But we were both honest and truthful in what we each said.
Simon explained that after he left my mom, he’d tried everything he could to get custody of both Jolie and me. When that failed, he tried to keep some kind of contact with us, but my mother being the complete and utter self-obsessed narcissus that she was, blocked him at every turn.
He said when he received the letter than I was supposed to have written, he got very drunk, and remained that way for about six months. He said that he even considered ending his life at one point, but a letter from Sylvie arrived with pictures of Jolie and me, and in that moment, he knew he needed to pull his life back together, so that if the day ever came when one of us came looking for him; he would be someone we might be proud to call dad again.
He also said that the night Jolie was beaten up, Sylvie called him, and he went straight to the hospital but when he got there, my mother was there too, and once more she refused to let him speak to Jolie. She had security remove him from the hospital.
He said at that point, he’d almost given up hope that he would ever be allowed to be part of our lives once more.
He explained that he never remarried because he didn’t want it to seem like he’d moved on with his life if we ever did come to look for him. This made me sad. He’d lived his life in a kind of limbo, waiting for the family he wasn’t sure he would ever be a part of again.
When I left that night, I promised that I would keep in touch, but then two days later he showed up at my office and asked me to join him for lunch.
Again, I found him easy to talk to. I smiled as he reminisced about our childhood before he had left, but something was bothering me. In all his stories and questions, he’d barely mentioned Jolie.
“Dad,” I said as I set my knife and fork down. “Why don’t you talk about Jolie?”
“Well,” he began, and I knew he was nervous. “Did you know that over the years, I would drive to Pullman from time to time, and I would sit in my car and watch you both from afar. The one thing that always struck me was, how you cared for her. She was always with you, always tagging along behind you, and I could see just how protective you are about her.”
“But what has that got to do with anything?” I asked, not really following where he was going with this.
“Seth, I enjoyed the other night,” he said, giving me a smile, and I had no clue what he was going to say next. “And today has been amazing too. I am so happy you’re giving me the chance to get to know you again…”
“But why not Jolie?” I asked stopping him mid-sentence, a feeling of dread forming in the pit of my stomach. “Is this because of what Liz said?”
“God, no,” he replied, looking almost surprised that I would even think that. “I know that Liz lied about Jolie. Like I said, I know in my heart that she is my daughter.”
“Then why don’t you talk about her?” I asked, still confused by his behaviour.
“Like I said, I have enjoyed getting to know you again,” Simon continued. “But I know you still don’t trust me. Why would you, you don’t really know me.”
“I’m trying,” I replied, wishing I could tell him that he was wrong.
“I know,” he smiled. “Just like I know that if you don’t trust me, there is no way you will let me back into Jolie’s life until you do.”
“You…you want to be part of her life?” I asked, giving him a questioning look.
“I want to be part of both of your lives,” Simon replied, his smile widening. “Seth, you’re my son and I have never stopped loving you.”
“I never stopped loving you either,” I whispered as I tried to keep my emotions in check. “Yes, I was angry with you, and yes, there were days I even hated you. But I never stopped loving you.”
“Then, do you think we can be a family again?” Simon asked as he gave me a hopeful smile. “All of us?”
“We already are a family,” I replied, returning his smile, finally feeling like I had found myself again.
Calling Sylvie was harder than I thought it would be. I knew she thought of us are her kids, and we were. We always would be. But we were also Simon’s kids, and he wanted a chance to get to know his family once again.
Still, I knew I needed to talk to her before I even talked to Jolie. I was sure she would have so many reservations, but to my surprise, she seemed really happy that I had found Simon again.
Simon was right. Part of me was worried that it might be too soon for him to meet Jolie. But Sylvie said that just because he wasn’t always in our life, doesn’t mean we weren’t always in his.
So, I told her I would come to talk to Jolie.
It was my first time back in Pullman since I left a week earlier. I thought it would have been easy to come back here, but it was anything but. As I drove through the town, I found myself searching for Savannah, hoping that maybe I would see her, and finally get a chance to talk to her. But of course, I didn’t.
By the time I reached Sylvie’s, my heart hurt and so did my head.
But I had come to Pullman for another reason. So, for right now, I needed to push Savannah from my mind and focus on talking to Jolie.
Releasing a long, tired breath, I pushed open the door and climbed from the car. I was only halfway up the driveway, when Jolie came rushing out the door and down the front steps.
“SETH!” She yelled as she ran towards me, then launched herself at me, wrapping her arms and legs around me, almost knocking me over. “Sylvie didn’t say you were coming.”
“I thought I would surprise you,” I said, hugging her tightly, before I set her down. “Besides, I promised I would come back to visit, didn’t I.”
“You did,” she beamed at me, as she linked arms with me as we headed back towards the house. “Have you talked to Sav?”
“I haven’t,” I replied, wishing that I could have given her the answer that she wanted to hear. “But she isn’t why I’m here. You are.”
“Oh!” She said, giving me a questioning look.
“Come inside,” I said as we walked up the front steps. “I need to talk to you about something important.”
“Okay,” she said, giving me a worried look. “Sylvie is inside baking. She is going to be happy to see you.”
I followed her into the house, knowing that what I was about to tell her, could change her life completely.
“Will I have to go to live with him?” Jolie asked, giving Sylvie a worried look.
“What?” Sylvie said, giving her a warm smile. “Of course you don’t have to go live with him, Jolie. This is your home. This will always be your home.”
“But he wants to see me?” She asked, returning her focus to me. “He wants to come here and meet me?”
“He would like to, yes,” I replied, knowing that this was a lot for her to take in. If I was honest, I was still trying to get my head around the fact our dad was back in our lives after all these years. “He would like to see you very much, but Jo, you know you don’t have to meet him if you don’t want to. You don’t ever have to do anything that you don’t want to.”
“Have you seen him?” She asked, giving me a curious look. I knew she was curious and afraid in equal measures. “What is he like?”
“He is… he is exactly how I remember him,” I replied with a smile. “He lives in Pomeroy. He isn’t married, nor does he have any other kids. He seems… he seems like a good man, Jo. I think you will like him.”
“But what about what Mom said,” she asked, clearly still worried by the poison Liz filled her mind with.
“It’s not true, Jolie,” I assured her. “I don’t know why Liz would have lied like she did, but nothing she said was ever true. In fact, now that I am looking at you, you actually look like him. You have the same blue eyes, and the same smile.”
“Really?” She asked, giving me a genuine smile.
“If you need time to think about this, Jo,” I said, realising maybe she just needed more time. “You don’t have to decide today.
&
nbsp; “What do you think?” She asked Sylvie as she turned and looked at her.
“Sweetheart, this is something you have to decide for yourself,” Sylvie said, reaching out, taking hold of her hand. “But if this is something you want; Seth and I will be with you every step of the way.
“What’s going on?” Jared’s voice said suddenly from the doorway into the kitchen, surprising all three of us. I turned and looked at my friend. He just glared at me for a moment, before he looked at his mother and then Jolie.
“Seth found our Dad,” Jolie said, giving him a broad smile, before she glanced at me. “Seth said he wants to see me.”
“That’s great news, Jo,” Jared replied, still standing by the door. He glanced at me once more, but again, he quickly looked away. “You must be pretty excited.”
“I guess,” she shrugged, glancing from him to me once more.
I knew she hated that Jared and I weren’t talking anymore. If I was honest, I hated it too.
I missed my best friend almost as much as I missed Savannah. I had thought about calling him several times over the last couple of weeks too, but if I was honest, I really didn’t know what to say to him.
“Do you want some coffee and cake?” Sylvie asked, standing up from where she was sitting next to Jolie. “I’ve just made a fresh pot.”
“I’m good,” Jared replied. “I just dropped by to get that new order book you said you had here. I got a call before I closed the store, but I didn’t have the proper order form, so I need to write it out properly.”
“It’s in the office,” Sylvie said, giving him a look that I knew all too well. She wanted him to make an effort with me and clear the air. It was a look I had seen myself many times over the years when Jared and I would fall out when we were growing up.”
“I’ll go get it,” he said, completely ignoring the look, before he turned and walked back across the hallway.
“Lord, what am I going to do with that boy?” She asked with a sigh as she sat back down at the table.
“Maybe Seth could try talking to him,” Jolie shrugged, giving me a pleading look.
“I don’t think Jared is ready to talk to me yet, Jo,” I said, giving her a smile, before I glanced at Sylvie. I knew she wanted us to sort things out, but I knew Jared wasn’t there yet, and I didn’t really fancy another smack in the mouth.
“He’ll come around, Sweetheart,” Sylvie said, giving me a sad smile.
“Yeah,” I said as I pushed up from the chair, before turning back to Jolie. “I think maybe it’s time I was hitting the road.”
“You’re leaving?” Jolie asked, giving me an unhappy look. “But you just got here. You should stay for dinner…”
“Jo,” I said pulling her to me, kissing her softly on the forehead. “It’s okay. I’ll be back.”
“But I don’t want you to go now,” she said as tears danced in her eyes.
“I know,” I sighed, wishing I could give her the answer she wanted. “But this is Jared’s home. I need to give him a little bit of space.”
“This is so stupid,” Jolie cried as she pulled away from me. “And so unfair.”
Before I could answer, she stormed out of the room, leaving me standing there with Sylvie.
“She’s right you know,” Sylvie said, giving me a sad smile. “This is your home too, Seth. You don’t have to leave.”
“I think it’s the right thing to do,” I smiled, wishing that things didn’t have to be so messed up. “I will call you later. Maybe when she calms down, you can talk to her again about Dad.”
“I will,” Sylvie said as she walked to me, then kissed me on the cheek. “Promise me that you won’t be a stranger in this house. This is your home and your family. You belong here too.”
“I promise,” I replied as I kissed her back on her cheek.
With one last smile, I turned and headed for the hallway. As I walked out of the kitchen, Jared walked out of the office, but he stopped the moment he saw me.
“It’s okay,” I said as I continued towards the door. “I’m leaving.”
I didn’t wait for a reply. Instead, I headed out the front door, and down the front steps. Suddenly I needed to get away from the house and from Pullman as fast as I possibly could.
“Seth!” Jared called from the door of the house, just as I reached the door of my car.
Shit! I thought to myself. The last thing I needed right at that moment was another punch in the face from Jared. I released a deep breath as I turned around to face him.
“Jared, if you are going to tell me how much of a shitty friend I am,” I said, watching him as he stomped down off the front porch, heading directly towards me. “Save your breath. I already got the memo, and the thick lip to go with it. I’m leaving, so just let it go.”
I turned back to the car and pulled the door open.
“You really are a stupid asshole,” he hissed as he reached me, and grabbed my arm. “You’re just going to run again?”
“I would have thought you would have been happy to see the back of me,” I sighed, really not wanting to fight with my best friend. “I only came here to see Jo.”
I pulled my arm free and turned back to the car once more.
“And what about, Sav?” He asked, surprising me with his question. “Do you think she’s happy to see the back of you too?”
“Savannah and I are over,” I sighed, realising he was not going to let this go that easy. “She doesn’t want anything to do with me, so you get to live happily ever after with Callie, and the baby. You win. Congratulations to you!”
“Wow,” he replied with a sarcastic laugh, surprising me once again. “You really do love to play the victim, don’t you, Seth?”
“What the fuck are you talking about now?” I asked, giving him a questioning look.
“So, your father left, and your mom’s a drunk,” he said, stunning me with his bluntness. “Boo-fucking-hoo. At least you had a father. I never even met mine, but did I grow up with a chip on my shoulder about it. Then there was that skank Ashley. So, she fucked someone else and broke your heart. Well at least it wasn’t your best friend she was fucking.”
“You don’t talk about Savannah like that,” I growled as I squared up to him. “She is nothing like Ashley, and you were no boy scout either if memory serves me right.”
“I never said I was perfect, Seth,” Jared replied, but this time his tone was less angry. “But you’re not perfect either. You run when the going gets tough.”
“I left because I thought it would be better for everyone,” I replied, completely thrown by his comment. “You hated me. Savannah said she didn’t want to see me ever again, and the stupid part of it was, she was angry at me, because I loved you too damn much to tell her that you were a lying, cheating scumbag.”
Jared grabbed me and shoved me against the car.
“And yet I am still not the one that broke her heart,” Jared said, glaring into my eyes. “She was angry and needed some time, but you couldn’t give her that time. Instead you did what you do best. You ran.”
“I left because it was the right thing to do,” I sighed, realising how stupid this all seemed now.
“Right for who, Seth?” Jared asked, releasing me from his grip, just as I noticed Sylvie and Jolie on the porch. “Not for Jolie. She is a mess and she needed her brother to be here. Not for Mom, she has loved you all your life, and you just left her too. Not for me. My life is spinning out of control. I am going to be a father, and I’m so fucking terrified. I need my best friend back…”
“Jared,” I said, as hot tears stung my eyes.
“And not for Sav,” he finally said, as tears danced in his eyes too. “She loves you so much, and you just left her without even saying goodbye.”
“I tried…” I whispered as tears finally broke free and trickled down my face.
“Well, you didn’t try hard enough,” he sighed as he blinked back tears too. “And now she is leaving Pullman.”
“She’s
leaving?” I asked, understanding finally just how much I had made a mess of everything.
“I stopped by yesterday to talk to her,” Jared explained. “No one had heard from her, and they were worried. Needless to say, she wasn’t exactly thrilled to see me, but I saw the boxes. She said that you left her, and that staying here was just too hard.”
“Did… did she say when she was going?” I asked hoping that maybe there was still a chance I could talk to her and make her see just how much I loved her.
“No,” he shook his head. “But if I were you, I would pull my head out of my damn ass and go talk to her before you really do lose her forever.”
I looked at him for a moment, as a smile slowly spread across his face.
“Now get out of here, Loser,” he said as his smile widened. “Before it’s too late.”
“Okay, Asshole,” I replied, smiling too.
And like that, I had my friend back. Now I just needed to find my girl and win her back too.
Chapter 26
Seth
As I drove the twenty minutes to Savannah’s house, a tiny flicker of hope sparked inside me, but so did the feeling of unbelievable sadness. She thought I had left without saying goodbye. I had broken her heart completely and utterly, and I wondered if I could somehow make her see that I never meant to hurt her.
In my heart I believed that leaving was the right thing to do, but now, looking back, I realised it was probably the biggest mistake of my life. Now, I just needed to make Savannah see that I loved her and that I would never, ever let her down again.
I pulled my car to a stop outside Savannah’s apartment building, switched off the engine and released a long, calming breath. I had no clue what I was going to say to her, but I knew that this time, I would not let her walk away from me so easily again.
I thought about what Jared had said once again. How had I been so stupid to just leave without trying harder to make things right between us. I knew I needed to dig deep and try find the words to tell Savannah how I really felt about her.
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