“Who…what…?” Her voice was little more than a croak but it didn’t matter because her half questions weren’t answered anyway.
“Ssso thisss is the girl.” The deep, hissing voice seemed to make the dread she felt worse.
“This is she,” the tall man with the black and red eyes answered. Had Liv thought he looked alien and strange? He looked like a GQ cover model compared with the thing sitting on the throne. “We intercepted her shuttle on its way to Earth.”
“Excellent. Does ssshe have the mark?”
“I do not know. I brought her directly to you as you requested, Father.” The tall man stood impassively beside her, arms crossed behind his back. Either the enveloping feeling of horror didn’t affect him or he was so used to it, it didn’t bother him anymore.
“What are you waiting for, Xairn? Check her.” The AllFather raised one skeletal hand, his shadowy, smoke-like sleeve moving in dreamy slow-motion with the gesture.
“On your feet.” The tall man with the black and red eyes scooped her up and forced her to stand. He wasn’t unnecessarily rough but his hands on her were cold and impersonal, as though he was handling an inanimate object.
“Please, you have the wrong person. I don’t know who you want but I’m sure it isn’t me.” Liv clutched at his muscular arm to keep herself from falling over. His skin was cold but at least he didn’t exude that feeling of terror she felt from the AllFather.
“That remainsss to be ssseen.” The AllFather gestured again. “Check for the mark.”
“As you wish.” With no warning the tall man grabbed the V neck of the dark blue t-shirt Liv was wearing and ripped it open. Then he twisted her bra in one horribly strong hand, popping and shredding the elastic as easily as if it was paper to reveal her bare breasts.
It was so much like what Baird had done to her earlier in the unmated males’ area that Liv was momentarily stunned. Guess it’s my day to get stripped in public, she thought stupidly, staring down at her breasts, her nipples tight with fear. Then the reality of what had happened hit her and she tried to cover herself with her arms.
“There is no need for that.” The man the AllFather had called Xairn pulled her arms away easily though Liv was fighting with all her might to keep herself covered. “We wish only to see if you bear the mark between your breasts.”
“The mark of what?” Liv managed to ask through numb lips but he didn’t answer. Instead, he knelt in front of her and cupped her breasts in his cold hands, pushing them apart and studying the smooth skin of her chest and sternum carefully. Liv shivered under his touch but there didn’t seem to be anything she could do about it. At least he didn’t seem to be getting any pleasure out of the contact—his touch was as clinical and impersonal as a doctor’s. Finally he shook his head and let her go.
“I see nothing.”
There was a hiss of frustration from the being on the throne. “I thought ssshe was the one. The thought message you intercepted…”
“Showed much promise. However there is no mark and the prophesy says—”
“I know what it sssays.” The AllFather made an impatient gesture, his red eyes glaring.
“Except for the mark she fits very well.”
“Which is why we must be sssure. Ssstep back and let me taste her.”
“What?” Liv stumbled backward and would have gone head first down the broad, steep steps if Xairn hadn’t caught her.
“Be still, Earth female. The AllFather will not touch you. He means to taste your emotions, nothing more.”
Liv trembled in his grip. For one horrible instant she’d thought he meant to taste her the way Baird had. The thought of that…that thing on the throne with its boney scabrous hands and glowing red eyes between her legs was too much, too horrible. She would rather die than let it touch her so intimately.
Barely managing to stand upright, Liv clutched her torn shirt closed to cover herself. Despite Xairn’s promise that the AllFather wouldn’t touch her, it took everything that was in her not to collapse when he stood, shaking his smoke-like robes loose from the metal throne, and came toward her. If it touches me I’ll go crazy. I know I will—I won’t be able to help it.
But the AllFather didn’t touch her. He—it—as Liv’s mind kept insisting, came within a few feet of her and raised a hand to the level of her face. Then those glowing red eyes closed and the tasting began.
* * *
“I’m telling you, you can’t do this, Baird. It’s crazy—a suicide mission.” Sylvan glared at his brother.
“You think I don’t know that?” He nodded at Sylvan. “You gonna strap in or what?”
Sylvan frowned as he slipped into the shuttle and fastened the harness. “I can’t believe you got permission from the Council to do this.”
“Council member Shirafe owed me a life debt—I saved his son during the battle of Brenii—remember?” Baird shrugged. “He told me if I wanted to spend my debt this way I was welcome to do it.”
“But you’re not even bonded,” Sylvan protested as he engaged the shuttle’s engines.
“You think that matters to me?” Baird frowned at him fiercely. “I love her, Sylvan, bonded or not. Wouldn’t you have done the same for Feenah if you’d had to?”
“Of course,” Sylvan said instantly. “Even though she didn’t want what I had to offer I still would have given everything I had to make her safe.”
“Then you know how I feel.” Baird sighed and ran a hand through his hair as the shuttle lifted off. “Don’t you get it, Sylvan? This is what the priestess was talking about. I thought after all that trouble in the unmated males section that the danger was over. Thought the sacrifice I had to make was letting them see me mark my female.”
Sylvan nodded thoughtfully. A public marking like the one Baird had done was considered a humiliation but his brother had taken it in stride despite his bride’s defiant attitude. Not his bride anymore, he reminded himself. They’re not even bonded and still he’s willing to give up everything to save her. “I see,” he said neutrally, piloting the shuttle out of the docking bay.
“But that wasn’t it,” Baird continued as they left the Kindred ship behind. “This is. I can see it now and I’m fine with it. I want it.”
“How can you say that?” Sylvan burst out. “You’re going to your death.”
Baird shrugged, his broad shoulders rolling under the crimson uniform shirt. “I was dead anyway—the minute I saw her leave I felt it. At least this way it won’t take as long.”
“Baird, listen to me,” Sylvan said evenly. “I know how you feel—no one could know it better. But there is life after a failed bonding.”
“Yeah, but what kind of life?” Baird gave him a long, searching look. “I’ve seen you, Brother. Ached for your pain and admired your strength. But I just don’t want to go through that. If I can’t be with Olivia…” He shook his head.
Sylvan knew what he was saying. If I can’t be with Olivia, I don’t want to be at all. Baird would rather die than live in a universe where his love was denied him. It saddened Sylvan but didn’t surprise him. A Kindred male’s attachment to his female often bordered on the extreme and many warriors didn’t survive the loss of their chosen mate. Their father had been a rare exception but Sylvan was sure he had only carried on in order to care for his sons. Otherwise after the death of Sylvan’s own mother he surely would have taken his own life, as many Kindred did after a mate died. That was the real reason the Council had given their approval to Baird’s request—a warrior who lost a mate was already considered dead so in essence, they were incurring no new losses.
“I just wish…” Sylvan cleared his throat. “I wish I could help you as you helped me. I never would have made it after…after…” It was still difficult to say her name. “After Feenah if it wasn’t for you.”
Baird leaned over the console and gripped his arm. “I’m glad I could be there for you, Brother. I’m sorry it has to end like this.”
Sylvan gave him a tiny smile
. “It’s just three days. You might make it back.”
“We both know the odds of that.” Baird smiled back grimly.
They were rapidly approaching the Scourge Fathership. As the vast grey metal cylinder grew in the viewscreen a cold hand gripped Sylvan’s heart. He could only imagine how his brother must feel, returning to a place where he had been tortured and tormented. It must be hell and yet Baird wore a serene look on his face—a look that said nothing else mattered but Olivia. Wish I could feel that way for a female again, Sylvan thought. But he knew he never would. That part of his heart was broken beyond fixing and even if it wasn’t he had sworn a sacred oath to the Mother—an oath he never intended to break. “We’re here,” he said unnecessarily. “Their control room has accepted our truce signal.”
“Let’s go then.” Baird leaned forward as the entrance to the Scourge docking bay yawned open beneath them. “She’s been in there too long already. If he’s already gotten into her mind…”
We may be too late, Sylvan finished the thought in his head. But he didn’t say it aloud. Couldn’t bear to imagine his brother’s pain if the female he loved had been hurt beyond repair. They would just have to pray to the Mother that they were in time…
* * *
Liv shivered in revulsion as she felt the cold brush of an alien mind against her own. It was like spiders scuttling over her face—a loathsome, ticklish sensation that made her stomach lurch in disgust. Then the sensation went deeper and she felt him inside her brain. Cold hands with worm-like fingers were searching through her memories like an impatient secretary flipping through old fashioned paper files in a desk drawer. Every once in awhile they would linger on a certain memory—something embarrassing or horrifying or desperately unhappy—and examine it more closely. Liv gritted her teeth as she felt the corpse-cold fingers pick these bad memories up and fondle them like precious gems.
The time Sophie and I saw Miss Meow crushed under the neighbor’s truck…The last time we ever saw grandma alive with all those tubes and wires going in and out of her at the hospital…Opening the door to a policeman saying how sorry he was but we had to come down to the morgue and identify Mom and Dad after the drunk driver hit them…
It was all there, right down to the time in fourth grade when she’d had a crush on Patrick Phelps who told everyone he didn’t like her. The AllFather found each hurtful memory and tasted it thoroughly, tasted her pain and disappointment and humiliation as though it was a fine wine he was savoring.
Liv didn’t know how long it went on, only that after awhile she felt like she was going crazy. She tried to remember how Baird had said he was able to stand it—he’d been a prisoner here in this ship for six months. How had he kept his sanity with this hideous being rifling through his head?
He thought of me. He said I kept him sane—the link we had and the dream-sharing. Maybe if I think of him… Closing her eyes, Liv thought of him with all her might. She imagined him standing there in front of her—so tall and strong, his wild black hair and golden eyes filled with love and need. The way his body felt against hers when he held her close, the warm, spicy scent that filled her senses when she was with him. Suddenly her eyes flew open. God, he was right—I love him. How could I not see that before? How could I wait until now when I’m in a hopeless situation to realize that he’s what I want out of life? What’s wrong with me?
“What indeed?” whispered an icy voice in her brain. “Ssso you were bonded to the one who escaped me. Sssuch a pity…his pain was ssso unique and I never quite got all of it.”
Liv felt him in her head again, prying at her memories of Baird. But somehow, this time she resisted. “No, those aren’t for you!” She imagined erecting a wall around her time with Baird, a wall so high and thick he couldn’t scale it or break it no matter how he tried.
Soft laughter, like the rustling of bat wings filled her skull. “Ssso you resist? Very well, I ssshall break you later at my leisure. Depend upon it, little female.”
And then, as suddenly as he had invaded her mind, the AllFather was gone. Liv sagged in relief, nearly falling again. Resisting his prying attempts to see into her time with Baird had taken everything she had. She felt like she’d just run a marathon or swam a hundred laps in the pool.
The AllFather went back to its throne. “Her taste is prosaic but ssshe ssshould provide a few hours of entertainment at least. Hook her up to the viewer and I will review her memories. Her thought images may provide valuable insight.”
Liv had a sudden memory of the way Baird had looked in the dreams she’d had of him. Chained to a wall with a huge screen above his head and wires coming out of his skin. “No!” She turned to run but Xairn caught her.
“None of that. You belong to the AllFather now. He will do with you as he wishes and you have no say in the matter.”
“I have a say. The Earth female belongs to me so take your fuckin’ hands off her.”
At first Liv thought the deep, familiar voice must be an illusion. A cruel trick either of the AllFather or her own mind. She wanted so much to see Baird, to be with him. But surely he wouldn’t be able to follow her here—would he? Slowly, almost afraid to look for fear he wouldn’t be real, she turned her head and stared down the broad black steps. For a moment she couldn’t see in the dim room and then…
It’s true—he’s really here. But how—?
“Lilenta.” Baird came bounding up the steps and looked at the ragged remains of her shirt. “Did they hurt you?”
She shook her head. “No, nothing like that. He said they were looking for some kind of mark.” She nodded at the AllFather’s son who was still holding her and looking at Baird impassively.
Baird glared into the red and black eyes. “Thought I told you to take your fuckin’ hands off her.”
Xairn withdrew his cold hands but didn’t move an inch. “You are very bold for one who has so lately tasted the AllFather’s mercy.”
“Mercy, huh?” Baird spat at his feet. “That’s what I think of your mercy. I’m here to take Olivia home.” He took off his red uniform shirt and slipped it around her shoulders.
“And how do you propose to do that? You are one and we are many.” Red pupils narrowing to slits, Xairn put a hand to his side, fingering some kind of weapon Liv hadn’t noticed before. She tensed but then the AllFather was there, gliding silently toward them.
“Leave him. I sssensed him coming from afar. He has an interesting proposal.”
“His royal ugliness is right.” Baird glared at the AllFather. “I have a bargain for you—me for her.”
“What? Baird, no!” Liv put a hand on his arm but he shook her off and continued talking.
“You have a custom—krik-ka`re. The willing sacrifice of one mind-life for another. I wish to invoke it now.”
Xairn raised one black eyebrow. “It has been some years since we received such a request. You have been studying our culture.”
“If that’s what you call the twisted paths of pain your kind follow then, yes. I have.”
The AllFather stepped closer to Baird, its red eyes glowing. “The traditional time of krik-ka`re is just three days. Why ssshould I give up a tender morsel like this little Earth female for only three days of your pain?”
Baird lifted his chin. “You said yourself last time I was your guest that my pain had a unique flavor. But you never got all of it—you never broke through my shields completely.”
“And? Ssso?”
“So this time you won’t have to.” Baird swallowed but his face remained impassive. “I’ll give myself willingly. That means no shields, no attempt to block you out. You can have whatever you want with no resistance from me.”
“No!” Liv tugged at his arm but he only shook his head briefly and looked back at the AllFather.
“What do you say?” he demanded.
Xairn was the one who answered him. “You realize, of course, what you are offering. It is not just your life we are speaking of here but your sanity. No one has ever w
ithstood the AllFather’s complete and undivided attention for such a length of time and emerged with their mind intact.”
“I know that.” Baird gave a curt nod at Liv. “She’s worth it—to me anyway. To you she’s nothing but another energy cell, one you’ll use up and throw out in a matter of hours.”
“He presents a compelling case.” The AllFather sounded thoughtful. “I do find myself most hungry after the unsatisfying taste of the female’s mind.”
“But her memories,” Xairn objected. “You said they should be sifted in order to find the one we seek.”
The AllFather made a dismissive gesture that left a cloud of dark smoke-like particles boiling in the air. “There are other ways of finding the one. I am inclined to let her go if the warrior agrees to abide by the laws of krik-ka`re.”
“I agree,” Baird said at once. “Just let me see her to the shuttle where my brother waits and swear you’ll disable your magnetic field long enough for them to get away. Then you can do anything you want to me.”
The AllFather nodded, its red eyes glowing. “It is ssso agreed. My ssson and his guard will accompany you to be certain you uphold your end of our bargain. At the end of three days time your brother may return for you…if there is anything left worth returning for.”
Liv felt like her heart was about to burst out of her chest. “Wait a minute—nobody asked me if it was okay for Baird to trade places with me!”
“Nobody had to, Lilenta. This is my choice, not yours. Come on, Sylvan’s waiting.”
He led her down the steep steps and Liv let him, moving in a fog of uncertainty. They walked back through the Scourge Fathership, Baird striding confidently along as though he knew the way by heart. Well, he was a prisoner here for months and months, Liv reminded herself. And he did escape so maybe he knows the layout. She kept telling herself that Baird had to have some other plan. Surely once they reached the shuttle he would shoot anyone in their way and they would make a getaway and live happily ever after. Despite the guards that now flanked them on all sides and the strange looking weapon the AllFather’s son had trained on them, he wouldn’t really just give himself up, would he?
Brides of the Kindred Volume One: Books 1-4 Page 32