I gathered some information about her during the car ride:
She's a washed up actress.
She used to make a substantial amount of money as an actress, and now is in her mid thirties, living off pay check to pay check.
What she primarily talked about, was the character in the book she was reading. The character was her idealized version. As we got to know each other, the characters in the books that were her favorite, had themes between them.
The characters were always a damsel in distress who synchronously, had an abundant lifestyle. Little parts of her wanted to play the victim, but she suppressed it, as soon as it she noticed it came out.
Furthermore, she spoke of a past lover who had always saved her from herself.
Her cracks were easy to fulfill. All I had to do was play the rescuer. First, I had to instill feelings of hopelessness in her. Then rescue her from her feelings of hopelessness.
What she was lacking in her life, was someone to rescue her.
The person revives/relieves a memory/ person you are missing.
Our minds are perpetually looking to revive memories that were pleasant. Whether it be past memories, past characteristics in your former friends, or past hobbies you participated in. Our minds always seem to be in a state of nostalgia.
How to take advantage of this:
First, you must ascertain what someone's state of mind is. If their minds are in the present, past, or future. Listen to what they're always bringing up. Here's how to tell what state of mind they are in:
Present: they're endlessly talking about what's going on right now, in the moment.
Past: They bring up past memories. "remember this." "I remember when." "There was a time when..."
Future: "I can't wait to do this." Future plans, among other examples.
Story:
In my late teens, I was a model. The perks of being a model were invitations to numberless VIP events and parties, including fashion shows, magazine launches, movie festivals, etc. I had met an "important" photographer at a fashion show. All the ladies were all over him, and it just made me want to conquer him. It was revealed, he wasn't all that dignitary. He reminisced in all the crazy, fun, adventurous things he did when he was my age. How much he was longing to revive those memories once again. He also mentioned that no one wanted to participate, because the activities were too risky.
What I did:
I did the things he wished someone would, when he was my age. Speeding in the middle of nowhere, climbing cell towers. Here's the plot twist: I was looking for someone to do these things with me too.
The person brings out your most deep suppressed sides.
How to take advantage of this:
You find out what their suppressed sides are by what movies they watch, what they laugh at, what Freudian slips may confess themselves. These are ways our suppressed sides, reveal themselves. Then, provoke the suppressed sides, either by having the characteristics of their suppressed sides, or luring them into situations that will awaken their suppressed selves.
A story:
I had met an attractive man named Robert, during a peaceful walk down the waterfront. He had caught my attention, because of his prominent Irish accent. Irish and Scottish accents turned me on. I immediately pointed out how much I admired his accent, and we got to talking. As we began to know each other, I saw a pattern in what he liked to converse about.
"So, are you going home now to do your little girly things?" I had no clue what girly things were, considering I was a girl. He had an bizarre obsession with my nails as well. He frequently criticized the men in the city, for being "too emotional." and, "kinda gay, and feminine."
This gave me insight into his inner self and world. His constant criticism of the male's femininity in our city, showed his resistance to his own femininity. Patiently, and slowly, I enabled his femininity to peak through the cracks.
One day, I had asked him if he could drive me to the spa. As I had foreseen, he asked me if "I was going to do any girly manicure business things." I told him yes, and innocently asked him if he would join me. His eyes sparkled, and he drifted off. It was almost as if his imaginations wandered off into the luxurious feminine things we would be indulging in.
He tried to play it cool, but agreed. If, I kept our feminine indulges a big fat dirty secret.
Takeaways:
All I had to do was lure him into a "feminine" circumstance, and tempt him.
Chapter 2
Target psychology
This chapter will be about the diverse categories and types of people you can get to obsess over you. Everyone fits into a category. Because no one person has the same psychology.
You need to understand, analyze and observe the people you are going to make obsessed with you.
Targets are categorized by what is missing in their lives. Their motivations, their idealized selves, and what past memories they want to revive.
Once you've gotten a grasp on what category they fall into, there will be steps you must follow. I will provide tips that will appeal to your target. Everyone falls in love nonconformably, which is why it is important you appeal to his or her "category" psychology.
Remember everyone could fall into more than one target category. So it's all about the right timing.
In this chapter, I provide you with:
-A description of the victim type.
-Signs your target fits into this category.
-Possible psychological causes.
-Note: These are just general descriptions. Since we are all different, two different people could be the identical in behavior, but for two different reasons. You must find the accurate reasons.
-How you get them to fall in love with you. And, their matching archetype.
-Things you need to avoid if you want them to fall for you.
-What is missing in their lives.
-Their motivations.
-Idealized selves.
-Suppressed desires and dark sides.
(Also see: ideal lover) At the end, I will provide personality profiles from people that I have met, and people that I successfully seduced. Or, people that I have advised, or other people’s relationships.
how to pick and choose your targets
You can't have everyone under your spell. You must elect a specific type of person.
Here are some key points on who would be ideal and why.
1) Natural attraction.
If your target repulses you, eventually you become resentful and will not be able to perform to your maximum potential. Choose a target that induces sexual or romantic tension, and things will flow beautifully between the two of you.
2) They have something you need. Whether it is an opportunity, money, a job, and a relationship. This is a win win because you're fulfilling their psychological needs, deepest, suppressed, and ideal fantasies. They fulfill whatever you wanted from them. Both of you win.
Obsession happens because a person has needs that aren’t met, usually psychologically. And, you unconsciously meet this need. Their subconscious mind interprets it as love, but it is all psychology.
Who wouldn't be ideal and why:
1) If they're genuinely a good person. (Not the pushover type, or innocent type.) This is common sense. Don't corrupt someone's psyche if they're a good person. It's as simple as that. Noble people deserve hugs, not excruciating mental pain.
2) If you know you'll get too attached.
In the end, you may end up feeling guilty as hell. You'll think to yourself, great. This person actually thinks it was real. (Love.) But, I just invented it. Even if you admit to them, they'll be in denial. And/or possibly think you are just trying to push them away. Because you may be that good at it. Or, they will find reasons to believe you are being dishonest. Admittedly, you will fall into your own trap.
3) If you're doing it for the emotional thrills.
This is what I used to do. I advise against it. Because it can and will backfire on you.
In the short term, you will find yourself with an inflated ego. Then someone will turn the game around on you, and make you feel like absolute garbage. Suddenly, you will find yourself with a reputation. The heartbreaker. The slut. Player. The con artist. The cold hearted son of a bitch. Worst one, the liar. Either way. Society puts us in corners and places us in boxes with these labels we are supposed to identify with. If you are going to build a reputation, build a credible, reputable one. Because trust me, things people know about you or your reputation can follow you around. Unconsciously people will believe these things about you, as well. As you grow older until you retire or do business, your reputation matters. Even getting into potential relationships, your reputation matters.
You will break hearts and people's trust. People will hate you for that. You'll also end up looking incredibly insecure and pathetic. Word gets around rapidly. I don't live in a small town either. But it is a small world. So better yet, keep things to yourself. Do not make any decisions based on your ego.
4) If you know you'll end up hating them, and are repulsed. Or, if you already hate them. There is only so much you can do before your act falls apart, and they'll feel you were one big stupid act. Your hatred will keep you from maintaining your hard work.
5) If they have nothing to offer you. There's nothing lower than a scumbag who preys on people who have nothing to offer you, material and monetary wise.
For example: my mother and grandma were at the mall. A lady and my grandmother start chatting. This lady was selling a vitamin drink, and told my grandma that if she wanted to get rich, my grandma should sell this product. Note that my grandma is naive. Best selling products and books are the ones that make things that seem complex. appear effortless.
The sad thing is, we can all get rich. If we did something about it. But, do not prey on people who cannot offer you, what you desire. If you want to make money selling that product, than sell to the rich. Duh?
what is the perfect lover?
When you're on a date and someone asks you "so what are you looking for in a man/woman?" Or the alternative: "What are you looking for in a relationship?"
Often times we hear these familiar answers: we need to get along. Treat me well, etc. While these are valuable, these are answers coming from the conscious mind. What you'll want to know is what their subconscious mind desires. This is where the perfect lover criteria fit in. We all have different ideals that a partner and relationship consist of.
The problem with many popular articles about being the "perfect" girlfriend, or boyfriend, is that the person writing the articles, believes that one size fits all. This is false. These articles do not apply to everyone. You must find out what someone's ideal lover is, then play to their preferences.
Our perfect lover criteria consists of:
**Note: The ideal lover criteria are also the causes of obsession. (See: Chapter 2)
What they're lacking. (A.k.a The void.)
A person, who is lacking something in their lives, feels they have a void. This void consists of specific internal lacks. People are unaware of what their internal lacks are; hence they search for external resources to fulfill the lacks they are unaware of.
Internal lacks develop when we are children. The internal lacks we have developed, are the lacks we had in our childhood, or past experiences.
Their insecurities.
When we were children, we believed we were perfect. Then, someone close to us told us otherwise. Our noses were too bulbous, we had potbellies. Insecurities develop because do we do not feel secure in a specific area of our lives. Most people will deny their insecurities, and find something to make them feel better about their insecurities, or compensate in another area of their lives.
The people that make us feel good about our insecurities are a part of our ideals.
Their idealized selves.
In our perfect world, we are someone else. This is called our idealized self. However, in the real world, we cannot be our idealized selves. There are many possibilities as to why this may happen:
1) You don't have the right circumstances.
2) You don't believe you can.
3) It’s "wrong."
4) You currently don't have the resources to transform into your idealized self.
Our suppressed sides.
Our suppressed sides are sides of ourselves that we suppress, or our subconscious mind represses. Due to the same reasons as the "idealized self." One, who can bring out our suppressed sides, is the one we can escape to.
Things, people and memories we wish to revive again.
Our minds are always searching to revive past pleasant memories.
Someone who reflects ourselves onto us.
We tend to like people who are similar to us. Someone who agrees on tastes, values, and similar preferences. After all, you'll need to agree on something.
When we meet someone, our subconscious mind is always searching for people that may fit one or more of these criteria. When we become obsessed with someone, they have either fulfilled one or all of the above. This is usually not the case though. Most of the time, we find different outlets to fulfill our ideal lover criteria.
For example: A shy person may turn to an outgoing person to fulfill his idealized self. Yet, he may go to video games to revive his childhood. He watches bondage porn because it releases his aggressive side. He follows a former body builder online, because he is insecure about his anorexic body image, and lacks adventure in his life, so he spends all night watching action movies.
Now, a person could go to other people rather than items or events. Here is an example:
Jenna can't choose between the five men she's seeing.
John soothes her insecurities about her income by assisting her financially.
Yet, she goes back to Tom because he revives past memories of her teenage years. He revives her teenage years because he was once her high school teacher. Jake brings out her naughty sexual side she has to suppress, and Jake's brother whom she is secretly obsessed with is her idealized self. He's completely free and liberated; he does what he wants, when he wants. He has no psychological restrictions. Yet, Tom fulfills her internal lack of peace, by practicing meditation.
Jenna's needs are spread out to different people.
Timing:
Timing plays an important role, because during different periods of our lives, different needs become prioritized, you must watch for this. (For more details see: timing)
Why people never stay in the honeymoon phase:
The honeymoon phase is over when the other person starts to notice cracks in your personality, such as dark secrets revealed, disgusting habits, past activities that put you in a different light. You can avoid this by continually playing their ideal lover, and having the correct timing. Once they see these potential pet peeves, they stop projecting, and become repulsed.
Ideal lovers are all about projection:
This is merely about projection. The other person gives the person ammunition to project. They show hints of qualities that could potentially be characteristics of the ideal lover. The person projecting doesn't know enough about the other person; therefore their mind fills in the gaps, by projecting images of what we want to see in the other person.
masculine and feminine psychology
"Women are so complicated."
"God, men are so puzzling."
Note: these are generalized. Not every female will think this way, and not every male will think this way. These are simply masculine and feminine mindsets. This is why I say "masculine vs. feminine brain." Any gender could adapt both.
Sound familiar? Maybe you or someone you know, believe the opposite gender's existence is intricate. Why though?
You don't comprehend the masculine/feminine brain. This is why you believe the opposite genders are complex.
Females expect men to think and behave like them. Men believe women will think and operate like them. Then they realize they don't. It's treating a cat li
ke a dog. It just doesn't work. You would treat and communicate with cats how they should be treated. When applied, the there will be a great deal of satisfaction on both sides.
Communication.
Women tend to talk more, and want to share their emotions. Men talk less, but will want to solve the problem.
Men are more visual. Women care more about personality.
Men are like hunters, and women are the receivers. Which means men like to provide, and give. The women will receive, because they're receptive.
Men laugh when they think something is funny. Women laugh when they think it’s appropriate.
Women are more empathetic. Men are more logical.
How To Make Someone Fall In Love With You, Forever; How to Make Someone Obsessed With You Page 2