Jasper: Purple Flamingos Fly at Midnight (Jasper - Purple Flamingos Fly at Midnight Book 1)

by Refner, Daniel

  “You’re talking about Noah. He is not just a Sunday school story? He was real and so was his ark full of animals? This is amazing. Wait till I tell Stacy about this. She will have a field day learning the real history of her favorite tale.”

  “WOW, I forgot how rich and rewarding human reactions can be. Remind me later, and I will tell you why Moses really struck that rock with his staff. I was watching that day and let me just say, Scripture left out a few details. So going back to Infernal Max, after the flood was over, he was spotted building a drilling machine in one of the caves off of the lava slide transport. However, due to the damage to the earth, and the shift of the tectonic plates cause by the weight of the worldwide receding water, the search for him was abandoned. There was no time to repair the lava slide because the earth needed to be restored. What happened to Infernal Max and his machine is anyone’s guess. But I can tell you this: he is still out there, and if we cross his path we had both better pray hard that we survive the encounter. He has his daddy’s powers, but worse than that he is a demon with mommy issues, and that makes him lethal.”

  “I have just one question. How much longer do I have to wait before we rescue my parents?”

  “Not much longer. Soon, but first we have to reunite you with Stacy. You are not the only one who has a part to play in all of this, Jasper.” Abbadorn stood up and reached his hand out to Jasper to pull him up from his sandy seat. “Time to go back, we will wait for the arrival our dinner guest.”

  “Abbadorn, how sensitive is your nose…you might not want to sit too close to Great Grandpa during dinner…just saying.” Jasper raised his eyebrows and gave a quick sniff with his nose in the air. Abbadorn was completely confused, and this caused Jasper to snicker all the way down to the lava slide chamber. “I hope he doesn’t serve us beans.”

  chAPTER twenty-nine

  In Heaven upon the streets of gold, two of the most famous saints of old were coming to the end of their stroll: Noah, of the renowned ark legend, and Moses, of the Ten Commandments fame. Both were walking in brown sandals, and both displayed gray beards that flowed down to a thin point, completely hiding their necks from view. From there the differences began. Noah was bald, whereas Moses had a full head of curly gray hair, unruly beneath a flat purple cap. They both had a free-flowing garment that hung down just below their knees. Noah’s was blue and tied at the waist with a golden rope, while Moses had a brown garment pressed neatly against his skin beneath his long red robe. Moses walked with a wooden staff in hand, but Noah preferred to walk with his arms crossed in front of him. At this particular moment he was pouting.

  “Come on, old man. My home isn’t much more than a few steps away. I have a big retro birthday surprise waiting for you in my back courtyard. You’re going to love it. You will be the envy of heaven.” Moses could barely contain his excitement.

  “Who are you to call anyone an old man?” Noah stated flatly, then proceeded to spit three times to his left. “This had better not be like the pocket-sized Ten Commandment tablets you tried to pass off on me in the 3rd century.”

  “You won’t be able to refuse this gift for the sake of modesty. Besides, you can’t have them now even if you wanted; I gave them to Adam and Eve as a treasured keepsake.”

  “Oh, like those two know how to follow the rules. You should have given them to King David; now there is a guy who likes to write and appreciates the written word. He signed my personal copy of the 23rd Psalm. I have it hanging in my bedchamber. A constant reminder of God’s written word inspired.”

  “You can read? That’s new information. Where in history did you take the time to learn that?”

  “How rude, you young…” Moses smacked Noah on the back, causing him to cough as they entered the courtyard. Noah shot him a dirty look and Moses ignored it, realizing he had just gotten away with interrupting Noah’s short lived rant on purpose.

  “Ta-da, here we are, Noah; your birthday surprise rises before you.” Moses thrust his hands upward to show the grandeur of what he had been hiding beneath hundreds of yards’ worth of billowing curtains. Small bunny-like creatures with wings began pulling down on silver cords, releasing the curtains to fall off the backside of the large hidden gift. They fell almost silently to the courtyard floor, just a soft thumping sound followed by a fast whip of escaping wind. Noah stood speechless, his mouth gaping toward the ground. He moved his wide eyes left to right in a futile attempt to take into view the entire sight. “Happy birthday, Noah! Do you like it? I built you a precise replica of the ark you crashed into God’s mountain.”

  “I didn’t crash the ark. It ‘settled,’ ever so gently.”

  “That’s not the story your wife gave me…but never mind, just look at it. Is this not the best present ever, and it didn’t take me 120 years to build,” Moses boasted.

  “It’s too big, where did you get your measurements? This is a terrible gift, easily three times the size of my ark. What a horrible time that was for me…all those smelly animals.”

  “Elijah assured me the size of every cubit,” Moses said in great disappointment while pursing together his lips.

  “You asked Elijah for help after you hid his prized chariot in his pool. Wow, you are not enlightened, are you?” Noah made no attempt to hide his contempt.

  “Are you calling me stupid?” Moses said plainly as he stood with both hands on his staff, leaning forward and sticking his butt outward.

  “Gee, let me think about it. You walk all the way up a giant mountain to speak to a burning bush. You were so out of shape it almost killed you. You come down from the mountain with two lapis lazuli stone tablets. Again, you were ready to fall over dead, then in a stroke of genius you threw those tablets at a golden calf that had no chance of running away from you because it wasn’t real, and you ended up breaking the tablets you just came back with. So who is suddenly stupid?” Noah rolled his eyes. He walked over to the ark’s wooden ramp; he placed his arm against the wood. “From end to end this is one cubit.” He knocked on the wood with his fist. “This isn’t gopher-wood.”

  “It’s an upgrade I call meteor-wood and it can exist for a long, long, time.”

  “You mean to say worm-wood, and that stuff is denser then iron, it could never float.” Noah rolled his eyes. Moses couldn’t meet his gaze and chose instead to look down at his feet.

  Moses realized he had been duped. “I’m sorry, Noah. I was really hoping to impress you this year.”

  “Well, it is not a complete loss. Truth be told, riding on the ark wasn’t a pleasure cruise of any kind. Yes, we obeyed the Lord and avoided death, but I didn’t care for the trip. It stunk, literally. If you let me re-gift this to doubting Thomas, I would be ever so indebted. He thinks I had a forty-day Carnival pleasure cruise. We could pack it full of camels. He hates camels, and they spit; what a mess he will have.” Both Moses and Noah shared a hearty laugh.

  They were laughing so hard they never saw the approaching danger. Suddenly, beneath their sandals the ground began to shift form. Black mist floated upward toward them. Four pairs of hands reached up and seized them by their ankles. Noah and Moses were both startled. This mist continued to rise upward, snatching the light from their countenances and fading them to black. They screamed righteous indignation at this violation, but no help came. Slowly they began to sink out of the bottom of heaven. They were being abducted, carried off by the four demonic goons that Gezon had sent through the open gate during Jayla’s fall from grace. In that moment of terror and panic, the staff of Moses slipped from his very hands. Noah managed to catch it before it struck the ground knowing it would cause great devastation in heaven. Instead he held it firmly between both hands and whacked Moses over the head causing him to stop screaming like a scared little girl. Moses grabbed the staff out of his hand and held onto it for dear life, like a security blanket.

  Noah spoke. “Suck it up, cupcake. There is no harm they can bring unto us. We’re dead, remember?”

  Noah, with his arms cros
sed, began to pout yet again. So much for a quiet birthday, he said to himself.

  Then they were gone. The most favored saints of old, dissolved away by the darkness, taken against their will. Heaven was troubled and the city, as if in mourning, became silent once again.

  chAPTER thirty

  The pearl glass doors on the lava slide once again turned red and opened, but this time the door didn’t speak. Gezon and Jayla emerged. The air bristled with negative energy. Lester and Ned knelt quickly in a humble, obedient greeting. Gezon could smell their fear, and it empowered him. This is how the humans will worship me and respect my authority, he said to himself. Gezon was slow to tell them to stand up. He hated humans and wanted only to cause them great pain and death; Lester and Ned were nothing more than fleshy meat suits designed to serve his purpose. The lava slide activated, and the group turned to greet the new arrivals.

  “Ah, Moses, Moses, Moses…let my people go, Moses,” Gezon said mockingly. “And you, Noah, the guy who crashed God’s ark. Great driving…pity…I wish you could have hit the side of that mountain harder; mankind would have drowned like the rats you are, and the earth would have been freed of your rotten flesh.”

  Noah sent him a dirty look but spoke not a word.

  “Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Gezon. You may have heard of me, I was Lucifer’s right hand during his failed rebellion attempt. I am the leader of the second rebellion. As you have no doubt noticed, my powers are even beyond that of Lucifer. I am stronger. Who else could have pulled the two of you out of heaven? I will hold you hostage and all the citizens of heaven will need to decide who they will follow. But, in the meantime, I need a power source for one of those portal ships.” Gezon stopped. He looked squarely at Noah and Moses, yet they gave him no response. They both looked annoyed and upset, but they showed no fear of him. Gezon pondered why they would be giving him the silent treatment. What could he say to break this cold shoulder of theirs and cause a righteous outburst? He so wanted to toy with them but, instead they were making him angry. Gezon circled around to stand behind them as they continued to look straight forward, not even giving a hint that they cared about what he was saying. “I am in the market for some new furniture. I was thinking maybe a new chair or perhaps a throne. The Trinity Throne will do.” Gezon jumped in front of them. He was a mere foot in front of them, and his eyes began to glow red. “So, I was planning a little voyage to Iconium, and suddenly it hit me that I need that key that young Master Indiana possesses in order to use the hourglass as a power source for my new ride. I have made arrangements, gentleman. Jasper Indiana is coming here. He will give me the key of his own free will, or he will die.”

  “With your permission, Lord Gezon, the goon inside Lester will now depart, and I will enter the human boy and control him.” Jayla waited for Gezon to nod his head before she moved toward Lester. Ned looked really unsure and nervous at this point and began to back away, but Lester walked to stand next to Jayla. He held his hands and arms outstretched to his sides and bowed his head in submission.

  “Do it,” Gezon said coldly, and a few seconds later the demonic goon inside Lester misted into a darkly-cloaked form behind Moses and Noah. “I need to set a better mouse trap, and part of that trap is having those skin bags discover the so-called ‘hidden’ portal ships. They are, in fact, not hidden to me. As you are well aware, no evil supernatural being can cross into The Bosom of Abraham uninvited; however, that technicality is null and void if a human walks in of his own free will, all the while being possessed.”

  Jayla waited for Lester’s body to settle. It jolted briefly before becoming still. Jayla raised her hand to her mouth and wiped away the drool that spilled over her lips onto her chin. She was now in complete control of Lester’s body.

  “I have no need to fight fair. I prefer a dirty fight any old century. Jayla, leave now and plant the clues as we discussed. They must find both ships. Do not be seen. Return here when you have accomplished this task.” Jayla, now in Lester’s body, entered the lava slide and was gone. Gezon turned and began to walk into a blue light. “Come, Noah and Moses; witness the hourglass I have found. Once upon a time it had a place in the throne room of the Almighty, until the day I took it.” Gezon led the way. Ned followed in his shadow while the goons pushed Noah and Moses forward into the dazzling blue light.

  chAPTER thirty-one

  Teddy stood watching the lava slide. He knew from past experience that the slide only stayed active when it was in constant use, but who was using it was the question that currently occupied his mind. Was it the good-natured forces of America and England riding to Jasper’s rescue by bumbling around away point after away point, or was it evil finally coming to serve him a cold but well-deserved justice? Teddy for years had been flooded with regret. It was time to take a deep look inside and act. He continually asked himself; how can one person born of passion and joy lose himself to raw hate? For the life of him he couldn’t bring himself to answer that gnawing question. He had long ago closed his heart, but it had ached for far too long; when did he last hold her close…it was time to bring his part in this story to an end. But first he would need to apologize to his grandson Dester and his wife, for what he did to them could never be forgiven.

  Suddenly the pearl doors went red, parted, and falling out of their opening was none other than a black ops assault team led by Sir Lord Bucket, Lieutenant Commander Reginald Mop, Agent Tammy Sue Tate, Lance, Stacy, and Teddy’s granddaughter Debbie-Lynne. Debbie-Lynne held the trumpet of Gabriel.

  “By all that is left good in this world, welcome, welcome all to The Bosom of Abraham.” Teddy greeted the new arrivals as if they had stepped off the plane onto Fantasy Island. “Debbie-Lynne, come over here. Give old Grandpa Teddy a hug.” Teddy held his arms out wide but they went unfulfilled, as one look at Teddy sent Debbie-Lynne into a fainting spell. Lance was quick to catch her before she collapsed completely into a lump on the red sandy floor below her. Slowly the rest of the group began to stand after marveling at yet another member of the Indiana family knee-deep in this spiritual crisis. Was he dead, a ghost, how could he still be alive? Did the rules of life and death not apply in this Bosom of Abraham? Teddy could tell the group had tons of questions. Instead of answering them, he simply told them, “Come with me, Jasper and Thunder and much, much more await you back at my house. You’re all invited to stay for dinner.” With that, Teddy walked over the hill and disappeared out of sight.

  The assault team set up a walking perimeter around the group. Confident in their surroundings, Bucket gave the order to move out. Over the hill they went. Soon they were reunited with Jasper and Thunder. Stacy was over-the-moon at the sight of them. They embraced deeply. Abbadorn was introduced to the group by Jasper, and they all stood in awe and wonder: a real live angel of the Lord. Bucket, Mop, Tate, and Lance walked off with Abbadorn to discuss the situation. This was going to take some time, enough time to give Teddy a head start on making dinner.

  Debbie-Lynne told her grandfather she would be in to help in a few moments. She approached Jasper with the trumpet, held by its sash in her hand. She shared the story of how it was hidden and the way it kept evil away from the farm all those years. She summarized that if he held it while touching Thunder, the angelic power within them both should be enough to bring Gabriel’s trumpet back to full power. Placing the trumpet sling over his head and adjusting it to ride across his back, she leaned in and whispered into his ear, “I’m so sorry I kept all this from you. I thought I was protecting you, but I can see now how wrong I was. Forgive me.” She kissed him on the cheek and backed away.

  Jasper gently reached out to stop her departure. He threw his arms around her, submerging her head in his chest. “There is nothing here that needs to be forgiven. You have been both my mom and my dad my whole life. I owe you everything and love you most of all. What’s done is done, and you need to take this time right here, right now, and pour out this misery you feel and fill your cup up with a hallelujah. Th
is is a beautiful mess, and we are in this together. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love you always, no matter what. No one could ever convince me that you are anything less than a beautiful soul.”

  “Thank you, my son,” Aunt Debbie-Lynne said as she walked away. To Jasper’s knowledge, this was the very first time she had ever called him ‘son,’ and he smiled from the inside out. He thought he could just burst apart in joy at this very moment. Wow…he felt wow.

  Stacy called Thunder over to her. She took him by the neck and jumped onto his back. Jasper followed her lead and leapt up onto Thunder behind her. They began to move away in the direction of the stream. It was “me time,” and by “me” they both meant “us.” For a moment Jasper imagined his own trinity: Jasper, Stacy, and Thunder, three yet one. The assault team standing guard let them pass by without a word. As they moved away, the trumpet, held by the sash across Jasper’s back, began to glow once again with the brightest of red shimmers, but no one noticed. A set of eyes appeared on the inside rim of the trumpet bell. They looked all around, blinked twice, squinted, then disappeared.