Clockwise

by Lee Strauss

I SAT WITH MY MOM on the sofa and stared at the walls. Mom had just finished painting them. “Looks good,” I said.

  “Thanks. There’s something about a fresh coat of paint that just makes me, well, it sounds silly, but it makes me feel hopeful. The same way spring does, when the new leaves sprout.”

  “I don’t think it’s silly, Mom. I think it’s cool.”

  We didn’t talk much other than that. I didn’t feel up to fluffy conversation, and I didn’t think Mom did either. During one of the many cosmetic commercials we consumed in between news broadcasts, I made a decision. I was going to look good when Nate “non” broke up with me. He may feel this was something he had to do, but that didn’t mean I had to make it easy for him. I headed upstairs.

  My biggest task, as usual, was my hair. I added a fruity smelling hair product, combing it through with my fingers until every last rebellious strand had surrendered. It had a tint of sparkle in the shine, kind of like lip gloss, but for hair. It was down to my shoulder blades now, and I easily swept it up with a clip, letting a few loose ringlets frame my face. Next was a bit of make-up, not too much, just enough to look fresh and appealing, and then I changed into my favorite jean shorts and a cotton button down shirt, taking it easy with my arm. I slipped into a pair of flat leather sandals and viewed my image in the mirror. Not bad. Even my knees didn’t seem that knobby anymore. In fact, everything was looking softer and rounder. In a good way. Eat your heart out, Nate.

  The doorbell rang. I sprinted down the steps, wanting to beat my mother to the door, but too late. I could hear his voice, “Is Casey home?”

  “Casey!” Mom shouted, practically in my ear.

  “Ow, I’m right here, Mom.”

  “Oh sorry. Didn’t hear you. Nate’s here.” She said this with her back half turned to Nate, giving me a questioning eyebrow. Mom invited him in.

  “It’s so nice to see you again, Nate.”

  “It’s good to see you, too.” He shoved his fists in his pockets and rocked on his shoes. It amused me. Meeting my mother made him nervous.

  “There’s a park a block away,” I said, giving my mother the eye.

  “You kids go on.” She got the hint. “Have fun.”

  We started walking and I braced myself for his speech. Mental review: he didn’t mean to hurt me, he just couldn’t be my friend anymore. I pinched my eyes and waited.

  “So tell me about it,” Nate said.

  “About what?” Maybe the speech was coming later. Of course, he needed to satisfy his curiosity first.

  “About what it was like to go back to nineteen sixty-one.”

  Nate already possessed more of me than any other person I knew. I was so not about to give him any more. “It was okay. I told you everything at the hospital.”

  “Well, did anything happen?”

  “What are you getting at?”

  “No offense, but I’ve never seen you stay out of trouble, Casey.”

  I shrugged. He stopped and pulled me towards him. “Why don’t you want to tell me?”

  His hands firmly held my shoulders. Right on the sidewalk. In front of the neighbors and everything. The way he stared at me was so intense.

  I couldn’t breathe.

  “You’re hedging. What happened that you don’t want to tell me?”

  “Why should I tell you?” I swallowed hard. “Just say what you came to say, Nate. Let’s get this over with.”

  He let his arms drop. “What are you talking about?”

  Stupid me. My eyes prickled and I could tell my face was turning that unflattering shade of blotchy red. I stared at the sidewalk.

  “Just tell me, you’ve had enough. Friendship with me is so much more than you bargained for, and you want to get on with your life. A normal life that doesn’t include me. I understand. Just say it and go.”

  I felt his finger under my chin, sending electric shivers down my spine. He lifted my face, forcing me to look into his eyes.

  “You got it all wrong,” he whispered. “It drives me crazy that I might not be there next time you’re in trouble. With all the Robert Willingsworths in the world, Casey, I want to be there with you, to protect you and to love you. Here and there.”

  Then he leaned down and kissed me. Kissed me! Hey, did he just say he loved me? My good arm reached up and grabbed his hair. He kissed me again, sweet, warm, soft kisses, and then touched my nose with his.

  “Is this okay?”

  “Yes!” He kissed me again. Every sensory in my body screamed excitedly. Nate Mackenzie liked me, maybe even loved me.

  When he pulled away, he said, “I’ll be honest with you. I’ve agonized over this for weeks. It's why I kept distancing myself from you. It’s true that life would be a whole lot simpler for me without you, Casey. But it would also be a whole lot emptier and quite a bit duller.

  In the end I decided it didn’t matter.”

  “But, I saw you with Jessica.”

  “What?”

  “In the hall. It looked like you two were back together.”

  Nate shook his head. “I was just being gentlemanly.” My cheeks tugged up in a grin as I remembered Sara Watson.

  At the park, we settled on a bench and I snuggled close, completely happy. How differently this day had turned out.

  “When did you realize that, well…” I didn’t know how to say it. “That you liked me?”

  Nate chuckled. “Ever since the first time we went back together and you showed me up with your expert hunting skills. You’re a likable person.”

  I loved how his eyes sparkled when he smiled. “But, I realized it was more than that for me, that I was crazy over you when, well, when Willingsworth proposed. I was completely insane with jealousy. I tried to beat it down, but I couldn’t win.”

  I laughed. “So, that’s why you kept blowing hot and cold.”

  “Hey, go easy on me. It’s not your usual love triangle.”

  He draped his arm around my shoulders. “So, back to the sixties?” he nudged. Though I really didn’t want to, I told him about the run in with Jerome. Nate clenched his jaw and tightened his grip on my shoulder when I explained how I got away by stomping on Jerome’s sneaker. I moved on to lighter things.

  “Samuel has a pretty big family, three sisters and a brother.” I told Nate their names and ages.

  “Right, you’d mentioned Rosa.”

  “She was having a baby in the living room right when Samuel and I looped back to the Watsons’. I don’t know what she had or if the baby was okay. I only know she wasn’t going to keep it. They were too poor. All the kids had to work to support the family because their dad was murdered.”

  “That’s harsh.”

  I agreed. “I really felt bad for her.”

  The sun had slid behind the horizon. “It’s getting late,” I said. “I have to get home.”

  Nate walked me back to my house and up the steps to the front door. Then he kissed me again. It wasn’t a kiss good-bye. It was a see-you-tomorrow-and-everyday-after-that kind of kiss.

  Nate was with me. Nate was mine. Nate Mackenzie and Casey Donovan. I liked the sound of that.

  I couldn’t wait to call Lucinda!

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR