All I Ever Wanted

by LuAnn McLane

  “And you.”

  “I should have been there for you,” she said, more to herself than to him.

  “Yeah. I won’t lie. I wish you had been.”

  Arabella closed her eyes, suddenly sad for the lost years. The pain that should have been put to rest. The secrets that should have been told.

  And yet Grady wrapped his arms tightly around her. “When Oliver went behind my back and hired you, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t reveal to you that I never stopped loving you. Thinking about you. And holy shit, you ruined me for any other girl,” he said with a weak chuckle. “No one even came close to what we shared.”

  “It was the same for me,” she said gruffly. “If that helps.”

  “You know something else? None of my brothers have ever really gotten serious with someone. I think the pain of losing Dad in the car crash and then Mom to lupus has made us afraid to love. Losing someone hurts like hell.”

  Arabella tilted her head up and nodded. “I know. My grandmother was my rock.”

  “So maybe we both need to stop being scared shitless and start over? Not waste any more time?”

  Arabella felt a little shot of fear slide down her spine. “Grady, I’ve got a life in LA. A business that I’ve worked hard to make a success.” Her pride wouldn’t allow her to tell him she was so close to losing it that she had to consider bringing Maxine Morgan on board.

  “Can’t you do like Oliver said and run your studios from anywhere?”

  “I like being hands-on,” she replied, avoiding the real issue.

  “I get it—that’s how I feel about Mom’s foundation. But maybe I need to give up some control too, so I can have more free time to do things I enjoy.”

  “And what would that be?”

  Grady tilted her chin up. “Being with you,” he said, and then kissed her. “We both know that this is more than . . . sex. And now that you know the truth . . .”

  “Grady . . .” Arabella shook her head, not knowing how to respond.

  As if sensing a crack in her armor, he pressed further. “I would say that you owe me that much, but I won’t go there,” he said with enough humor that Arabella had to give him a small smile.

  “But can you forgive me?” she asked, wishing she had the courage to tell him about the baby and her failing business, to have everything out in the open.

  “That’s what loving someone is all about. Forgiveness is the hardest thing, but the most important thing. Some people can’t apologize or even admit fault. You just did. And I forgive you. Saying ‘I’m sorry’ is every bit as important as saying ‘I love you.’ Sometimes even more. I might not ever completely understand why you fled, but the important thing is that you’re here now. We have a second chance, Arabella. Do you want to take it?”

  After a few heart-thudding moments she said, “I’m scared.”

  “Do you love me?”

  “Yes. I never stopped loving you.” She put her cheek against his chest and felt the reassuringly solid beat of his heart. When he kissed the top of her head she nearly burst into tears.

  “Do you want to know something else?”

  Bracing herself, Arabella nodded.

  “This beach house was built just for you. All your favorite colors, textures. Your favorite flowers. The giant bathtub. The wraparound porch. The ocean view that you said you always wanted.”

  “As soon as I walked in the door I fell in love with the house.”

  “And you didn’t have a clue?”

  “Yes, but I didn’t want to, Grady. I wanted to keep the walls up around me so you wouldn’t guess how much I still loved you. I couldn’t be hurt like that again.”

  “But now you know the truth,” he reiterated.

  She nodded.

  “I need more than just your love. I need your trust. If we start over I want to know that you believe in me. Trust in me. Know that I will never even think of cheating. The very word makes me cringe.”

  “I trust you, Grady.”

  “Then you’re willing to give us a second chance?”

  “Yes.” Arabella nodded. She felt joy enter her heart and laughed at Grady’s long sigh of relief.

  “There’s only one more thing I want to ask of you.”

  Arabella felt a little nervous at his question. The emotional roller coaster was making her feel breathless, scared, and giddy all at the same time. “Okay, go ahead.”

  “Can we have the day off tomorrow to celebrate? Spend the day doing whatever we feel like?”

  Relief flooded Arabella’s brain. “Yes! Go ahead and tell your brothers they get a much-deserved day of rest.”

  “Sweet!” Grady shouted, and then swept her off her feet.

  Arabella tipped her head back and laughed while he spun her around. She told herself that the past needed to stay where it belonged—behind her. There wasn’t any reason to let him know about the baby she’d lost. She’d only shared her secret with Granny York, and she couldn’t think of why Grady needed to know of the heartbreak that had taken her so long to get over. It was done, and although there would surely be rocky moments ahead, she hoped that this time around their love could conquer anything that life tossed at them.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  TREASURE

  Grady looked over to where Arabella was hunting for shells in the damp sand. Her hair was secured in a bouncy bun, but the breeze tugged strands free, teasing her cheeks. Until she’d come back to town, he’d taken the beauty of the beach for granted, but now everything seemed fresh and new. Bliss. It was such a fluffy word, but Grady couldn’t think of another way to describe his life over the past two weeks.

  Thanks to Arabella, Heartbeat danced like a well-oiled machine, and had even mastered a fedora-tumbling-down-the-arm move that had taken ten million tries to perfect. The preparations for the concert were taken care of down to the last details. At Arabella’s prompting, Grady finally had learned the beauty of delegating, handing over more of the tasks to Devin and his team. At this point, all Heartbeat basically had to do was show up onstage. Grady had even allowed his brothers to take over some of the operations of the foundation, giving him the opportunity to do what he loved best: spend time with Arabella.

  Grady gazed out over the ocean, which was choppy today, with rain in the forecast. Every day when he woke up at the beach house with her it was like a dream come true. Knowing she hated mornings, he had let her sleep while he brewed strong coffee with a touch of cinnamon and cooked breakfast before they headed out to the beach. He knew now without a doubt that he wanted her to be by his side for the rest of his life. And he wasn’t shy about telling her so, even though she would give him a shove and a smile, not committing to forever . . . yet. But he still had a few weeks and he planned to use the time well. He knew better than the average Joe how life could take a loved one away too soon.

  Not that Grady wasn’t scared. Giving Arabella the power to hurt him again wasn’t something he’d done without some trepidation. But now that she was back, his fear of not having her in his life trumped his fear of getting his heart broken again. He was also aware that he could be an example to his brothers to get out there and take a chance on love.

  Arabella laughed, drawing his attention.

  “The water is cold!” she shouted as the frothy tide swept over her bare feet. “And now my jeans are wet.” Turning her back to the ocean, she leaned over and rolled up the soggy bottoms.

  “I warned you not to get too close.”

  “I like living dangerously.”

  Grady saw another wave cresting, but before he could warn her, the cold water slapped against her legs. He laughed so hard at her squeal that he had to sit down in the soft, cool sand. “That was awesome,” he said as she ran away from the water toward him.

  Arabella raised her arms skyward. “Look at me! I’m soaked up to my thighs. My jean
s already feel crusty,” she complained as she flopped down beside him. She opened the palm of her hand and showed him a few perfect shells. “But it was worth it to get these little beauties.”

  “You do know that you live in a house overlooking the ocean? You can hunt for shells whenever your little heart desires. You don’t have to brave the cold water.”

  “I just can’t help myself. Shelling was one of my favorite pastimes with Granny York. She has a bunch of them displayed in a glass case in her house,” she said, but then frowned. “I need to get to Cincinnati soon before my dad sells it and gets rid of everything. Her attic is full of so many memories and treasures. Or at least they’re treasures to me. Mom wants me home for Christmas. I know it’s only October, but I need to start making plans.

  Grady pulled her sideways and kissed her. She didn’t know that her Christmas present was going to be her grandmother’s house. He’d asked her father to pretend that he hadn’t put the house on the market so it could be a surprise. The deed was going to be beneath the Christmas tree. Hopefully he’d convince her to stay after the concert, through the holidays and beyond. But, not wanting to break the spell, he’d refrained from asking anything too deep. For now, he just wanted to keep things easy and simple. “I think you need a sugar cookie fix from Thelma’s.”

  “I think you’re right.” She stood up and dusted sand from her butt. “And it’s meatloaf Monday at Daisy’s Diner. Let’s get takeout!”

  “Sounds like a plan,” Grady said. He loved that Arabella adored Main Street in Sea Breeze just as much as he did, and he looked forward to when they could spend more time exploring the shops.

  “Do not let me go into the candy store. I can’t resist the salted caramels and I’ll have to hide the candy from myself.”

  “Explain how you can hide something from yourself?”

  Arabella tossed her head back and laughed. “That’s the problem.”

  “God, I love that sound.”

  “Of the waves crashing against the shore?”

  “No, the sound of your laughter.” He pulled her close and captured her mouth in a tender kiss that quickly ignited the passion that always simmered beneath the surface when she was near him. The cool breeze blew her hair over her shoulders, caressing his cheeks. He threaded his fingers through the cinnamon silk and tugged her head back gently so he could kiss deeper, longer. His mouth trailed downward to the special place on her neck. Her pulse throbbed and her breath caught, letting him know she wanted him as much as he wanted her. He slipped a hand beneath her sweatshirt, feeling warm skin. She shivered beneath his touch.

  “Your hands are cold!” she said with a low laugh.

  “I can fix that.” Grady scooped her up in his arms and carried her to the beach house. Not his house, their house. He’d built the house while they were still a couple and had intended to surprise her after the world tour. She’d been on the deed from the beginning and he’d never changed it, even after she fled. Maybe he’d always had hope lingering in his heart. Even now it was difficult not to push for something lasting. Evidently patience wasn’t his strong suit.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Carrying you to bed.”

  “I thought we were going to the bakery.”

  “I need you first.” He carried her up the back steps leading to the massive deck.

  “Wait, let me take my jeans off! I don’t want to track sand into the house.”

  “I won’t ever complain about you taking off your clothes.” Grady let her slide suggestively against his body until her feet touched the wooden deck.

  Arabella laughed as she unzipped her jeans and shimmied out of them. God, she wore a tiny pink thong that revealed her gorgeous ass. “Wipe the sand from your feet.”

  “You’re a little bit bossy.”

  “And I like it.” She gave him a saucy grin. “I think I need to be in control for the rest of the night. Are you down with that?”

  “Your wish is my command, my lovely princess.” He gave her a little bow that made her laugh.

  “As it should be.”

  “Of course,” he said, and slid the door open for her to enter.

  “First, we shower off the sand.” She took his hand and led him toward the bedroom. “Showering with you is one of my favorite things to do. Of course, the list is growing.”

  Arabella tugged her sweatshirt off, revealing a hot pink bra with an enticing tiny bow in the center. The swell of her breasts rose above the satin, and with a flick of her fingers, she unhooked the front clasp, revealing her perfect breasts. With a little shoulder shimmy, the straps slid over her arms. She stood before him in nothing but the thong. Her hair was wild and windblown, and Grady knew he’d never seen anything as provocative in his entire life. He reached for her shoulders and turned her toward the big mirror.

  “What are you doing?” she asked in a breathless voice.

  “Showing you how damned gorgeous, how sexy you are.” He cupped her breasts, lifting the globes higher, and then rubbed his thumbs over her dusky pink nipples. With a groan, she leaned against his chest. He rubbed in circles until she gasped and bit her bottom lip.

  “H-how can you drive me wild with just your thumbs?”

  “My superpower,” he said into her ear. Her nearly naked ass pressed against his erection. He wanted to bend her over and take her right there as they watched themselves in the mirror, but tonight she was the boss. “What do you want, princess?”

  “I want you naked.”

  “You got it.” Grady quickly shed his clothes and stood next to her in front of the mirror. His cock jutted upward, swollen, eager to get down to business. If she even touched him. . . .

  And then she did.

  “Stand sideways and watch in the mirror.” She cupped his balls and then oh so slowly leaned toward his cock. He brushed her hair to the side so he could see what she was doing. Oh God . . . With the tip of her pink tongue she licked a light circle on his head, lapping up the pearly drop that appeared.

  “Arabella . . .” Grady said low in his throat, trying to warn her that he was hovering on the edge.

  “Mmm . . .” When she pulled back he breathed a sigh of relief, but then she put her tongue at the base of his shaft and licked all the way up and then back down.

  While. He. Watched.

  Grady braced one hand on the cool edge of the sink, trying not to explode. She licked again, and when she sucked his head into her warm mouth he threaded his fingers through her hair and moaned. He felt pleasure start to build, to rise. He wanted to close his eyes, but he needed to watch this erotic dance that had him rooted to the tile floor. He was nearly there . . . and then she stopped sucking and turned around.

  Arabella bent over, showing him the little patch of pink and the thread between her ass cheeks. “Hook your fingers in the sides and rip it off,” she commanded, and so he did. “Put your hands on my hips and take me from behind . . . and watch.”

  Dimly, he thought of a condom, but she’d explained some sort of app on her phone that indicated when she was fertile, and so he sank into her as far as he could go. He had to stop, gain control.

  She gasped. “Take me . . . fast. Hard. Watch.”

  Grady looked in the mirror. He had to grip her firmly to keep her steady. Breathing hard, he watched her breasts sway with each thrust, her ass quiver with the impact. The sound of skin slapping against skin, breathing, moans . . .

  And then an orgasm ripped through him and shot into her body.

  Grady held her hips tight and stayed buried so damned deep. After a moment, he looked at the erotic vision reflected in the mirror. His heart hammered in his chest while his dick continued to throb, pulse.

  “Pull out, and turn me around.” He knew she was trying for a commanding tone, but it was breathless. Still, he obeyed. He’d do whatever the hell she wanted. He would have done anything
she’d asked of him and more . . . always more.

  Turning to face the mirror, she stepped in front of him and went up on tiptoe. She reached up as high as she could and hooked her arms around his neck. “Make me go crazy with your fingers while we both watch.”

  Grady swallowed hard and could only nod. Have her naked body stretched upward waiting for his touch? All coherent words fled his brain. First, he lightly rolled her nipples between his index fingers and thumbs while she clung to his neck. She tilted her head to the side and her eyes fluttered shut. “Don’t forget to watch,” he whispered. He applied more pressure and then more until she whimpered and arched her body. When he pinched, she gasped. He knew where she wanted him caressing her the most, and she could issue the command, but she allowed the sensual torture. When he finally removed his fingers, he stared at her dusky nipples, pink, pointed from his touch. He kissed her neck while slowly sliding his hands down her body until one hand rested on the top of each thigh. He inched closer and closer.

  “Grady . . . I want—”

  “I know what you want,” he said, and, parting her folds, he dipped his middle finger into her silken heat. Sliding out, he moved in slow circles, lightly caressing, knowing from the hitch in her breathing that she was nearly there. Then he applied sudden pressure and watched in the mirror while her orgasm washed over her. Arching her hips, she pushed against his finger and then went rigid for a moment, gasping before crying out. Her hands slipped from his neck and he had to catch her, hold her when she went limp in his arms.

  They both uttered half sentences, stringing together words that had no meaning other than to communicate that they were both completely blown away.

  Grady wanted to lift her up but his own legs weren’t exactly steady. “Babe, I think we’ll have to settle for a bath. I can’t . . . can’t hardly stand.” Arabella’s husky laugh made him smile at her in the mirror. Their gazes met, held. “You turn me inside out,” he said, and meant it. When they were younger, they’d been uninhibited . . . wild, but this deep sensuality was on another level, unmatched by anything Grady could begin to imagine.