Indiscretion

by Anderson, Callie

  Jealousy was something I had never experienced until recently. I envied Devon—her perfection, her beauty, that she was with the man I wanted most. A man I could never have.

  “Did you really think he would marry someone like you?” She tilted her head to the side, pity splashed on her face.

  “Like me?” All the manners my mother had embedded in me were gone. “Listen, bitch. You don’t know anything about me.”

  “Are you sure?” she asked and brought her finger to her lips. “There was the police report from Ohio and the one from Rhode Island. Not to mention, your mother’s train wreck of a life. I know everything about you. I mean yes, I can credit you for making something of yourself, but honey, you come from nothing, you are nothing, and you’ll always be nothing. Cole Rhoads will never fall in love with nothing.”

  My fingernails dug into my palms, and my heart pounded in my chest, each beat shattering it further. I had nothing to defend myself from her; my eyes glassed over. “It’s different between us,” I said weakly, and even as the words slipped from my lips, I knew they did nothing to hurt her.

  She took a step closer, invading my personal space as she crossed her arms over her perfect chest. “Aw, you think that you’re different. That’s sweet. Let me guess . . . He says he can’t get enough of you and shows up everywhere.” She laughed softly. “Cole is a boy. He becomes obsessed with a toy and will do everything he can to play with it. He will pay people to know where you are and show up unannounced. You are not special. You’re a toy he likes to fuck, and eventually, he will toss you to the side.” She turned on her heel, walking back toward the town car.

  My heart dropped when the words left her mouth. I wasn’t different to him. I was the same as everyone else he’d been with.

  Devon confirmed that I was merely another conquest.

  * * *

  I unpacked the groceries and changed into a light sundress as the temperature outside had risen drastically since morning. My tote carried my life: the briefs I needed to give to Howard and my study materials for the bar exam.

  I took a cab to the courthouse, so I wouldn’t be late. My legs pushed against the steps two at a time, my toes securing my flip-flops as I went. Inside the courthouse, the cool air soothed my warm skin. I found Howard and the associates deep in conversation. Not wanting to disturb them, I pulled the briefs from my bag and quietly walked the files over to him.

  Howard smiled pleasantly and nodded, mouthing, “Thank you.”

  I’d turned on my heel and was heading toward the exit when my heart began to flutter. The cool air suddenly felt hot as his fingers laced around the upper part of my arm, directing me to follow him. I looked behind me to see if anyone had seen us, wanting to shout for help, but my voice was no longer working.

  He led us to an empty stairwell and shoved the door open, pushing me inside like a rag doll. My back found the farthest wall as he stood with his back covering the door. Anyone could walk in and find us, but it didn’t seem to concern him. His black suit hugged him perfectly as he crossed his arms. I focused on my anger and not his appearance.

  I inhaled deeply as I pushed off the wall. Crossing my arms, I waited for Cole to say something—anything—to make the pain in my chest stop. Seconds had passed, and he still hadn’t said anything, I sighed.

  “Well? What do you want?”

  He closed the gap between us with a few long strides and pushed me against the wall. His hands found my hair and his lips came down on mine. The anger I felt for him temporarily dissipated. His tongue licked my lips, asking for permission to deepen the kiss. My mouth opened for him, and a whimper escaped my throat as his tongue invaded my mouth. The cold wall flat on my back and Cole’s firm body pushing into mine . . . Both were hugging me in that moment. His hand held my face, and with each stroke of his tongue, my lips glided along his.

  You are nothing.

  I placed my hands on his chest and pushed him away with all my might. “Don’t.” Tears crept into my eyes. “You can’t keep doing this to me. I’m not just another toy to play with or a notch on your belt. Stay away from me.”

  “Stay away from you? The way you kissed me doesn’t seem like you want me to stay away. You’re the one who showed up here,” Cole argued, his hands pressed against the wall on both sides of my face, caging me in.

  “I came for Howard, not you. And let me remind you, I didn’t pursue you. I didn’t follow you or show up at your job. You came after me, even after I told you repeatedly that we shouldn’t.” I pushed on his chest again. “Why? Because you were bored with Sammie or was Devon simply out of town?” Once more I tried to push him, but he didn’t budge.

  “Devon? What does she have to do with anything?” His brows furrowed as he shook his head. “And I’m not looking to make you another notch on my belt.” He smiled. “You’ve already done that a few times.”

  “Screw you,” I spat before trying to get around him.

  He held me in place, bringing his body closer to mine. “Look, I’m sorry for the things I said to you at your house. I’m not here to play games with you, Kat. I don’t chase women, but I also can’t seem to let you go, and that fucks with me.”

  I didn’t respond. I couldn’t. He was hot and cold, and I didn’t know where he was going with this. I didn’t know if this was the Cole I’d fallen for, or the Cole Devon was describing.

  His eyes changed in a second. He was hurt. Though he tried to hide it, his eyes told me a different story. “Is this a game for you?” he questioned. Still, I said nothing. “Get info on the defendant by fucking around with his lawyer? Was that it? Answer me that at least.” He pushed off the wall, releasing me as his hands ran through his hair.

  “No.” I wiped the tears from my face. “What I feel for you is real. I was doing the best I could to keep the case and us separate. You knew that. You wanted that. I never asked you about Evan or what you were working on. The few times we were together were about us, not our jobs. I tried to push you away. I tried to stay away.”

  I paced the empty landing before I looked at him, needing him to understand. “I practically stalked those women, expecting them to confide in me, wanting to prove to everyone that I’m somebody, that I know what I’m doing. That I’m going to be a good lawyer.”

  I ran my hands under my eyes, wiping my tears. “I dropped my clothes for you against my better judgment. I did things I never thought possible because of you, constantly ignoring the thought that this could ruin my career. I watch my phone, waiting for you to call or text. When the doors open in an elevator, I pray that it’s you coming in. My world has become you. I can’t breathe or focus on my job because I’m waiting for you. It’s as if you possess me . . . my judgment, my thoughts. You own me, Cole. I’m yours. I belong to you.”

  Cole moved toward me, his hands wrapped around my shoulders and held me in place. “I’m yours,” he shouted back. Rendered silent, I stared at him. “You own me. You control what I feel and what I do.” His hands released my shoulders and balled into fists. “This isn’t me, Katherine. I don’t do relationships. I don’t know how. You think this is what I expected from you? You were supposed to be some chick I took home from the club. A notch on my belt as you called it.”

  He stepped away, his hands running through his hair again, his words breaking my heart. “You changed all of that. For the first time, I wanted to see where this led. I see you everywhere . . . your smile, your eyes, your hair. Everywhere. But you’ve kept me at a distance from the start. You could have talked to me about Evan. You could have told me what you were doing. But you didn’t.”

  “We’ve already been over this. We agreed—”

  “You use the case as a reason not to see me. You’re researching those women for charges that have been dropped, putting yourself in danger and making it impossible for me to protect you. I don’t know what to do anymore.”

  “Protect me? I never asked you to protect me. I never asked for anything from you.” He recoiled as if I’d p
unched him. He’d regained his composure, his eyes were as cold as his voice.

  “I brought you in here to apologize for the way I spoke to you the other day, but it seems pointless now since you don’t need anything from me. You don’t want to let me in? Fine. You want to keep pushing me away? Fine. I’m gone.”

  He turned around, yanked open the heavy metal door, and reentered the busy courthouse, leaving me alone.

  23

  Katherine

  I arrived fifteen minutes early to Johnny Boy’s and asked to be seated outside so I could spot Mackenzie when she approached. My foot tapped nervously when I thought she wasn’t going to show. Picking at my manicure, I thought back to how much I liked Mackenzie and how badly I could use her friendship right now. The chair in front of me moved back, making me jump in my seat.

  “Hi,” she said in her raspy voice as she sat down.

  “Hi,” I replied, sliding my hands to the side of the table.

  An awkward silence hung between us.

  “Look . . .” She exhaled. “I only asked you here because Nikki insisted that I tell you what happened.” She reached into her purse, pulled out an envelope, and slid it over to me. “This is for the retainer. I want to hire you as my lawyer, and this way anything I say will be under attorney-client privilege.”

  I placed my hand on top of hers. “Mackenzie, I haven’t taken the bar yet, and I don’t have my license yet, but you have my word that I won’t say anything about what you tell me.”

  She pushed the envelope back to me. “I guess when you get your license, I’ll be your first client.”

  I nodded, taking the envelope from her. After the waiter brought our drinks and bread, she looked at me. I could tell by the cloudy look in her eyes that she was contemplating whether this was the smart thing to do.

  “Mackenzie, when I was a kid, my stepdad came into my bedroom and raped me almost every other night. It started when I was ten, I think. My mother never found out about it and I never had the courage to tell her. One day, he never came home. And then a week passed, then a month. He went to work one day and never came back and I thought it was all over. Then in college I saw him on a playground with another little girl and all I felt was guilt. I never said anything, and he just continued being the monster he always was. There was no case, and the charges were dropped.”

  She bit her lower lip. “I met Evan my senior year of college. My roommate, one that I’d shared a dorm with for two years, thought it would be cool to get our own place. Raquel had this boyfriend. I’d heard of him but had never met him. It was Thanksgiving weekend, and we had an awful blizzard that canceled my flight back home to Mississippi.” She laughed as she reflected.

  “I agreed to go with her to this house party her boyfriend, Chuck, was hosting. She was a great roommate, but a terrible friend. The second we arrived at his apartment, she left me to go fuck Chuck in the closest bedroom she could find. I stood in the corner watching each girl get approached by some guy, and then a few moments later, he’d follow her upstairs. Evan came and stood next to me. He said he was Chuck’s friend. He seemed friendly enough, so I stood there and talked to him for the rest of the night.

  “The next time Chuck had a party, Raquel insisted I go again. She said Evan really wanted to see me, so I went and stood in the corner and talked to him about school, work, and what my plans were for after college. We did that at a couple of different parties before he grew tired or possibly bored, I guess.”

  She closed her eyes, slowly shaking her head back and forth. Her voice was so low I had to lean in to hear her. “It was just after the New Year. I had come back early from visiting my parents because I had this big fight with my father. Wanting to rebel, I followed Raquel to another party, but this time I didn’t watch my liquor. I didn’t care. I felt comfortable around Evan and thought he wouldn’t disrespect me. I remember I asked him to follow me to the bathroom. He guided me up the steps, holding on to my waist as I took each step. It wasn’t until I reached the top step that I realized I had a little more to drink than I should have.”

  She exhaled slowly. Taking a break, she sipped on her drink. “Sorry, I haven’t told this story in a long time.”

  “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” Though I wanted her to continue, I couldn’t push her. Not when her hands were shaking and her dark brown eyes were glassy with tears.

  “No, it’s okay.” She removed the straw from her drink and took a big gulp. “After I used the restroom, Evan stood in the hallway, waiting for me. He asked if I wanted to lie down for a bit because I didn’t look well, so I followed him into one of the bedrooms. When he locked the door behind him, he changed from the nice guy I’d met to a monster.”

  My stomach turned with Mackenzie’s story, and the back of my neck dampened with cold sweat.

  “He pushed me onto the bed, and I sobered up quickly. The music in the house was too loud for anyone to hear my screams, but he pinned me to the bed, placing his forearm on my throat and threatening to crush my windpipe if I fought him. He slid his jeans down before he ripped my leggings off. My joints locked with fear, and I trembled as tears dripped from my eyes. I kept begging him to stop, telling him I didn’t want this, but he held me by my hair and told me that whores aren’t allowed to say no.”

  “Stop,” I shouted, shaking my head, needing to get that image out of my mind. “I’m sorry, it’s just—”

  “I know.”

  “Why did you drop the charges?”

  “When he was done, he wrote out a check and left it on the nightstand, thanking me for my services. The feeling in my limbs returned, I grabbed the check and left the party, heading straight for the cops. I went to the police, they made a rape kit, but I wasn’t physically hurt. I didn’t have any of his skin under my nails, and there was no semen to collect since he used a condom. There was little to go on other than my word. The next day he showed up at my door with a tape in hand. What I hadn’t realized was that Chuck was running his own mini brothel out of his apartment, and Raquel had been moonlighting as a call girl.”

  Holy shit.

  She paused in her story when the waiter brought us both a new round. “What was on the tape?”

  “Chuck made sure that every common room in his home had a camera recording the entire party. Evan handed me an edited copy that showed us cozied up in the corner at every party I’d attended. I had no idea Raquel was working as a call girl, or I never would have gone. The last scene on the tape was of me following him into the bedroom, stumbling and smiling at him. Asshole said not to worry, that I could keep that video and he would mail his copy to the prosecutor.”

  “Fuck. Mackenzie . . .” I grabbed her hands. “I’m sorry that happened to you.”

  “I didn’t have a case. It was my word against his.” She shrugged as she brought the cloth napkin up to wipe her tears.

  The fucking asshat made sure all his bases were covered.

  My hands massaged my scalp as I replayed what Mackenzie just told me. I wanted more than anything to get that rat bastard behind bars, but he was smarter than most. “Wait, you said he gave you a check?”

  “Yeah, why?”

  “Did you keep it? Wouldn’t the check be leverage in your favor?” My mind replayed her story. “He paid you for sex.”

  “It doesn’t matter. It wasn’t even his check.” She reached for the bread on the table.

  “What do you mean? He gave you a check that wasn’t his? You said you watched him sign it.” I couldn’t hide the hope in my voice. Please, God, tell me this asshole was dumb enough to sign someone else’s check.

  “He pulled out a checkbook from his blazer, then I watched him fill it out and leave it there.” She tore her bread in half and spread butter on it.

  This was music to my ears. “Do you still have a copy of the check? Or do you know the name of the person it belonged to?” Underneath the table, I crossed my fingers, hoping and praying that she’d kept the check.

  “
Mmm hmm.” She nodded, chewing the food in her mouth. I sat at the edge of my seat, waiting for her to swallow. “Boris Zolin. I have three copies stored in three different safety deposit boxes, plus the original.”

  I know that name . . .

  “Holy shit.” I pulled my cell phone out of my back pocket and opened my emails. Mackenzie’s eyes looked frantic as I looked for the email I’d sent to myself with Evan Seymour’s client list. The Excel spreadsheet opened on my tiny screen, and I scrolled all the way to the end.

  Boris Zolin.

  “Oh, my God.” My hands began to shake.

  “Katherine? What is it?”

  “You hold the proof that could win Natasha’s case. What he did was fraudulent. We could settle out of court or bring him to trial and drag his name through the mud.” I smiled wide at her, but her expression didn’t mirror mine. Instead, I noticed fear in her eyes. “Mackenzie?”

  “I can’t . . . I can’t give it to you. I’m sorry.”

  “What? Why not? Not only can Natasha win her lawsuit and get her job back, but we can also use this to build a criminal case against him, put him behind bars where he belongs.” I couldn’t believe what she was saying.

  “The only reason I never signed an NDA is because I have that check. It’s my leverage. He knows he fucked up by using his client’s checkbook, but it’s the only freedom I have. My father is a state senator in Mississippi, and if Evan finds out that anyone else knows about that check, there is nothing stopping him from uploading the tape of me at Chuck’s house and destroying my father’s career.”

  “Fuck.” I pinched the bridge of my nose, praying I could catch a break for once. I couldn’t force her to hand over the check, but I planned to convince her whatever way I could.