Finn’s howl still echoed in my heart, and I tried to forget it. I’d go back to him. He’d forgive me. He’d understand. He’d have to.
I got to my feet, my whole body hurting. I could crush them from here. I could just… enfold the entire house in earth and heavy clay, so they stopped breathing, the struggle to keep moving too hard as the world bore down on them.
Somehow, I couldn’t, though. As I stared at the house, it’s neatly manicured front lawn sprawling in front of it, I just… couldn’t. That seemed too cruel of a death, even after all they’d done to me.
I blinked away tears and tried to reach down again, call for the magic to just get the damn job done. Finn’s howl, though, kept ricocheting through my mind, distracting me and throwing me off my murder-game.
So I started walking, one step, then another, toward the place I’d called home but never truly felt at home in. With people who clearly wished I’d never been born in the first place. So out of place. So ground down.
I pushed through the brush that bordered the edge of the property, wet branches dripping rainwater down the back of my neck. It seeped into my t-shirt and left soaking swathes of fabric clinging to my body. A root reached up, grabbing my foot and tripped me, and I nearly went down, only to catch myself on a rough, spiny branch instead.
More water cascaded on me, the tree shaking its burden all over me. I bit my lip to keep from crying out at the sudden shower of cold. I kept my eyes on the house, its stone walls disinviting in the worst way. He was inside, and I was coming for him. Could he feel it? Did he know? Did his lich heart echo with fear at each beat the way mine did the closer I got to him?
Really, I was doing him a favour. I was completing the circle of life, bringing him back to the earth that he’d risen from. He should be thanking me.
A humourless smile twisted my lips as I pushed out of the trees and stood there.
Right. They were waiting, right inside, and all I had to do-
A figure stepped out onto the front portico, her dress white and fluttering to the ground. My mother. Sour acid tanged in my throat, and I froze. She looked… so young, fragile, her usually stern face softening as she turned toward me.
Ice crawled up my spine as her gaze settled on me like she’d known I was there all along. She smiled, her teeth white and venomous.
“Daughter,” she called, like I wasn’t standing there, soaked and filthy, and obviously come to murder everybody under the roof. “You return, as you should, alone?”
A breeze slicked over my wet skin.
She knew I was all by myself. How had I done this to myself again?
And this would be the last time, the dread spoke to me deep in my soul. My luck had run out. This was it. I’d thought I could do it on my own one too many times. I’d been trying to save the pack, keep them safe, but I’d trade them for me.
I’m sorry, Finn.
I wouldn’t be able to say it to him in person. He’d never know that I really was just that: so sorry for falling back down again, and again, for taking the same path, for making the same wrong choice.
A gentle, twisting sound rose around me, and I glanced down at the first touch on my ankles. Vines, hundreds of them, reached for me. I cried out and jumped straight up in the air, but they shot forward to catch me, winding around my legs, ankles-to-thigh. I reached down to grab at one, and my wrist fell victim.
“There’s no need to fight,” my mother said, walking toward me. She was barefoot, I noticed, and the grass grew in front of her, thick and vibrant, with each step she took. When had she gotten so powerful? The vines were flowering as they curled around me, immobilizing me slowly. The panic grew simultaneously, swelling to fill every inch of my body, and I struggled, fighting the plants and her magic as she grew closer and closer.
That’s when I saw it.
Her teeth were cracked, blackened at the edges, like- something had exploded in her mouth. Bile was in the back of my throat, and I would have vomited when she lifted her gaze to meet mine, her eyeballs bloody in the whites. She looked so young, but at the same time, so wrong. Something had happened to her, but I had no idea what. Instead of vomiting when she reached for me, her fingernails blackened at the tips, a vine curled around my face, gagging me and biting into my flesh as it held me still. She stroked my cheek with the back of her hand, her skin paper-dry and scratchy.
The youth was an illusion. I could see that now that she was close, the rouge painted on her lips and thick layers of powder makeup to make her skin seem porcelain and wrinkle-free.
But it was there, just under the surface.
“I’m so pleased,” she said, her voice thready and gauze-light. “You’ve arrived just in time to celebrate.”
Those words struck abject terror into my heart, and I bit down hard into the vine gagging me, the sweet viscous liquid instantly filling my mouth. I had to breathe through my nose to keep from choking, sweat breaking out all over my body.
I closed my eyes, tried to calm, and twisted, the magic inside of me trembling and barely answering me. My heart was beating too fast; it was all too much. In the space of minutes, I had completely and utterly fucked myself.
She flipped her hand over, nails raking over my cheek, leaving painful furrows as I cried out around the mouthful of plant… jizz or whatever it was. She smirked.
“There,” she said, ”looks prettier that way.” She turned away from me and began walking. The vines squirmed and then surged forward, following her and dragging me along, my feet scraping over the ground as they pulled me. “Your father won’t be pleased, but he’s never been the one to be grateful over a little family reunion.”
We were getting closer to the front door, it’s graceful and imposing arches terrifying me. I was trying to go transparent, pull the earth up to shred the plants, anything, but my magic was beyond me, slippery and unknowable. It was barely an echo.
It wouldn’t save me. Not then.
“Ah,” She said, “she’s here.” I glanced up. He stood in the doorway, twisted, his skin gray and dark. I jerked back as far as the plants would let me, internally screaming. His eyes were black pools of nothing as he gazed at me, pupil-less and inky. “The prodigal daughter has returned.”
His gaze laid on me, heavy and oppressive, for far too long. My breaths were shallow through my nose, the liquid in my mouth turning sour and bitter with every passing second.
“Release her,” he muttered, “and show her into my study. We must… speak.” He melted into the shadows, back into the house. My mother turned to me, a smile on her creasing face.
“Well, that went better than I expected,” she said, “Now, don’t squirm. This won’t hurt a bit,” she promised, reaching for me.
I didn’t believe her, not for a second.
Nineteen
The plan unfolded in my mind the second I stumbled into the study, winded, my mouth still stinging from the plant’s spa after I’d spit it on the floor.
“Classy,” my mother had said before sneering at me. I shuddered and glared at her. Vines trailed my feet, a silent green threat. Make one wrong move, and we’ll end you. Bind you, choke you.
Too bad they had no idea what was inside me now, the power I could harness if I had the strength to do it. I was shaky but determined.
Across the room, my father stood, his skin ashen, his eyes sunken, like they were ready to melt right out of his face at any moment.
“I would say it’s a pleasure,” I couldn’t help the bored, combative tone from creeping into my voice. He laughed, flicked his fingers, and the doors behind me slammed shut, the lock ticking into place. I glanced down. The vines writhed, cut off by the doors before they went still.
Even in needing my mother’s help to contain me, he couldn’t stop being cruel to anything or anyone.
“How’d she do it?” I ask. “She’s never been this powerful, not in all the time I’ve known her.” I crossed my arms over my chest, searching inside of me for the shaky, barely-there wisp of
power. That was the plan. I’d open the earth up under him, a gaping maw, and swallow him whole. My whole body felt like one giant bruise, though, and I wasn’t sure how I could do it, or if I could do it. I just needed time, a little bit of it, to rest my muscles.
“She has proven herself to me, through dedication, and giving me daughters that I…” He paused and glanced at me, his lips curving. “I suppose in a way, I could say I am proud of you. You have accomplished more than I ever thought you have. Such wanton destruction. It is… delicious. Do you know how many lives you killed? It is better that I stripped your powers; you were becoming above yourself.” Each word he said made a flare of something inside me spike higher, and an intense feeling of heat growing under my breast bone.
“What did you do to her?” I demanded.
“I gave her some of her powers back,” he said lightly, “it is my right to gift such a thing, from time to time, as the headship of this house, of master of all that remains in it.” He gave me such a look that I knew what he was thinking.
“I have not remained,” I snapped.
“And what are you now, daughter? All alone and ready for me to take you back into the fold?” My father walked toward me slowly, leaned over me, a smile cracking across his face. I could see it close up now, how death had stolen all the colour from his skin, and his wrinkles were lined with hints of red. Was that the hellfire, eating him from the inside-out? My breath stuttered in my chest.
“You shouldn’t be alive,” I said, “and there’s no way you’re going to take me back, not now.”
“As if we would have you,” he laughed, his body bending back, flexibility he should have never had as his spine twisted into a U-shape. I scrambled away from him, my skin on fire with goosebumps all over. I should’ve regretted my decision to come on my own, but I was desperately grateful that the guys weren’t here.
My father was wrong. He was twisted, and even in how broken he was, he was so very dangerous. I stepped back toward the door, trying to find the energy to stare him down. My father’s laughter died on his dry lips, and he frowned at me.
“Why do you look so pleased with yourself?” He asked. “Don’t you know, I have already replaced you.” He smirked and gestured to the grand stairwell behind him. I knew the stairs so well, having climbed them hundreds, possibly tens of thousands of times in my life. “She sleeps, waiting for the transfer later today, and then the circle will be complete, and no more will Darcy Llewellyn be a smear upon this family’s name and legacy.”
“What the fuck are you talking about, old man?” I asked, “I’m just here to finish what Max started, and if you think for a second I give two shits about being a smear or whatever on this family, you’re not looking closely at yourself.”
I pulled at it, the dark, earthen magic inside of me. It shuddered, stuttering in my chest, waking up slowly, not wanting to obey. My soul was tired, and it wanted to sleep. Now was not the time, though.
My father’s eyes narrowed, and he let out a guttural laugh as the ground under us rumbled.
“You would threaten the babe that your sister bore for this family? She is innocent and pure, and you would kill her while she sleeps? Only a few weeks old, and her aunt would rip her life-force right from her?” He pointed at me. “The curse upon you would last generations of your spawn’s time, and woe betide your half-bred offspring what would happen to them.”
I choked for a second.
“You have my sister and her baby here?” I glanced up the stairs, trying to fathom how insane dying had made my father. “You knew I was coming for you. Maybe it’s not me putting them in danger, but you-” I tried to harden my heart against the idea of bringing the roof down around my father’s ears and hurting my newborn niece in the process.
She can’t matter… the pack has to come first…
I tried not to think about what Finn or Cash would say about a pup being killed as collateral damage. Eli would be furious, Ace would be heartbroken. Charlie would just look at me like he did, like I was hollow, and he could see through me.
And could I ever look at myself the same way, either? I blinked away my feelings and swallowed, glaring at my father.
“You’re a real fucker,” I hissed and lifted my foot from the ground an inch. There it was, the cache of energy inside me, ready to spring. Finally, when I brought it back down, the earth vibrated under us, and my father jerked back, looking alarmed and offended.
“What’s this?” He snarled. “You dare play with magics beyond your control? That you have no right to wield?”
“Oh, go fuck yourself,” I said and stomped again, shuddering along with the planet as the house jolted, the floor rippling toward him. Granite tiles jerked and cracked, the walls of the house groaning from deep within. My stomach felt sick as panic flashed over my father’s face.
He was not my father anymore. He’d relinquished that title when I’d yanked it from him, the first time I’d run from this godforsaken hellholes.
And now would be the last. The very last.
“You will not rend us,” he whispered, his voice trailing upward to end in a shriek. He clapped his hands together, and a bolt of lightning flew toward me. In a hot panic, my fingers jerked upward, earth following their path, a wall of dirt climbing out from underneath the tiles. Dust flew, spraying in all directions as the spear of energy struck my shield, sparing me and buying me another second. I turned and ran at the doors, every step I took making the ground under me shake and roll.
A roar erupted behind me, ripped from my father’s throat, the rage in it bringing back shivering memories of his anger when I was younger and failed him.
Lightning curved through my vision, spinning in front of me- he wanted me to see death coming. I dropped to the ground as the marble tiles rose to defend me, the ground underneath pushing them up. The crackle soared over my head, my hair on my arms standing on end. The bolt hit the ground, the percussive slam of it rocking me where I hid. I scrambled to my feet, turning on my father, breath catching in my throat.
“Your grand-daughter is upstairs,” I yelled at him, my power flying out, frantic, rising panel after panel of solid dirt around him, doing what I could contain his powers. I wasn’t sure I could dodge another hit like that. He cursed at me from behind the earthen walls, their tops uneven and jagged. My eyes widened; his fingers wrapped around the top of one, and slowly he emerged, his hair flowing around him as a breeze picked up, impossible inside the house, but-
I turned and ran, crossing my arms in front of my face. The doors were closed, but they wrenched apart, stone pushing up from underneath to make space for me. I squirmed through the opening, only a foot wide, and skidded to a stop outside in the grand hallway.
Instantly vines were on me, shooting toward me in all directions. I glanced up.
My mother stood there, plants wrapped around her from ankle to thigh, their green tendrils glowing. Her eyes were shadowed as well, glinting green at the distance of twenty feet from me.
“Mom, stop,” I begged as the house shook, my powers answering the panicked call inside my heart. “She’s-”
The ceiling cracked, the floor rolling in waves, and I fell, my mother, hitting the tile seconds after I did. She shrieked, and it was like the magic inside of me was being pulled out. It had a mind of its own, and its only goal was to defend me.
And it’d bring the whole house down on us to do it. Getting to my feet hurt, and I could barely walk on the shaking ground, not wanting to relive being buried alive twice in one week.
My mother was laying still, curled, her vines withering at my feet as I walked toward her, picking my way across the floor. What had made her so still, I had no idea. Cautiously I stepped toward her, avoiding the cracks in
A dull creaking made me turn, eyes wide. Hands were prying apart the doors to my father’s office, his hands, dripping what looked like oily, black sludge.
It was his blood. The scent hit me, iron and decay, like a slap.
A cry a
bove made me look. My sister, at the top of the stairs and dressed in a dusty, stained nightgown, a tiny bundle in her arms, was staring down at us, her expression wretched.
“Mother,” she called, her voice shrill and panicked. Ahead of me, my mother’s body, her head lolling to one side, her neck at an odd angle, started to move. She got to her feet, her movements jerky and uncomfortable- I nearly vomited when I saw it. A jagged spear of rock embedded in her stomach, the blood caking her clothes to her body, and her eyes. I stumbled back.
They were black, dripping the same oily sludge as my father’s fingers.
I turned as my voice screamed, echoing through the hall, to my sister, the last sane member of my family-
“RUN!!!” Whatever had my parents in their undead grip was spreading, the shadows sprawling out from them. I bolted up the stairs, getting to the top of it before I could even think, wrapping one hand around my sister’s upper arm and yanked. She cried out and stood still, staring at me, like I was the one who was undead and monstrous. “Run,” I begged her, “come on, please!” The house rocked again, and she shivered before shaking her head, turning away from me to run down the stairs.
A noise of hysterical terror tore out of my throat, and I ran after her, the instinct to protect taking over.
I felt it before I saw it. The electric current humming through the air, rising in every atom and ion. My hair slowly lifted, floating around me, and I shuddered. I came to the top of the stairs, only to see my sister facing down my father, blossoming vines, small shrubs, growing all around her, grass sprouting along the ground where it should’ve found no purchase. Our mother dragged herself closer and closer to my sister, still holding her child tight to her chest.
The infant made no noise, and my heartbeat blotted out any other sound, just as my sister sent a volley of vines toward our father, his steps uneven and heavy. He grunted as they hit him square in the chest, staggering back before the lightning came.
It was a rain of it.
It slammed into the roof, cracking open the tiles, raining wood and plaster down on us. I fell to my knees, curling my arms over my head, as the roar of the building pulling apart around me became deafening. I reached for my power, to try and turn the world translucent, for one last-ditch attempt at protecting myself-
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