Shapes of Autumn (Boxed set, books 1 - 5)

by Veronica Blade

  Zack leaped off me and flattened himself against the far wall. Putting his head down, he squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath. “Oh, God, you’re right. I’ll wait for you in the car.” He grabbed his shirt off the floor and disappeared.

  “Uh, okay.” Yeah, I was trying to be practical but he didn’t have to run from me like I had the plague.

  I hurriedly finished getting ready, locked up the house and got in the passenger side of my car. After putting on my seatbelt, I glanced his way when he still hadn’t started the car. “Are you upset with me?”

  His jaw tightened. “No, of course not. I’m the one who let it go too far. God, I can’t believe that I have so little control that I almost put us in a vulnerable position.”

  “Zack, it wasn’t all your fault. I was there too, you know.”

  “But I started it. Autumn, we can never be alone in your house again.”

  Damn, we had zero privacy anywhere else. “You’re missing the point, though. We did resist and we’re okay. Everything’s fine.”

  “Next time might end differently though.” He started the car, shaking his head. “Never again.”

  I flinched at his tone, then turned to stare out the window. It was a ten minute drive to the hospital and we spent half of that time in silence before he pulled over and pivoted in his seat. Looking down, he absently scratched on the fabric of the car seat with his index finger.

  “I want you, Autumn. Like really want you — as you could tell. So this isn’t me trying to push you away. But it’s just plain stupid to risk our lives this way. I can’t put you in danger like that.”

  Fresh from my bedroom victory — I mean, what girl wouldn’t want that kind of a reaction from a guy? — I shouldn’t have been so sensitive to what sounded like a prelude to dumping me. Again.

  I stiffened.

  Chapter Ten

  “Where are you going with this, Zack?” I wasn’t sure I really wanted the answer.

  “We’re in too deep. We have to stop.”

  Not even a week had passed since he’d agreed not to push me away again. “Zack, you promised!”

  “That was before we killed a scout,” he said. “When Charles doesn’t check in, others will come looking for me. I’ll plead ignorance and point out how much weaker I am, that I couldn’t have killed him. They’ll buy that. But with more werewolves around, your chance of being discovered increases dramatically.”

  I held up a hand and glared at him. “I’m sorry, but I’m still stuck at the part where you broke your promise.”

  He turned away and leaned against the headrest, sighing. “That’s not it at all. I’m still here, and I still want to be with you. I just think we need to do things differently from now on.”

  “And how’s that?” I tilted my head, narrowing my eyes.

  “For one thing, we shouldn’t go running together anymore. Telling Charles we were there to make out worked with him, but it might not work on the next guy. I’ll run alone from now on.”

  “Okay.” I didn’t love the idea, but if only one of us could go, it needed to be Zack. I didn’t know how long I could stay in my human form, but I had a feeling it was a while. “What else?”

  “People can’t know we’re together.”

  My brows scrunched in the middle and I twisted in my seat to face him. I really didn’t like where this was going. “Because of Charles? He’s dead. We don’t have to worry about him anymore.”

  “No, but there will always be other werewolves. Renzo is proof of that.” He bumped my knee with his knuckle and softened his voice. “All Charles had to do was get close enough to you and he figured it out.”

  “So we can’t hang around together? Ever?” My chest tightened. Maybe Zack was about to break up with me after all. “Is that what you’re saying?”

  Zack shook his head. “Not exactly. They’re more lenient with new recruits and you’re my cousin’s girlfriend’s best friend. We can’t help but get thrown together now and then. But we can’t be a couple in public. It’s too risky. And it’s just smarter if everyone thinks we’re only friends, even our friends and family. Otherwise, it could get messy.”

  But being apart could get messy too. “Because we’d have to explain to Trevor or Maya why we’re pretending to break up.”

  “Exactly. Too complicated and too easy to slip up.”

  I pursed my lips and cast him a sideways look. “It feels like you’re dumping me.”

  In one swift movement, he cupped the back of my neck and dragged me against him. Holding tight around my waist with his other arm, his mouth ravished mine until I was dizzy. My entire body tingled and I was pretty sure my eyes were glassy as he withdrew and breathed against my cheek, “You’re still my girlfriend.”

  That was just the reassurance I needed to hear. I melted and rested my forehead on his shoulder.

  Wait a minute… I covered my mouth to stifle a giggle.

  “What’s so funny?”

  “Before, we pretended to date, but we weren’t even friends. Now we’re actually together, but we’ll be acting like we’re not.”

  Zack smiled for the first time since the bedroom incident.

  “So far your plan doesn’t seem too bad, I guess. What else?” I asked.

  “You need to get better at sneaking in and out of my bedroom window. If my family knows you’re doing it, so will a werewolf.”

  At least he still wanted me to do that.

  “And it might be a good idea to have lunch away from each other now and then.”

  “Okay.” I’d have to go all day without kissing him and some days sit at another table? Ugh. “Anything else?”

  “Yes.” He turned the key in the ignition and resumed driving. “Sometime over the next couple days, we need to have a big fight and break up in front of everyone. Like… tonight during prom.”

  So soon? “No, I don’t want to ruin our prom. Let’s wait until Monday. Do it in the cafeteria or something.”

  “Autumn,” he began, shooting me a quick glance before making a turn. “This is serious. The sooner we break up, the safer you’ll be. For all we know, someone could be looking for Charles now. Who knows how often he checks in? What if they’ve already noticed he’s missing? Someone could show up tomorrow.”

  Everything was happening way too fast and my already limited time with Zack was getting even shorter. I groaned. “If we do it too fast, they’re not gonna buy it.”

  “You’re probably right. Maybe we should have a little fight tonight at prom, then hang out with Maya and Trevor Sunday and have another one,” he suggested. “That way it won’t be such a surprise. I don’t want them too freaked out.”

  “Brilliant.” At least he was thinking things through and I could relax and enjoy my prom. Except for a small fight. “Which reminds me, I can’t stay long at the hospital. Maya’s meeting me at my house later. You know, we have to do our nails and hair and stuff for tonight.”

  † † †

  I eyed the Scrabble tiles staring back and me, which spelled V-O-R-T-E-X. I found the perfect place to play it too — on a triple word square with the R set at the end of D-A-N-C-E, which made a new word and gave me even more points.

  I’d won our last game by eighteen points and led this game with Favianne by a few less. With my current letters and us being near the end, she might not catch up. It didn’t feel right to slaughter her two games in a row.

  “I have crappy letters,” I said. “Maybe I’ll just skip my turn.”

  The smell of fresh brewed coffee tickled my nose, signaling Zack’s return.

  “Nice word,” he said from over my shoulder. “Mom, you’re going to get stomped on.”

  Her eyebrows flew up. “How interesting. Autumn was just complaining about her hand and threatened to pass.”

  Heat roared into my cheeks.

  Zack laughed. “What were you thinking? My mom is ruthless when it comes to games. You would’ve regretted it.”

  “Do it,” she ordered. �
�Take your turn. Zack, make sure she plays that word.”

  I laid the tiles one at a time and counted up my points. When I finished, she made a seven letter word, getting bonus points for using them all. Zack was right — crime wouldn’t have paid.

  He set the cardboard tray of lattes on a chair. “I’m going to see what’s taking so long with the release papers. Be right back.”

  Too intent on my letters, I waved good-bye without looking. This time, my tiles really did stink. After searching the board for a place to play, I finally made a word.

  “That’s the best you can do?” she asked, smothering a smile.

  I sighed. “Yes, all my letters are one-pointers. I promise.”

  She nodded and studied her own letters.

  “I was wondering…” I hesitated and reached for my coffee, taking a big gulp. “I’m not sure if it’ll bother you to talk about this but…”

  She abandoned her task and looked up. “You won’t know unless you ask.”

  “How did Zack’s father die?” Immediately, I regretted the question and making her relive it. “If it’s upsetting to talk about it, though, you don’t have to tell me.”

  “I can talk about it. With you.” She inhaled and looked out the window. “We were camping one night, just a few miles from here. Lucio went searching for firewood while I stayed in the tent. He was gone for over a half hour, so as soon as I heard the growls, I knew something wasn’t right. I ran to him as fast as I could, but it was too late.” She shivered.

  “He was already gone?” I asked.

  “Not yet, but the bear still had him and was gnawing on his neck. There was so much blood everywhere. Even if I’d somehow gotten rid of the bear, Lucio wouldn’t have made it. No one could have survived that.” Favianne’s eyes clouded with tears. “The bear dragged him away and I never saw him again.”

  That was the last image she had of Zack’s father, the man she loved. My heart ached for her. “They never recovered his body?”

  “No. Not a trace. I called the police right away. They said scavengers probably got the rest of him.” Her eyes shone with tears and she blinked them away.

  Had he been eaten, like how I ate Charles last night? He may have been a wolf at the time, but he was also part human. I’d eaten parts of someone who was also human. I hadn’t thought about that aspect of it until now. Human.

  “I’m so sorry.” My stomach churned.

  Yep, it had finally sunk in. A torrent of revulsion rose up in me and I knew I was going to hurl. “Be right back.”

  Forgetting there was a bathroom in her room, I scrambled out the door and booked it down the corridor. I found another restroom, grateful for single occupancy. I locked the door, dashed to the toilet and puked up my breakfast and all the coffee I’d just drank, until I was heaving up yellow goo.

  Standing, I wiped my mouth with tissue and breathed deeply. If I ever found myself in that situation again, I’d be very sure not to eat my opponent. At that thought, I felt sick again and bent over.

  Finally, I stopped convulsing. After rinsing my mouth and splashing my face, I finally left the bathroom. Zack was waiting for me in the hallway.

  “Are you okay?” He felt my forehead and scanned my body, then finished the examination by sniffing me. “Sick?”

  I nodded.

  He narrowed his eyes. “But that doesn’t happen to us. Ever,” he said quietly. “What’s going on?”

  “When I was a bear, I didn’t care. But now…” I shivered, grimacing. “I ate Charles.”

  Zack folded me into his arms. “It was him or us.”

  I crumpled against him. “Why can’t we just be normal? Worry about what to wear to prom instead of wondering when a scout will turn up to kill us.”

  “Sorry, baby.” His arms tightened around me a moment before he stepped back and skimmed his fingers down my arm. “Go finish your game and I’ll follow up on the release papers. We’re just waiting for the doctor to sign off. It should only be a few more minutes.”

  I nodded and returned to my chair in Favianne’s room.

  “I didn’t mean to upset you.” She shot me a worried look.

  “No. It wasn’t that,” I lied. “Just something I ate. No big deal. Did you take your turn yet?” Getting off the subject would probably be a good thing.

  “No, I was too concerned about you.”

  “I’m fine.” I was absolutely certain my smile was convincing.

  She returned to her letters and picked up a tile, then she put it back. “It’s still hard to believe my Lucio is gone. A few years ago, I imagined seeing him in a crowd. He looked straight at me. I blinked and when I focused again, no one was there. Just wishful dreaming I guess.”

  “Does Zack know you saw him?” My intense curiosity would probably seem odd to her so I fiddled with one of the tiles to appear casual.

  She shook her head. “It wasn’t my Lucio — just my imagination. He’s dead. I saw him die.”

  I nodded. “You never told Zack?”

  Favianne smiled. “About my wild imagination? Heavens, no. Zack was devastated when he lost his father. We rarely talk about him.”

  “Does Zack know how he died?”

  “No and I’d appreciate you not telling him either. I don’t want that image in his head. You didn’t even know his father and look how you reacted.”

  “It was just something I ate. Really.” It was true, except in this case, it was the memory of something I’d eaten. I shuddered as my stomach turned again. “So how does Zack think he died?”

  “A very bad car accident.”

  I was surprised Zack had bought that story. I couldn’t imagine a werewolf being easy to kill that way, unless it was a really grisly accident. Regardless, Lucio was dead. Because, surely if he were alive, he would have made his presence known, at least to his son. Either way, Zack didn’t need false hope.

  “So… you’re feeling better?” she asked me.

  “Yes, I’m fine. I felt nauseous, but it passed.”

  She studied my face a beat, then spoke hesitantly. “It’s not… morning sickness, is it?”

  “What?” I prayed to God she didn’t mean what I thought she meant.

  “Is it possible you might be, uh, pregnant?”

  My eyes widened and my jaw dropped to my chest.

  She shrugged. “I have to ask, sweetheart and you’re in the right place to find out. A blood test will tell us, even if you’re not very far along.”

  “You’re sprung, Mom.” Zack entered the room, proudly brandishing several pieces of paper. “A nurse will be here in a minute to wheel you out.”

  “Zack,” I said. “Your mother thinks I was throwing up from morning sickness.”

  He frowned. “Morning sickness?”

  Favianne raised her eyebrows at Zack.

  His face went white. “Mom, it’s impossible. Trust me.”

  She didn’t look convinced. “We’ve talked about protection and you know how important it is but, accidents happen. You can talk to me.”

  Zack shook his head. “Mom, please. Just drop it. We haven’t progressed that far in our relationship. I swear. And that’s all I’m going to say about it.”

  Her smile faded and I thought she looked disappointed. I wondered what it must be like for her to know she wouldn’t live to see any grandchildren born. Zack and I were too young for that, though, and we had way too much going on. And, of course, we’d only known each other a few weeks.

  But did I want to have children with Zack some day?

  Absolutely.

  I squelched the feelings rising up. Weird emotions — like wanting to have a baby with him right away, just to watch the joy on Favianne’s face.

  I pushed that thought from my mind.

  Chapter Eleven

  “Wow, Maya.” Her dress was to die for. The exquisite beaded halter top dipped low in the front with a long, pleated pink chiffon skirt. “Trevor’s going to faint when he sees you in this.”

  Maya laughed.
“I hope so. Right about when Zack keels over at the sight of you in that lacy cream number you’ll be wearing.”

  “Oh, I traded that in a few days ago. Forgot to tell you.”

  She gave me a startled look. “Why’d you get rid of it?”

  “Because I bought it to wear to prom with Daniel. I don’t want to think of him while I’m with Zack. Ew.”

  “I don’t blame you.” She jumped onto my bed and grinned. “Let’s see the new one.”

  I disappeared into my closet and reappeared a moment later. After unzipping the bag, I pulled out the dress and held it in front of me.

  “I liked that cream dress, but blue will go much better against your olive skin.” Maya fingered the shimmering fabric. “Love that it’s strapless. Super sexy.”

  “My thoughts exactly.” I smiled.

  “Try it on,” Maya demanded. “Maybe it will give me some inspiration for what to do with your hair.”

  Humoring her, I let the robe drop to floor. I stepped into the dress and faced the mirror while Maya zipped me up. No bows, ruffles, layers or folds. Just elegant simplicity that gently molded to my waist and thighs before draping luxuriously around my ankles. Faint slashes of silver covered the length of the gown like silver rays of sunshine and a sprinkling of darker blue sequins made the fabric come alive.

  “Totally classy,” she said when I twirled for her. “And really shows off your smokin’ bod. Zack won’t even be able to stutter like when you wore that purple dress on our double date. He’ll go straight into a heart attack.”

  I giggled. “It has matching gloves that go to my elbows.”

  “Zack’s a dead man.”

  † † †

  I’d been saving pictures of hair and makeup for the last few months, just waiting for the day when we would put those ideas to use. Other girls paid professionals to pamper them before prom, but Maya and I enjoyed doing our own hair and makeup. As particular as we were, we’d probably backseat drive the professional and drive her crazy anyway.