As much as it hurt, even I had to admit that they looked good together, even without the retouching and filters that everybody added. They looked happy and natural. This was the kind of girl that guys like Adam should date, not moody dreamers like me who preferred old books over whichever Korean boy band was hot right now.
The hows and whens of their budding romance were still being hotly debated, with nobody coming up with any definitive answers. But, Angelique had been working on bagging him for a while, so nobody was really surprised...except me.
By lunchtime, speculation had turned to innuendo. By the end of the day, even Eva had chimed in on the Forum to “wholeheartedly” ask everybody to give her brother and his new girlfriend some space, thus confirming that they were officially dating and shocking me even further. The last person Eva should ever want Angelique to end up with was her brother. And then to give them her blessing…
By the last period of the day, I was numb. As hard as it was, I decided to focus on my work and ignore everything else. No listening to background chatter. No listening to the teacher as she tried to get everyone in line.
When all else failed, Math was a soothing constant in a chaotic universe, so I dug myself in deep. I did my work and then ignored the instructions that followed. Tuning the world out, I ran through my textbook like I was entering a Math marathon. Problem after problem, I tackled each, feeling at least a little satisfied that there was something in this world I could solve.
When the bell rang for the end of the day, I felt like I’d spent an eternity being tossed around by waves. I hung back in the classroom, organizing my notes until I was sure that the building was almost empty. I was bruised but unbroken. I considered that a win and I needed all of the wins I could get.
The universe, however, wasn’t satisfied with my position. As though my heart hadn’t been slaughtered enough, I turned the corner, only to walk right into Adam.
His gaze was fixed on mine, his lips parting. “Hey, Anna, can I talk to you?”
I almost ignored him. Almost. Outside of the fact that I might have been imagining that he was actually talking to me, he didn’t have a right to talk to me. Not right now. Not after today. Not with the way he’d smiled when he saw me watching them together. Not with how proud, and happy, he looked to be hand in hand with her when my heart was still breaking just that much more every day.
I stormed past. Kept walking.
“Anna!” he called after me, the tone in his voice hard to decipher.
I turned and looked at him, blinking hard at his bright and shiny gorgeousness. Wishing to see it dull, even if just a little bit.
“Don’t you have to take your girlfriend home? Don’t make her wait, Adam.”
“I did that already,” he answered, and it felt like a sharpened dagger right to my fucking ribcage.
I looked down at my phone. School ended nearly forty-five minutes ago. Where the hell did the time go?
“So why are you back here?”
“To talk to you.”
I was almost completely convinced I was hallucinating. Was he actually fucking serious? Like I needed him to personally rub his shitty relationship with that bimbo in my face.
“About what, Adam?”
“About Angelique and me...We -” he hesitated as if he hadn’t thought of the words he should use before he came to find me.
“We broke up forever ago, Adam. I don’t give a shit who you bang.”
He frowned, revealing that deep crinkle in his nose that I used to think was cute. Now, it was nothing short of menacing.
“Excuse me?”
“I don’t care who you sleep with. Who you fuck. Who you let fuck you. We broke up and you’re allowed to have a sex life. Angelique is hot. Word has it she has lots of experience and I’m sure she can’t wait to show you just how true the rumors are…or how spreadable herpes is.”
He grabbed me by the shoulders and stared down at me, his eyes piercing something deeper than my soul.
“You have some nerve! Here I am, trying to be fucking decent by giving you a heads-up-”
A heads-up? After prancing around the whole school with her in his arms? After sending the socials wild with pictures of them pressed tighter than a ham sandwich?
“Listen,” I cut him off. “You don’t owe me an explanation. I hope you and her work out better than you and I did.”
“You really don’t give a damn, do you?” There was a sharpness to his voice that stung, but it didn’t hide the part of him that sounded hurt. Like he’d wanted a bigger, more spectacular reaction. Too bad, I wasn’t going to give it to him.
Of course I gave a damn. But, that didn’t mean I had to be all pathetic and broken up about it to his face, did it?
“You’re a guy and she’s the kind of girl that guys like for more reasons than one. Though, it’s mainly just that one reason. The point is, you and her together, it makes sense.”
“That’s really how you see me?”
“It’s not an insult. Any heterosexual male would be excited by the idea of Angelique chasing them and she’s been chasing you for a while now.”
“That’s what you think?”
I tried to step past him, but his hand was on my shoulder again, scorching pain through every fiber of my being.
“Don’t be a bitch, Anna.”
“Fine. I’m happy for you Adam. Okay? Is that what you want to hear?”
Deep down, I hoped that Angelique’s face would melt off and that it would traumatize Adam so much that he would develop a phobia. Even more than that, I hoped he would tell me this was all just a sick ploy to make me jealous, but he can’t live with it and he wants me back. I hoped that he would say dating her has made him realize how good it was with me and that he still loved me. But, as I looked into his eyes all I saw was disappointment.
“I used to think that you knew me better than anybody else. I was so fucking wrong about you. How was I so wrong for so long?”
“I do know you, it’s you who didn’t know me.” Because if he did, he would have believed me.
“Well, I’m getting to know you now.”
Adam let me go and walked away. I stood and watched as he left the building and walked down the sidewalk. He looked deflated. Like our conversation had taken something out of him and his dazzling brilliance was just a little dimmer. I’d wounded him and I wasn’t sure how or why. All I knew was that we were both hurting today, and neither one of us could do anything about it.
Maybe that was a win, even if it felt nothing like one.
Chapter 12
Before the accident
I wasn’t lying when I told Adam that there was no way I was going to go to that stupid party. And yet, here I am. Except, I’m not looking to guzzle copious amounts of beer or shake my booty in front of the undeserving. I’m also not happy about being here.
“Have you seen Damon?”
The music is so loud that all messages have to be screamed directly into the ear canal of whomever you want to talk to. Unfortunately, that means pressing myself up against a dozen sweaty, drunk, cheap cologne soaked bodies before somebody points to the stairs at the end of the hall.
I’m grateful for the quick, non-verbal reply. If I am subjected to another whiff of cheap beer on stale breath I’m seriously going to wretch.
I make my way through the throng of people convulsing to the music and mount the stairs two at a time.
“Hey, Eva! When did you get here?”
I smile. Because, well…I always smile. It’s more of a habit than a response. I have no idea who this girl is, but she obviously knows me.
“I’ve been here a little while. Have you seen Damon?”
“Oh, yeah, I think he was looking for somebody a while ago. Did you check upstairs?”
The girl wobbles in her heels and blinks absently. She’s clutching one of those red cups that are made for nothing but excessive amounts of alcohol. The look in her eyes makes me know that this isn’t her first drink, mayb
e not even her second. There is little chance that I’ll get much useful information out of her. Still, checking upstairs doesn’t sound like the worst idea in the world.
“Thanks,” I say, and step past her.
“Sure, no problem. It was great talking to you.”
She smiles happily, and I suppress the urge to roll my eyes. Idiot.
I make it all the way up to the second floor without being stopped. More than a few of the people here are surprised to see me. These types of parties aren’t really my thing.
I’d heard it through the grapevine that David Young’s parents are away in Europe celebrating their anniversary and David, like any good delinquent, has decided to celebrate their love with a house party and underage drinking. A house party Damon shouldn’t be at. A house party I wouldn’t be at if Damon hadn’t fucking lied to me.
Somebody burps and I cringe. Too many idiots, too much alcohol. Someone will end up getting laid and regret it in the morning. Why people do this to themselves, I haven’t a clue.
It’s not that I look down on drinking. I think a nice bottle of wine is an essential part of any good meal. And the legal drinking age in the United States is ridiculous. At 18 I can vote, fight in a war, and drive a car, but I can’t walk into a bar and order a whiskey? Be that as it may, teens and alcohol without the threat of parental supervision is a recipe for disaster, and I don’t want to be anywhere near here when that disaster finally hit.
All I need to do is find Damon and get the hell out.
Damon is already in enough trouble after getting arrested for fighting a few months back. Luckily for him, all the charges were dropped. But really, the last thing he really wants is to get on my bad side. One call to the cops and his ass will be right back in lock-up.
Is he really this determined to be a badass? So determined to rebel? So determined to get the wrong kind of attention? It’s annoying, to say the least. And I don’t do very well with annoying.
The upstairs is at least a little better than the main floor. The music is muffled, though you could still feel it pounding through the floor. There are fewer people scattered throughout the hallways, and the stench of alcohol isn’t quite as pungent. I guessed this is where people escape to if they actually want a chance to socialize.
“Eva!” A chubby redhead in a purple dress steps out of a circle of kids leaning against a wall. “What are you doing here?”
Her wide eyes dart around nervously.
“I know, right? It’s not really my scene,” I say, smiling of course.
“No! I mean, I’ve never really seen you at a house party, except for the ones that you throw,” she says which is essentially what I had just insinuated. But whatever.
“Yeah, well, expanding my horizons. I figured I could take one night off to see what the hype is all about.”
“Yeah, that must be Damon rubbing off on you,” she laughs, and I cringe. Fucking cringe.
“Probably. By the way, have you seen him? I think he came up here, but I can’t find him.”
She looks panicked and my heart begins to pound. She had seen him. That much is a given. Hell, she probably knows exactly where he is, but whatever he’s up to, I’m not going to like it. No surprise there, since he shouldn’t have been here in the first damn place.
The girl looks up to the sky as if she’s asking god to help her to remember if she’s seen him. To be honest, she’s probably just weighing her options. Does she want to be a snitch, or feign ignorance?
One of the boys she’d been standing next to gets impatient with her bluffing and decides to step in.
“Just tell her where Damon is and get the hell over with it!”
“Shut up, Carlos,” she hisses and gives me a sympathetic look.
I don’t deal with sympathy well and whatever it is Damon is doing, he’s going to pay. For coming here. For lying to me. For making this little tramp pity me.
“Men are shit, you know that, right?”
“They have their moments.” I smile again but inside I can feel the dread mounting.
“He’s in there,” says Carlos.
“Jesus fucking Christ, Carlos. You couldn’t even wait two damn minutes!”
“She’s going to find out anyway. Just let her go and see for herself,” he argues.
“I was TRYING to let her down easy!”
The two of them begin quarreling with each other, forgetting that I’m even standing here as they bicker. Unable to contain myself any longer, I push past the redhead and head to the room Carlos had indicated.
I stand outside for a just a moment, take three deep breaths and remind myself that I am strong and beautiful and smart. I have nothing to be afraid of. Nothing at all. But I know better. Strong and beautiful and smart as I am, I also have a temper and I need very well to keep that temper down when I opened the door, no matter what is on the other side of it. The thought that he isn’t in there alone adds fuel to my anger and I try as best as I can to push it down. Maybe that isn’t the right thing to do. Thinking before acting makes sense.
I close my hand over the handle of the door and pull down. I half expect the door to be locked, maybe I even hope for it, but it isn’t. Of course it isn’t. Damon is notoriously forgetful and careless about details. Plus, this is perhaps the last place he would have ever expected me to show up.
They say you should never ask questions if you can’t handle the answers. I wanted to know where Damon was and why he’d come. I got my answer.
In the dim light of the room I can make out Damon’s strong back and shoulders, his head thrown back in ecstasy, and his narrow hips pistoling down between two shapely thighs.
Both bodies are slick with sweat and their clothes are crumpled in a corner on the floor. They’re so wrapped up with each other that neither of them notice me standing there, watching as the skank winds her arms around his neck. Watching as he pushes himself deeper and deeper inside her.
It feels like an eternity passes while I stand there and watch Damon bend at the waist and bury his face in the crook of her neck, hear her excited moans, and choke on a scream.
“Oh baby, I love you,” he pants.
It feels like a kick in the face. Love? Is he fucking serious?
In all of the months that we’ve been dating he’s never once called me baby. Never. And even worse, we haven’t even gotten remotely close to using the word love. That’s probably because he isn’t in love with me. I know that. I know I’m not his dream girl, but things like love take time. And men…men aren’t as quick to fall in love. So yeah, maybe Damon and I were missing something as a couple. Apparently he’d lost it between the creamy thighs of Angelique Monroe.
“Damon?”
I don’t even realize when the sound escapes my lips.
He stops mid-stroke and turns his head toward me. I’ll never forget the look on his face. Not shame or embarrassment, not even shock. He looks at me like I’m a pervert; a peeping Tom coming to intrude on his private moment.
He pulls the edge of the blanket up over Angelique’s body and smooths her hair out of her face before stepping away from her. He’s stark naked and unashamed. His cock is still hard and moist with her body’s juices.
It’s bad enough that he’s having sex with her, but he doesn’t even bother to use protection. He’s always reckless. It’s one of the things I liked about him, but this is beyond careless. He’s jeopardizing his whole future and for what?
Love. He loves her. He loves her and not me, that’s why.
“You caught me,” he says.
“Caught you?”
“Yeah, Eva. Walked in on me. Caught me. We’re done okay. I’m over all the bullshit with you.”
“How could you?” I snap.
Angelique sits up, pulling the blanket around her body like a toga. Even covered in sweat, with her hair ruined, she still seems composed.
When she parts her lips, I almost expect her to tell me that this is not what it looks like. Surely, she looks dumb enough
to resort to one of those shitty cliché lines. But instead, she shakes her head at me.
“I’m sorry you had to find out like this,” she says.
“Is this about sex, Damon? Is it because she was willing to spread her dirty little cunt for you and I wasn’t? Because you said that it didn’t matter. You said we could wait.” I can barely force myself to make sounds, but somehow, the words find their way out.
“It’s about you fucking lying to me, Eva. It’s about you feeding me some sad little story in order to control the fuck out of me.”
Now, I’m the one who’s caught off guard. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I say, even though I have a pretty damn good idea.
“Your grandmother,” he hisses. “How’s she feeling these days?”
I swallow hard, begging the anger to find somewhere else to sit.
“You know what, it doesn’t even matter. We weren’t a match, Eva. We’ve just been dragging this thing out for a while now. Me complying. You bossing me around wherever you can. I don’t know who your Mister Right is, but he sure as hell ain’t me.” He says it like somehow he was the one who found me with a cock buried in my creases. Like I was the one who had done something wrong.
“Then break up with me! Don’t cheat on me!”
He put his hands on his hips and nods. “I tried, Eva. Jesus, I fucking tried, but you…” He shakes his head and almost seems defeated, like he doesn’t have any fight left in him. “You knew we were on the rocks. You knew I wanted out. It’s exactly why you fed me that story about your grandmother. And the one about your parents. You know what kind of person that makes you?”
“Someone who fights for their relationship,” I tell him.
He shakes his head at me. “You’re right. I should have broken up with you properly. But we’re here now, and I think we can both stop pretending, okay.”
I take a step closer. Just one small step. Too close and I might do something I will regret. Too close and I might strangle the little bitch with my bare hands.
Filthy Pride: Dark Bully Romance Page 8