The Other Life

by Susanne Winnacker

  1,142 days since I’d stopped caring about such things. I wouldn’t start again now.

  I rinsed my mouth with water – I didn’t want to use someone else’s toothbrush – and made my way downstairs, following the voices coming from the kitchen.

  Joshua, Geoffrey, Karen and a middle-aged man with glasses and a bald head sat at the table.

  “Good morning, Sherry.” Karen smiled warmly. “This is my husband Larry.” She nodded towards the middle-aged man. He gave a small nod. He seemed cautious – not surprising. He didn’t know much about me. I guess this new world required a certain amount of wariness.

  I shifted nervously on my feet and pulled my hands out of my pockets, not sure if I should join them or stay where I was. Joshua patted the chair next to him. With a grateful smile, I walked over. The smell of warm bread filled the room. Mouth-watering.

  I looked longingly at the basket of biscuits in the middle of the table. Karen laughed and pushed the basket over to me. “Larry baked them this morning. He and Marie are the cooks of our little patchwork family. Enjoy the biscuits. It was our last packet of flour.”

  I picked one of the warm biscuits and broke it in half. Steam rose up from its soft insides. I took a bite.

  “They’re good,” I said between mouthfuls of my second biscuit. The guarded look on Larry’s face morphed into an embarrassed smile.

  A guy entered the kitchen. He was tall and lanky. His black trousers hung loosely on his hips and his sleeveless shirt revealed tattooed arms and shoulders.

  I stopped chewing. With a short nod towards me, he took the chair beside Larry.

  “Morning, Tyler. Hungry?” Karen shoved the basket towards him. He picked a biscuit without a word. His head was shaved and his brown eyes were dull. He wasn’t much older than Joshua, maybe in his early twenties. Joshua cleared his throat. I tore my gaze from Tyler, my face growing hot. I’d gawked at him like he was an animal in a zoo. How embarrassing.

  “I didn’t see you come back last night. How long did you stay in the vineyard?” Joshua asked.

  Tyler put a pad on the table in front of him and started scribbling. He pushed the pad over to Joshua. I glanced at the words. It was neat handwriting, so I could read the letters easily.

  Midnight. Watched the stars.

  Joshua sighed. “You shouldn’t be outside alone at night.”

  Tyler leaned over and wrote another reply.

  Don’t worry. Can take care of myself.

  “I know you can.”

  A grin flitted across Tyler’s face as he leaned back and ate the rest of his biscuit.

  “Geoffrey suggested that he could drive to your family’s home,” Joshua said.

  It took a moment before I realized what he’d said. I glanced between him and Geoffrey, swallowed the last bite of biscuit and licked my lips. “I’m not sure if my mother would trust someone she doesn’t know. Dad told her to be careful. She probably wouldn’t even open the door of the bunker, or she’d try to shoot you before you got the chance to explain.”

  Geoffrey didn’t look as if the prospect of getting shot scared him – losing your wife and children likely did that to you.

  “Maybe Geoffrey can follow us in his car. Then you can tell your family what they need to know, Geoffrey can bring them here and we can start searching for your dad straight away,” Joshua said, picking a biscuit and munching on it.

  “Okay.” I nodded. Then my eyes found the cuckoo clock. It was almost six.

  15 hours and about 37 minutes since the Weepers had captured Dad.

  About 56,220 seconds.

  56,222 seconds.

  Too long.

  Joshua’s eyes searched my face. “You look pale.”

  “I’m fine.” A feeble attempt at lying. I couldn’t have sounded more distressed if I’d tried, but Joshua didn’t ask further questions. He left the kitchen and returned with a huge backpack.

  “We should set out now.”

  Electricity shot through me. I didn’t need to be told twice. I turned to Karen. “Can you give me something for my foot? Some painkillers?”

  She nodded. “Of course. Wait a sec.” She walked towards a cupboard, opened the top drawer, and started rummaging. A minute later, she held two small white pills out to me. “They’ll help,” she promised.

  I swallowed them with a sip of water. Their bitter taste spread on my tongue. Hopefully they’d take effect soon.

  “You sure you want to do this?” Joshua asked.

  “Of course. I’ve got to find my father.”

  Joshua studied my face for a moment, and seemed satisfied with what he saw. “Okay then.” He headed for the corridor, backpack in hand.

  Karen wrapped her arms around me in a tight hug. “Good luck.” She let go and stepped back with a strained smile. Then she put a few biscuits and apples into a bag, before handing it to me. “Provisions, in case your search takes longer than expected.”

  With a last grateful look, I walked out of the kitchen. Larry followed me outside, while Karen hung back to discuss something with Geoffrey.

  Larry limped badly. His right leg looked stiff. Probably thanks to the Weepers. A shiver ran down my back when I thought about it. He put a hand on my shoulder.

  “Joshua has fought those beasts before. He’ll make sure you all come back in one piece.”

  I gave him a faint smile, hoping he was right. Geoffrey walked past us towards an old Ford that was parked behind the Lincoln. Joshua had already gotten into his car, so, with a deep breath, I went and took my seat beside him.

  When I reached for the seat belt, Joshua stopped my hand.

  “Don’t. You might need to leave the car fast. The belt will only slow you down.” He turned the key in the ignition, starting the engine. I hoped I wouldn’t have to find out how fast I could leave the car.

  As we pulled out of the courtyard, Larry and Karen waved us goodbye. Their faces were solemn and pale. It was an expression I’d seen on Grandma’s face moments before Grandpa’s last breath. Maybe they thought we wouldn’t be coming back. I didn’t allow myself to consider that possibility.

  My hands were sweaty and it was difficult to sit still. Joshua glanced at me a few times. I tried not to fidget, but it was hopeless. Eventually I slumped against the seat and sighed.

  “You must stay calm. It’s important that you’re able to think straight.”

  I pursed my lips. “It’s not that easy. What if we’re too late? What if he’s already…dead?” It took me a moment to get the word out. A burning started behind my eyeballs, but I blinked it away. Mental strength is what sets survivors apart from victims – that’s what Grandpa and Dad used to say.

  Joshua looked at me for a second before he returned his attention to the street. “We’ll get to him in time.” His tone lacked conviction – or maybe I just imagined that.

  “Where did you learn to drive? Who taught you?” It was a feeble attempt at trying to distract myself.

  “Nobody. I taught myself. I guess my incentive to learn was pretty strong. It was either that, or fall prey to the Weepers because I wasn’t fast enough.”

  He was talking about it so casually. It was hard to believe that I could ever handle such horror like he did. Maybe I’d think differently in a few months – if I was still alive. Bad thought.

  “I can teach you, if you want,” Joshua said.

  “Teach me?”

  “Driving. I can teach you how to drive.” He patted the steering wheel.

  “That would be great.” If we ever got back to Safe-haven. If we survived.

  We were silent for the rest of the ride. I gnawed at the patches of chapped skin on my lips, and when we finally reached my neighbourhood, I tasted blood. I peeked out of the windows, trying to spot if anything had changed since yesterday. It hadn’t. The street was just as deserted and spooky as before. I let my eyes wander over the grey sky.

  A black dot in the distance made me stop. I tried to make out what it was. A bird? It seemed too big and
too fast for even an eagle. What was it? But within a few seconds, it had disappeared. And at that moment we passed number forty-five – where Dad and I had seen the bodies of our neighbours.

  They were still there. If you didn’t look too closely, they appeared to be asleep. A raven dived towards them and landed on the man’s chest. It started pecking his face. I swallowed down bile and turned away.

  “There.” I pointed at my house. Joshua slowed down and stopped the car in the middle of the street.

  “Don’t you want to park at the kerb?” I asked.

  Joshua lifted a single eyebrow. “Why? Are you expecting someone to drive along this street anytime soon?”

  He had a point.

  Geoffrey pulled up behind us and got out of his car, scanning the neighbourhood, his shoulders tense. “There are two bodies.” He nodded in the direction of my neighbour’s house at the end of the street.

  Joshua gave a small nod before he looked at me. “Do you know what happened to them?”

  I shook my head. “Dad and I found them yesterday.”

  “I’ll take a look,” Geoffrey said. “You go talk to your family.”

  “Take a gun with you.” Joshua threw the shotgun to Geoffrey, who caught it cleanly.

  Geoffrey frowned. “One day you’ll kill someone with your recklessness.”

  “The gun’s locked. Don’t wet yourself,” Joshua retorted. Then he turned and passed one of the smaller guns to me. “Ready?”

  We approached my home. Dad had shut the door the day before, and I didn’t have a key.

  “Step aside,” Joshua demanded, aiming a revolver at the door. He shot twice. What the hell? I covered my ears – too late.

  Joshua took a few steps back and threw himself against the door. It swung open, hitting the wall behind it with a loud bang. I walked forward but Joshua held me back. I raised my eyebrows at him.

  “Let me go ahead,” he said.

  Gun in hand, he had already moved into the house. I followed directly behind him, my own gun lowered but firmly in my grasp. Joshua glanced over his shoulder at me, before walking determinedly towards the steel door of the bunker.

  “Do you have a key?”

  “No.” Sudden panic made my voice sound high and weird. I had to get my family out of there, make sure they were safe.

  I hammered against the door. The skin on my knuckles burned and it hurt like hell. Joshua stopped me, his touch gentle on my arm. “If it’s soundproof, they won’t hear you.”

  Fear shot through me. What if they weren’t in the bunker?

  “Do you have a spare key somewhere?” he asked.

  The cookie jar! I rushed into the kitchen, my shoulder colliding painfully with the door frame. I climbed onto the counter and grabbed the jar from the highest shelf. Our set of spare keys was still in it.

  Joshua leaned on the door frame. With his guns and hunting knife stuck in the waistband of his black jeans, he looked like the hunter that he was. “Have you found it?”

  “I think so – we need to try these,” I said, determined not to look at him.

  After I’d tried the fourth key – which didn’t fit – the door was opened from inside. Mom’s worried face appeared in the gap and her eyes widened when she saw me. Before I knew what had happened, she’d wrapped her arms around me in a tight hug.

  She smiled, but her face fell when she pulled back and caught sight of Joshua behind me. She took a step back, glancing between me and him warily. Worry flickered in her eyes. “Where’s your father? And who’s that boy?” she asked. Her voice had a hysterical edge.

  “That’s Joshua. And Dad…” My self-control crumbled and tears began to flow down my cheeks. Everything bubbled out of my mouth and my mother listened in horror.

  Bobby came running up the stairs, but stopped abruptly when he saw my face. Mia tried to peek past him and her eyes widened when she caught sight of me. She’d never seen me cry before.

  Mom clutched the banister. Her face was like ash and her breath caught in her throat. Desperate to calm her, I squeezed her hands. Another asthma attack could be too much. It had been getting steadily worse for months – she needed her medication.

  Joshua glanced over my shoulder into the bunker, seeing my gasping mother, my scared brother and sister. His knuckles turned white from his grip on the revolver, his lips thinning out. “Don’t worry. Sherry and I will find him,” he said to my mother. He sounded more convincing than he had in the car.

  Thank God.

  Mom looked up at him and her breathing calmed. She gave a nod. Then she hugged him. “Thank you for saving her. Thank you so much,” she spluttered.

  Joshua winced and patted her back, before untangling himself from her grasp. I turned to Bobby. His lips were pressed together so hard they looked white. Our eyes met.

  My fault that Dad had been taken by Weepers.

  My fault that he might never come back.

  All my fault.

  It was there in his eyes.

  I’d abandoned Dad. Even without the accusation in Bobby’s stare, I knew that.

  Mom ushered Bobby and Mia back down the stairs. I followed. Joshua stayed at the top of the steps, reluctant to set foot in the bunker. He clung to the banister, like a cat digging its claws into the ground to avoid a bath.

  Mia leaped at me, her face lit up. I lifted her in my arms and pressed her against my chest as hard as possible without hurting her.

  “We need to get going,” Joshua said. He slowly came down the narrow staircase and stopped on the last step. He looked around the bunker, his hand resting on the gun that he’d tucked back in his waistband.

  “Where?” Bobby narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms in front of his chest. He straightened up to his full height, which was still only my height – a head smaller than Joshua, who he was obviously trying to stare down.

  Joshua gave a small shrug, unimpressed by Bobby’s macho antics. “Where the Weepers won’t hunt you down and gnaw on your bones.”

  “Weepers?”

  “Mutants.”

  “And why should we trust you?”

  I rolled my eyes at Bobby. “Stop acting up.”

  He opened his mouth, but Mom raised a finger. “That’s enough, Bobby. Let’s not waste time. Your dad…” Her voice shook, and she stopped mid-sentence. She cleared her throat. “…needs their help.”

  “It’s Sherry’s fault in the first place,” Bobby muttered. I flinched.

  “Bobby! Don’t you dare blame your sister.” Mom’s tone was final.

  Joshua came up next to Bobby and looked down at him. “I wouldn’t want to see you fight two Weepers. If you were alive after that, then you could talk.”

  To my surprise, Bobby stayed silent.

  Joshua turned to my mom. “Just take what you need with you. We don’t have much time.”

  Mia clung to my neck, her legs tightly wrapped around my waist. My arms protested, though she was nothing but skin and bones. I untangled her from my body and set her down. “Help Mom pack our things.”

  She gave an enthusiastic nod and dashed off. Grandma sat on the sofa, unperturbed by the events around her. She was knitting.

  Click. Click.

  No surprise there.

  “Grandma, we’re leaving,” I told her, in a voice I only used on her and Mia.

  She looked up from the pompom hat she was working on. “I won’t abandon Edgar.”

  Why couldn’t things be easy for once?

  Joshua looked at me and raised an eyebrow, mouthing the name. “Edgar?”

  “My grandfather,” I whispered. Not that Grandma would have heard me if I’d screamed – she was immersed in a tricky stitch. Joshua frowned and looked around the shelter. Of course, he couldn’t see Grandpa.

  “Listen, Erna, that’s enough. We have to leave now. You can’t stay here.” Mom walked towards Grandma and grasped her arm. Her face looked haggard, but she meant business.

  “I can and I will. I won’t come with you and nothing you say
can change that.” Grandma shook Mom off in an impressive display of strength for an old lady.

  “Grandma,” I said as calmly as possible, but I could hear the edge in my voice. I kneeled in front of her feet. “Grandpa is dead. I’m sure he won’t mind if you come with us.”

  Grandma smiled and patted my hand. “I’ve been with your grandpa since I was your age. Where he stays, there I’ll stay too. And if my time has come, then I’ll rest next to him.” She patted my hand once more before returning to her knitting. Grandpa and Grandma had left Bavaria together and emigrated to the States a few years before Dad’s birth. It had been Grandpa’s idea, but Grandma always said she would have followed him to the moon.

  Click. Click.

  I wanted to rip the needles from her hand and hurl them at the wall.

  Click. Click.

  I cast a look over my shoulder at Mom – maybe she could convince Grandma. But she shook her head and lifted Mia into her arms. “Fine, if she wants to stay here, let her stay.”

  “Mom?”

  She couldn’t mean that. But she turned away and walked towards the steps. Why did it always fall on me to sort out any mess? I straightened up, struggling to keep my temper. Joshua came to my side, his posture tense. He really didn’t like bunkers.

  “Where’s your grandpa?” he asked in a whisper.

  “In the freezer.”

  Joshua’s eyebrows shot up. He looked at the huge freezer next to the sofa.

  “He died six months ago.”

  Joshua considered the freezer. Then he said, “I think we can take your grandfather with us.” His voice was calm, as if he hadn’t just suggested we travel with a dead body.

  “What?” I stared at him. Was he serious?

  He was serious.

  He looked thoughtful. Maybe he was thinking of how best to manage it. Mom peered over her shoulder with an expression of disbelief. Her blonde eyebrows had nearly disappeared into her hairline.

  Bobby walked up to us, glancing between me and Joshua, his eyes as round as saucers. His cool facade had slipped and the younger brother I’d dared to eat earthworms was back.

  Joshua walked towards the freezer. He opened it and looked down – his expression giving no indication he was staring at a body that had been frozen for six months. Actually, it seemed to bother him less than being in the bunker.