Shapes of Autumn (Boxed set, books 1 - 5)

by Veronica Blade

  “Me too,” she whispered. “But we could still be together if I joined SWAAST.”

  I rested my forehead against hers. “Allowing that would be the most selfish thing I could ever do. You’re safer with your parents.”

  “But I’m happier with you.” She cupped my cheek, her lashes sweeping up so her gaze could meet mine.

  Happier with me… I could feel my heart expanding. When she’d almost died last month and I’d finally admitted to myself I was in love with her, I didn’t think I could love her any more. I’d been so wrong. I loved her ten times more now, and I didn’t want to imagine my life without her.

  But I couldn’t say that to Autumn or she’d fight even harder to be with me, and then her chance at living a long and healthy life of freedom would be gone. The deeper she got into me, the more dangerous her life would become.

  “Happier with me, huh?” I flashed a mischievous grin. “Imagine how happy you’re going to be all night.” And then I tossed her onto our bed.

  † † †

  Right after breakfast the next morning, Cedric ushered us out of the suite and into the gym. With word out that he was not only protecting four werewolves, but also training some of them for battle, the dissidents could strike at any moment. Autumn and I needed to be ready.

  We’d been at it for hours now, me dodging Renzo’s attacks and Autumn fending off Alura. It made sense for Alura and Renzo to train with us in order to free up Kayla. She needed to concentrate on her real job—security. But why did I have to get stuck with Renzo?

  I sailed across the room and smashed into the wall. Drywall crunched against my shoulder, and I crumpled to the floor. Groaning, I checked to see if I could feel my spine. I wanted all the battle training I could get, but did I really need my ass handed to me over and over? He was supposed to be teaching me to fight, not humiliating me.

  I refocused on Autumn and Alura across the room. Autumn was kicking a punching bag, not getting a smackdown. I would’ve pushed to switch trainers, but I didn’t want Autumn to get stuck with Renzo. I’d have to tough it out.

  “You’re acting on your emotions again.” Renzo zoomed to me and held out a hand. Pretending his outstretched hand didn’t exist, I scrambled to my feet. “If you had taken a moment, you would’ve noticed I was anticipating you using your legs,” he said.

  “Whatever.” I turned away from him. “I need a break.”

  “No, you don’t. You’ve already healed. There’s no reason for us to stop.”

  Fury rose up in me and I rounded on him. “Maybe I don’t like getting the snot knocked out of me every five minutes. Ever think of that?”

  “Then maybe SWAAST isn’t the place for you,” he countered. “If you can’t take a beating and you’re going to give up so easily, maybe you should go with Autumn. Just keep running from every fight. Seems to be what you’re good at.”

  I swung at him and he twisted my arm, pulling me down to my knees.

  “This is life and death, Zack. We’re only as strong as our weakest member.” Renzo released me and shoved me away. “Being impulsive won’t help our cause. When you act, think it through and make sure it’s right. Lives could be depending on it.”

  Renzo was on our side—I knew that. But it sure didn’t seem that way now. “If you don’t want me to join, then say so.” I hoped he wouldn’t. I needed to be a part of SWAAST. Once Autumn left, I’d have no purpose. I didn’t think I’d survive without a goal, something to fight for.

  Renzo paused, taking a long moment to study me and I prayed he wouldn’t send me away. He’d been acting like a douche bag since we’d stepped into the gym, and I couldn’t figure out why.

  “Why are you so mad at me?” Renzo actually had the balls to look baffled.

  Seriously? I was damn near positive that Renzo was hiding something. I just didn’t know what and I had little faith he’d cough anything up. I stuck my hands in my pockets, wondering why he had ever been in my neighborhood in the first place. “I could ask the same of you. You’re not making things easy and you could leave anytime.”

  Renzo swiveled away, giving me his profile. He didn’t utter a syllable for so long I thought I’d gone too far. “Yes, I’m free to leave and I’m confident I could handle any vampires who may follow. But I need good, honest people to join the cause.”

  He faced me again, his eyes stormy, giving him the appearance of being more than a little dangerous. “I’ve lived hundreds of years, Zack, and it wasn’t by taking chances. You’re young and smart and you could have an amazing future, yet you’re throwing it away on a girl who you can never truly be with, someone who will surely endanger you.” He tapped my head. “You think with your emotions, but it’s going to get you killed.”

  I could never truly be with Autumn in the normal way. But sex or no sex, I wasn’t letting her go yet. Secretly, I hoped she would insist on leaving with me and refuse to take no for an answer. But even as that hope budded in my chest, I knew I was a total jackass for wishing it. “I’m guessing you won’t be thrilled if she decides to join SWAAST.”

  “Maybe you should discourage her.” He let out a frustrated growl. “Being with her will make you weaker, and I don’t mean that in the physical sense.”

  “So I should go through life never getting close to anyone? I could do that,” I paused, knowing my next words were going to piss him off, “But then I’d end up like you.”

  His gaze wavered, but he recovered quickly and then his face was once again emotion free. “I think that’s enough practice for now,” he said softly. “Between what happened with your mom and the vampires after you, it’s been a rough few days. You and Autumn should take the evening off. Maybe decompress in front of a movie or something.” He gestured toward the exit. “Let’s get dinner started.”

  He wasn’t angry like I’d been expecting. He seemed more defeated than anything else. And him not taking the bait gave me no outlet for my rage. Tears burned behind my eyes.

  “Hey, Zack?” Renzo brushed my shoulder. “Things are going to get better. I promise.”

  I doubted that. Renzo acted like less of a jerkface for an entire five seconds though, so I’d take what I could get. At that moment, gratitude flooded through me over the idea of getting some time to chill with Autumn and not having to worry about anything else. He’d been right about the past few days, and I missed my mom like crazy. I couldn’t think of anyone who could fill that void better than Autumn.

  And once Autumn was gone, I’d have no one.

  Chapter FOURTEEN

  Autumn

  During our brief respite, Zack and I didn’t talk about Renzo or joining SWAAST or me going off with my parents. Once I’d checked in with Maya and my mom, Zack and I just snuggled in bed and let ourselves get absorbed into a movie, as Renzo had suggested.

  His act of kindness wouldn’t be forgotten. Not that I liked him any better, and I sure as hell didn’t trust him, but he’d get a pass next time he acted like a douche. Which would probably be soon.

  We woke the next morning to the real world and another day of training ahead of us. Bright and early, Dathan escorted us out of the king’s suite and down to the first floor. We spotted several vampires as we traveled the staircase and the long corridor. Each sent us suspicious looks ripe with hostility. I’d never been more grateful for Dathan’s presence.

  “Lock up after I leave,” he said as soon as we reached the sanctuary of the gym. “I’ll make sure Kayla is monitoring the cameras.” He made a circle in the air, apparently meant to include the various cameras in the large room. “If all else fails, you can contact me telepathically. Won’t take me long to get here.”

  “We’ll be fine and I’m sure you’re needed elsewhere.” Renzo didn’t even glance at Dathan as he headed toward the weapons wall, and I cringed. Leave it to Renzo to be rude to the one vampire he should never cross.

  “As always, no one is holding you captive.” Dathan’s eyes cut to the exit. “There’s the door.”

 
“Thank you for getting us here safely,” I said before Renzo could irritate Dathan further. “We appreciate it.”

  “Uncle Renzo,” Alura began, obviously trying to distract him, “shall we get started?”

  As Dathan slipped out, I wondered what evils Renzo would unleash upon Zack this time. I suggested we change training partners, but Zack wouldn’t hear of it. As it turned out, thankfully, Renzo and Alura worked with both of us at the same time, which kept Zack from being Renzo’s bitch and eliminated the need for Zack to avoid him.

  Renzo showed us a couple of choke holds and how to wrestle out of them, as well as a few other combat tricks, and later we met in the king’s chamber after dinner for a much needed regrouping.

  “Your Majesty, our coven is not happy at all,” Kayla said from her usual spot in the overstuffed chair in front of Cedric’s desk. “It seems everywhere I go, people stop talking. I don’t scare easily and I can take care of myself, but knowing there are those among us who could attack at any moment is a bit trying.”

  That was putting it mildly.

  Cedric leaned back in his chair and glanced at Dathan, who was picking lint off his black pants. “Suggestions, Dathan?”

  “No.” He didn’t bother making eye contact with anyone.

  Cedric ground his teeth and swiveled in his chair toward Kayla. “Add a few more hidden cameras outside this suite and on the perimeter walls, then send the feed to my computer, as well as yours. I want to make sure we can follow the trail if anything happens.”

  He refocused on the back of the room. “Tony, I’ll need you to be more diligent than ever. No one comes onto the estate without my approval, and no one leaves without my knowledge. Monitor for unusual groupings, people doing things they normally don’t, any vampires lingering where they shouldn’t be.”

  “Do what you have to do and don’t worry about us.” Renzo considered Zack a moment, then switched to me. “If we stay together, we’ll manage on our own.”

  Dathan yawned. “Four of you against twenty-something vampires?”

  “We’ll bite anyone who comes near us and then run.” Renzo’s lip curled up. “We’ve survived that way for centuries under worse odds than this.”

  Cedric hurled a hard look at Dathan and Renzo from his seat behind the desk. “I’d be more comfortable if you all had backup. Dathan will accompany you anywhere you need to go.”

  “Can he handle himself?” Renzo asked. By his lack of faith, he couldn’t have a clue who Dathan was.

  “The attitude is probably, uh, a little misleading.” I nodded toward Dathan who was still staring out the window. I wasn’t sure if he was even paying attention anymore. “He could probably take out ten vampires by himself.”

  “Because I’d so rather kill my own kind than filthy werewolves,” Dathan muttered, then glanced our way. “No offense.”

  Renzo’s fingers gripped the armrest of his chair. “We’ll take our chances alone, but thanks for the offer, Your Majesty.”

  Knowing we need a change in atmosphere, I stood. “Isn’t it time to go out and morph?”

  “I believe it is.” Kayla rose too and exited, followed by Renzo, Alura.

  Just a second, I told Zack and hung back around the doorway, curious to see if Dathan would do something to make himself less of an ass.

  Cedric began on a long sigh and gave Dathan a once-over. “Why do you have to be like that? Renzo already doesn’t trust you.”

  “Because it amuses me.” Dathan arched one brow. “When you get this old, life can grow boring.”

  Eyes shrinking with annoyance, Cedric punctuated each syllable. “How can it get boring when you’re almost always slumbering?”

  Dathan flashed his friend a grin. “I’ll watch over the wolves and keep them safe. I promise.”

  What a jerk, I told Zack, and we bounded out of his suite and into the hallway. Behind me, the door opened and closed, and I could feel Dathan’s presence not far behind. Once we’d caught up to Renzo and Alura, Kayla resumed leading us out.

  Renzo’s arm bumped mine. You’re going to let Zack stay behind to be with you when he could leave with us and be safer?

  I thought you were staying anyway so you don’t get ambushed by the vamps. I snuck a peek at him walking alongside me.

  He shook his head. I’ve survived vamps for centuries. I could get Zack and Alura out of here and leave no trace for vamps to follow. I’m staying here for Zack. I think he’ll be a great addition to SWAAST. But if he keeps putting himself in danger for you, he’ll be dead and no use to me.

  I had no idea what Renzo was up to, but I wasn’t going to let him get away with blaming me for his being here. Cedric is your friend and you said you’d help him. You don’t want to abandon him.

  Renzo scoffed. Cedric will find his culprit whether I’m here or not. It just might take longer, which is better than losing a perfectly good SWAAST member.

  Was I putting Zack in more danger? I could join SWAAST and the four of us could leave. But my gut told me Renzo didn’t want me around. In any case, joining SWAAST wasn’t a decision I should make lightly and not a road I should go down without telling my mom and dad first.

  Now that I understood why my parents had been overprotective my whole life, I didn’t have the urge to push them away and I wasn’t ready to leave them yet. But it was either part with them or let Zack go. Either way, I’d lose someone. The urge to cry scorched my eyes.

  When we took the last set of stairs, a group of vampires, who I was pretty sure I hadn’t met before, hovered at the end of the atrium. They all scowled as we descended.

  On the last step, the group of vampires advanced. Kayla held up a palm and they halted. “No one comes near them. King’s orders,” Kayla said in a firm voice.

  “Why are they here?” a brunette asked.

  “They are all traitors to their own kind,” Kayla said, holding the line between them and us. “We’re hoping they can help us uncover the vampire killers.”

  “If they’re traitors to werewolves, they don’t have access to any information,” a large, sandy-haired male said.

  “True, but they know their own kind better than we do.” She nudged Zack and motioned me forward. “We’ll be on our way.”

  Another vampire, a tall lean guy not part of that group, appeared in our path. “Only you, Kayla, guarding four werewolves?”

  “Make a move,” Renzo grumbled, “and you’ll be the first one I bite.”

  “And I’ll drink you dry.” The vampire sneered.

  I wanted to morph into a bear and tear up the vamp just for being such an ass. “It’s hard to drink when you have no throat,” I hissed at him. “But we welcome you to try.”

  “All right, let’s go.” Tony joined us, sending the big vampire a hard look. “You keep your distance.”

  I could sense Dathan as soon as he was within five feet of us. His energy was unmistakable. “What the little wolf said.” He inserted himself between the vampires and the wolves. “I guarantee the only bloodbath happening in those woods will be yours,” he told the vampires. “You’ve been warned.”

  The big vampire stepped back and the others mimicked his actions. We continued and exited through the back door and kept going until we melted into the small spread of woods.

  Before we broke into a run, Renzo bumped my shoulder again. The longer we’re here, the less chance we have of leaving an encounter like that unscathed. Remember that next time you feel selfish and want to give in to your desires.

  Though I ignored Renzo to catch up to Zack, his words shadowed me, clinging to the edges of my mind. I didn’t appreciate how Renzo had pointed it out. But I had been selfish concerning Zack, so he wasn’t totally wrong.

  If Zack left with Renzo and Alura, I’d still have a few vampires protecting me. If I copped to being a shape-shifter, and they stopped believing I was a werewolf, maybe they wouldn’t want to kill me. My chance of survival was probably pretty good.

  We raced into the woods, the four of us mo
rphing as quickly as we could. None of us wanted to delay getting our fur on in case any of the vamps decided to test Dathan.

  Even if they opted not to challenge him tonight, there was still tomorrow and the next day.

  † † †

  As we headed back to the mansion from our long run, Kayla trailed behind, as did Tony and Dathan. I was the first to emerge from the woods, my eyes automatically locating the window to the king’s suite where he waited for us. A shadow flitted behind the curtains, and I wondered what Cedric was doing that required such speed.

  “We’d better get back to the suite,” Kayla said as soon as we morphed back into our human form. “We’re too exposed out here.”

  Once again, I zeroed in on the window above. Something was off; I felt it in the chill crawling up my neck. I rocketed to the side of the building and scaled the wall to the fourth floor. Even slipping a couple times where my feet couldn’t get purchase, I made it to the window in mere seconds.

  “Autumn!” Zack shouted.

  Ignoring him, I peeked through the slit between curtain panels and saw… what looked like Cedric’s shoes. But they were pointing up, as if he was lying on the ground. I couldn’t think of any reason why he’d be horizontal when people other than us were in his room.

  I thrust my elbow against the glass as hard as I could, shattering it. Having shaky footing, my balance wavered and I spilled inside. As I passed over the windowsill, an electrical current raged through me. I jolted and tumbled over a shelf, crashing onto the floor.

  I righted myself and morphed into a bear as three vampires lunged for me. Keeping my back to the wall, I flailed, my spastic paws flying wildly. My lack of control from the physical shock worked in my favor, because none of the vamps dared come closer.

  In my peripheral vision, Cedric lay on the floor with a dagger protruding from his heart. He wasn’t dead, I reminded myself. Only paralyzed. If I could get that dagger out of him, he’d be mobile again and free to help me. Maybe…