stirs the Pot to Get a Win.
“This is all bullshit, and you know it!” I yelled, tossing one of the tabloids across the camper.
“I know you were in Boston alone with Shep during filming, and I know you had him stay in your hotel suite. You wore a sexy dress and had dinner together. And now it’s plastered all over the world for everyone to see!” Gretchen screamed.
It freaked me out to see her so angry. She was always so calm, so professional and perky.
“I’m sorry, it isn’t what it looks like, and these people, this source is made up, or they’re flat out lying,” I argued.
“This doesn’t have to be a bad thing,” the producer finally spoke up.
I waited eagerly for his spin on this, hoping there could be some light shed on the horrible situation.
“I mean, there’s no denying you’ve created quite the reputation for yourself while on this show, whether you meant to or not,” he said. “So, all I know to do is to use it to our advantage.”
Gretchen seemed to nearly sag with relief as she stared at the producer. Then she smiled. “I like it.”
I still wasn’t sure what they were talking about, but I got the feeling it wasn’t going to be something I liked. “What do you mean?” I asked.
“I think by working the relationship drama into the show, we could have our ratings soar, and then there’s nothing secretive for the tabloids to report,” he said. “Why should they get all the attention for our story?”
“It’s not your story, it’s mine, and there’s nothing to tell!” I argued.
“I’m afraid it’s the only way we can put a positive spin on this,” Gretchen said, her eyes flicking down my body.
I spent enough time with Kennedy to know you always read everything you sign, and I’d spent a good deal of time reading my contract for the show before having her look at it too.
“Gretchen, I’m afraid that doesn’t put a positive spin on the show, it puts a negative spin on me and my life and that is unacceptable. I refuse to be a ratings rat for you,” I snapped.
“Claire, I don’t think you have much choice in the matter here,” Gretchen said sternly. “We can add a few shots of you and Aiden and have you both talk about the triangle that is creating the drama on the show.” She snapped her fingers. “Simple and easy.”
I fumed inwardly. “You’re talking about creating a scenario that doesn’t exist, that’s only in the air from pure rumor and speculation. It’s lying. I’m not going to pretend that I’ve been having some type of love affair with both Shep and Aiden. It will ruin my reputation.”
She didn’t even blink. “I believe your reputation is already smeared pretty good, sweetie, and that’s thanks to your little trip. The least you could do is help the show recover from the mess you made.”
“I’ll not film anything that doesn’t pertain to cooking or the cooking show,” I said with authority. “My contract states that I agreed to filming during specific hours, nothing more. Anything you’ve filmed of me that isn’t during the regular filming time should not and will not be aired, or I will bring you down quicker than a burning bridge made of toilet paper!”
They stared at me.
I added another nail to this particular coffin. “And, in case you were wondering, that includes filming others as they speculate on my personal life.”
Gretchen’s face burned red and her fists clenched against her clipboard. I wanted to laugh, but I didn’t. I’d channeled Kennedy through me, and it felt good. I knew I was right. Thank God I’d read my contract.
The producer tugged on Gretchen’s arm and whispered something in her ear. He smiled at me sourly and nodded. “You’re within your rights to refuse filming of anything other than the cooking show activities,” he said and pulled Gretchen from Aiden’s camper.
I watched Aiden stand and run a hand over his spiky hair. I sat there numb, uncertain what to do next. I’d flee, but I wasn’t sure my legs would hold me up long enough for that to happen.
To my further surprise, Aiden climbed on the bed and pulled me into his lap, nuzzling my neck. “It’s okay, baby,” he whispered. I was shaking from the anger and the embarrassment of it all. Kennedy was right; I was setting myself up for a bad reputation.
I was thankful that Aiden believed me, even though I didn’t know why he did. He had been so jealous, so territorial around Shep, and now that dozens of pictures were flaunted in his face showing us together in the same hotel, he was fine. I was so confused.
My thoughts drifted to Shep. I wondered how he was handling this.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
e
I hated that I had given my phone up to Gretchen upon my return to the show. I desperately needed to talk to Lauren or Kennedy. Aiden was being very sweet through all this drama. Almost too sweet. I kept thinking about Kennedy’s warnings not to trust him, and then Shep’s about him not being the man I thought he was. I had to be overreacting. He trusted me; that was all.
That was a good thing, right?
Shep had cornered me after filming one afternoon to discuss the tabloids and the source they had mentioned. “Have you seen Aiden talking to anyone on the crew?” he asked.
I didn’t know what that had to do with anything. “The source was probably made up.” I hugged myself tightly, feeling uncomfortable at being alone with him again.
“I just don’t trust him, Claire,” he said, his dark eyes filled with concern. “Someone had to know we’d be found together in Boston.”
“I didn’t tell anyone but Gretchen where I was going. After I left, I don’t know who she told, although everyone was asking about my friend when I got back, so she at least told them I’d had some sort of emergency.” I chewed my bottom lip, trying to remember anything else. “As far as Aiden and the crew, the only one he talks to is Lance, the cameraman.”
As I sat in my camper reliving our talk and all that had happened the past couple days, someone tapped on my door. I opened it to find Elle standing there holding a six-pack of bottled beer.
“Oh. I could use one of those,” I said, reaching for the carton.
Elle sat down on my bed while I pushed the beers into my fridge and pulled out two. I handed her one and sat down on the chair by my table and twisted off the cap. She watched me guzzle half of my beer down and then sighed. “I’m sorry you’re going through all this,” she said.
“Thanks.” My eyes focused on the bottle, reading the details on the label.
“I’m also sorry I haven’t been around much,” she added.
“It’s okay, I didn’t take it personally,” I told her. “It’s a
competition, right?”
Elle laughed and took a long sip of her beer. “Yes, it is, but it feels more like a soap opera at times.”
I laughed at her comment, and it felt good to release some of the tension I’d been holding. She smiled at me in the same way she used to and everything felt normal again. Just two girls drinking beers, chatting.
“So, what happened in Boston anyways?” Elle asked, and the happiness melted away.
I finished my beer and reached for another, unsure what to do or say. I met her eyes and could see her anticipation flowing from her pores.
Shit.
Would it really hurt to talk about this? It wasn’t like anything was a secret anyway. Plus, I needed someone to talk to, and since I couldn’t contact Lauren or Kennedy, Elle would have to do.
She listened intently as I told her about Shep showing up at the hospital. She opened her second beer as I continued my story, telling her how Shep confessed his feelings for me before Lauren and Asher showed up to save me from the awkwardness of the conversation.
“Why was he in your room?” she asked coolly.
“The marathon had the town booked up. I had a suite, paid for by Asher, and I was his ride to the airport, so I felt it was harmless. Plus, that agreement was made before he told me about his feelings.”
“So, if he’d confessed first, you would have let him sleep in the car?” Elle asked, with amusement in her voice.
I hadn’t really thought about it, but as she said it, I knew things would have been the same. I wouldn’t have turned Shep away to sleep in the car or under a bridge that night, regardless of what he had confessed or when.
“No, I guess not,” I admitted.
“So, you slept in your room, and he was on the couch?” she pressed.
“Eventually,” I answered.
“Eventually?” Elle pushed for more information.
I took a deep breath and finished my second beer. “Yes, things got a little heated at first,” I murmured. God, it felt good to get the secret out.
Her eyes widened even further, and her lips pushed into an ‘o’ as I told her about our exploit on the couch.
“Why didn’t you sleep with him?”
“Two reasons. One, he’s a judge, and I don’t want to win through favoritism.”
“And the other reason?”
“Aiden,” I said softly.
“But everyone thinks you did anyway, so you should have at least had some fun,” Elle insisted.
“But I would have known, and I couldn’t have faced Aiden if I had,” I said, feeling the guilt pressing me down again.
Elle stood up, a bright smile on her face. “You need to get out of here and quit sulking.”
I hunkered down further in my chair. “No, I don’t really feel like it.”
She pouted. “You sure?”
It felt good to get my story off my chest, but I still couldn’t help but wonder if I could truly trust Elle. She continued to urge me to tag along, leave the farm and find an adventure, but I knew how her adventures ended; with me walking home in the dark alone.
“No, I really think I just want to stay in. You go ahead and have fun,” I insisted.
Elle took the last swig of her beer and tossed the bottle in the trash can. “You can’t beat yourself up forever, Claire,” she said. “People aren’t perfect.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
e
The next competition was a double elimination, and with everything that had happened, I was feeling the pressure. Gretchen hated me. She made that clear each time she looked in my direction. The producer was cold when he filmed my commentaries.
Shep’s eyes always seemed to follow me, and I knew the others felt it too. I avoided direct eye contact with him at all costs, knowing that his dark brown eyes had some kind of spell over me. I couldn’t risk more drama.
Focus, Claire. Eye on the prize!
The competition was fierce, and I was extremely nervous as Shep did the usual introductions, and the lights from the cameras blared in my face.
We were asked to make our favorite dish, one that offered up a special memory in our life. Then the timer began, and I was rushing to the coolers and pantries, grabbing what looked good. I was working on autopilot, throwing together combinations that sounded wonderful in my mind. Then it hit me. Seared sea scallops, fennel risotto, charred baby tomatoes, and an heirloom vinaigrette. It was the exact dish I had at the Four Seasons with Shep.
Shep’s eyes widened in surprise when he stepped up to my plate. The guest judges were impressed and told me it looked as if it could be served in a five-star restaurant. I tried not to smile as I knew it actually had been. Shep seemed so pleased, and it was obvious he remembered that I ordered the dish with him. I wasn’t sure why I chose these particular foods. I honestly don’t think I considered it a special memory, it was just the only thing on my mind.
“Why did you choose this dish?” one of the judges asked. My chest tightened, and my throat became scratchy as I panicked for an answer, one that didn’t involve Shep. “I had this dish after receiving some very good news,” I said, not willing to give any more specifics.
Disappointment flared in Shep’s eyes at my response. Did he expect me to profess my love for him right there on camera?
Aiden and Derick both had strong dishes, but Elle and Janine were critiqued pretty hard by all the judges, even Shep. It wasn’t surprising when they were called down as the two going home, but it was bittersweet to see Elle leave the competition. Janine on the other hand, I was glad to see her go.
Bye Janine!
“You’re going to win this thing,” Elle shouted to me and waved as she climbed aboard the airport shuttle, then she gave Aiden a wink.
I looked at him, just in time to see him give her a look I couldn’t read. Then he turned to me and extended his arms with a playful look on his face. Since the cameras were off, I ran to him, and he lifted me from the ground in a celebratory twirl.
“We did it, top three,” he said cheerfully.
“What was that look you gave Elle?” I asked.
He looked at me funny. “Oh, nothing. Just a mean mug; kind of a way to say fuck you, but love ya,” he laughed.
I hadn’t realized they had gotten that close, but Aiden’s smile assured me it didn’t mean anything. We’d all gotten close over the past weeks, good or bad. Of course, my little escapades and rumors that flew through the set didn’t really allow me to get really close to anyone except Aiden and Elle.
Gretchen made an announcement that the fourth, fifth, and sixth place chefs would be returning to the show to assist in the next competition. I was relieved that Elle would be returning but felt a nasty nag in my stomach at the thought of being paired up with Janine.
She would sabotage me for sure if given the chance.
He leaned in and kissed me softly on the lips. “You and me baby, final two,” he said softly.
“Don’t get ahead of yourself,” I scolded. “Derick has proven to be pretty tough.”
Aiden rolled his eyes. “He’s nothing.” He gave me a wink as he walked towards his camper to pack.
Shep caught me before I made it to my camper. “Hey, I really liked the dish you chose.”
Our eyes locked, and I felt myself get lost in their depths. “I, uh, I, just couldn’t think of anything in the moment.”
His eyes softened, saddened, and they lost some of their grip on me. He ran a hand through his hair. “Well, I thought maybe it was because you had a good night that night.”
Dangerous things began happening low in my belly as I took in that glorious smile. He was a handsome man, an extremely handsome man.
I cleared my throat, pushing back the sudden emotion that wanted to shoot through me. “I’m sorry, I just couldn’t think of anything else, and it was the last good meal I’d eaten.”
It took everything inside me to turn and walk away.
I could feel his eyes burning through me. I knew he was aware I’d lied
about the dish. I did have a good night that night, that wasn’t something I could deny. But it was over, and I was back with Aiden, where I belonged.
My camper looked empty as I packed my last bag. I started to zip the large case when I realized the boutique bag from Four Seasons was hanging out of the edge. I pulled it out and peeked inside at the sexy blue dress. I ran my hand across the silky material and closed my eyes. I could feel Shep’s hand on my lower back, his breath on my neck and his eyes on mine. There was something about that man, something I needed to avoid.
I shoved the bag into the suitcase and zipped it tightly. I pushed open my door and dragged the cases down the two small steps and onto the ground. Aiden smirked and reached for my large case. “You really need to learn to pack lighter,” he teased. “What would you do without me here?”
I laughed. “Well, for one, I would get more sleep,” I teased back.
“I don’t think you mind missing out on sleep, darlin’,” Aiden said with a wink. I blushed. He was right. Even with all the emotional complications, I needed our long nights in each other’s arms. Now that I wasn’t worried about what anyone thought, we spent most of our nights together, and no, we didn’t sleep much.
Just three of us on the airport shuttle felt eerie but exciting. I could see the ghosts of all the past contestants — their smiles, their frowns, their accusing glares. Yeah, I wasn’t missing any of them, except for one. I wondered what Elle was doing, and if they’d told her she was returning for next week’s competition.
Gretchen told us there would be a challenge to compete for the order on how we selected our partners. I needed to choose first because I wanted Elle. Janine would ruin me. Sam was incompetent, so Elle was my only real chance at making it to the final round.
I looked at Aiden and then at Derick, wondering if Derick could actually beat out Aiden, or possibly even me. Aiden had the most experience between the three of us, but Derick had pulled some amazing dishes out of nowhere here lately. I knew I needed to step up my game if I wanted to win this thing. The thought of competing against Aiden scared me, not because I thought I would lose against him, but because of what it might do to our relationship if I did actually win.