“It is.” Sylvan nodded. “The rule was instituted especially for situations like this, where the bride’s home planet is at war. If she is allowed free contact with her family and loved ones before she’s completely bonded to the warrior that calls her, delicate information may go astray and endanger everyone on board the ship.”
“But Jillian never said anything like that! She said they were turning a blind eye to it. That all the warriors were letting their brides use the Think-me.”
“They may be but only after being completely bonded.” Sylvan looked grim. “Only having a fully formed link with a Kindred mind can shield your thought messages enough to keep the Scourge from reading them.”
“What’s done is done,” Baird said heavily. “I will inform the Council of my new status and Olivia can go back on the first available shuttle.”
“What, just like that?” Liv could hardly believe her ears. “You go on and on about how much you love me and how we’re meant to be together and now you’re giving me up because I made a long distance phone call?” She knew she wasn’t being rational—after all, this was what she’d wanted from the moment Baird had first claimed her. But she couldn’t help feeling disappointed that after all his words of love and devotion breaking one little rule was all it took to end things between them.
“Please, Lilenta.” Baird shook his head. “Please know that I would never give you up willingly.”
“He has no choice,” Sylvan cut in. “The claiming contract is binding and specific. Failure to follow the proper protocol, especially in the case of a breach of that contract, could result in death for one or both of you.”
“What?” Liv felt cold all over. “Nobody said anything about being killed if you broke the rules. That’s crazy!”
“No, that’s war, Olivia.” Baird turned his head to look at her, his eyes flat and dead. “The Scourge are still out there and they’re able to intercept any unbonded Think-me transmissions.”
“They can read your thoughts?” Liv was appalled.
Sylvan nodded. “If there is an incomplete link they can. Most likely what they’re looking for is a way to harvest the emotions from such exchanges. They…feed on negative energy.”
“They feed on pain,” Baird said bluntly. “Too bad we’re not all on board their Fathership right now. They could be having a fuckin’ feast.” He sighed and ran both hands through his hair. “I’m sorry.”
“Me too.” Liv bit her lower lip. “Look, this is all just crazy. It’s not like Sophie and I were exchanging state secrets. She was just…just warning me about your mating scent.”
“Well you won’t have to worry about it any more.” Baird stood abruptly. “You won’t have to worry about anything outside of Earth anymore.”
“Baird, I—” she began but he shook his head.
“Please, Olivia—just get dressed and packed. Sylvan and I will be waiting outside.” And then he left.
Twenty-One
Baird felt as though someone wearing metal anti-grav boots had kicked him in the gut. Gone, she’s really gone. Gods, can’t believe I actually lost her and over something so stupid… He had taken the precaution of hiding his own Think-me but it had never occurred to him that Olivia would go use someone else’s. Hell, he hadn’t even known she had any friends on board the ship. Maybe you would have known if you’d asked. If you’d let her talk about her home and her friends more. But no, you were so eager to keep her focused on her future with you that you refused to hear about her past and now it’s too late. He knew it was true but all the self recrimination in the universe wouldn’t help now. Wouldn’t bring her back.
He and Sylvan were standing on the observation deck of the docking bay after seeing Olivia onto a shuttle bound for Earth. Baird had wanted to go with her for one last goodbye but Sylvan had convinced him it would be a bad idea. It would, too. If he’d gone down with her, Baird wasn’t sure he could have brought himself to leave her, even though she’d been fighting for her freedom from him from the moment he first called her.
At least she got what she wanted. She never wanted to be bonded to me, never wanted me as her mate. All she cared about was getting her old life back, seeing her sister every day. But if she wanted that so much, why was she crying when she said good-bye? Baird didn’t have an answer for that. He could still feel her soft, curvy body against him, could still hear her soft sobbing in his ears. When the time had come to go, she had thrown herself into his arms, trembling and saying, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” over and over again. Baird hadn’t had any words to give back to her—he was past words now. He’d only been able to hold her tight and press his face to her neck to breathe her sweet scent one more time. One last time. And then she was gone.
Gods, Lilenta… He was still numb and he knew it. It was like the feeling you got when you’d just been wounded in battle. Looking down, seeing the blood pour out and feeling nothing. But sooner or later the pain would come and when it did…When it does it’s going to fucking kill me, he thought in a detached kind of way. It’s going to make the worst torture the AllFather inflicted look like kindness and mercy.
“Baird…Brother, I am so sorry.” Sylvan was looking at him with concern in his eyes. Concern and understanding.
Was this how he felt after what happened on Tranq Prime? Baird stared at his brother blankly without answering.
“If you wish to talk about it…about how you feel…” Sylvan began hesitantly.
“How I feel?” Baird laughed harshly. “I’ll tell you how I fuckin’ feel. I feel like my hand just got cut off and I’m looking down at the bloody stump waiting for the pain to start. She was part of me, Sylvan—the best part. And she’s gone.”
“I know.” There was real agony in his brother’s voice now. “Forgive me, Baird. I blame myself.”
“Don’t.” Baird shook his head wearily. “It would have come out sooner or later, I’m sure. And if it had happened after we’d already bonded, well…”
“There’s nothing worse than a broken bond,” Sylvan murmured.
“I wouldn’t know.” Baird ran a hand over his face, hearing the sandpaper scratch of his rough cheeks against his fingertips. “But if it’s worse than this, I don’t wanna know about it.”
“Baird—”
“Forget it.” He shook his head and turned from the railing that overlooked the docking bay. “Look we should go. I can’t just stand here looking…looking at where she was. Thinking about…” He trailed off, shaking his head. Drunk. I need to get drunk. Maybe that would make this more bearable. To never see her again, to never hear her sweet voice, smell her warm scent…it was simply unbearable.
The loss felt like death and in a way it was—the death of everything that meant anything to him. Gods, how was he going to go on? He would have to file for a new place to live and maybe Sylvan would let him bunk with him until the orders went through. He couldn’t go back to the suite—it was filled with echoes of her. Memories of touching her, tasting her. Even now, he could still taste her salty-sweet honey on his lips, could still hear her cries and moans of passion as she pulled at his hair and bucked up to meet his tongue…Stop thinking about it. You’ll never see her again. Never touch or taste or smell or love her again.
“Excuse me, Commander Baird?” A new voice interrupted his thoughts and Baird looked up dully to see a young, unknown Tranq warrior standing in front of him.
“Yes? What do you want?”
The warrior looked uncomfortable. “The shuttle that just left—the one with your…with the Earth female on it?”
“What about it?” Sylvan snapped. “We’re leaving now. Make it fast.”
“Well…” The warrior swallowed nervously. “I’m sorry, sir, but it’s my duty to inform you that the shuttle didn’t reach Earth.”
“What?” Baird rounded on him, his pain spiking into fear. “What are you talking about? If it didn’t make it to Earth where did it go?”
“It was intercepted just now. By the Scourge.
”
* * *
Liv was so upset she barely noticed the jolting stop the shuttle made. It was different from the one Baird and Sylvan had flown her up on. There was an actual passenger compartment separated from the cockpit by an opaque black panel she couldn’t see through so she had no idea what was happening. Not that she cared—she was too miserable.
She tried telling herself it was stupid—that this was what she’d wanted all along. Sure it sucked that things had ended on such a bad note but then, leaving Baird was never going to be easy. And besides, she hadn’t wanted to stay with him, not really. It was only his scent manipulating her, making her think she wanted to stay. So then why do I wish I could turn this damn shuttle around and go back to him right now when I can’t even smell him? whispered the little voice in her brain. Why does it feel like I left part of me back there on the Kindred ship? Why does it hurt so much when I think of never seeing him again?
Liv tried to shut the voice up but it wouldn’t be silent. She just kept seeing the hopeless look in Baird’s eyes as he’d held her tight one last time. He hadn’t even said anything but then, he didn’t need to. She could see what was going on—he was dying inside from losing her. That was the real reason the Kindred didn’t do divorce, she finally understood. Because they couldn’t survive without their mates. She supposed it was a good thing she and Baird hadn’t actually bonded before she’d had to leave or he wouldn’t stand a chance. Maybe someday in the future he’d be able to find someone else, some other girl…
“I don’t want him with some other girl.” Liv put her head in her hands, trying and failing to hold back the tears. “I want him with me. Oh God, what’s wrong with me? Why does this hurt so much?”
“Look at this. We’ve only just captured her and she’s already crying.”
The strange voice from the cockpit of the small shuttle surprised her. Liv’s head jerked up and she found she was staring into a pair of wholly alien eyes. They weren’t the gold of a Beast Kindred or the pale ice blue of a Tranq Kindred or any of the varying shades of brown, green, or blue she’d seen in the few Twin Kindred she’d met. They were a deep glossy black that reminded her of a black hole—a place where even light couldn’t escape. As she watched a red vertical slit appeared in the center of each large iris and elongated alarmingly like a cat’s. Only no cat she’d ever seen had crimson and black eyes.
“Who…who are you?” she asked, finding her voice at last.
The eyes were set in a cold, calculating masculine face with skin the strange color of a dark grey pearl. The speaker had hair as black as his eyes which was pulled back from the stark bones of his face in a way that seemed to emphasize the cruel set of his mouth. More than that, Liv couldn’t see except that he wore some kind of cape over his shoulders. “Who are you?” she asked again since he hadn’t answered her the first time.
“I am your destiny. Are you mine?” He smiled coldly and nodded at someone out of her line of vision. “Get her out of there and bring her before the throne. She must be examined before any tests can be run.”
Throne? Examined? Tests? Liv was beginning to have an idea of what had happened and it was bad—really bad. This wasn’t Earth and her captor was like no kind of Kindred she’d ever seen although he appeared to be as big and muscular as any of the warriors she’d met. The Scourge. Somehow I’ve been taken by the Scourge. His next words confirmed her worst fears.
“Are you deaf? I said hurry. The AllFather is waiting.” He nodded impatiently and suddenly the passenger door of the shuttle was wrenched open and long-fingered alien hands were clamped around her upper arms.
“Hey, let me go!” Liv tried to kick but then someone grabbed her legs as well and she was being hauled bodily out of the shuttle. She struggled for a moment until she saw a body slumped on the ground beside the shuttle—it was the Tranq pilot who had been driving the shuttle in the first place. A puddle of blood under his head made it clear he wouldn’t be flying any more missions. The sight made Liv cold all over and she abruptly stopped fighting. It was no use anyway—the silent guards who held her—both of whom had the same grey skin as her captor—were too strong. And clearly they had no qualms about killing their captives.
The man with black and red eyes nodded approvingly. “Very good. I advise you to remain calm and not fight the situation. Your fear will only stimulate the AllFather and he is much less likely to be lenient when he is stimulated.” Standing up, out of the shuttle, he was even taller than she’d first thought. The black cape he wore covered his broad shoulders and fell to his calves, making him look positively enormous and even more menacing, if that was possible.
“What are you talking about? What does the…the AllFather want with me?” Liv forced herself to lift her chin and stare him in his strange red and black eyes, ignoring the silent guards who were still holding her.
“To see if you are the one.” He jerked his head at her guards and turned.
“The one what?” Liv protested as the two silent, grey-skinned guards dragged her along.
“The one who is prophesied.”
Though she was still scared to death, Liv was also getting frustrated. “Prophesied to do what?”
He turned his head and looked back at her. “That remains to be seen. Perhaps much, perhaps little. But either way you can be certain it will be less painful if you just submit.”
Liv opened her mouth to ask more questions and then closed it again. God, what was she going to do? They must have mistaken her for someone else. But how could she convince Mr. Tall Dark and Scary of that? And what would the AllFather do to her?
She remembered well the scenes from her dream-sharing with Baird. The cavernous shadowy room with the huge screen projecting his thoughts and memories. The glowing wires coming out of his skin…No, don’t think of that. Liv tried to concentrate on the scenery around her instead but it wasn’t much help.
The interior of the Scourge ship was dark and silent. The guards dragged her through claustrophobically narrow metal corridors which connected vast rooms filled with huge, complicated machinery. Liv saw more grey-skinned beings working on the equipment but none of them spoke a word, even to each other. They shambled about their tasks with their heads bowed like people working in their sleep. It was eerie—like watching a factory full of zombies. And what was the machinery for? Did it run the ship? Or was there some other purpose for the enormous, silent mechanisms she was seeing?
She was afraid to know the answer and anyway, she was only half interested in the question. Looming much larger in her mind was her eventual fate. What was the leader of the Scourge going to do to her when he found out he had the wrong girl? And who was the right girl, for that matter?
The trip seemed to take forever but it was still over much too soon. Before she knew it, they were standing in front of a pair of double doors that looked to be four stories high. The doors were dark grey metal with strange designs etched in glowing neon green. Liv wondered if the designs were some kind of decoration or alien script. She didn’t get a chance to stare at them long, however. The tall man with the black and red eyes made a curt motion with one hand and they swung open silently revealing a large round room.
A blast of something came out of the vast shadowy space—nothing tangible that she could see or smell but something nonetheless. To Liv it felt like her entire body had been stroked with a giant hand, one that was cold and clammy to the touch. A feeling of horror like nothing she had ever felt before filled her. A sense that whatever was behind those glowing green doors was evil and meant her harm.
Liv sagged in the guards’ grip, her knees giving way as a nameless dread filled her. Her mind was suddenly full of tragedy, darkness, death. She couldn’t go in there and face the source of those emotions which she understood instinctively weren’t really hers. Couldn’t come face to face with any being that was capable of causing so much fear and distress without even touching her—she just couldn’t.
“Do not worry about the fear
you feel—it is simply the AllFather’s aura,” her captor said casually, motioning for the guards to drag her inside the room. “He is one of the Old Ones and does not need a link to harvest emotions.”
Liv didn’t care what he needed to harvest—all she knew was that her mind kept filling up with that horrible, nameless dread, making it almost impossible to think. It was like someone was pouring black, cloudy water into her skull, coloring everything with its murky presence. “Please,” she whispered through trembling lips. “Please, no. I’m not who you think. There must be some…some mistake.”
“We shall see.” Her captor nodded at the guards. “Bring her before the throne and leave her there. The AllFather’s aura will keep her from trying anything rash.”
Her upper arms ached from where the guards gripped her as they dragged her across the threshold of the room and up a long, broad series of steps made of black stone. The fear made her legs too weak to work and she stumbled forward stupidly until at last, at the top of the steps, they let her go.
Liv collapsed in a little heap, a soft sob leaving her throat. Not since she was a little girl and had night terrors had she felt so helplessly frightened. But back then when she’d woken screaming in the blackness there had always been someone to hold and comfort her—her mother or father or Sophie. Now there was no one. She was lost, alone in the dark. No one loved her. No one would ever love her again… No, that’s not right. Baird loves me. I know he does.
The thought felt right in her head and it pierced through the haze of darkness that clouded her mind. It gave Liv the courage to lift her eyes and see what was sitting on the massive metal throne before her.
The throne was decorated in the same glowing green alien script that the doors had been and on it sat a being that seemed to be cloaked in robes made of shadows—the AllFather. When he—or it—moved, they roiled around it like smoke. In the deep recesses of its shadowy hood its eyes glowed a pure, pulsing red. More than that Liv couldn’t see—not that she wanted to.
Brides of the Kindred Volume One: Books 1-4 Page 31