Ain't No Sunshine

by Leslie DuBois

  I’m still amazed they believed me. I slipped up a couple of times. I told the lieutenant I didn't drink coffee, but then I told him I drank coffee the morning Ruthie went to New York. It was an elaborate lie and some things were hard to keep straight. But overall, I did pretty well. I'm a very convincing person, which is why Ruthie and I decided I should do the talking. No one would believe her. Not because she's black but because she's too sweet. She feels too much. It's part of the reason why I love her so. She makes me feel as well. She melted away the numbing emptiness that my life had become.

  It's all over now. The truth didn't set us free. My lies did.

  Once a year, Ruthie and I carefully plan a trip to visit my mother. Sometimes she recognizes us and sometimes she doesn't. Sometimes she won't even talk to us because she thinks we're Theodore and Mabel.

  Ruthie and I have a relatively normal life living in Canada, just across Michigan's border. She's sold several paintings under her assumed name, Saffron James. I work in a bottling factory during the day and take college classes at night.

  We’re careful. We don't talk about Virginia. We don't call each other by our real names, even when we're alone. I think we both secretly pretend that Matthew Clare really is my father. It helps us both sleep better at night. With each passing day, the guilt subsides a little more.

  No one suspects. No one will ever know. Because she's black and I'm white, no one looks close enough to realize we have the same shaped chin and ears. To everyone else, we're just a young couple in love.

  Reading Group Guide

  1. Why did Stephen choose to begin his story when he was five-years-old in 1963? Would the story have been as effective if set in modern times? What would have needed to change? How would modern day technology affect Stephen’s story?

  2. What part did race play in the development of Stephen and Ruthie’s love? Would they have felt as strongly about each other if they were the same race? Would they have suspected their true relationship if they were the same race? How would things have been different if Stephen and Ruthie learned the truth earlier?

  3. Why was Matthew a necessary character in Stephen’s story? How did Matthew’s character help garner sympathy for Stephen and Ruthie in the eyes of the Lieutenant? Did anything about Matthew’s character at the beginning of the book seem unlikely?

  4. We briefly meet a racist officer named Tom, did Tom’s prejudice help Stephen’s credibility from the point of view of Lt. Drake?

  5. How did the mental states of Marjorie and Grandma Esther play a role in Stephen’s story? Would his tale have been as effective if they were both mentally competent? Why or why not?

  6. How did segregation and racism affect Theodore’s life and decisions? Was Theodore free to make his own choices about whom to love? Did he really love Ruthie and her mother? Why didn’t he confess sooner?

  7. Why was Julius important to the plot? Would things have been different without him, or would Stephen eventually have come to the same conclusion to “concentrate on the half that ain’t?”

  8. Why did Stephen and Marjorie stay in an abusive home for so long? Can what Stephen and Ruthie did be called “Self-defense?” Why or why not? If it is self-defense, why not just tell Lt. Drake the truth? Would Lt. Drake have been as sympathetic?

  9. What inconsistencies did you find in Stephen’s story, or were you completely fooled? If so, why? What questions are you left with after Stephen’s revelation about Matthew? Was Stephen really abused by his father? Or are he and Ruthie just psychopaths?

  10. In your opinion, who really is the “abomination?” Theodore or Stephen?

  A Sneak Peek into Guardian of Eden by Leslie DuBois

  Prologue:

  Man vs. Evil

  “Somebody help, please!”

  A man in blue scrubs rushed toward me, took my sister’s limp body from my arms and placed her on a gurney. He flashed a light in her eyes and took her pulse as a woman fired questions at me.

  “Are you her boyfriend?”

  “Boyfriend? She’s 12!”

  “How long has she been unconscious?”

  “She passed out in the car. About 10 minutes. She said her stomach hurts.” My voice, usually deeper than most teenage boys’, sounded shrill, and broken, almost child-like as it resonated against the cold sterile walls of the near-empty emergency room.

  “Is she on drugs?”

  “Drugs? She’s only 12!” The man and woman wheeled my sister into a room. I tried to follow, but another woman pulled me aside and started examining me, probing me with both her questions and her hands. “What are you doing?” I asked when she lifted up my shirt.

  “Where were you stabbed?”

  “Stabbed?”

  “Yes, I’m trying to find the source of the blood.”

  “Blood?” I looked down and gasped at the bright-red stain soaking my shirt and my pants from mid chest all the way to my knees. Trapped in the urgency of the moment, I hadn’t noticed the wetness of my clothing. Now that the adrenaline started to wear off, it came into focus. My shirt stuck to my skin where my sister’s blood started drying. “Oh my God,” I said, allowing my weight to shift towards the wall as I felt my knees weaken. I misjudged the distance and stumbled.

  “I think he’s going into shock,” she yelled, trying to steady me with her gloved hands. “We need another gurney!”

  “No, no, I’m fine. Just help Eden, please.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes, the blood’s not mine. It’s hers.”

  Her eyes bulged she stepped back and looked at the amount of blood on me. “Dr. Shepherd we need you in number one,” she shouted as she whirled away in a blur of white. “The girl’s hemorrhaging!” The nurse charged behind the curtain with an IV pole, a bag of fluid, and a fistful of test tubes. I heard her bark orders from behind the ugly blue fabric. “We need stat labs. I think she’s going to need refill.”

  Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Maddie enter the emergency room and run to me. “What did they say? What’s wrong with her?” she said. I shrugged and placed my head in my hands. Maddie sat down next to me and rubbed my back. “Don’t worry, Garrett. She’ll be fine.”

  I shook my head to fight back the tears. Too many had fallen in my lifetime. At seventeen, I was already tired of crying.

  “Garrett, she’s strong. She’s tougher than you give her credit for. Both of you have had to be to make it this far. You’ll make it through this too.”Maddie weaved her fingers in mine and lifted my hand to her lips. She tried to comfort me, but her words felt empty and meaningless in my despair. She didn’t understand. Yes, Eden and I had been through a lot of turmoil and survived. I knew how to shield her from all our previous trials. But how do I protect her from what I don’t know? She was already sick. Obviously, danger had seeped in and I wasn’t there to prevent it. I didn’t protect her.

  Maddie continued to hold my hand as she started chewing on her bottom lip and tapping her foot. Moments later she let go of my hand, jumped out of her seat then paced the floor while mindlessly snapping her fingers. After about thirty seconds, she sat back down, took my hand, and rested her head on my shoulder as if she might fall asleep. In an instant, she was up again and pacing. Suddenly, she stopped and stared at me.

  “We should get you out of those clothes. I’ll go see what’s in the car,” she said as she dashed out of the door to the parking lot. She needed to do something to occupy her time and keep her mind off of Eden.

  After she left, I walked up to the reception area and said, “Excuse me, but I brought in the little girl a few minutes ago. Can you tell me anything yet? Is she conscious?”

  The short brunette shook her head apologetically. “As soon as I find out something, I’ll let you know. You can help things along by filling this out, though.” She handed me a clipboard with some papers.

  As soon as I sat down, Maddie returned. She handed me a T-shirt. “This was all I could find.” She sat down next to me and resumed her nervous habits
.

  I spent the next fifteen minutes filling out forms. I didn’t think to bring Eden’s insurance card so I had to recall the information from memory. Usually, I have a perfect photographic memory, but when I’m stressed, it fails. It took several tries before I could see the numbers on her card in my head. I also wrote down everything I knew about Eden’s medical history. There wasn’t much. Of the two of us, she was always healthier. The only time she had ever been to a hospital was to visit me. When I finished, I went to the bathroom and cleaned up.

  ***

  “Who is responsible for this girl?” The doctor demanded as he stormed into the waiting room.

  “I am,” I said, standing up so quickly I woke Maddie who had fallen asleep on my shoulder.

  “And just who are you?”

  “I’m her brother.” The doctor raised his left eyebrow and looked me up and down. I knew exactly what he was thinking. “Look, we have the same mother, but my father is black, her father is white. Now can you tell me what’s wrong with her?”

  “Brother, huh? I think it’s time to get the police involved.” The doctor turned his back to me and stepped toward the nurse’s station.

  “Police? What the…?” I reached out and grabbed his shoulder.

  I just wanted him to explain, but the doctor reacted to the motion as a sign of aggression and yelled, “Security!”

  “Wait, wait, wait,” Maddie said, taking my hand and stepping between me and the doctor. “He didn’t mean anything. He just really needs to know what’s going on. My boyfriend is very protective of his little sister.”

  The doctor studied the two of us for a few seconds. He must have instantly trusted Maddie’s big blue eyes. Everyone did. Including me. She had an innocence, an honesty, in her sweet round face that melted away doubt and suspicion.

  "Let me see some identification from both of you." I took out my wallet and handed him my student I.D. while Maddie fumbled around in her purse. She couldn't find her wallet. She dumped the contents of her bag onto the floor and searched on hands and knees.

  "Damn it. I left my wallet," she mumbled as she turned red. Then she whipped off her necklace and stood. "This has my medical information," she told the doctor holding the necklace in front of him. "There's my name and my address and my father's name if you want to call him."

  "Bartholomew McPhee?" the doctor asked. "Senator Bartholomew McPhee is your father?" She nodded. He looked from Maddie to me then back. He knew he needed to proceed cautiously in dealing with the daughter of a Virginia senator, especially when that senator currently occupied all the news headlines. He cleared his throat then waved off the security guard. “Do you have any contact information for your mother?” he asked, trying not to seem uneasy about Maddie's parentage.

  "She's visiting her mother in North Carolina this weekend." I wrote my mother’s cell phone number on his clipboard.

  “Eden's in exam room 3,” he called over his shoulder as he stormed off to the nurse’s station and picked up the phone. Before dialing he added, “If you upset her in anyway, I’m banning you from her room.”

  Eden started crying and held her arms out to me when I entered her room.

  “What’s wrong with me, Gary? Am I dying? It hurts so bad.” I crawled into bed next to her and held her just like I did when she was little. Cramming ourselves into a small bed didn’t bother either one of us. We had slept in worse conditions.

  “Shhh. Don’t cry. You’re not dying. I would never let that happen. The doctors here are going to fix you up and you’re gonna be just fine.” I stroked her dark blonde hair and stared into her brown-green eyes.

  “You promise?”

  “I promise. I would never let anything bad happen to you.” Eden cried harder. She cried herself into exhaustion and fell asleep in my arms.

  ***

  “I brought you some coffee,” Maddie whispered as she entered the room. I hadn’t even noticed she left.

  “You don’t have to whisper. She’s sound asleep. Eden could sleep through a tornado.” I slid out of the hospital bed then took the cup of coffee she held out to me.

  “Is she okay?”

  I nodded as I took a sip. It tasted wretched. I put the lid back on and placed it on the table.

  Maddie hugged herself and stared down at my little sister. She was worried about her. Over the past few months, she’d grown quite attached to Eden. I stepped behind her, put my hands on her shoulders and kissed the top of her platinum blonde head.

  “You called me your boyfriend. You’ve never called me your boyfriend before.” Maddie turned around and stared up at me with her blue-lake eyes. Eyes so wide and blue and soft I wanted to drown in them. She stood up straight and wrapped her arms around my neck. She almost couldn’t reach even on her tiptoes. At sixteen years old, Maddie was two inches shorter than my twelve-year-old sister. But then again Eden was taller than most twelve-year-olds, a great asset in her modeling career.

  Maddie ran her fingers through my long black hair and as tears welled in her eyes she said, “I love you, Garrett.”

  “I love you, too,” I said before pressing my lips to hers. It should have the happiest moment in my life. Madison McPhee loved me. But I couldn’t fully enjoy it knowing my sister was suffering just feet away.

  “What about your father? What about the election?” I asked after kissing her breathless.

  “I don’t care what he says. I need you, I want you, and I can’t exist without you.” We both smiled as she repeated the exact same words I’d told her just two weeks ago.

  “Now you’re just picking on me,” I said.

  “Well, you have to admit, it’s a pretty corny line.”

  “It wasn’t a line. It’s the truth.” I kissed her again. Our kiss deepened as I pulled her closer to me. I don’t know what would have happened if we weren’t interrupted by a soft tapping on the door.

  “May we speak to you in the hall?” the doctor asked me after poking his head in. “I’m sorry I didn’t introduce myself properly,” he said once we left the room. “I’m Dr. Shepherd and this is Rowena Smith from Child Services.”

  I shook both their hands and said, “I don’t understand why Child Services is here?” while eyeing them suspiciously. I’d seen enough of Child Services for five lifetimes.

  “We spoke to your mother,” Dr. Shepherd said ignoring my question. “She faxed over a letter giving you power of attorney over Eden. She trusts you to make all the decisions concerning her welfare.” That letter was worthless in my book. I’d already been doing that for the past twelve years.

  “Will you tell me what’s wrong with my sister, please?” Dr. Shepherd and Rowena Smith exchanged a look, a look of foreboding that instantly made my heart race.

  “You might want to sit down, son,” the overweight black lady said as she put her hand on my shoulder.”

  “I don’t want to sit down. I want to know what’s wrong with her.”

  Dr. Shepherd sighed and said, “Your sister had a miscarriage.” I stared at him blankly as the words swirled around my mind. Everything logical in me told me it was impossible.

  “I’m sorry. You must be looking at the wrong chart. My sister is only twelve.”

  “It’s not a mistake, Garrett. We’ve already performed the D&C. The fetus was about 6 weeks old.” My knees gave out. I collapsed in a chair. My heart tightened in my chest. My stomach revolted. I thought I might vomit. The doctor kept talking, but I really couldn’t hear anything else.

  “Who did this? Who could do that to a child?” I asked, interrupting the doctor’s details.

  “We need your help to figure that out,” Rowena said. “Does she have a boyfriend? Is there any chance this was consensual?”

  I glared at her. How could she even suggest something like that?

  “A detective is on the way,” she said once she noticed my fierce expression. “Do you know anything that may help with the investigation?”

  I shook my head. I knew nothing. What kind of brot
her was I to let something like this happen? I should have been paying more attention to her. This was my fault and I was going to fix it.

  ***

  Eden began to stir around five o’clock in the morning. I asked Maddie to leave the room for a few minutes. Eden cried for me and I took her hand.

  “Eden, I know something bad happened to you,” I said as I tucked her hair behind her ear. “I know I let you down.”

  “Gary, don’t cry. It’s not your fault.” She reached up and wiped a tear from my face.