Our Kind of Love

by Victoria Purman

  Anna regarded her patient, envied her glow as she relaxed back on to the sofa, linking her fingers under the small curve of her belly. Anna still marvelled at how pregnant women, even early on when they were still wearing their pre-pregnancy jeans, seemed to have a sixth sense about protecting and nurturing their bumps, as if they were hugging their babies from the outside in.

  ‘I know I will.’ Julia smiled warmly and then Anna could see a question in her eyes. ‘What about you Anna? Do you want kids one day?’

  Anna felt a tug inside and hesitated. It was a simple enough question, especially from one woman to another, but she felt uncomfortable. If she answered it the conversation would head into personal territory that was still too raw. While part of her was desperate to talk about what had happened, the other part – the one that was interested in her self-preservation – wanted to leave it shut off, hidden away. Answering that question meant giving away so much more and Anna wasn’t ready for it.

  ‘Now? That would take an immaculate conception.’ Anna rolled her eyes to hint that it wasn’t painful to talk about. She sat back on the sofa, feeling enveloped by the warmth of the sun and the softness of the leather. ‘We were pretty obsessed with our careers. Alex and me. I don’t know it if would ever have happened for us.’ That was all that needed to be said.

  ‘Look at me.’ Julia smiled. ‘It was never part of my plan, either. Absolutely definitely didn’t want any. Until I came home and was reunited with Ry and surrounded by home and all this … and then I did. The change was so sudden, almost overnight. It was as if a light bulb went off in my head and flicked those hormones into raging overdrive. Now look at me.’

  ‘Now look at you.’ Happy, Anna thought. Julia simply looks happy. It was such a simple thing to wish for yourself. Anna wondered what happy would feel like in this new life she was navigating. And when would she feel it? Would she be aware of the very moment she finally felt happy again or would she only know it in retrospect?

  ‘Do you like coming from a big family, Anna?’

  This was much safer ground and Anna could relax just a bit. ‘It’s wonderful.

  ‘And your parents. Are they still both around?’

  Anna nodded. ‘Both are still fit and healthy, retired and loving it. Which gives them lots of energy to nag me. And we still have my Nonna, mum’s mum.’

  Julia was wide-eyed. ‘All that family, I can’t imagine. I’m an only child. And an orphan.’ Julia sighed, her voice hitching as she said it. ‘Tell me about it? What was it like growing up with a family that big?’

  Anna shifted, made herself more comfortable. She toed off her shoes and tucked one leg under her butt. ‘Where I grew up, you can’t throw a stone without hitting someone from southern Italy. I went to the local Catholic school with four of my cousins and I’ve spent the rest of my life surrounded by aunties and uncles and godparents and my Nonno and Nonna. Until my Nonno on my mum’s side died two years ago. It’s impossible to get into any trouble with boys when so many cousins are watching every move you make.’

  ‘It must have been amazing to be surrounded by so much love.’

  Anna considered Julia’s question. ‘Most of the time, it’s great. Really. When you’re a teenager, there’s always an engagement of a wedding or a christening to go to and each one came with a new dress. But sometimes … sometimes it’s too much.’

  Sometimes it didn’t feel like love. It felt like being smothered. All that attention was cloying and overbearing and sometimes Anna needed to escape from the probing and the kissing and the questions and the scrutinising observations. She usually did that, in small doses, with loud music and singing at the top of her lungs when she was driving in her car. Sometimes that was enough. But lately it hadn’t been nearly as satisfying an escape. She’d been feeling hemmed in, controlled, as taut as a high wire and just as shaky. Her family had been hovering and it felt like being smothered. That’s why she’d jumped at the offer of a weekend with Ry and Julia at Middle Point. She’d driven down earlier that day, Easter Friday, to spend four whole days of sun and long walks and a swim if the weather was warm enough. Dinners and laughs and wine.

  And Joe? She could deal with Joe if she had to. Two broken-hearted people who found each other one night and had scratched an itch. Knowing that’s all it was made being in Middle Point that much easier. So what if she’d been thinking about him just a little. He was handsome and funny and it was only natural. She met men like him every day. Well, almost every day. Okay … never. But it was what it was, and it was over. A one-time thing.

  ‘Thanks for letting me stay this weekend, Julia. I’ve really been looking forward to it.’

  Julia lifted her feet to rest them on the coffee table. ‘Dan and Lizzie mentioned the idea a few weeks ago and I thought maybe you could kill two birds with one stone – check me over and spend Easter down here with us. The weather is going to be stunning. And, don’t take this the wrong way, but you look like you could do with some rest yourself.’

  Anna relaxed next to Julia. ‘You’re right. It’s been a tough few months.’

  ‘Of course it has.’ Julia found her hand and gave it a squeeze.

  ‘It’s funny,’ Anna said. ‘I seem to have no trouble prescribing it to my patients, but when it comes to me? Not so easy.’

  ‘What’s the expression … physician heal thyself?’

  Anna snorted. ‘If only.’

  ‘Anna, take it from someone who used to work as hard as you do. I understand why you do it. I was driven too. But sometimes you need to get off that roller-coaster. It’s not good for the soul to be working so hard. You need to get out there,’ Julia nodded towards the beach. ‘Breathe some fresh air. It’ll help you sleep and do wonders for your blood pressure.’

  Anna narrowed her eyes. ‘Hey, who’s the doctor here?’

  ‘Let us look after you. Don’t worry about a thing. Four days of rest down here without a care in the world and you’ll be a whole new woman.’

  A whole new woman? There was a thought. Anna so much wanted to slip in to the easy patterns of Middle Point. She needed to. She’d been hanging on by a slim thread for months, working more and more hours at the surgery to fill her days, doing anything to avoid going home to an empty house. And now here she was, in the late afternoon of the Thursday before Easter, with a whole weekend to relax and not think about work or her patients. One month before, when Grace had asked for the same days off to go to a wedding in Melbourne, Anna had made a quick decision to close up the practice. For years and years she’d seen patients on the Saturday morning of the Easter weekend, but not this year. She didn’t have any clue four weeks ago what she’d do until the invitation came from Julia and Ry. It wasn’t hard to say yes to the idea of a weekend away.

  Her thoughts turned once again to Joe. She was way too tired to go over what had happened between them … and as the warmth of the afternoon sun relaxed her to the point of way beyond caring, she realised she was way too tired to think about anything, way too tired to even keep her eyes open …

  ‘I don’t normally do this,’ Anna breathed, pulling herself reluctantly from Joe’s arms. She wasn’t quite sure where she was, and why she’d thrown her natural suspicion and caution to the wind and let him lead the way when they’d left the wedding reception a few minutes before. She couldn’t make out anything in particular in the room because it was still dark and they hadn’t wasted time looking for a light switch. Oh, but there was a bed, that she was sure of. They’d stumbled into the room, their hands and arms and mouths fully occupied with tasting, touching and exploring. She felt a cool breeze on her back and guessed there must be an open window. Were they goose bumps from the wind or simply they from the realisation that she was about to have sex with a man she’d picked up at a wedding?

  The most important part of that sentence? She was about to have sex.

  And she was about to burst from the thrill of it all. Anna found the straps of her clinging red dress and dragged them over her sho
ulders, shimmying out of it in a frustrated wiggle, until it hit the floor. She needed to get naked and she needed Joe to be naked too.

  When she looked up at him, he’d stopped, frozen, all the frenzied activity of the past ten minutes stilled.

  ‘Don’t you dare tell me you’ve changed your mind,’ she demanded, her hands in fists at her hips.

  ‘Nuh uh,’ he muttered with a grin that she could see in the dark. He was taking in every inch of her and it sent a thrill right to her core, gave her a shot of confidence that her lacy red bra and knickers had found an appreciative audience.

  ‘Anna …’ he groaned and when she stepped forward and fought with his white shirt, he ripped it off and threw it across the room. Anna’s hands found the waistband of his dress trousers and as she fumbled with the button and zip, he found her mouth, his lips hungry and his tongue probing. As she reached around and pushed his trousers down, his hands found her breasts, gently cupping them, his thumbs strumming across her peaked nipples and Anna heard an animalistic groan. Then realised it was her.

  ‘You are unbelievable,’ Joe moaned as he dipped his head and sucked at one nipple through the red lace. With a flick, he’d undone the clasp and her bra was thrown onto the chest of drawers, landing with a clatter and a tinkle of glass. And then they were both naked and Anna leapt into his arms, throwing her arms around his neck and her legs around his thighs.

  Tonight I have no history. Tonight I have no past. I have only this moment.

  When he lifted her, she rubbed against him, and was left in no doubt about what he wanted to do with his erection. Joe took a step back and they tumbled on to the bed, arms and legs tangled, Anna’s arms tight around his neck and his mouth on hers. With a quick move, she was on his lap, her knees bent on either side of him, pressing tight against his hips. When Joe leaned forward to take a nipple between his lips, when he tugged it and bit her so gently at first before sucking her into his own mouth, she was undone.

  ‘Joe,’ she cried out, so primed and ready and spread wide for him that she moved onto him, slid herself down his cock, holding her breath as she engulfed him, wanting to be filled by his length and power, scared by how it would feel but thrilled that it felt so right.

  ‘Anna?’

  In her dream, Joe’s voice was gravelly and deep and his arms were so tight around her she was fighting for breath. And he was inside her, his smooth skin slick against her, his voice in her ear, possessive, hoarse with desire.

  Pins and needles stabbed at Anna’s left arm and something was jammed up against her cheek. In her dream, it had been Joe’s face. Now it was only a cushion. And instead of the sounds of raw, desperate sex, there was simply a voice calling her through the fog and the warm sun on her cheek. She urged her reluctant eyelids open.

  ‘Hi, Dr Morelli.’

  CHAPTER

  21

  The tall, blond man from Anna’s dream was standing right there in front of her. She swallowed, took a deep breath in an attempt to shake herself back to consciousness, embarrassed at the sudden heat she felt flaming in her cheeks and at the top of her thighs. She hadn’t had a dream in forever. And the first time she’d had a decent one, it had to be interrupted right at the moment of … damn it, interrupted by the person who was the leading man.

  ‘Hi, Joe.’

  It was him, of course it was. This was Middle Point after all. He was standing at the end of the sofa, his hands tucked into the pockets of faded jeans, his uniform black T-shirt looking soft and comfortable. And there was a huge, sexy grin plastered all over his face.

  ‘Sorry if I woke you up from your nanna nap.’

  Anna managed a grunt. A quick glance revealed the space next to her on the sofa was vacant and they seemed to be alone. The rest of the house was quiet. Every bit of relaxation she’d been wallowing in as she woke hurtled away in a frisson of nervous energy. How long had Joe been standing there? Had she, merda, muttered anything in her sleep? And why was he looking at her like that, all sly grin with the usual one eyebrow raised.

  Anna sat up, rearranged her hair, surreptitiously wiped her chin just in case there was any sleep dribble there. ‘Where’s Julia?’ Her voice came out sleep-croaky and she cleared her throat.

  ‘Ry dragged her out. You looked dead to the world so they snuck out without you and left me on guard duty. You know, just in case axe-wielding murderers come to call.’ Joe strode past her to the kitchen and she watched his long-legged lope with great concentration. She heard the fridge open and before she could blink, he was back with a bottle and two wine glasses. Without an invitation, Joe made himself comfortable next to her on the sofa, screwed off the top and poured two generous splashes before handing one to her.

  She stared at the bottle and then Joe. ‘Isn’t it a little early to be having a drink?’

  Joe flicked a glance at his watch. It was a chunky silver piece, hanging loose around his wrist. ‘It’s five o’clock. That’s never too early in my book.’ Joe leaned back, propped one arm on the back of the sofa. If she moved one inch, his fingers would touch her.

  ‘Five o’clock?’ Anna glanced at her own watch for confirmation. ‘That’s impossible. I can’t have been asleep for two hours.’

  Joe sipped his wine and settled in, propping his bare feet on a magazine on the dark wooden coffee table and crossing them at the ankles. ‘It’s the beach. The fresh air. The sound of the waves. It’ll do it to you every time. Don’t fight it. It’s a good thing, don’t you think, to relax and let go when you really need to?’

  Letting go. Now that sounded like a good idea. ‘It can be.’

  ‘So was it at least a decent nap? The dead-to-the-world kind? Are you feeling relaxed?’

  Anna stared out the front windows to the sky. She couldn’t look at him. The last thing she felt was rested. She felt like a coiled spring, tension building in her that she feared might mysteriously unleash at any moment. Relaxed was not the word to describe how she was feeling. ‘I was having a bad dream as a matter of fact.’

  ‘Lucky you’re awake then. I hear you’re down here for the whole Easter weekend.’

  Anna looked at him sideways. ‘How do you know that?’

  Joe scoffed. ‘Please.’

  Anna tried not to notice that his tanned arm was a strong contrast against the white of the leather.

  ‘I’m here until Monday afternoon.’

  ‘Good.’ Joe grinned and sipped his wine.

  Anna crossed her arms. ‘Why is that good?’

  ‘Because I think we need to talk.’

  ‘I don’t think we do.’

  ‘There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you.’

  Anna glanced at him. ‘Have you?’

  Joe swirled his wine around in his glass, creating a tide that spun the honey-coloured liquid. He concentrated on the rhythm he made with it and then, having kept her hanging long enough, shifted his position, moving his long legs off the coffee table and crossing one over the other, in her direction. Now, his knee was inches from hers.

  ‘I’m wondering when you’re going to tell me the truth about the night we spent together.’

  Anna tried with great determination not to feel the hairs goose bumping on the back of her neck. ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’

  ‘I think you do. I’m wondering, in particular, about the part where you told me you were married and then walked out.’

  Anna jerked an arm out and grabbed the glass of wine Joe had poured for her. She gulped it down in one quick slurp. It gave her time to think about what she was going to do. When the glass was empty, she gripped the stem in her fist.

  ‘What are you––’

  They both heard it and turned. The front door had swung open and Ry, Julia, Dan and Lizzie were coming inside with smiles and laughter and the sounds of the ocean at their backs. Anna found St Christopher and bit her lip. The conversation Joe seemed determined to have was not one to continue in mixed company. Or was simply one not to have at all if Anna
had her way. She turned to smile at everyone else

  ‘You’re awake,’ Julia called as she walked to the kitchen, laden with bags. ‘I hope you’re hungry. We have enough food with us for dinner tonight and for the whole weekend.’

  ‘Hey, Stinkface,’ Lizzie called as she glanced over to where Joe and Anna were sitting on the sofa, acting as if she was totally unsurprised to see the two of them together. She was lugging two bags of shopping to the kitchen bench and hauled them to a rest on top of it. ‘Hey, Anna. It’s so good to see you.’

  Anna stood and, without giving Joe the satisfaction of even a sideways glance, picked up her empty wine glass and joined them in the kitchen. ‘You too, Lizzie. You sure you have enough food?’

  Lizzie laughed. ‘We plan to have a weekend-long feast of food and wine and we’ve done enough shopping so we won’t have to leave here for four days. You up for that, Anna?’

  Anna had to admit it sounded like the best kind of medicine. And the more group activities, the better. That would mean her chances of being alone with Joe would be slim to none.

  ‘It sounds perfect,’ she sighed. ‘What can I do?’

  ‘Not a thing, Anna.’ Dan was beside her, and before she could turn he’d leaned down to her and kissed her noisily. Ry was close behind him and he shot her a cheeky wink as he passed her, a carton of wine in his arms.

  The two couples laughed and bantered with each other as they unpacked groceries and Ry stored the white wine and champagne in the fridge. Anna sat on one of the kitchen stools and set her glass on the marble bench. She didn’t want to look over her shoulder to see what Joe was up to. Like a disobedient puppy, she didn’t want to give his bad behaviour any attention.

  Why did he want to revisit that night? You told me you were married. Well, damn him. He hadn’t exactly told her the truth, either. Mr Suave Sydney Newsman was running from his own disasters and she didn’t recall him spilling his guts about that, either. So they’d both exorcised their feelings about their crappy marriages and their cheating exes by sleeping with someone they’d just met. Weren’t they both guilty of concealing the truth? Anna’s Catholic guilt flared inside her. What gave him the moral authority to throw accusations around like confetti at a wedding?