by M. Robinson
The arrogance.
The entitlement.
The downright disrespect for anyone who stood in their way. I detested every part of this underworld, especially the alpha mentality.
Kill or be killed.
It was such bullshit, and I wanted no part of it. I prayed for the day I could leave this life behind. Three more months. Ninety days and I was out of here. My plan was to leave on my eighteenth birthday. I’d leave the choice in my father’s hands if he would follow, but I couldn’t stay here for him any longer. This life was burying me alive. I wouldn’t be like my mother.
Mind over heart, no matter what.
Love makes you blind, and I could see right through the illusion. I didn’t believe in happily ever after’s or else my mother would still be alive. In our seedy world, love only got you murdered. I wasn’t naive enough to think otherwise.
“If this motherfucker would let you breathe then maybe I wouldn’t have to watch out for you.”
Giovanni snapped around and I gripped onto his arm, holding him back. “Do I look like I need your protection? I can take care of myself.”
“You’re just a woman in a man’s world, princesa.”
“I told you to stop calling me that.”
“I’m just trying to protect you, sweetheart.”
“Protect me from what? Men exactly like you?”
“You don’t know me.”
“I know enough to want nothing to do with you.”
“You heard her. Now leave, before I make you leave,” Giovanni ordered in a harsh tone I knew Cruz wouldn’t appreciate.
He wouldn’t stand down. They weren’t made that way.
“What makes you think you’re so different from every man I’ve ever known? You’re all cut from the same cloth. You’re not the first, nor will you be the last shameless bastard to walk into my home, wearing a designer tux, trying to fuck his way to my father’s table.”
“You think I have an ulterior motive?”
“I know you do.”
“How many times does she have to tell you she’s not interested?”
In three strides, Cruz was getting into Giovanni’s face.
The terrace suddenly seemed smaller with both of their tall, stocky, muscular builds looming over each other. Their bodies exuding dominance like two Pitbull’s fighting to be alpha. They might as well have pissed on me and called it a night.
“We’re not enemies.” Cruz threatened, “Don’t make us one.”
The tension escalated with each passing second. The way he was involving himself in my life infuriated me more than words could describe. I swallowed hard, my heart pounding against my chest to the point I swear they could hear it. Our world could turn bloody in two seconds flat, and I didn’t want these dickwads to ruin my custom designed dress.
“How about you both leave?”
“If I leave, you’re coming with me. You choose. We can do it my way or yours. Either way, I’m not leaving you alone with this son-of-a-bitch, who doesn’t know how to take no for an answer,” Cruz hissed.
“What?”
“You heard me.”
“I’m the last man you need to be protecting her from,” Giovanni stated, piquing my interest with both his ominous words and tone.
He added, speaking with execution, “There are far worse men in our world to be worrying about.”
Chapter 6
—Sienna—
“Does my father know this?” I asked him. “Since he’s the man you should be worrying about.”
Giovanni subconsciously gazed down at the ground, a telltale sign that my father didn’t have a clue about his perverted ways.
Pussy.
“There are cameras everywhere,” I informed. “I’d start running if I were you.”
The expression on Giovanni’s face as he backed away from us was one I’d seen many times.
Fear.
Never taking his troubled stare off mine, he nodded and left.
Once he was gone, I got right to the point with Cruz. I was done wasting my time on this cazzo. “If you’re looking for gratification, you’re not going to get it from me.”
“A simple thank you would suffice.”
“For what?”
“Showing you his true colors.”
“And what about yours? When are you going to show me those?”
“I have nothing to hide. What you see is what you get.”
“That makes sense. Since all I see is a wannabe mafioso who’s just waiting to prove himself to whatever hand will feed him. Let me give you a little advice, Cruz, don’t shit where you eat.”
“Do you kiss your father with that mouth?”
“Yeah.” I leaned in, close to his lips. “It’s the same mouth you want wrapped around your cock.”
He deviously grinned. “It pleases me to know you’re thinking about your mouth wrapped around my cock.”
“Ugh! You’re vile.”
“So is your friend.”
“He’s not my friend.”
“Looked that way to me.”
“Well, looks can be deceiving.”
“Your looks are anything but deceiving.” He brushed a loose strand of my hair away from my face. “You’re gorgeous.” His intense green eyes narrowed in on me, while he swept his thumb against my cheek.
His desperate antics didn’t faze me. I was used to this over the top production from men trying to charm their way into a seat at my father’s table. This wasn’t about me, it never was. I was simply a means to an end. Besides, men like him didn’t know how to love. They sold their souls to La Famiglia. At the end of the day it was the only thing that mattered, and their so-called women were fools to think any different.
I refused to be anyone’s second place.
Ever.
I wasn’t a trophy to be showcased on any man’s arm. To turn the blind eye to the crooked lifestyle I grew up in.
The countless infidelity, the disrespect, the know your place and only speak when spoken to.
Fuck that.
I was no one’s property.
These men were animals, and the only code they lived and breathed by was mafia life. I learned that the hard way.
“I meant what I said,” I reminded in a stern voice, meaning business. “I stay away from mafiosos.”
“What makes you think I’m a gangster?”
“Are you serious? Are you really going to insult my intelligence? I could see you from a mile away.”
“So you were looking at me.”
“Don’t twist my words.” I shook my head. “You look exactly like your father. For a second, I thought it was him.”
“And how did that make you feel? The idea of seeing my father.” His thumb hadn’t stopped grazing my cheek.
“Your father is of no concern to me. In three months, I won’t ever have to see him again. Any of you.”
“What happens in three months?”
I jerked away, done with this conversation. “None of your business.”
“Princesa—”
“I said don’t call me that.”
“You’re right.” He nodded. “Sin describes you better.”
“Excuse me?”
“Your stunning beauty, your feisty attitude, that fucking mouth… it’s worth any sin that may come of it.”
“I don’t—”
“Go out with me.”
“Is that a request or a demand? Because I don’t answer to either. I won’t tell you again.” I backed away this time and spoke with conviction, “Stay away from me, Cruz.”
—Cruz—
She snapped around and started walking back inside.
“This is far from over, Sin.”
Without turning, she lifted up her middle finger and kept walking, flipping me off. I couldn’t help but laugh. This was the first girl to ever hold my attention for anything other than sex.
I liked her.
A lot.
It was such an unfamiliar emotion for me.
To feel something for someone that wasn’t my family.
“Fuck, my sister.”
I quickly gazed down at my watch, realizing I’d spent more time with Sienna than I intended.
“Shit.”
Just like that, an unsettling but disturbing feeling seeped into the core of my being. Before I knew what was happening, my body turned, moving on its own accord. I hauled ass toward the banquet room, where I left Adriana. Rushing down a long, narrow hallway, passing several other rooms, I noticed how far I’d truly gone.
All I could hear were the sounds of my footsteps, echoing off the walls. My shoes pounded into the marble floor, one right after the other. I couldn’t get to the banquet room fast enough. My heart was beating out of my chest, the pulse in my neck profusely pounding against my skin, while sweat pooled at my temples.
In a matter of seconds, my eyes shifted every which way when I entered the massive space, looking for Ari. Inspecting every inch of the scene unfolding in front of me. It was like I wanted to engrain this moment of panic into my memory.
Words couldn’t describe what I felt. The sentiments that surged through my bloodstream. I forced myself to keep my shit together, as I looked for her among the throngs of people.
Hearing my father’s words, “Protect your sister.” Over and over again.
Every bone in my body was still.
Every muscle in my core clenched.
Every single part of me was unable to move.
The guards were nowhere to be found. Neither was…
My sister.
Taking one last look around the room, I called her, and it went straight to voicemail.
“This is Adriana, you know what to do!”
I sprinted down another hallway. Darting through the estate, needing to find her, feeling as though my life depended on it.
It did.
Music blared loudly through the speakers as everyone mingled and carried on without a care in the world. My blood raged, blinded by craze and madness looking for her but coming up empty.
Until finally, I shouted, “Ari! Ari, where are you?”
There was no controlling the inner turmoil or the wave of thoughts, soaring through my mind, and taking over every last inch of me. For a man who prided himself on control, I had absolutely none at the moment. Only proving it with each heavily passing second.
With each ragged, deep breath.
With every blink of my panic-ridden eyes, I was still unable to find her.
Not one logical thought was able to form in my head. I could only feel the terror flowing through every bone in my body. My patience was stretched thin, dangling by a thread. That thread fucking snapped, when I spotted one of our guards out of the corner of my eye. His demeanor mirrored mine.
“Fuck,” I breathed out, expecting the worst.
He was about to be on the receiving end of my fucking fury. I dashed through the crowd of people, not giving a shit who I knocked into, and was in his face in two seconds flat.
Gripping onto the lapels of his suit jacket, I seethed, “Where is she?”
His eyes told me everything I wanted to know, but I still needed to hear him say the words. Like it wasn’t true, this wasn’t my reality, until I heard him say it.
“Where the fuck is Ari? Where’s my sister?”
He shook his head back and forth as if he couldn’t bring himself to tell me where she was, or what happened to her.
“I’m…I’m…I’m…”
“I’m going to fucking kill you if you don’t answer me!” I clung onto his lapels tighter and more demanding. My knuckles turning white from the pressure of my grip. “Where is Adriana?” I screamed in his face.
It was the first time in my life I had seen true horror wash over someone’s features.
“Answer me!” I forcefully shook him, trying to get him to speak. “Where the fuck is my sister?!”
“We…we…”
Without wavering, I let him go and in one swift movement I pulled out my father’s gun from the back of my slacks, aiming it right at his forehead. Not giving a flying fuck people were witnessing my weakness.
“Where. Is. Adriana?”
His eyes widened, stuttering out, “I’m…I’m…sorry, Cruz…I don’t know what happened. One minute she was there…and then the next…she was gone.”
“Gone! What the fuck does that mean? Where the fuck did she go?”
He shrugged. His body shook with each word that escaped his mouth, “We’ve searched this entire estate, Cruz…we can’t find her…but we did find her cellphone on the ground outside of the property…”
I stumbled back from the impact of his statement. The wind was knocked out of my lungs and the fight in me was gone. Pure agony ripped through my mind, as I ran my hands through my hair, wanting to tear it out. Only triggering memories of our childhood. I struggled to maintain my composure. My resolve shattered around us like shards of glass slicing out of my skin.
I failed to protect her.
I was supposed to protect her at all costs.
It wasn’t until he informed me, “I’m sorry, Cruz. She’s been taken.”
That I felt like I died.
And the Devil inside of me…
Was born.
Chapter 7
—Cruz—
I once read that our minds are our most powerful tools, capable of just about anything. Especially when it involved trauma. The truth hid within itself.
What did you do, Cruz? What did you fucking do?
My eyes closed on their own, as I slid down what felt like a wall. Slowly, crumbling to the cold, hard ground beneath me.
I couldn’t move.
I couldn’t breathe.
I couldn’t utter a sound.
Not one word.
All I could do was feel…
I was there, but I wasn’t. Time stood still while the whole world continued on without me. I willingly surrendered, allowing one of the last memories I had of my sister to play out in front of me. As if it was happening right then and there.
“Cruz,” Adriana exclaimed. “Must you always babysit me everywhere we go?”
“It’s my job to protect you.”
“Then whose job is it to protect you?”
“I don’t need any protection.”
“That’s where you’re wrong, brother. You need protecting more than anyone else. The devil doesn’t come to you as a demon. The fiend presents itself to you as everything you ever wanted. So tell me, Cruz? What is it you want?”
“For you to be safe.”
“Interesting.” She smiled in that carefree, jaded sort of way I had grown accustomed to. “Considering that’s all I’ve ever wanted for you.”
“Ari, how many times do I have to tell you, I’ll protect you with my last breath if I have to.”
“Yeah, I know. Trust me, it’s my worst nightmare. You dying to save me.”
“Ari—”
“Don’t, Cruz. Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”
“I don’t know what you want me to say. There is no right or wrong answer.”
“I know in my heart that’s not true. I want freedom. It’s not fair that I’m almost twenty-three-years-old and I’ve never been in love. I want what our parents have. Don’t you?”
“I’ve never given it any thought.”
“That makes me sad for you. You know the life we’ve led isn’t normal, Cruz. We’ve known it all our lives. We just pretend like our father isn’t a man most people fear. I know the truth, and it’s not that he was… is… El Diablo. It’s that you want to be just like him.”
“And why is that so bad, Adriana?”
“Because you’ll lose yourself in the process, and I can’t stand by and not do something about it.”
“Is that a threat, Ari?”
“No.” She shook her head and peered deep into my eyes. “It’s a promise.”
I shook my head, silently praying this was just another nightmare I’d soon wake up from.
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One step.
Five steps.
Fifteen steps.
Twenty.
Was I walking?
Was I running?
Where was I going?
I blinked, and I was suddenly walking down a hallway, hearing faint voices in the distance. Failing miserably at maintaining a steady pace.
Cloudy.
Disoriented.
Confused as fuck.
One foot in front of the other, I swayed back and forth. Nothing calmed my nerves. The anxiety for what was to come, lived and breathed in my blood. It pumped in my veins, producing a deafening vibration throughout my body.
I couldn’t tell what was real, or what was fake. It all blended together, forming more facts, more deceits, more goddamn demons I didn’t know I had.
“I’m not here to ask you what to do. I’m here to tell you what needs to be done. I want all video surveillance from here to a thirty-mile radius. Now.”
Was that my father?
“You heard him,” another familiar voice demanded. “Go! Now!”
Was that Sienna’s father?
A handful of guards rushed out of the room I was a few feet away from. My confusion spiraled with each passing second, feeling as though I was walking through a dream within a dream. Desperately trying to navigate my footing through the dark space and voices surrounding me.
The closer I got, the louder they became.
“Show me the footage from the ballroom. I want to see my son. Where is Crucifixio?”
The weight of my name on his tongue sounded like a judge slamming his gavel, sentencing me to life in an unbearable hell. Reality slammed into me at full force, knocking all the truth into me, and making me dizzy but lucid all at once.
What did I do? What the fuck did I do?
My heart began beating its way up to my throat until there were no more steps to take, no more lies to believe, no more illusions to consume me. There was no escaping what I’d done.
As soon as I walked into what appeared to be Luciano’s office, I came face-to-face with the consequences of my actions. There would be no coming back from this, and I knew that from the second I stood behind my father. Who was closely scrutinizing the security surveillance in front of him.