The Cowboy's Christmas Blessings

by Jill Kemerer

  “Hey there, cutie.” He gently shook Amelia’s toes covered in fuzzy pink socks. She stuck her little tongue out, then grinned. Glancing over his shoulder, he called to Nicole. “She smiled at me.”

  “Did she?” Looking flustered, Nicole held a ladle in one hand and a saltshaker in the other. “She must like you. She doesn’t smile for just anyone.”

  He chuckled, turning to Henry. Henry had darker hair than Eli, so Judd found it easy to tell them apart. “How are you, big man? I think you gained a pound overnight.” The baby blinked at him. Judd turned his attention to Eli on the end. “And, Eli, does your hand taste good?” The child was trying to eat the outside of his fist.

  Judd pressed his hands against his knees to stand up.

  “We’re all set.” Nicole brushed her hair behind her ear and took a seat at the table. The bags under her eyes worried him. Was she getting sick? Or was she overtired? He sat opposite her.

  She folded her hands and lifted her eyebrows for him to say grace. He obliged, and soon they were both blowing on spoons full of piping hot chili. Delicious, as all her meals were.

  “You’re doing too much.” He discreetly glanced her way.

  “Nope.” She shook her head. “I haven’t felt this good in a long, long time. I found most of my baking supplies today.”

  The gingerbread house. Guilt trickled into his veins like the drip from an IV. “I don’t want you wearing yourself out on my account.”

  “Wearing myself out? Hardly. Lois Dern spent all morning helping me with the babies. She had a lot to say about Misty Sandpiper flirting with some local cowboys. And Gretchen came yesterday. They’re amazing.”

  “But that’s only the mornings. Until now you’ve had help round the clock.” He took another bite of the chili and held back a groan. The woman could cook. If it wasn’t so hot, he’d have gobbled the contents of his bowl.

  “What are you talking about?” She gave him a strange look.

  “When you lived with your mom and sister.”

  “Oh...” She tapped her mouth with a napkin. “I wouldn’t call it help, exactly. They both worked and were busy. I’m not complaining—Mom usually made supper and didn’t want rent or anything. And they never minded watching the babies while I made a diaper run.”

  He frowned, reading between the lines. “You were taking care of the babies by yourself.”

  “For the most part. I have to admit, I was nervous about moving here on my own, but it’s been better than I’d hoped for. I hadn’t realized seeing all my baking things would get me so excited. I’ve missed it. I can’t wait to get started on your aunt’s house.”

  Put like that, he could hardly lecture her. He felt the same about ranching. Feeding the cattle, laughing at their antics, riding out all over his property made him feel alive.

  “When we’re done eating, take a look at the pictures and tell me if you think making the house is still feasible,” he said.

  “It will be.” She took another bite. “What did you do today? What exactly is involved with ranching in December, anyhow?”

  Flattered she’d asked, he almost launched into a full description of his winter ranch tasks, but he didn’t want to bore her. “The most important thing is to feed the herd. We spread hay for them twice a day, and we measure it to see how much they’re eating.”

  “What do you mean you measure it? Like weighing it?”

  “Yes, and we measure the length of the feed line after we unroll it in the pasture. It gives us a chance to see how much the cows are wasting.”

  “Do they waste much?”

  “Sometimes. With the ground frozen, less hay gets trampled into the dirt, though, so this weather helps. I don’t like wasting hay.”

  “I know the feeling. I’m constantly checking the triplets’ bottles to see how much they’re eating. Amelia is my light eater, and I hate dumping formula down the drain.” She took another bite.

  “Does she worry you?”

  “She did, but the doctor told me it’s normal. She’s just little.” Nicole took a drink of water. “What else do you do out there? Do you ride horseback in this weather?”

  “Not for feeding. I have a tractor that unrolls the hay bales for me. After that, yes, I saddle up and ride out as long as it’s not icy. Got to protect my horses.”

  “Do you have calves right now?”

  “No, we sold them last month. The cows are pregnant. We’ll be calving late February through early April.”

  They continued talking about the triplets’ schedule and his ranch work until Amelia whimpered. The boys were growing restless, too. Nicole had half a bowl of chili left, and he’d already finished seconds. He wanted her to be able to eat, but he didn’t know what the babies needed.

  She gave the boys their pacifiers, but Amelia didn’t want hers and let out a cry.

  Judd took his bowl into the kitchen and put it in the sink. “I’ll hold her while you finish eating.”

  “You don’t mind?”

  “Why would I mind?” He took her out of the carrier, enjoying the weight of her small body in his arms. She sure was cute. He made faces at her until she smiled, and he sat back down across from Nicole. When she finished her chili, she reached behind her and grabbed the envelope, then shuffled through the pictures.

  “Oh, these are perfect. The side views help. I’ll be able to draw up the wall plans and create a paper model to make sure it all fits together.”

  “How do you do that?”

  “I’ll sketch the walls to scale, cut them out and tape them together. It will help give us a visual when we’re assembling the real thing.”

  It sounded like a lot of work to him, but she seemed to think it would be fun. All he knew was Aunt Gretchen was going to love it.

  “I appreciate you going to all this trouble to help me.” He took in her shimmering eyes and sucked in a breath. His entire body warmed, and it wasn’t from the chili.

  Nicole was beautiful. Uncomplicated. Special.

  “Are you in a hurry to leave?” She began clearing the table. “If not, I can sketch out a few of the walls so you can get an idea of what we’ll be making.”

  He should leave. Shouldn’t stay. This attraction was wrong on every level. “Go ahead.”

  “I was hoping you’d say that.”

  “Why don’t I clear the table and do the dishes?” He stood and handed Nicole the baby. He’d stay a short while and then go home. “Then you can sketch all you want.”

  “You’d do that? Thanks.” The gratitude in her voice sent a fresh wave of shame to his gut. If she knew he wasn’t offering out of the kindness of his heart, she’d be mortified. She thought of him as a friend. He’d have to do his best to hide his attraction.

  Quickly, he cleared the table and loaded the dishwasher, tossed in a cleaning tab and wiped down the countertop. When he returned to the dining table, Nicole had Amelia tucked in one arm, and she was attempting to draw with her other hand.

  “That will never work. Let me.” He reached for the baby.

  “I have to admit it is a lot easier to draw when I can actually hold the ruler and the paper.”

  He entertained Amelia for the next ten minutes until the boys got cranky.

  “I need to change their diapers.” She put the pencil down and stretched her neck from side to side.

  “I’ll help.” Why had those words come out of his mouth? He didn’t know the first thing about diapering. What if he did it wrong? What if something gross was in there? Like you don’t deal with manure every day on the ranch, you big wimp.

  She picked up each boy and carried them to the bedroom. He followed with Amelia. Nicole showed him where the diapers and wipes were after setting one of the babies in a crib while she changed the other.

  “Do you want to try it?” she asked.

  He didn’t. And it wasn�
��t because he was grossed out or anything. For some reason, he felt shy about the whole thing. It felt intimate. Too intimate.

  “Just put her on the table...”

  He placed Amelia on the changing table the way Nicole demonstrated. Getting the stretchy pants off almost gave him heartburn. What if he scratched her? Her legs were so tiny. But the baby simply grabbed her little feet and gurgled. The diaper was next. He tried not to look, just grabbed a wad of wipes and started dabbing.

  “You only need one wipe, not half the container.” Nicole pressed her lips together to keep from laughing.

  “Sorry.” Heat rushed up his neck. He kept Amelia from wiggling away as he tried to unfold a new diaper. How in the world did this woman do it with three babies? He couldn’t even get one diapered, and he felt as if he’d been trying for two hours. Finally, he got the diaper under Amelia’s bottom, and when Nicole told him to press the sticker tabs, he obeyed.

  There. He’d changed a diaper.

  He lifted Amelia and the diaper slid right off.

  The baby made happy chirpy noises. At least one of them was enjoying this.

  “Fasten the tabs a little tighter.” Nicole had both boys in her arms again.

  “Maybe you’d better do it.”

  “You’ve got this.”

  He sighed and, sticking his tongue out to the side, refastened the diaper. This time it stayed.

  Beads of sweat had broken out on his forehead, and after he got Amelia’s stretchy pants back on, he picked her up and discreetly wiped his forehead with the back of his hand.

  “Good job. You’re a pro now.” Nicole’s green eyes danced.

  “I don’t know about that,” he said. “I’d better get out of your hair.”

  “Would you mind waiting a minute?” She led the way down the hall. “I have a list of ingredients I need, and I’m wondering if I should order everything or pick them up in town.”

  “Give me the list, and I’ll buy it all.” Back in the dining room, he set Amelia in her seat as Nicole got the boys settled.

  “Most of it is standard stuff you’ll find at the grocery store, but I don’t have a base.”

  “A base?”

  “Yes, a hard surface to build the gingerbread house on. That way we can move it easily.”

  He scratched his chin, trying to picture it. “What do you usually use?”

  “We’ve used sturdy cardboard boxes or even nice wooden bases.” She gestured to the living room. “I have plenty of boxes, but they’re all too big. I need something less than an inch in height.”

  “I’ll take care of it.” He knew exactly who to talk to. Stu Miller. The rancher made custom cutting boards in his spare time. “Anything else?”

  She disappeared into the kitchen for a moment and returned holding out a piece of paper. He scanned it, didn’t see anything out of the ordinary, folded the paper and put it in his pocket.

  “If I forgot anything, I’ll let you know.” She pushed up the sleeves of her sweater.

  “When do you want to get started?”

  “I should be able to have the walls sketched out tomorrow night. Do you have plans on Saturday?”

  “I do now. I have to get my ranch chores done in the morning, though.”

  “Then you can come out and play?” She grinned.

  He wanted to tease her back, to joke the way she did so effortlessly, but he simply nodded.

  After he put on his coat and boots, he paused in front of the door. “Thanks for the meal.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  When he was halfway down the lane to his house, he realized his problem. She made him feel young again, like it was the most natural thing in the world for them to hang out and for her to tease him.

  The cold air crept under his collar. Had he ever been young? Sometimes he thought he’d been born an old man.

  If he’d had a friend like Nicole growing up, he might not be so awkward now. As it was, he was mature enough to know at this stage of his life, he wouldn’t be content with only being friends. He just hoped she’d never catch on.

  Because he needed her friendship. More than she could possibly understand.

  Chapter Five

  Judd parked his truck in front of Stu Miller’s stables and stepped onto the gravel drive Thursday afternoon. His breath blew in visible spirals, but he didn’t feel cold. His sweatshirt, Carhartt jacket and jeans kept him plenty warm. Up ahead Dylan Kingsley pushed a wheelbarrow full of straw to the corral where Judd assumed they were keeping their steers. Dylan waved to him, calling, “Stu’s in the stables.”

  “Thanks.” He took a moment to gaze out over the spread. He’d always like Stu’s ranch. It was orderly and old-school. Nothing ostentatious, unlike his own huge house. Not that he was complaining; he loved his home, even if it was too big for one person. Black cattle in the distance broke up the white snow on the ground, and the blue sky didn’t have a cloud in it.

  “What can I do you for?” Stu strode out of the stables. He was wearing a thick plaid red-and-black jacket, jeans and cowboy boots. His gray hair matched his mustache. He was a tall man with a slight paunch. A toothpick bobbed between his teeth. Like Judd, he was a single rancher without any children. Unlike Judd, Stu was in his early seventies.

  “You still doing woodwork on the side?” Judd joined him at the fence where a few horses seemed to be enjoying the brisk air.

  “I am.” Stu propped a boot on the lower rail of the fence and stared out at the horses.

  “I’m working on a surprise for Aunt Gretchen. It’s a Christmas gift.”

  “Gretchen, huh?” Stu turned to him, his face lighting up.

  “Yeah, the plan is to bake her a gingerbread house styled after her childhood home.”

  Stu got a faraway look in his eye. “Is this the same one framed in her entryway?”

  “That’s the one.” What was Stu doing at his aunt’s house? Judd chided himself. The man had lived in this town forever, and Aunt Gretchen was known for her hospitality.

  “She’ll like that.” Stu nodded, turning to face the pasture once more. “What do you need me to do? I ain’t much of a baker.”

  Judd chuckled. “I’m not, either. Nicole Taylor—she’s staying in one of my empty cabins with the triplets—she worked at a bakery.” Saying the words made him uncomfortable. Would Stu read more into it?

  “I know Nicole. Remember seeing her in town as a young ’un with her ma and sister. They were a cute bunch. I remember when that fella of hers found out he had a disease in high school. She stuck with him, married him, too. Not many gals would do that, you know.”

  He did know, and it wasn’t helping him feel any better about the situation.

  “Doesn’t seem fair, does it?” Stu’s toothpick went up. “Having to raise three babies by herself. Makes me wonder.” He shook his head.

  What? What did it make him wonder?

  “And now her ma up and moved away with her boyfriend... Gretchen and Lois told me about it. I’m glad you gave Nicole a home. You’re a fine man, Judd.”

  His neck grew hot. He didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t the great guy Stu was making him out to be. It wasn’t as if he could make Stu understand, either. She’s cooking me dinner each night sounded weird.

  “I take it you’re looking for me to make something for this gingerbread house.”

  “Uh, yes.” Judd was grateful for the change in subject. “I need a wooden base. Less than an inch thick. Nothing too heavy. I have the dimensions here.” He pulled out a folded paper from his back pocket and handed it to Stu. “Think you could do it? We’d need it pretty quickly.”

  “Can I do it?” He acted like Judd had made a joke. “Of course I can do it. If it makes your aunt happy, I’m glad to help. I’ll have it to you tomorrow night.”

  “You don’t have to drop everything on
my account.”

  Stu laughed. “What do I have to drop? I’m an old man. It’ll give me something to do.”

  The way he said it made Judd frown. He had a lot in common with the rancher. No wife, no kids, just a large cattle ranch and a herd that depended on him. Was this what his future would look like? Unlike Stu, he didn’t even have a hobby.

  Judd thought about his estate planning and how he’d gotten nowhere with it.

  “Stu, do you mind if I ask for a bit of advice?”

  “Shoot.”

  “I’m making some long-term plans, and I’m kind of stuck.”

  “No heir.” He nodded, leaning against the top fence rail. “I’ve been there.”

  If he’d been there, that must mean he wasn’t there any longer. It gave Judd hope. “What did you do?”

  “I didn’t think about it much when I was a young buck, but I guess I was about your age when it started bothering me.”

  Good, maybe what he was going through was normal.

  “It was about that time I started relying on Josiah more and more. I knew he respected the ranch the way I did, so I named him in my will. After he died last year, I had to rethink things. Then Dylan came along, and...problem solved.” Stu’s toothpick bobbed up and down.

  Disappointment dripped down to his boots. He’d been hoping Stu would have the perfect solution for him.

  “Who’s your right-hand man, Judd?”

  “I couldn’t say for sure.” He liked both of his ranch hands, Dallas and Clay, but he didn’t exactly have a right-hand man. While he knew they liked working for him, he doubted they loved the ranch the way he did. It didn’t seem to be in their blood the way it was in his.

  Stu studied him, and Judd fought the urge to squirm.

  “You could take the normal route. Get married. Have kids.”

  Judd didn’t bother suppressing his grimace. He wasn’t exactly normal.

  “Don’t look so green, son. There’s a quality gal staying in a cabin down the lane from you. She’s got her hands full, sure, but she’d make a good wife.”

  “Her husband hasn’t been dead a year.” The words came out with more force than he intended.