Accidentally Yours

by Susan Mallery

  Kerri wished she had note cards, because currently she couldn’t remember anything about the message. Helping? Healing? She felt her palms getting damp.

  “I’m not going to panic,” she murmured quietly. “This is me—panic free. I’m calm and serene.”

  Tina looked at her. “You’re also miked. Keep the chanting to yourself at a minimum unless you want the whole country to know about it.”

  “Right.” She knew that. “Ah, this is local, right? We’re not really talking about the whole country.”

  “Your interview is with the local affiliate, but if it’s interesting enough, it could be picked up nationally.”

  Kerri’s chest tightened. Nausea rose in her throat, nearly gagging her.

  “I might have to pass out,” she said, hoping she either passed out or vomited. She’d seen enough medical shows to know doing both at the same time was risky, not to mention disgusting.

  Tina settled across from her. “We’re going to start now. Remember, the interviewer isn’t your friend. It’s his or her job to make you think you’re friends so you say things you didn’t plan on saying, but the reality is you want different things. You want to get out your message and the interviewer wants a great story. Are you ready?”

  Kerri nodded. She did her best to ignore the camera, the flipping of her stomach, the bright lights and the burning need to hyperventilate.

  Tina smiled. “Kerri, thanks so much for agreeing to this interview. You find yourself in what I’m guessing is a very uncomfortable situation.”

  Kerri opened her mouth, then closed it. Don’t answer the question before it’s asked, she reminded herself. She smiled.

  Tina raised her eyebrows, then nodded. “So, you blackmailed Nathan King into giving you fifteen million dollars for your dying son. How did that happen?”

  Kerri drew in a breath. “Nathan donated money to a medical research facility working on finding a way to cure and prevent Gilliar’s Disease. It’s a horrible, painful sickness that’s devastating for both the children and their families. As a parent, there’s nothing I can do to stop my son’s disease from progressing. It’s beyond helplessness. I would take the disease myself if I could. I hate what’s happening and I can’t stop it.”

  Tina stared at her. “Excellent. You’ve made me the bad guy and all of America wants to send you flowers.”

  “I’d rather they donated the money to find a cure.”

  “Good point. Okay, let’s try another question. Nathan King seems to be using you and your son to shore up his questionable reputation so he can build a high-rise condo complex the average American could never afford to live in. Do you mind being used to line his pockets and rape the environment?”

  Kerri laughed. “Shouldn’t that be rape and pillage the environment? No one is going to ask that.”

  “They may. How will you answer?”

  Kerri didn’t have a clue. Then she remembered that she was supposed to stay on message. “I don’t know anything about Mr. King’s business interests. I’m a single mom who makes her living as a hairdresser in a small town. My goal is to be a good mother, raise my son right and keep him from dying. There’s not much time for anything else in my day.”

  “Are you sleeping with Nathan King?”

  “Could you ask a more tacky question?”

  Tina hesitated. “Okay—that’s not what we talked about, but I like it. Make sure you’re feeling outraged. It gives your answer more emotion.”

  “I am outraged. It’s no one’s business and not the point.”

  “People are interested.”

  “Let them get their own guy.”

  Tina grinned. “You’re going to do just fine.”

  “I hope so.”

  She owed Nathan and she wanted to pay him back. The irony was she also wanted to sleep with him. Which meant if the question was whether she wanted to go bed with Nathan, outrage was going to be a little difficult to come by.

  FRANKIE SIPPED her latte and counted silently. One, two, three, four. The numbers soothed her as they always did. They allowed her to breathe slowly, evenly, bringing her heart rate down.

  There was comfort in the familiar. Comfort in the ritual.

  When she was done, she glanced at her watch, knowing that Grant wasn’t late, that she had been early. She couldn’t help herself. Being early mattered, even though it meant waiting.

  She arranged the three napkins she’d taken and sipped her drink. Anger burned at the edges of her consciousness, like a sense of dread she couldn’t escape.

  It hadn’t worked. The story hadn’t hurt Nathan nearly enough. Sure, people had wanted to talk about what a rich bastard he was and how he should be stopped, but no one had done anything. No one had stepped forward to make it happen. Worse, he was back in the papers, but in a good way. Just that morning there had been pictures of him at some stupid parade in Songwood. He’d been smiling. Happy. He didn’t deserve to be happy.

  She frowned as she remembered the article itself. How he’d been so charming and self-deprecating about Nathan King Appreciation Day. Like he was embarrassed. Like he didn’t love every minute of the attention. She hated him. Hated him. Hated him.

  Her chest tightened and she started counting again. She’d just finished the first set of numbers when Grant walked into the Starbucks and crossed to where she was seated.

  “You should buy something,” she told him. “It’s what you’re supposed to do.”

  “I don’t like their coffee,” he said as he sat down across from her and smiled. “It’s good to see you, Frankie. You look nice.”

  She blinked at him. What did he mean by that? What did he want? She didn’t look nice—she looked the same. Nothing was different.

  “It’s not working,” she said. “People aren’t mad enough at Nathan. It was a good story, but no one cares. We have to make them care. I have information on the sound, on what’s happening there. Statistics. Do you know how many species of plants and marine life are dying out every year? The Black Oystercatcher is living on borrowed time. There are maybe ten Island Marble butterflies left. All this matters,” she told him.

  Grant leaned back in his chair. “You’re not interested in me, are you?”

  “What?”

  “In me. This is all just about your brother.”

  “What else is there?”

  “I thought you might be into me. You know, as a guy.”

  “Why?”

  His smile turned rueful. “You’re an attractive woman, Frankie. A little strange, but I like that. You’re passionate, you’re smart.”

  Was he making fun of her? She felt her face get hot. “I’m already helping you get Nathan. You don’t have to say that other stuff.”

  “I’m not saying it for a reason other than I want to. I find you interesting. Maybe we could go out sometime. To dinner maybe. Or lunch. Lunch is pretty safe.”

  Was he talking about a date? She didn’t date. She couldn’t remember the last time a guy had asked. Dating.

  She tried to get her mind around the concept, but it was difficult. It was like that part of her was dead. She could remember high school and liking boys and going out, but not for a long time. Not since what had happened.

  “I can’t,” she whispered. “It’s too hard.”

  “Okay. I won’t push you.”

  His voice was gentle, as if he liked her. She tried to remember the last time someone had liked her.

  For a moment, it was like the sun coming out on a cloudy day. There was a burst of light and a sense of warmth, of belonging. She could see possibilities. Normal, she thought. She could be normal. It was always there, just out of reach. If she was willing to get help…

  No. No. This was better. Focus. She could focus on Nathan. On what he was. On how he’d hurt her. He’d lied. He hadn’t come back. He’d left her alone with the blood.

  “Part of the problem is Kerri Sullivan,” Grant said. “She’s a natural. She comes across as honest and engaging. It’s a p
owerful combination. Plus she has that sick kid. She’s the underdog. You can’t fight that.”

  “She’s lying.”

  “I don’t know that she is and I’m not sure it matters. Plus it’s obvious that the kid likes your brother. Kids and dogs. If they like a person, then he must be okay.”

  She didn’t want to think about the boy. That reminded her of Daniel. Daniel, whom she missed. Nathan had loved that little boy.

  “The planning commission will be meeting soon,” she said. “We have to come up with something before the meeting.”

  Grant leaned toward her. “Frankie, I like you a lot. I respect your lack of interest in me, so I’m going to tell you the truth. You can’t do anything to hurt Nathan. It’s too late. He’s either going to get the permits or he’s not. I’m out of it. I’ve been chasing him for too many years and I’ve always come up empty. I’m going to move on.”

  “I don’t understand. You can’t give up.” She needed him. He hated Nathan. They had that in common.

  “I’m going to L.A. I’m tired of the rain and the disappointments. I’d rather chase celebrities and take pictures than keep beating my head against the wall. You should think about letting it go, too. You’re still young. Live your life. Find somebody. Be happy.”

  He rose. “Good luck, Frankie.”

  And then he was gone.

  She stared after him, unable to believe he’d given up and walked out. How could he? She clutched her coffee in her hands and counted quickly, repeating the numbers in her head until she could think clearly.

  She could still do this, she told herself. She didn’t need Grant. She would keep on fighting…she would destroy her brother. Even if it killed her. Even if. Because there was a voice inside of her. One that warned that if Nathan went down, she just might go down with him.

  “YOU’RE A CELEBRITY,” Linda said when Kerri walked into her office.

  “Hardly.”

  “I saw your interview. You did great.”

  “I had a media coach who asked a lot harder questions than the woman from that afternoon talk show. It was pretty easy.” Kerri waited while her friend collected her purse so they could go to lunch. “Not that I want to repeat the experience. It was freakish to be in a studio, answering questions. Not my thing.”

  “You were great and you looked good, which is just as important.”

  Kerri laughed. “It is, which is weird of us, but there we are.”

  Linda grabbed a file from her desk. “I have to drop this off in the lab. It will just take a second.”

  “Not a problem.”

  Kerri walked with her down the long corridor. She hadn’t been in the research center since she’d shown up several weeks ago to yell at Dr. Wallace. Back then the building had been quiet and dimly lit. Now it was bright and bustling. There were dozens of people in white lab coats going from room to room. The air was warm and filled with…something. Promise, maybe, although that could be wishful thinking on her part.

  They stopped in front of a large lab. Kerri could see through the glass into a big room with workstations and complicated equipment and people wearing masks and goggles.

  “That’s a little scary,” she said. “What are they doing?”

  “You want the scientific details?”

  “I wouldn’t understand them.”

  “Then they’re working on a cure. Let me give them this paperwork and we can head out. How about Chinese?”

  “Sounds good.”

  Linda disappeared through a door next to the lab. Kerri watched the scientists at work but had no idea what they were doing.

  “Mrs. Sullivan.”

  She turned and saw Dr. Wallace walking toward her.

  “Hi. I’m waiting for Linda. She’s dropping something off and then we’re going to lunch.”

  “I see. Well, good.” He paused and looked at her, as if expecting more.

  She cleared her throat. “So, is it going well here?”

  “We have several plans of attack. This group here is looking at how enzymes interact with the immune system. Popular wisdom points us in other directions, but I keep a small team working here. I still think there’s something we’re missing. I may be wrong. But with the additional money Mr. King provided, I’ve added more equipment to help us find out.”

  Kerri crossed her arms over her chest. “Nathan gave you more money?”

  “Five hundred thousand. I thought you knew.”

  “He never said anything.”

  “He phoned a couple of weeks ago. He said I could have whatever I needed. Of course what we really need is focus and time. Time is the most important thing. There isn’t enough.”

  He stopped talking and looked uncomfortable, as if he realized time was her enemy, as well.

  She sucked in a breath. “I need to ask you something. I’ve been wondering…”

  Did she want to know? But she had to hear the truth, even if it was ugly.

  “Is it my fault Cody’s sick? Could I have done something while I was pregnant? Is it genetic?”

  “No,” Dr. Wallace said without hesitation. “It’s nothing you did. It’s not chemically induced or transmitted through food. A gene goes wrong. Who is to say why? A random chance event? Bad luck? As for genetics, I can’t say. There is no indication it passes from parent to child. Siblings are no more at risk than the general population. We know it attacks children, mostly boys. Hormones are a possibility. Hormones and the enzymes. I know there’s something there.”

  He continued talking, but she wasn’t listening. She was trying to figure out if it was okay for it not to be her fault.

  “So it could still be me,” she said.

  “Do you need it to be you?” he asked. “Do you need someone to blame? Someone other than fate or God or circumstance?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Blame me,” he told her. “Blame me for stopping. For not moving forward. For not believing in myself enough.”

  “I can’t.”

  “Then why can you blame yourself?”

  Good point. “I’m not sure this is the right time for logic.”

  One corner of his mouth lifted. “Life is hard enough, child. Don’t make it more than it is.”

  “Thank you.”

  “I have done nothing.”

  “But you will. I have faith.”

  “The expectation of miracles is a heavy burden.”

  “I know,” she told him. “I’m sorry to put that on you.”

  “It doesn’t weigh as much as blame.” He nodded at her and walked into the lab. A few seconds later, Linda came out.

  “Ready?” her friend asked.

  Kerri nodded. She glanced back at the lab one last time. Would the miracle happen in time? She didn’t know and found herself grateful that she couldn’t see into the future. Without knowing the outcome, it was a whole lot easier to have hope.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  REX WAS POSSIBLY the most handsome man Kerri had ever seen in person. He was tall, blond and muscular to the point of being intimidating. If his hands and feet were any indication, he could probably make a living starring in porn films. When he put his hands on her waist and thigh, she practically had to cover her mouth to keep from giggling.

  “We will strap you in here and here,” he said, his voice faintly accented. Rex had been born in Germany. “It is not comfortable, but it is secure. You are not a professional. Secure is better, yes?”

  “Oh, yes. I’m big on secure. Use whatever you want.”

  “We will have to cut part of your costume for the straps. The skirt will help hide the lines.”

  “I’ll just sew it up later. Not a problem.”

  “Good.”

  He reached for a harness and had her step into it. His big hands worked the buckles and Velcro, touching her inner thighs and crotch in the process. Kerri braced herself for the explosion of sensation—after all it had been nearly a decade since a man had touched her there. But she felt nothing. Not a quiver or
a hint of yearning. Just the need to giggle.

  Not good news, she told herself. She was always hot and frothy when she was around Nathan. She wanted to be able to reassure herself that her reaction was about need and not the man, because if she was wrong, she was in big trouble.

  After he finished strapping her in, Rex stood. “You will lean into your jump. Like this.”

  He demonstrated by holding his arms out at his sides and leaning forward, like a runner straining for the finish line.

  “You aren’t making the jump on your own. You’ll be pulled forward, and gravity will help. The lines are made from a special material that is practically clear. From a distance, they almost disappear. We’ll use smoke to blur the scene, as well.”

  “Won’t people wonder why there’s smoke?”

  Rex shrugged, several large, impressive muscles bunching and releasing. “It is the only way. Making someone appear to fly in the real world is a challenge, Kerri. We are doing the best we can.”

  He sounded almost hurt. She smiled up at him. “You’re being wonderful and I really appreciate it. I know this is a lot of work and not how you usually spend your day.”

  “Working on movies is not always interesting, but they pay very well and my job makes it easy to get women into bed.”

  “Always an important consideration.”

  “I like women,” he said, then grinned. “Actually I like sex.”

  “Why am I not surprised?”

  “Are you busy later? We could go to dinner.”

  “Me?” She doubted she was his usual groupie type. Rex was gorgeous and seeing him naked would provide a memory that would stay with her forever. She supposed she should be flattered. She was pushing thirty and not the least bit glamorous.

  Her gaze slid a little left to where a familiar man in a well-tailored suit stood while talking on his cell phone. His mouth thinned with what she guessed was impatience and she had a flash of sympathy for whoever had just screwed up. Nathan didn’t suffer fools.