by Laura Acton
Observing Bram shift on the barstool, appearing a bit uncomfortable, Nick picked up the earlier thread of conversation. “Fourth round is on Bram. By the way, how’s your backside doing?”
Puzzled Dan looked at Bram. “What?”
Loki realized Dan had been too focused on the subjects to see what happened to Bram. He laughed. “Oh man, you missed it. Six mad geese chased Bram, and he ran like he was on fire with the geese nipping and squawking at him the whole way. I wish I could’ve gotten a picture.”
Dan smiled as Bram laughed. Then Loki, Lexa, Ray, and Jon all started repeating their earlier jokes for Dan’s benefit and teasing Bram again.
When the joking died down, Jon pulled out a small cardboard box. “Bram, we all agreed that this should go to you tonight.”
“What is it?” Bram peered at the white box.
Ray explained, “The Pond gave out ornaments today. When we arrived, they only had one left. We think you should have this.”
“Why me?” Bram took the small box from Jon.
“Open and find out,” Loki said in a giddy voice.
Dan glanced at Lexa with a questioning look. She only smiled and shifted her gaze to Bram.
Bram opened the box and removed a silver-toned ornament of six fat geese sitting on nests. Engraved at the bottom was Merry Christmas from your friends at Gus’ Pond. Bram burst out laughing.
Loki and Lexa began to sing, “On the sixth day of Christmas, Alpha Team gave to me, six geese attacking, five onion rings, four falling birds, three mother hens, two lovey-dovies, and a frozen sniper in a pear tree.”
The team hung out for another hour sipping sodas, tea, and coffee, before going home since they had shift again tomorrow.
Outside Dan’s Apartment – 9:30 p.m.
Bram pulled to a stop at the entrance of Dan’s place. “I’ll be here by four thirty if that’s okay.”
Dan nodded. “Yeah, fine. Thanks again for the ride. The weather is a little rough to be riding in tonight.”
Bram fingered the ornament box. On the drive over, he had been thinking about earlier today and Dan’s Christmas tree decorations. He held the paper box out to Dan. “I want you to have this.”
Dan glanced down and chuckled. “The team agreed this was for you. You were the one attacked by geese today.”
“Yeah, true. But since it is mine, I’m giving it to you.”
“Why?”
“Well, you have ornaments for the first five days of the song. I think you need a complete set. You can look at it and think of me and perhaps it will be a good memory of today.”
Dan reached out, accepting the goose ornament. “Thanks, Bram. I will.”
Bram smiled. “Call me tonight if you want to talk. Like always, I’m here for you no matter the time.”
Nodding, Dan said, “I’ll be ready at four thirty. Night.” He stepped out into the bitterly cold night and grabbed his go bag from the rear seat. He closed the door and hustled into the apartment entrance. He turned to see Bram waited until he was in the building before he drove off. Dan smile all over again. Bram is my third dad.
Not typically one for the elevator, he was exhausted and didn’t relish a ten-flight climb. Approaching the doors, Dan noticed a sign taped to them—out of order again. He sighed and turned for the stairwell. This apartment complex could sure use some renovations. That made him think of Lexa, and he grinned broadly. She sure knew how to renovate things. His heart was one of them. Waking with her today and her indicating she wanted to spend more time with him filled him with hope for a future with Lexa.
Dan’s Apartment – 10:00 p.m.
Dan gazed at his tree after he hung the geese ornament. It was filling out nicely. He rubbed his chest and went to the kitchen sink to get water so he could take two of the pills Jim gave him.
After downing them, he headed to his window and stared out. The city was lit up with many more lights this time of year. It was bright and shiny, but the lights here were no comparison to the millions of stars that he stared up at for six years. Dan wished he could see the inky black sky filled with twinkling stars, but the harsh man-made lights washed them all away.
He turned and headed for bed. In the darkness of his room, he said, “Brody, I still miss you, buddy. I think you would be happy for me. This year I’m blessed not only with our brothers, but my team, and my family too. You were so right about my mom. I wish I had listened to you long ago. I can’t wait to see her face on Christmas morning.”
Shifting closer to sleep an image of Sara entered his mind. “Hey, Sara, remember the yellow bike you got for your fourth Christmas? I just wanted to tell you I loved riding fast with you. I hope you have a bike where you are at now and can ride as fast as your heart desires. Someday we will ride together again. Love you, Sara.”
December 18
Dan’s Apartment – 1:30 a.m.
Panting, shaking, and drenched in sweat, Dan bolted upright in his bed. He worked to slow his breathing and tried to dispel his nightmare which gripped him. His heart continued to race as the images assaulted him even now that he was awake. Getting out of his damp bed, Dan paced his room. He glanced at the clock. Damn, one thirty in the morning.
He stumbled out to his common room and stared at the pictures on his desk. His breaths came in short shudders. The nightmare scared the hell out of him. Dan’s eyes welled with tears, and he allowed them to course down his cheeks.
Dan was reaching for his phone before he knew what he was doing and pressed speed dial. After a groggy voice answered, Dan rushed out in a single breath, “I lost all of you. My brothers, my team, my family, you were all killed and I couldn’t do a damned thing to save you. Everyone was blown to bits.”
“Breathe, just breathe a moment.”
Sucking in raggedly, Dan tried to comply but couldn’t gain control as screams of those he loved echoed in his ears.
“Alright. Inhale. Hold, two, three, four. Exhale. That’s right.” Blaze coached Blondie through breathing for several minutes. He glanced at the clock noting it was one thirty. He wondered what prompted Blondie’s nightmare and wished he could be closer than a phone call and a one-hour flight to him.
Dan slumped down into the black chair. Listening to Blaze’s solid voice reassured him it had only been a dream. If Blaze was talking to him, he was alive, and that meant the others were too.
His breathing under control, Dan said, “I had a nightmare.”
“Sounds like a bad one. Want to talk?”
Wiping his eyes, Dan gazed outside. The skyline was bright with lights, not fireballs. Shakily, he said, “I took lethal action today … yesterday actually. But this isn’t related. You all died, and I was left alone. Both Toronto and Ottawa exploded. Bombs with untold power blew at all the major locations. Everyone I love died. I couldn’t protect anyone. Scared the hell out of me. Felt so real.”
Dan lowered his shaking hand to his thigh and pressed to make it stop. The images of his loved ones being blown up surged forth again. Pushing out of his chair, Dan raced to his bathroom dropping his phone on the tile as he knelt before the porcelain throne and heaved up onion rings and root beer.
Blaze listened and contemplated calling Jim, but that would mean he would have to hang up on Blondie and he wouldn’t do that. After several minutes the puking stopped. He waited another few minutes hearing water run before shaky breathing came in clear and distinct again. “Blondie, you there?”
Sitting against the wall, Dan picked up the phone and heard Blaze. “Yeah.”
“Want me to call Jim?”
“No.”
“Reaction to the nightmare or are you ill?”
His stomach settling, Dan answered, “Nightmare.”
“How can I help?”
“You already helped.” Dan banged his head on the bathroom wall, thinking he was weak for being so affected by a damned dream.
“Don’t go there, Blondie. Quit banging your head. That’s an order.”
“Not my comman
ding officer.”
“I’ll always be your CO. And more importantly your brother.”
“Dad.”
“What?”
“Might be weird to you, but I think of you as my dad. Never said this out loud, but I do. You’ve always been there when I need you. You listen to me and know the right things to say. You accept me for who I am and protect me.”
Blaze’s heart filled with a sense of peace hearing Blondie call him dad. “As a father should, Son.”
“What?”
“Son. I’ve thought of you as a son, for many years now.”
“Really? How long?”
“Longer than I recognized. I’m a bit slow sometimes. I became aware of my feelings after we rescued you. Winds and Mason figured things out before I did. Said I treated you in the same way I did Daphy.” A small pang of loss rippled in his heart at the thought of his baby sister. He lost all his natural family. Blondie filled the void.
“Rooftop in Makhachkala.”
“What?”
“For me, it was when you found me on the rooftop of the hotel. When you told me, I’m a man based on the choices I make, not on what is done to me.” Dan blew out a breath. “That night I wished you were my dad. You said things I yearned for so long for the general to say to me. Maybe my father tried, but I didn’t hear him back then.”
“Couldn’t.”
“What?”
“You couldn’t. You had a path to follow. A hard one, but perhaps there is a reason for all you endured. Your path forged a man who is true of heart and soul. One who is willing to make sacrifices to help others.”
Dan bowed his head. “Never thought of it like that.”
“One more thing, Blondie. You’re a man I’m proud to call son.”
Acceptable Nap Location?
25
December 18
Bram’s Car – 4:35 a.m.
Dan remained quiet and reserved as Bram drove. His mind intuitively called the one man who he could talk to about that kind of nightmare. Dan had been surprised Blaze was sleeping. One thirty in Toronto would have been ten in the morning in Kandahar.
Blaze explained they had just returned from a night mission. Dan disliked interrupting Blaze’s sleep. The revelations both shared regarding the nature of their relationship still left Dan in awe. After Blaze told him he was proud of him, they talked for nearly two hours about everything under the sun, which helped to lessen the impact of the nightmare’s images.
He wished that Blaze, Winds, and Mason would be in country when he was in Ottawa, but they were all currently deployed. Blaze promised to visit him as soon as he got back from Kandahar and hoped all three would be back in time for Jim’s wedding. So did Dan.
After hanging up with Blaze, there was only an hour before Bram would arrive, so he stayed awake. He dug the jar of instant coffee out of the trash, chuckling that Lexa was a coffee snob. He drank two strong cups, but he was now dragging a bit. He leaned his head on the window and closed his eyes to rest for now.
Bram glanced again at Dan. He looks like shit today. I doubt he slept at all last night based on the dark smudges under his eyes. Can I talk him into taking the day off without pissing him off?
Dan jerked, and his eyes flew open as he drew in a deep breath. Images from his nightmare invaded his thoughts again. He struggled to push them away. It isn’t real. They’re all alive and safe. Bombs like that don’t exist. Who would target Toronto and Ottawa anyway? This is only something my stupid mind conjured up. Dan kept his eyes open, afraid the images would assault him again.
Bram heard Dan’s intake of breath and the lurch of his body. The lethal shot must be difficult for him. I want to say something, but he will think I’m a mother-hen. I put my offer out there. It is up to Dan to accept or not. Bram understood that even the most justified lethal action took a toll on all of them. Doing right didn’t mean they got to feel right—a depressing downside of this job.
Instead of bringing any of that up, Bram said, “How about we stop at Timmy’s and grab some coffee for the team? Surprise them.”
Dan turned to Bram. “I look that bad?”
Bram half-chuckled. “Eyes red and at half-mast … trouble sleeping?”
“Yeah,” Dan replied after a few moments of silence.
Contradicting his thought only moments ago, Bram uttered, “You could’ve called me.”
Dan raked a hand through his short hair and then leaned his head on the back of the seat. “Called Blaze. He was up.”
Bram nodded. The war in him to help Dan raged. His resolve strengthened. He wouldn’t push Dan. If he wanted to talk, he would. “So, Timmy’s?”
Yawning Dan replied, “Yeah, I could mainline caffeine right about now.”
TRF HQ – Gym – 5:10 a.m.
Jon peered down at Bram, as he spotted him on the weight bench. When Bram put the bar in the holder, Jon glanced around. “Where’s Dan?”
Loki threw a punch at the heavy bag. Being the last one to enter the gym today, he answered, “Saw him in the locker room. Dantastic was moving a little slow this morning.”
Glancing at one another, Lexa and Jon both realized Dan probably didn’t sleep well last night.
Throwing several one-two punches, Loki asked, “Hey, Jon, did Jennifer talk to Doug’s wife yesterday?”
Jon grinned. “Yes. All arranged. You and Dan are turning into a legendary pair with this prank. Bravo Team is never gonna suspect a thing.”
“Everything is set. I talked to Echo Team yesterday after the call, and they all agreed to help tonight.” Loki grinned broadly.
“Loki, you ever think this might start a prank war?” Ray stared at his best friend and chuckled as he pedaled on the stationary bike.
Lexa shook her head as she jogged. “Nah, that won’t happen. After tonight, they’ll think long and hard before they prank one of us again.”
Ten minutes later Jon looked around—worried Dan had not shown up yet. He wanted to give him space after yesterday, knowing Dan usually used the heavy bag to work out his feelings. “I’m gonna go see what’s keeping Dan.” Jon headed out of the gym.
TRF HQ – Men’s Locker Room – 5:20 a.m.
Entering the lockers, Jon found the room quiet and seemingly empty. Bravo Team was the only other team on duty, and they were out patrolling. He strode to Dan’s aisle wondering if yesterday’s lethal affected Dan more than usual. Perhaps NRB’s grilling caused doubt to creep in. He’d seen that happen to other officers, but never to Dan. Though, there was a first time for everything.
He turned the corner and stopped abruptly. Jon grinned and shook his head. Man, Dano can sleep anywhere. Locker room bench just made it to the unacceptable nap locations list. Well maybe not.
His grin faded as he studied Dan for a long moment. He appeared haggard even in sleep. Dan must’ve had one hell of a rough night. Jon had way too much experience with how difficult taking a life could be.
Jon turned and soundlessly left the room, deciding that instead of waking Dan, he would let him sleep until he must wake up for a call.
TRF HQ – Gym – 5:25 a.m.
Trying to burn off all the cookies he ate in the last week Nick jogged at a brisk pace putting extra effort into his workout. When Jon reentered the gym without Dan in tow, he slowed down a bit. “You find Dan?”
Jon nodded as he strode to a treadmill next to Nick. “Yeah, … gave him a special assignment.”
Nick grinned. “And that would be?”
“Inspecting the inside of his eyelids,” Jon quipped.
The team chuckled and internally applauded Jon’s decision.
“How long?” Nick increased his pace again.
“For as long as it takes or we get a critical call, whichever is first.”
Lexa hopped off the treadmill and gave Jon an impromptu hug. “Thanks for not waking him.”
Surprised by Lexa’s display of emotion, Jon’s brows raised but he said, “We’ve all been there. Sleepless nights after a lethal ar
e no fun.”
Turning to Loki, Lexa said firmly, “No pranking him.”
Raising his hands, palms out, Loki’s eyes opened with sincerity. “Wouldn’t dream of it.” Loki started back in on the heavy bag. Truthfully there is no way in hell I would prank Dan after yesterday. He looked so wiped out when he handed me coffee this morning.
Loki figured Dan only slept a couple of hours last night, if at all. He was pleased Jon let him sleep and didn’t make Dan take the day off. They all would keep an eye on Dan today, just like he always watched out for them.
Ottawa – Blaze’s Home – 7:00 a.m.
Yawning Blaze wandered out to the kitchen and found a hot pot of coffee already brewed and waiting for him on the counter. He smelled bacon too and glanced toward the couch in the family room area. “Morning.”
Winds glanced from the TV to Blaze. “You look like crap. Bacon’s in the oven keeping warm if you want some.”
After pouring a mug of steaming black gold, and snagging a few bacon strips, Blaze ambled over to his overstuffed recliner and lowered his body down sluggishly. Sipping his coffee, he leaned back and relaxed.
“Blaze, why so wrung out?” Winds set his plate on the low table between them and studied his best friend. “You coming down with something?”
“No, just didn’t get much sleep last night.”
“Why?”
“Blondie called.” He took a bite of bacon and returned Winds’ gaze. “Half tempted to wreck our surprise and fly down there today. The kid had one hell of a nightmare in the wee hours of the morning. Shook him up badly. Spent a couple of hours on the phone with him.”
Winds sighed. “Damn, thought Blondie was done with having night terrors. Though I guess, that is only wishful thinking with all he’s experienced. When did he call and what spawned his dream this time?”
“About one thirty. Blondie had to take someone out yesterday, and he had a rough go of it with the NRB. A new agent, don’t remember his name, grilled him hard for several hours.”
Shaking his head, Winds said, “How the hell does he put up with those interviews? I appreciate accountability, public trust, and all, but it galls me they treat constables like the criminals they are fighting against. They should applaud officers who get rid of the scum.”