Plenty Proud
Page 12
Eagle Eye swept her up and slung her over his shoulder as he headed towards the shelter of the cave. When he reached it, he lowered her onto the dry floor. He looked around to see if there was any dry debris inside the cave that he could burn, while he peeled his wet buckskin shirt off his backs and removed his leggings, and moccasins, leaving only his breechcloth on.
Mackenzie sat shivering as she watched Eagle Eye find twigs and leaves that had blown inside the cave, starting them on fire, using his flint and knife that were attached to his belt. Once he got the blaze going, he turned to her.
“Remove your wet dress,” he advised. “We can lay our clothes on this rock by the fire to dry, but if you leave your dress on, you will never get warm.”
He pulled Mackenzie to her feet, helping her remove her wet dress that resisted as the wet leather clung to her skin. Then he laid it on the rock, and brought Mackenzie to the fire, wrapping his arms around her to warm her chilled body, until the fire could dry them both. She sat in front of him, his legs bent on either side of her, as she leaned her back against his strong chest, and he wrapped his arms around her, hugging her up to him.
Eagle Eye liked the feel of her soft body against his. He wanted to shelter her, only now he was worried. He didn’t know how far downriver the canoe would be taken, or if any of its contents would survive. They had no food, and the only weapon he had with him was his knife. He would have to make a new bow and fashion arrows. He didn’t know where he would find feather or glue for that task, even though he felt he could find everything else he would need for the project. He was now responsible for this woman, and he had no way to take her down the river now. If they walked, it would take four times longer to get to her home. He knew he could survive the hardship, but he wondered if she could.
He tried to put it all out of his mind, as he clasped Mackenzie tighter and rocked her back and forth, with his chin resting on her head. He could feel her shivering against him, and though he kept throwing twigs on the fire from the pile he had collected, once they were gone, there would be nothing to burn.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
Mackenzie turned and looked up at him. “It is not your fault,” she said, trying to smile. “We have no control over the weather.”
“I should have brought us to shore sooner,” he insisted.
“Only we wouldn’t have had a place to take shelter. At least we are safe,” she pointed out.
“You are not upset?” he asked.
“I was buried in snow and almost died. This is nothing,” Mackenzie told him.
“Like I said before, you are strong and brave.” He bent his head and kissed her forehead. “I can see why Plenty Proud loves you and wishes you to be his wife.”
“It is too late for that now. Even if we went back to your village, I have already told Little Bird that Plenty Proud should take her as his wife. I cannot go back on my word. Besides she was supposed to be his first choice. I have no other alternative but to continue on to Missouri. Do you think we can find the canoe when the storm is over?”
“I don’t know,” he murmured, turning her in his arms and holding her against him so she could rest her head on his shoulder.
“I guess we will just have to wait and see,” she murmured, rubbing her cheek against his smooth skin.
“If we can’t find the canoe, and all our possessions are lost, it would be difficult to walk that far,” he told her. “What will you do if we don’t find the canoe?”
“Do you think you could make another one?”
“It would take time. I don’t have tools to make one.”
“Should we try to return to the village?”
“Let’s wait and see what happens after the storm stops. We will continue along the shore, downriver, and if we don’t find the canoe in a few days, we will decide then what to do.”
Eagle Eye threw some more sticks on the fire, and then began to stroke Mackenzie’s hair to help dry it.
Mackenzie liked the feel of his fingers, running through her hair. She thought of when Plenty Proud had stroked her hair to comfort her. Eagle Eye was much like his friend, she thought. No wonder they liked each other. She realized she liked him too.
Eventually, there was nothing left to burn. Eagle Eye lowered down onto his back and pulled Mackenzie on top of him, sheltering her in his arms as he allowed her to use him to rest on. He smoothed his large hands over her back, to try to keep her warm.
Mackenzie felt unsure of herself. She was still chilled, and she liked the way Eagle Eye’s hands were warming her skin. The more he moved them over her, the warmer she became as her heart started to quicken at his touch, remembering how Plenty Proud’s hands had felt on her. Only he was not Plenty Proud. She didn’t think there was anyone who could take Plenty Proud’s place. However, the movement of Eagle Eye’s hands caused a tremor to travel through her.
“Are you still cold?” she herd him murmur when he felt her shivering.
“A little,” she told him, not wanting his hands to stop warming her.
“You feel soft,” he told her.
“Your hands feel good,” she replied.
“I only wish to keep you warm,” he reminded himself more than her.
“I think it is working,” she murmured.
“I do not wish to upset you,” he said hesitantly.
“You’re not,” she assured him.
She felt his hands deepening their caresses, moving down over her legs and back up again.
“Plenty Proud told me he took you,” Eagle Eye admitted. “That is why he needed the vision quest. He said he could not be happy without you in his arms. He worried that he might give you a child, and you would still leave him.”
“He is probably right. It is better this way.”
“If he knew my hands were touching you, I believe he would kill me. I feel like I am betraying him.”
“It doesn’t matter. I am not going back to him, and you are merely trying to keep me warm. He doesn’t have to know.”
“I believe it is warming me more than it should,” he whispered. “It makes me want to touch more of you.”
“Shh, don’t talk. It will only make both of us feel bad,” she whimpered.
Eagle Eye buried his face in her hair, his hands delighting in the feel of her skin beneath them. He did not want to betray Plenty Proud, only she had not agreed to become Plenty Proud’s wife, so his friend really had no claim on her, he thought. However, he knew she would never let him claim her either. Besides she was going home, never to lay eyes on Plenty Proud or him again. He wondered why the thought saddened him. He had been anxious to get the girl away so his friend could go back to his normal life again, take Little Bird as his wife, and become a great warrior and hunter, making his tribe proud of him. Apparently this little slip of a fire headed girl held some kind of magic over both of them. He wasn’t sure he could resist it.
The more his hands touched her, the more his hands wished to continue to touch her. She was not resisting his touch and he only had so much self-restraint. Slowly, he tested her response to each touch as he smoothed his hand down over her leg, then up over her back, and coming to rest on her bottom. He paused, letting his hand savor the feel of her soft, round rump, then moving his fingers over it, caressing her gently as his fingers dared to seek beyond that point, moving towards her leg again, stopping short, as he began to massage her inner thigh.
Eagle Eye threw caution to the wind, letting his fingers glide until he found her, touched her, savored the warmth against his hand, and then hungered for more warmth. He heard her murmur, and he wasn’t sure if it was a whimper for him to stop, or a sigh for him to continue. He decided to test the latter, rewarding his undeniable thirst for her. He realized he did not wish to honor the fact that this was the woman that Plenty Proud loved. He was afraid that he was falling in love with her himself, as hopeless as it was, since he knew she would have neither of them in her life, longer than this time spent so fleetingly together
.
Only if that was the case… he did not want to analyze it. He did not want to look into the future and wonder what his actions might bring. He merely wanted to drown in the feel of her, giving into the part of him that longed for this at the moment.
If the moment was to be fleeting, he wanted to take advantage of his good fortune. She was vulnerable now, and she trusted him. He imagined, she even wanted him, the same way he suddenly wanted her. He would test that assumption out as well, he thought, deepening his caresses.
If she had been with Plenty Proud, it meant she was not innocent to his advancing caresses. She could stop him any time she pleased. If she did, he would stop, but until that point... his mind started imagining it, and his excitement grew.
Eagle Eye turned her onto her back. It was dark in the cave, and he couldn’t’ see her, now that the fire had gone out, so he let his fingers tell him what his eyes could not feast upon. Her skin was now warm, from laying on him, and he let his fingers dance upon her skin, touching her delicately, to bring shivers to the surface, and then warming her skin with his mouth, drinking against her, getting lost in the taste of her, wanting more than just the taste of her.
Mackenzie had been comforted by Eagle Eye’s hands warming her. She knew it probably wasn’t the wisest thing to do, but she had little choice. She was cold and he was making her so much warmer. The more he warmed her, the more she desired the kind of warmth he was offering her. She had already lost Plenty Proud, and soon she would lose this young brave as well. She thought of the lonely life she had facing her future. She doubted if she would ever be able to have a man touch her like this, once Eagle Eye left her. She was already a fallen woman, she justified. Besides, she was lonely. She had discovered what it was like to have a man touching her like this, and if she closed her eyes, she could pretend it was Plenty Proud, she thought, talking herself into it.
When he turned her onto her back, she knew what he wanted. When he touched her with his fingers, and then his mouth, shooting sparks throughout her body, she realized she wanted it too. She would let him, she decided. She wanted to feel love, and he seemed to want to show her love. No one would ever know, and even if they did, it didn’t make any difference. Once she reached Missouri, she would put all of it behind her.
Now she stopped thinking about it, because she was starting to get lost in the very feel of Eagle Eye’s caresses, and kisses cascading over her body. She let her inhibitions fade, as her body responded to the touch of Eagle Eyes lips, causing her to surrender to him.
Eagle Eye, released his breath, blowing softly on Mackenzie’s skin, when he discovered her willingness to allow him this pleasure. Her shiver in response to his breath upon her thrilled him in a way that caused him to ache inside for her. He nuzzled his face against her, finding the taste of her caused his senses to reel even more, with the desire of her. He would take his time. They had forever. No telling how long the storm would last. He may have to repeatedly find ways of warming her even more. He liked the thought, deepening the caress he was in the midst of, seeking out a whimper in whichever way he could. He was rewarded, and continued his caress, ever attuned to the slightest move Mackenzie made in response, which would encourage him to seek to satisfy her further, in whichever way she desired the most.
Mackenzie was feeling completely warmed, both from without and within, as her heart pumped blood at an amazing speed with every touch Eagle Eye planted on her skin. She thought of how Plenty Proud had touched her in a similar manner and the reward it gave her. Now Eagle Eye was working towards that same reward and her body was eagerly racing to meet his attempt. When the splendor overtook her, Eagle Eye chuckled softly in his low voice, and then proceeded to pull more pleasure from her, until she was eager for him in the same way he was eager for her.
His breechcloth had already fallen away, prepared for the moment he had been working towards. Now even if she did ask him to stop, he didn’t think he would be able to, only she didn’t refuse him, and the very submission lifted his heart. She may love Plenty Proud, but she was allowing him to love her at this moment, and it seemed to be the only thing he was living for. Later, he could feel guilty, but for now, he was overjoyed.
As the two lay recuperating, and both feeling warmed and content, Eagle Eye attempted to kiss Mackenzie’s lips for the first time. He wasn’t sure she would allow him to kiss her, if she had merely allowed him this out of her own physical desire. He didn’t even know if it had meant anything to her. After all, she was leaving both Plenty Proud and him behind, once she reached her home. When she placed her arms around his neck and returned the kiss, he gave a sigh of relief.
“Do you love me any?” he asked her, when the kiss ended.
“I don’t know. I am fond of you, but I can’t love either you or Plenty Proud too much, or it will just break my heart once I reach Missouri.”
“Why did you allow me to do this?” he breathed, nuzzling his face in her neck.
“Well, at first it was making me warm, and then it seemed that I wanted it. Plenty Proud was the first man I ever coupled with. Griz touched me all the time, and I couldn’t stop him, but when Plenty Proud and you touched me, it was different. It made me feel whole in a way I can’t explain. I know it is wrong. I have betrayed whatever love Plenty Proud has for me and me for him. I have ruined all my chances of a happy marriage in the future to one of my own people, but I feel so hopeless because I know I can’t stay at your village, or be with either of you. Now, if I tried to return, you would end up fighting over me. So I can never go back. Then I would have to choose between you, and I can’t do that.
“Yet Plenty Proud has Little Bird. I have no one. You could choose me.”
“You said yourself that if anyone discovered me in your village, they would force me to leave. It wouldn’t be fair. Besides, seeing Plenty Proud with Little Bird would only make me sad. Even if I had your love, I love Plenty Proud more. He told me that when I left he would be like the maiden in the myth, where she claimed to be a widow after her lover left her and turned into a fish. He may not take anyone for his wife. If he saw me with you, even if he did take Little Bird for his wife, he would never forgive either of us. And if he didn’t take Little Bird as his wife, you could not have me after all.”
Eagle Eye knew she was right. Neither he nor Plenty Proud could have their heart’s desire. And even if one of them could, it would end up destroying his and Plenty Proud’s friendship forever. It was better he didn’t hold out any hope. Still he clutched her to him. Until she was gone for good, he could not imagine not having her like this again.
CHAPTER EIGHT
The warm sun filtered its way through the opening of the cave, but it didn’t warm it any. Their clothes had dried overnight, yet Eagle Eye wished it was still raining outside. He didn’t want the nearness of Firelight to fade. He wanted to hold her in his arms even longer. He realized that was not possible. She was not his woman, or intended wife. She was just a slip of a girl, confused and lost without anyone to care for her…except for him, now that Plenty Proud was no long available.
He pushed her unruly hair out of her eyes, and smiled down at her as her green eyes fluttered open. “The storm is over,” he told her, but he realized the storm in his heart was just beginning to rage.
This had been Plenty Proud’s woman, and he had taken advantage of her. He knew he would feel guilty in the end, even a little ashamed. Now he would have to deal with those conflicting emotions. However, there was nothing he could do about it now. Life would go on, and they had to move forward.
“We need to get dressed and see if we can find the canoe,” he told her.
“Yes,” Mackenzie agreed.
He noticed that she could not look him in the eyes, and figured she was feeling guilty as well. Therefore, he gave her the space he felt she needed, and tied on his breechcloth, then went and finished putting the rest of his clothes on, handing her dress to her.
Everything looked washed and clean as he stood
gazing out at the river and the land around them. It was time to turn over a new leaf. As much as his heart yearned for her, he vowed not to touch the girl again the way he had last night. It would only be harder to let her go, if he did. He had one purpose, he told himself, and that was to take her home, and then return to his village to face Plenty Proud’s anger.
Mackenzie came and stood beside him, looking out from the cave entrance. The river was calm now, as though nothing had disturbed it overnight. The sun glistened on its surface, looking brighter than it had the day before. Everything appeared bright, only Mackenzie knew her heart would never feel bright again. She had given herself to two different Sioux braves. Worst yet, they were friends. Now she had not only come between Little Bird and Plenty Proud, but had come between Eagle Eye and Plenty Proud too. She had put her happiness first, not weighing the consequences or even seeming to care how much she was disrupting people’s lives.
She thought of how Griz had treated her. She had yearned to escape his selfish use of her. She had longed for the familiarity of home, yet in the back of her mind, she knew nothing would be the same again. If her brother and father had not returned to Missouri, there would be no one to greet her or to share her home with. Once she had escaped Griz’s heavy hand, she craved love and acceptance. Plenty Proud had given her that, and now Eagle Eye was attempting the same thing. Only there was no way to love either of them. She and they lived in two different worlds.
“I suppose we should get going,” she said, not even glancing at Eagle Eye. She knew if their glance caught, it would weaken her again. She started to the shore ahead of him. “Look,” she said as she bounded forward, “my sack washed ashore!”
Eagle Eye came up beside her as she lifted the damp sack from the ground. “It means the canoe must have turned over,” he frowned. “We may have lost everything inside.”