Skin (McCullough Mountain 2)
Page 13
* * * *
Finn awoke and it took him a split second to remember where he was. Mallory’s bed. He grinned in the dimly shadowed room and snuggled into her softness. She was so damn cozy. And she smelled incredible, like peaches or apricots or some other girly shit.
Her hair was a wild mess and tickled his nose as he nestled into the back of her shoulder. He didn’t want to wake her, but at the same time, he did. He wanted to glide his hand up a little higher and explore her curves, feel the weight of her unbound breasts in his hands.
Settle down, McCullough.
Very aware that he was packing some wood, he resisted the urge to flex his hips into hers. Shit. It was growing. He tried to wiggle back some, but Mallory made the most adorable snuffle sound and stiffened. She was awake.
They must have been sleeping there for at least an hour. “You awake?”
She whined something between a yes and a sound of distress. He gently massaged her hip and snuggled closer. No point trying to hide what he couldn’t.
“Finn?”
“Yeah?”
“What are you doing?”
“Cuddling.”
“Oh.”
They were silent for over a minute. Then she said, “I should get up.”
He tightened his fingers over her hip. “Not yet.”
She sure woke up tense. The tips of his fingers fanned over her hip and found a pocket of warmth when he reached soft skin. Her hand snapped down over his. “Don’t.”
He stilled, not sure what to do. He was only touching her side. There really wasn’t anything sexual about it—sort of. “Okay,” he said in a measured, calm voice.
She lifted her hand from his and he moved his palm to her outer thigh—nothing but cotton there. It wasn’t as nice, but he was still touching her. He couldn’t seem to make himself not touch her.
“I need to get up,” she said.
His hand abandoned her thigh and went to the tangled mess of hair lying over the pillow. Gathering the stands and pulling them out of the way, he kissed the back of her soft neck. “Wait. Lay here with me a little longer.”
She didn’t argue, but her body didn’t relax. Pressing soft kisses into the curve of her neck and shoulder, he rubbed her arm and tried to ease her. “I like kissing you.”
“Well, I just woke up and I need to brush my teeth.”
Ignoring her, he tugged the collar of her shirt back and kissed over the soft skin above her shoulder blade. “You have a freckle here.” He licked over the soft brown mark.
Her shoulders shifted. He wasn’t sure if she was trying to nudge him off or if he was giving her the chills. He continued to place slow, gentle kisses over her shoulders, neck, and back.
She drew in a shaky breath and he sensed he was breaking down her walls. Giving her shoulder a gentle tug, he rasped, “Come here.”
When she resisted, he applied a bit of pressure, and eased her onto her back. Her expression was blank as she blinked up at him. He fit his body over hers, careful not to crush her. Her unsupported breasts filled her T-shirt and there was no mistaking the press of her nipples against the worn fabric.
His lips sealed to her neck as he tickled his tongue up to her ear. She sighed, but her body still remained stiff. When he closed his lips over the tender lobe of her ear she gasped and arched. Trumpets of victory hummed in his head as he caught a glimpse of the passion she kept so bottled up. He sucked her lobe and teased the shell of her ear with his tongue. Her breath was raspy and coming faster. Taking a risk he ground his pelvis into hers and she made the softest gasp.
She was so fucking hot. His hands sifted through her tangled hair and cupped her head. His mouth made a slow journey to hers. When his lips touched the corner of hers she turned away.
“Hey,” he whispered softly. “Let me kiss you.”
“I just woke up,” she said in a pleading voice. Her eyes blinked up at him so innocently it only fueled the fire building inside of him. He would never rush her into anything. He could wait for the bigger stuff, but he needed to kiss her.
“I don’t care.”
“Finn—”
“Are you turned on right now, Mallory? Be honest. Please.”
She was quiet for several beats and then she quietly said, “Extremely.”
Finally! “Then let me kiss you,” he said just as his lips closed over hers.
She was stubborn, keeping her mouth sealed tight. But he wanted in. He pressed his tongue over the seam of her lips until she finally opened. Sweeping his tongue deeply, he kissed her with all the passion he held.
She slowly softened until her efforts to not give over were futile. When he felt her small hands curl over his shoulders he felt like his team just won the Super Bowl with all his money riding on it. He growled and deepened the kiss, pulling her tightly to him.
Her knees tightened on his hips as he ground into her sex. Jesus, he hadn’t made out like this in years. Hands pulled, heads dipped, and backs arched. It was already qualifying as one of the hottest sexual experiences he’d had since being a kid.
When things got a bit too intense, he pulled away, and pressed his head into her shoulder to catch his breath. “Jesus, Mallory. Kissing you is like…I don’t even know what. Give me a second.”
He shouldn’t have stopped. Once he gave her a moment to clear her head, the walls resurrected. He could almost hear the echo of brick slamming down around her. Pressing his lips to the soft skin below her ear—magic spot—he said, “You’re so hot.”
Wrong thing to say. Her body grew as tense as a corpse and she nudged him to get off. “I can’t breathe,” she muttered.
He eased back and she maneuvered out from under him. In a matter of seconds she was standing, adjusting her clothes, and looking anywhere but at the bed.
“You okay?”
“Fine.” The answer was too high pitched and quick to be true.
“Did I say something wrong?”
“No. I’ll be back.” She left the room like her bed was on fire.
He stood and adjusted the blue Smurf village setting up camp in his pants. Well, maybe Smurf wasn’t the best way to describe his body at that moment. There was definitely a code blue in play, but there was nothing small about it.
When she didn’t return, he headed out to the living room and found her at the kitchen counter drinking a bottle of water. “You okay?”
“Mm—hmm.” She was lying.
She chugged the water and proceeded to dig around in the fridge. He crept up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. She jumped and slammed the top of her head into the freezer door causing all the jars in the fridge rattled.
“Jesus, Philly, are you all right?”
She stood and rubbed her head. “I’m fine. Stop asking if I’m okay. I’m fine. Fine.”
He held up his hands. “All right. But you just whacked your head pretty hard. Do you want some ice?”
Her eyes were wild and then abruptly they glazed with tears. He stepped closer to comfort her, but she held up a hand. “Don’t. I’m fine.”
Frustrated, he said, “You’re obviously not fine. You look ready to cry.”
Her lashes fluttered so rapidly he knew she was trying to hide it. Unfortunately, one lone tear slipped past and landed on her breast, turning the cotton of her shirt dark gray.
“I think you should go.” He wasn’t expecting that.
Feeling the returning sting of her rejection, he stepped back. “What? Why?”
“Because…I just think you should go.”
Fuck that.
He stepped closer and caught the hand trying to hold him at bay. Her other hand continued to rub her head where an egg was likely forming. “I don’t want to go,” he said, replacing the hand on her head with his own. Yup, there was a lump.
He kissed her hair and pulled her into a hug. She was tense and he wasn’t sure why. “Mallory, if I did something wrong, tell me. I mean, aside for startling you and making you whack your head.”
He laughed and rubbed a hand down her back. “I know, but I like you that way.”
She pushed him away and took a step back. Looking at the ground, she frowned and wrung her hands. “I…I don’t know how to do this with you.”
“Do what?”
She waved her hand in the air as if that explained things. “The…kissing…and stuff.”
“Seemed to me you know how to kiss just fine.”
Her lips twisted and she shot him a sardonic look. “You know what I mean.”
“No, I don’t. Explain it to me.”
She sighed. “We’re friends, Finn. If we cross that line there’s no uncrossing it.”
“So?”
“So aren’t you worried we’ll wreck our friendship?”
Well, yes, he’d thought of that, but…he wanted her. He wanted her badly. Not just once, either. He needed to have her. He didn’t have friends like Mallory. She was special. His instincts told him that the two of them as a couple would be incredible. Once in his head, he couldn’t convince himself to back down. This was right. “I won’t let that happen.”
“You can’t promise it won’t,” she argued.
“I’m not a jerk, Mallory. I’d never stop being your friend. I’m just not that type of guy.”
“Well, I don’t know if I’m the type of girl who can have sex with someone and then go back to being friends.”
He held up his hands. “Whoa! Who’s having sex?”
Her mouth opened and closed. “Well…I thought…” She covered her face with her palms. “Oh, God, never mind. I’m such an idiot.”
He had to laugh. She was adorably confused. He grabbed her forearm and pulled her to the couch.
When he sat down beside her, he said, “Mallory, if we eventually have sex, that’s something we will deal with then. Right now, I promise you, we aren’t. You can trust me. Let down your guard. I’d never rush into sex with you until we discussed it—not when we’re all wrapped up in each other’s bodies and incapable of thinking clearly. I mean we’ll discuss it like two mature adults considering taking their relationship to the next level. You would know when I planned on sleeping with you, because I would have to know you planned the same. Consensual.”
“But people get carried away—”
“I don’t. It’s difficult. I’ll admit I was pretty turned on in bed with you, but I had it under control. I know when to stop.”
She looked at her lap and mumbled, “Sometimes there are things more intimate than actual sex. When we were kissing…I don’t think I’ve ever been kissed like that. It was…different.”
Thank God!
“I felt that too. It’s us. That’s what I’m talking about. We’re attracted to each other—really attracted. If we try to ignore it, that may be what ruins our friendship. I’m not asking you for anything you aren’t willing to give. You say stop and I stop. But I don’t know if I can go too long without being able to touch you. I loved napping with you and waking up with you in my arms.”
She twisted her lips. “Yeah, well, I’m not used to being touched.”
“I noticed. Why is that? You had to have had boyfriends back in Philly.”
She shrugged. “I guess.”
“You guess?”
“I mean I had friends that were guys. I’m not a virgin, but…I’ve never slept with a guy.”
“You’re not a virgin, but you’ve never slept with a guy?”
“I’ve had sex. Several times. I’m not a whore or anything. I’ve been with three men. Well, the first time I was seventeen, so actually, he was a kid. But as an adult there were two others.”
“Okay.” This was good to know. “Do you want to know how many people I’ve been with?”
“Oh, God. No thanks. You probably have a list of beauties. Knowing will only make me more self-conscious.”
“One.”
Her head kicked up and her eyes bore into his. “One?”
He grinned and nodded. “One. I lost my virginity to Erin senior year after the homecoming game and I’ve never been with anyone else.”
“How is that possible? Have you seen you?”
He chuckled. She saw him as something he wasn’t. He was just an average guy. Of all the McCullough siblings, he was probably the least interesting.
“It’s not about looks. Sleeping with someone is about sharing that intimate connection, feeling like you’re home when you’re in their arms. I mean, sure, it can be exciting and great, but without that emotional link, I’d rather pass.”
She stared at him, slack-jawed, for several seconds. “Are you for real?”
“Yeah. Why?”
Shaking her head, she said, “Where I’m from, guys don’t think like that, at least not the guys I know.”
“Maybe that’s why you haven’t found the right guy yet.”
“Or maybe it’s me.”
He grabbed her chin and forced her to meet his gaze. “Hey, I can assure you it’s not you. You’re beautiful, sexy, smart, and funny. Those guys were assholes if they didn’t see you for who you are, but I’m sort of glad they didn’t. If they did, you might not be here with me.”
When she smiled he felt like he may have gotten through to her on some level. It wasn’t right, how hard she was on herself. So what if she wasn’t a size two? Most women weren’t. After marriage people had families and all that superficial stuff went out the window anyway. She needed to stop beating herself up. He put a stop to the image put-downs, but sensing she might still think she wasn’t good enough really pissed him off.
“I’m sort of glad, too,” she admitted quietly. “Next to all the guys back home, none of them can even compare to you.”
His chest tightened at the compliment. He wasn’t used to hearing things like that about himself. It felt nice. He pulled her into a hug and kissed the top of her head. “Thank you. That was really nice.”
“It’s true.”
He settled back into the couch with her, refusing to let her go. “You know what this means now, don’t you?”
“What?”
“It means you’re my girlfriend.”
He flinched as she poked him in the stomach. “No, I’m not. You have to ask.”
He sighed dramatically. “Will you be my girlfriend?”
“Maybe you should have one of your friends pass me a note so I can circle yes or no if I like like you.”
“Are you making fun of me?”
“Yes.”
He bit her shoulder and she squeaked. When he faced her, he said, “Philly, I like like you. Will you go steady with me and wear my pin?”
She held out her hand and smiled.
He stared at her open palm. “What?”
“Where’s the pin?”
“Oh. I don’t have one. But I’ll get you one.”
She rolled her eyes. “That’s so anti-climactic.”
“Does that mean yes?” he asked.
She pulled out of his grip, grabbed the notepad on the table, and scribbled something. When she flashed it at him it said ‘yes’ with the word circled.
A shit-eating grin spread over his face. “You know what this means now, don’t you?”
“What?”
“I get to kiss you whenever I want.” He lunged at her and she squealed, but soon he silenced her with his lips.
Chapter Ten
The following week was fantastic. The sky was a little bluer. The changing autumn leaves seemed more radiant. The chatter of children playing outside her office window at recess sounded more harmonized. And she breathed a little easier. Why? Because she had a boyfriend!
Only because it was completely inappropriate to doodle hearts with her and Finn’s initials all over the attendance sheets, did she resist the urge. But the temptation was definitively the
re. All week long she had a proud version of her own voice cheering in her head, which kept a smile pasted on her face.
Who’s that sexy mountain man?
My boyfriend!
Which McCullough is the cutest?
My boyfriend!
Where were you last night?
Out with my boyfriend!
Did you kiss him?
Oh yeah! I kissed him! I kissed him up real nice!
She’d regressed to the age of fifteen, but was doing a good impression of a woman in her thirties. How the hell had she gone thirty years and not once known what it was to have a real boyfriend? She was walking around like she defined awesomeness and there was nothing that could hinder her mood.
Student sent to the office for putting gum in Tiffany’s hair—no problem. She smiled at him and gave him a piece of candy from the jar on her desk, convincing herself he probably did it because he like liked her. She saw everything differently. Gone was the cynic and in came the optimist.
The craziest realization was that she—for the first time ever—started to consider that she might actually be sexy. Maybe. Finn thought she was.
They’d exchanged phone numbers and he had made a point to text her regularly. Mostly little things, like ‘How’s your day going?’ or ‘Thinking of you.’ Or—her personal favorite—‘Can’t wait to see you and kiss that soft spot by your ear.’
She was a goner, but she didn’t care. Finn was probably the nicest guy she’d ever met. And the sexiest. And the best kisser. And he was hers! She really needed to get that pin he’d talked about, so others knew it.
At night, she’d stare up at her ceiling. Daydreams of kissing and hanging out with Finn turned into night dreams that entailed a whole lot more. She could fantasize about naked stuff in her dreams, because when she slept, she saw herself differently. It was as though her soul shaped her body and she liked who she was.
She’d started running an extra mile that week. Knowing Finn wanted her—her—motivated her to be the woman he deserved. She was down a total of twenty-one pounds. Less than nine away from her first major benchmark. Every time she felt like quitting, she told herself if she hadn’t gotten this far a man like Finn might have never noticed her in the first place.