The Lake

by Grant, AnnaLisa

  Chapter 18

  Will’s scheduling plan is working perfectly. I’m never alone and I get to see him in two of my classes. I’m pleased to find that most of the Heyward students really don’t care either way about me, although some of them make rude comments about me going “from rags to riches.” It’s annoying, but not anything that I can’t handle. I’m approached a dozen times in the first few weeks of school by people who want to take me on as their own Eliza Doolittle, but Gwen and Caroline are swift to come to my rescue. After a few body guard barricades by Chris and Tyler, it’s a safe bet that no one is going to risk personal injury just to get to me.

  I’m in a groove with my classes, doing as well as I expected in all of them. Honors English Lit is a breeze as we’re studying one of my favorites, Beowolf. Trig and chemistry are the thorns in my side I had anticipated. I’m meeting with Marcus once or twice a week for tutoring. He mainly comes to the house, but sometimes we meet in the school library so the Heyward elite can see us, but only when Will is studying there, too. Will hasn’t said as much, but I think he’d prefer that we meet at the house all the time so he or Luke and Claire can keep an eye on me. Tutoring is going well. I get it a little bit more every day and my anxiety about being an eternal senior is beginning to dissipate.

  Marcus and I made a public appearance at the last concert of the summer on the Green as Will suggested. The Davidson College Symphony was closing out the summer concert series and it seemed like it was even more crowded than usual. It was especially thick with college students, most of whom Marcus knew. As we stopped and chatted with people, Marcus was sure to introduce me as his girlfriend. While we were on display for everyone my main objective was to be seen by Will’s father. Marcus made a point to hold my hand or put his arm around me, which was hard for Will to see but exactly what Will’s father needed. Gregory Meyer is at every one of the concerts and this one was no exception.

  It’s not easy for my heart to belong to Will and not be able to be with him. It’s proving to be a more difficult undertaking than I thought. It’s especially hard when I’m with Marcus and Will is right there, being forced to watch every moment. I wish there were an easier way to do this.

  *****

  The weather is turning cold and I’m experiencing my first real fall. Its 55 degrees during the day and I’m freezing. It’s not that it doesn’t get cold in Florida, but it’s just that fifty-five here and fifty-five there are two different temperatures. Will thinks it’s hysterical, but he doesn’t mind holding me closer to warm me up, and neither do I.

  Claire enjoys another shopping trip with me after she asked me to put on my warmest sweater and I pulled out a lightweight button-up cardigan. It’s so different from what I’m used to, but I’m really enjoying the crisp air and the crunch of the leaves. It’s nice to live in a place with four whole seasons. It helps me focus on this being a new chapter in my life.

  It’s already the end of October and Will and I have successfully evaded being caught by anyone who might reveal us to his father. We spend most of our time together at my house, and sometimes with our friends. They cover for us quite a bit, allowing us to have time alone together away from my house. We take day trips to quaint mountain towns, and sometimes drive into Charlotte.

  When we’re home, Luke and Claire are great about giving us enough privacy that we don’t feel like we’re being watched all the time. Will also does a great job of making our dates creative. He’s taking his job of making our relationship as normal as possible very seriously. We’ve had a picnic on the floor of the loft when it was pouring rain outside. One day he pretended he was a great artist and sketched me. It was the best stick figure rendition of me I had ever seen. Another time Will tried to teach me how to fish off the dock. For a Florida girl, I am awful at fishing. I caught nothing, but Will was patient. We laughed a lot that day.

  There’s a buzz in the air about the New Year’s Eve Gala even though we haven’t even crossed the threshold into November. The school doesn’t have a sports program and so there are no homecoming games or dances like at normal schools. In order for all the girls at the school to have a chance at practicing their formal arm-candy stance Mr. Meyer throws a huge party on New Year’s Eve.

  It’s like planning for a wedding the way the girls at school talk about it. There are dresses to be designed and fittings to attend, and under no circumstance will there be an off-the-rack dress worn by any of them. I already don’t want to go, but I know I’ll have to attend. Will is obligated to go and I hate the idea of him going and not being there, too. I can only imagine how handsome he’s going to look in his tuxedo. While I won’t be able to do anything about it, I’d at least like to see which prima donna witch tries to dig her claws into him, and I suppose I secretly want an opportunity to look beautiful for him.

  Halloween is apparently a big deal in Davidson. The town has organized another stellar affair. I’ve grown to appreciate their events. They are always done so well and end up being a lot of fun. Besides, I feel a lot less like an outsider when I’m out of the Hayward bubble and out milling about with the whole town.

  The Halloween parade and trick-or-treating party meet my every expectation of the hometown greatness I’ve come to love about Davidson. Merchants have set up tables outside so kids can come and show off their costumes and get candy. I laugh to myself as I remember Halloween with my parents. Ours was that house – the one that gave out Scarrots and other healthy “treats.” There is none of that here, just pure, unadulterated sugar.

  I stand on the side of the Green watching the kids march up and down the sidewalk in search of the merchant who is giving out the best candy. I love watching the kids for whom this is their first Halloween. They’re easy to spot. They’re the kids who, when the candy is dropped in their bag, start shaking in disbelief that they just got more free candy. They’re even cuter because they’re usually around three years old.

  As I stand watching the sidewalk festivities Will nonchalantly positions himself next to me among the scattered passing crowd and we enjoy the view together for a few minutes.

  “Where are you parents?” I ask without turning to look at him. I’m probably being overly cautious, but I don’t want to seem too interested in him, as there are several people from school around.

  “They’re getting coffee, but they’ve got a charity dinner to go to tonight. What are you doing later? I thought I could come over,” Will says.

  “That sounds great. I think Luke and Claire are going to the same thing.” I smile, probably a little too big, but the idea of being totally and completely alone with Will for a few hours makes me happier than I’m allowed to fully express.

  “I’ll pick up Chinese on my way over. By the way…I love you.” Will grins knowing that we’re sharing a moment right there in front of everyone and no one has a clue.

  We see Mr. and Mrs. Meyer exit the coffee shop and scan through the crowd looking for Will. They cross the street and make their way toward us, heads held high in the confidence that they’ve located their son. I’m nervous, even though Will and I haven’t as much as glanced at each other, and I can’t imagine that they would see this as anything but two friends having run into each other at a town event. Before they can reach us, Marcus jaywalks right to where we are and puts his arm around my waist. Will stiffens and takes a step back. Then, as if the timing were rehearsed, Marcus kisses me on the cheek and says, “Hey babe,” just as Will’s parents reach us.

  “Hello Marcus,” Mr. Meyer says as he hands Will his coffee. “It’s nice to see you. How’s your family doing?” His tenor is so obviously passive-aggressive. I’m impressed that Marcus doesn’t punch him right then and there.

  “Hello, sir. My family is doing well, thank you.” Marcus’ reply shows that he’s the better man. From what I understand, this is the first time Marcus has had any exchange with Mr. Meyer since his parents picked up with his sister and left town to only he knows where. He’s smooth and calm in his response, but
squeezes me just a bit tighter in what I assume is an effort to maintain his coolness.

  “I understand you’ve snatched up our newest resident. You two look very happy together. Don’t they look happy together, William?” Mr. Meyer says. Will is right. His father doesn’t believe us for a second, and he’s taking his chance to rub our futile charade in Will’s face.

  “Yes…so happy it’s almost distasteful,” Will replies, relaying his disapproval.

  “Yes, well, Layla is one in a million. Any guy would be lucky to have her choose him. I consider myself incredibly fortunate to have her.” Marcus pulls me closer to him, as if that were possible, and I see Will’s nostrils flare.

  “William, we’re ready to leave,” his father says directly.

  “I’d be happy to give Will a ride home if he wants to stay and hang out with us. Layla and I are going out later but I can take him home on our way. It’s no trouble,” Marcus offers in a lie.

  Will nods silently in acceptance of Marcus’ suggestion, and Mr. and Mrs. Meyer leave without saying much more. We’re not there much longer before it’s clear that Will can’t take watching Marcus with me anymore. I have to admit that Marcus’ commitment to this charade is a bit much. I’m not sure that an actual boyfriend touches his actual girlfriend quite this much in public. Marcus has either held my hand or had his arm around me the entire time. I hate to think that he’s doing it to get back at Will, but it’s hard not to entertain that possibility. I can’t take watching Will suffer any longer so I tell them both I’m tired and ready to go home.

  The drive home is humiliating for Will as he squishes into the back seat of Marcus’ two-door hatch back. I barely have time to give Will a quick hug before he’s bolted and I see his front door closing. It only takes a few minutes and Marcus is pulling into my driveway.

  “Thanks, Marcus, for stepping in back there. We really appreciate it,” I say as we walk to the porch.

  “I’m not sure that Will appreciated it too much,” he says.

  “Well, you might want to tone it down a bit. It’s just hard for him to see me with you…like that.” I should be more forceful with him about his behavior, but I don’t want to lose his support. There may come a day soon when we need him to really be there.

  “Well…it’s not easy for me to see you with him.” Marcus takes my hand.

  “Marcus…” I pull away.

  “I just don’t want to see you get hurt, Layla.” Marcus takes a step closer and for a moment I think he’s going to try to kiss me. I feel a twist in my stomach and I don’t know what to do.

  “Marcus. I…” I’m cut off by a sound that takes me back to the most horrific night of my life. The screeching of Will’s tires brings him to a rapid stop in the driveway. As he flies out of the car I can see the fury on his face and know that this is not good.

  “What do you think you were doing back there? I trusted you and then you’ve got your hands all over her!” Will shouts as he charges at Marcus.

  “I was just doing what you asked me to do!” Marcus matches Will’s volume.

  “Pawing her in public was NEVER part of the deal,” Will barks as he pushes Marcus, making him stumble backward. Marcus gains his footing and charges back at Will. Before I know it, they’ve each gotten more than one punch in and are both bleeding.

  “Will! Stop! What are you doing?” I yell, stepping in between them with no regard to the risk of getting punched myself.

  “Me? You’re ok with having his hands all over you like that, and kissing you?” he says half charging at me now. He’s so angry. His face is red and he’s yelling at me. I back up with every step he takes toward me.

  “No, Will! It’s not like that and you know it! Why are you acting like this?”

  “Haven’t you considered why he agreed to help us? This is his chance, his opportunity to make my life a living hell as vengeance for what happened with Holly. And you…you’re falling right into his plan aren’t you?” I have considered it. I feel the sharp sting of every word and tears well up in my eyes. I tilt my head back to keep them from streaming down my face. “Or maybe there’s another reason why his was the first name that came to mind.” I don’t even have time to gather my thoughts to express a coherent statement of defense before Marcus intervenes.

  “Back off, Will!” Marcus stands in between us. “You’re scaring her.” Will stops in his tracks, panting, with his chest heaving.

  “Just keep your hands off of her.” Will wipes the blood from his lip as he moves his dagger-filled stare from Marcus to a less deadly glower at me. He holds his gaze on me for few long seconds. “I’ll deal with you later.” I struggle to look beyond his rage, but it’s difficult. He gets back into his car, tires screeching out of the driveway the same way he entered.

  It takes another few minutes before I’m confident I can speak without bursting into tears. “I’m so sorry, Marcus. I’ll talk to him and get him to apologize,” I say examining the cut by his eye.

  “You’re staying with him? Layla…that was Gregory Meyer. You can’t seriously still want to be with him?” Marcus tries to furrow his brow but it aggravates his cut and he winces.

  “Just because things are…complicated…doesn’t mean they can’t work.” I realize as I’m saying this that I’m not sure who I’m trying to convince. I spent years in a complicated situation with my grandparents. It wasn’t what I wanted but I made it work for their sake. If I could do it then when I didn’t even want to, I can do it now…for me, can’t I?

  We don’t talk about it anymore, and I decide not to address his lack of respect for my personal space. If it happens again I’ll be forced to, but I’m hoping he had a momentary lapse in judgment and it won’t be an issue. I take him in the house, tend to his wound and send him home.

  Over the next days at school it isn’t difficult for me to pretend to not be with Will. I’m confused. Part of me understands Will’s anger. I can’t imagine how I would feel to see him with another girl, but another part of me, a part that I don’t want to admit is really there, is afraid that Marcus is right. I witnessed the fury that boils inside the Meyer men. His last words to me ring in my ears. I’ll deal with you later. Now I’m something to be dealt with?

  Will tries to talk to me in the covert way we learned to communicate in front of others, but I can’t respond. I’m not sure what to say, but more afraid that I’ll cry if I start to talk. He comes to the house, but I don’t want to see him…not yet. I just need some time to figure things out.

  “Do you want to talk about it?” Claire asks, finding me in my favorite spot in the loft again. She didn’t have to look hard. I come home from school every day and sit here, staring out the window until dinner. I can see the lake even better now that the leaves have fallen from the trees. It’s a perfect picture of the changing season in so many ways.

  “This…it’s just harder than I thought it was going to be. I thought it would be romantic. You know…clandestine love and all. It just makes me feel…alone. I can’t be myself because myself loves Will. I don’t know what to do.” I feel more confused now that I’m verbalizing the garbled mess of my emotions. It’s like when you cut a pan of brownies but haven’t waited long enough for them to cool. They crumble and fall apart and there’s no way to piece it back together so that it remotely resembles a square.

  “Layla, you’re not obligated to anything or anyone. If you’re not sure what you want, you’re allowed to take a step back and reevaluate. You’re still so young and so much is going to change for you over the next few years of your life.” Claire always has a way of letting me off the hook and making me feel empowered at the same time.

  “I love him, Claire. But…” I don’t want to tell her about Will’s rage. She’ll pull the plug for sure and then it won’t be my decision. I need her help, and I did promise that I would tell her if anything happened. “Will kind of freaked me out the other night.”

  “What do you mean?” Claire tilts her head in suspicion.

&nb
sp; “Marcus stepped in at Halloween and covered for us in front of Will’s parents. He was a little touchy-feely and Will didn’t like it. He and Marcus got in a fight and then Will…well…he got really angry and yelled at me because he thought I was taking Marcus’ side.”

  “Layla…” Claire starts.

  “He was just hurt because he didn’t like seeing me with Marcus that way. I didn’t like it either,” I say in Will’s defense.

  “This is what I was talking about.” Claire’s eyes get bigger and I can see that she’s upset. It’s the first time I’ve seen this expression. Usually Claire is soft and tender, but right now she looks like she could fight a lion and win.

  Luke interrupts us to tell me that Will is there and wants to see me. Luke never answers for me. He always asks in case my decision has changed.

  “Tell him I’ll be there in a minute,” I answer Luke. “Claire, I’m willing to understand what happened. I really can’t blame him for being upset. Marcus went overboard, but the whole thing made me realize that I don’t think I can do this until graduation…or indefinitely. I don’t think I can pretend anymore. I mean, I thought everything was going great, but…after what happened I realize that as long as we have to pretend, Will is going to be faced with seeing me with someone else. It just doesn’t seem fair to either one of us.” I’m devastated at the idea of telling Will. We’ve promised so much to each other. I don’t like going back on my word.

  “The most important thing is that you’re true to yourself. Even though we love someone, sometimes we have to let go because loving them compromises who we are. I’m proud of you, Layla.” Claire gives me a hug of support before I go downstairs and break Will’s heart.