Best I've Ever Had

by Abbi Glines

  “Bacon,” he said in a deep voice raspy from sleep. “My favorite smell to wake up to.”

  My cheeks were heated. I knew it. But he was standing there with his bare chest and sexy hair making my body tingle. “I hope I didn’t wake you. I was trying to be quiet,” I said and grabbed the eggs to start cracking in a bowl. Anything other than looking at him like he was my breakfast. I needed to get control of my flushed face too. That was embarrassing.

  “You didn’t. But if you had it would have been okay,” he replied and although I was studying the bowl and eggs like they were a science experiment, I could see him moving closer to the kitchen. Luckily his man smell would be covered by the bacon so my hormones wouldn’t go any more crazy. The sight of him was enough.

  “I have to be downstairs by eight-thirty and I wanted to make sure you had breakfast, so I got started early,” I was rambling, but I continued. “We had a small break after the May recital, but the toddler summer camp classes are on Saturdays in June.”

  He didn’t respond but walked around the counter and I glanced over to see him stop in front of the espresso machine and coffee pot. He met my gaze and raised his eyebrows as if confused. “Does this side make the coffee?” he asked.

  I put the eggshell down on the paper towel then quickly washed my hands before going to help him. “This already has coffee made in it,” I explained, taking a mug out of the cabinet in front of him. “The other just makes espresso shots. Do you want a shot to go in your coffee?” I asked and was proud of the fact my cheeks weren’t pink anymore and I appeared relaxed.

  “Uh, sure,” he said not sounding sure at all.

  I moved at a normal pace while going through the steps to make the espresso so he could see what I was doing. Instead of the rushed way I typically did it when trying to get the caffeine quickly.

  “You want me to check on the bacon?” he asked then and I realized I’d forgotten about it. Before I could reply, he was moving over to the stove and flipping the bacon. The popping sound of the grease should have been a clear enough reminder I was cooking it, but I’d been so wrapped up in Eli, I’d managed to block it all out.

  “Bacon isn’t on my list of things I cook well,” I admitted.

  He glanced back over his shoulder at me and the smile on his face said he was clearly amused by that admission. I laughed. At myself and the fact I was a terrible host. If the way to a man’s heart was through his stomach, I was screwed.

  Eli turned back to the bacon, but the corners of his mouth were still lifted. I liked knowing I’d put that smile there. “I’ll handle the bacon. You do the eggs,” he said.

  I made his coffee with the shot of espresso in it then set it beside him. “Do you need sugar or cream?” I asked.

  “Black is just fine,” he replied and took a sip. “Damn, that’ll wake you up.”

  I nodded as I finished with the bowl of eggs. “That’s the idea.”

  Taking out a larger skillet for the eggs, we began cooking in silence beside each other. It wasn’t weird or uncomfortable at all. This was one of the things I liked about Eli. You didn’t feel like you had to speak just to fill the silence.

  I wanted to stop cooking and just go sit on the sofa and watch him fry bacon with his shirt off in my kitchen. I was pretty sure that was the equivalent of porn for women.

  “Fuck,” he muttered and stepped back. I was jerked out of my thoughts as he stood back at arm’s length while moving the bacon from the stove.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked, trying to figure out what had happened.

  “Grease,” he said simply then went to the sink to wet a paper towel. “Frying bacon without a shirt wasn’t the smartest idea,” he told me then he smirked as he wiped at his impressive abs. I could see the red welt the hot grease had caused.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t think about that,” I admitted.

  He lifted his amused gaze. “I don’t reckon you’ve ever fried bacon topless before. So why would you?”

  That made me laugh. He was right. I’d never fried bacon topless. Nor had a man ever done so in my presence. “Good point. Do you want me to get you some ointment?” I asked, still smiling even though he was hurt.

  He shook his head. “No, it hurt but I’m not that big of a baby. It’s fine.” He tossed the paper towel in the trashcan then began taking the bacon out of the grease and laying it on the plate covered in paper towels I’d prepared for it.

  The timer on the oven went off and I was glad I’d set it because the biscuits would have been forgotten. Cooking wasn’t my strong suit and doing things in the morning that took any thought was also not my strong suit. I was struggling all the way around with this endeavor.

  Grabbing an oven mitt, I got the biscuits out and set them on the marble counter. The eggs were finished and luckily I’d at least remembered to cut the burner off before walking away from them. In my rare moment of focus, I spun around to get plates only to have two large hands firmly grab my waist. I stilled instantly and all other thought slipped my mind.

  Eli was standing in front of me. His head tilted so he was looking down at me. The humor from just a moment ago was gone from his expression. He stood there holding me. His fingers flexed and dug into my skin but not painfully so. Just enough to feel good.

  Without saying a word, he lowered his mouth to mine and I was instantly thankful for brushing my teeth, but then I forgot even that. His kiss deepened and he held me close as we stood there tasting each other. I was lost in a moment of complete contentment.

  The kiss wasn’t long and ended before I was ready. Eli let his hands fall away as he stepped back. “Thanks for breakfast,” he said then grinned before reaching past me and taking the plates I had been about to get. “And the kiss.”

  JUNE 10 / 11:34 AM

  Eli Hardy

  GRAN’S CHEMO TREATMENTS had started two days ago. When my dad had called to remind me, I’d been trying to decide my next move with Ophelia. We had cooked breakfast together, I’d then kissed her because I needed to touch her so damn bad. However, I’d had to end it before I took her up against the fridge like a mad man. While we ate, she told me about everything from what she had to do at work that day to her sister’s current situation. I could have listened to her talk all day and been happy. She had appeared nervous at first, but as she talked, she relaxed. I asked questions and listened. That seemed to make her more comfortable too.

  I had cleaned up the kitchen while she went to get ready for work. It had given me something to do and kept me busy while she was getting a shower. Knowing she had been naked in there had been hard to ignore. I didn’t want her to think I was there just for the sex. The sex was amazing, but it wasn’t what I needed the most. Just being near her was the one thing I couldn’t seem to walk away from. I needed her.

  I wouldn’t have been able to leave her if it wasn’t for the fact I needed to go see my gran. When I was near her, my void was forgotten. Almost as if it wasn’t there. Ophelia masked it somehow. I craved that feeling of freedom her presence gave me. With her, even the silence was safe. There were no demons waiting to haunt me. She managed to keep it all away.

  My uncle Preston had picked me up before noon and I’d been back in Sea Breeze by the time Gran’s treatment was over. My parents, sisters, Aunt Amanda, Uncle Preston, their boys, Larissa, Micah and Jilly had already arrived at Gran’s with dinner and had been sitting around the living room. The younger ones had been out at the pool. I had worried that everyone there would be too much on Gran after her treatment, but she had insisted on being put in her recliner in the living room. Even pale and weak looking she was smiling as she sat tucked under several blankets. My grandfather was the only one who was unable to act normal. The fear, worry, and concern etched on his face was clear. He had appeared to be in more pain than Gran.

  My dad and Aunt Amanda were taking turns with staying there to help him with Gran through the weekend. I’d told both of them I’d stay the Monday and Tuesday then Larissa had wanted to be
with her Wednesday and Thursday while she was off work. Aunt Amanda was taking Friday and half of Saturday and my dad the other half of the weekend.

  Until Gran was stable and in better health, I knew I was going to be in Sea Breeze. We didn’t know how long we had with her or if the chemo would give her the time we hoped it would. Leaving was not an option I could consider now.

  Finding somewhere to rent short term was my first objective on Wednesday, then I needed a job. After I got that handled, I’d need to go back to Atlanta and pick up my last paycheck at the club I had been a bouncer at for the past eight months. Then get my things from Grate’s apartment. The lease on my place had been up at the end of May. I’d known when I came back here I wasn’t sure where I would go next but that I wouldn’t return to Atlanta to live. Grate had taken my things for me until I knew more about Gran and my plans.

  That was going to take the rest of the week and weekend. Which bothered me. The only thing I wanted to do was go back to Rosemary Beach and be with Ophelia. Although she understood why I had needed to leave, it didn’t ease my ache to be near her. We were keeping in contact daily through text messages and calls. I was trying to remember that getting in too deep with her was only going to end badly. But every time I thought about her, every time I talked to her, I couldn’t seem to care. Feeling guilty about how she made me forget, she made me smile, it too was getting easier. If I didn’t dwell on it too much.

  “Eli, get yourself some sweet tea and come sit with me,” Gran called from the sunroom she’d been napping in. When I had arrived this morning, my grandfather had gone to work and Gran had wanted me to bring her into the sunroom where she was going to read a book Amanda had brought her. I had gone in there to join her with a book of my own I’d taken from the study, but reading had soon put her to sleep.

  I already had a glass of sweet tea, so I picked it up from the small table beside me. Afraid I’d get a call and disturb Gran’s sleep, I had moved to the living room. Far enough away not to bother her rest but close enough she could call to me.

  I stopped by the kitchen and took the cup of ice water that came with a lid and a straw with me too. Gran would be thirsty. I had taken her cup when I left her earlier so I could get her fresh water for when she woke up.

  The sunroom was just off to the right of the kitchen. Gran had always loved this room. She kept her flowers and plants in here. When we were younger, all the girls had tea parties with Gran at the round glass table that sat in the right corner. The windows overlooked the backyard and the pool. There were memories of our childhood attached to this space. Birthday parties we’d had, summers in the pool, Easter Egg Hunts in the backyard. I knew those were also reasons Gran loved this room.

  “Here’s your water,” I told her as I set the drink beside her. “Are you feeling hungry yet?” Her appetite was nonexistent. She was trying though. If only to keep my dad and Aunt Amanda from worrying so much.

  “I’ll eat in a bit. Sit and talk to me. Tell me about your time away, the people you met, and the dark shadows of pain in your beautiful eyes.”

  I paused for a brief second then sat down in the chair beside the recliner my grandfather had bought her recently to keep in the sunroom. If my parents had noticed, neither had mentioned it, but Gran had never been one to mince words. She got to the point. With her weakened state telling her what I’d not shared with anyone seemed like a bad idea. She’d worry about me. She needed to focus on her body and mind.

  “Life outside Sea Breeze is different. I’ve seen a lot,” I said, hoping it was enough and knowing that it wouldn’t be. Not for my gran.

  She cleared her throat weakly and took a drink of her water then shift slightly in her large pale blue recliner so she could see me better. The “don’t bullshit me boy” frown on her face was still as intimidating as it had been in my childhood. I hadn’t expected that frown and seeing something so familiar from the healthy full of life Gran I’d always known gave me hope. For her. Not me.

  “I’ve lived my own pain right here in this town and survived. Don’t tell me about having seen a lot. That’s not what I’m getting at and you know it. There are scars in that soul and I can see it clearly in those eyes of yours. You can’t hide that behind tattoos and a lot of hair. Not to me, you can’t. It don’t fool me at all.” She took a deep breath and I didn’t like seeing her get worked up.

  I leaned forward and took her frail hand in mine. “I’m fine. Good. You need to focus on you. We all need you and I won’t be fine if you don’t fight through this. You need your strength and your focus needs to be on you.” That was as close to honesty as Gran needed.

  She sighed and then rolled her eyes at me. The reaction looked so much like my aunt Amanda, I wanted to laugh. Gran appeared younger in that moment. I wanted to remember it for the day I would need her memories to hold onto.

  “You, my beautiful boy, have always had my heart. I don’t do favorites, but you are your father. In looks and personality. You have his smile, his laugh, his beautiful heart. My other grandsons are their father.” She shook her head in exasperation, but the soft smile on her lips made it clear my cousins were loved as dearly as I was. “I love those wild boys with a fierceness. But you get a special place because when you were born, it was like watching my Marcus grow all over again. And I see the difference deep inside you. You’ve been hurt in a way that will forever mark you. Now, tell your gran what happened.”

  I knew no matter what I did to persuade her that I was okay, she’d keep on pushing. Nothing would stop her from hitting me with questions. They’d get more direct and she’d pull all she could from me. It would be her will against mine.

  I decided to give her some. Maybe it would be enough. I just couldn’t give her all of it. Speaking the truth aloud was more than I could do. Even now.

  “I fell in love and she was killed in a car accident.” That was as truthful as I could be with Gran. The details, the other . . . I couldn’t.

  Gran thought about that for a few moments and I said nothing. Waiting to see what else she’d want to know. Or if she’d push for more. Finally after she stared over my shoulder with a thoughtful expression, her gaze met mine again. “What was her name?” she asked me.

  “Alice,” I replied, and her face was there in my memory. Not the bright beaming smile that had first drawn me in but the face . . . the face I’d had to identify . . . the face of death. Something no man is prepared for. “O’Connor,” I added her maiden name just to distract myself. The memories I wanted to forget were forcing themselves to replay in my head.

  “Irish,” Gran pointed out.

  I nodded. “Yes, both her parents moved to the states from Ireland when they were just kids.” A story I’d heard about when I’d met them. The day we went to tell them we had gotten married.

  “You loved her more than you’d always loved Bliss then?” she asked me. I was positive that no one else had the guts to ask me something that blunt.

  I nodded. “Yeah, I did.” When I’d fallen in love with Alice it had been fast, hard, exciting. Everything I’d never experienced before.

  “Death is never easy. Especially for someone so young,” she said. “She was loved by you though and that was a gift that I know for a fact gave her joy.”

  The numbness came then. It always did. I’d realized it was the way my mind handled the rest. The details that all fell into place after . . . it was over. I couldn’t agree with Gran because although Alice had given me joy. Nothing had been real.

  “My greatest fear is I’ll always love her,” I admitted without even thinking about it.

  “That’s not something to fear, Eli. That’s something to accept. But your heart can always love her and the time you had with her and still one day love another. Just as strong. Just as hard.”

  Gran was never wrong. Until now. Giving someone the power to destroy me the way Alice had would always be an impossibility. That was how she’d ruined me.

  JUNE 12 / 8:30 AM

  Ophelia
Finlay

  I MAY HAVE gotten to sleep later this morning since Wednesday there were no dance classes in the summer, but it still took me awhile to adjust to doing things. I was on my second cup of coffee and thinking about going to the Club to get those red velvet waffles with cream cheese they had added to the breakfast menu last month. I was sure those waffles were well over a thousand calories, but I was in the mood to do something that made me smile. Eating was always one of those things.

  The fact I was sulking made me pathetic. I shouldn’t be sulking. Eli had a lot to do and he’d been staying with his grandmother the past two days. Of course, his first objective should be to get a place to live. Not come running here to see me. That would be ridiculous. We weren’t madly in love or anything.

  My mood went a little further south at that thought. I should be worried about myself. I was getting in too deep with him emotionally and it was all one-sided. That was bad. Very bad. It was never smart to be the one who cared the most. Especially with men.

  I slung back the rest of my coffee before it got cold and stood up. I was going to get the damn waffles. I would then put on my bikini and go out on the sandy white beach to soak up the sun. Forget all this silliness with liking Eli too much. I was overthinking it.

  The doorbell ringing confused me a moment. I stood there with my empty cup in hand frowning at the window before walking over to it. The way the instant giddiness came over me, my face burst into a grin and I ran to pick up my phone so I could open the app and tell Eli I would be right down should be more cause for concern. Instead I was too happy to give it more than a mini thought.

  “That’s not a face I was expecting,” I said as my app opened, and his face came into view from the camera on the doorbell that was connected to it.