Fighting against Gravity: A Standalone Enemies-to-Lovers Sports Romance (An Ice Tigers Hockey Romance Book 3)
Page 13
The love of my life has already forgotten about me. But I’ll never forget her.
I’ll always love her, even though she broke her promise. And I’ll cherish our memories. Until my dying day.
One day I might be able to think of the love of my life without the pain of loss shooting through my whole body.
One day I might be able to be grateful for the opportunities she gave me.
I lift my head and watch as the last tear on my cheek drops on the ice where it dissolves until it’s impossible to say where my first love begins and my sadness ends.
I place my hand over the spot. Coldness bites into my flesh. I wish the cold was enough to numb my pain. It isn’t.
I never knew what people meant when they said their heart was bleeding.
I know now.
And I wish I didn’t.
Chapter 14
Ellie
Thunder explodes outside. The weather mirrors the turmoil inside me.
I can’t sleep for a second night in a row. How could I after today’s… I’m not sure what happened today. All I know is, there’s more to Michael King than meets the eye. So much more.
I wrap the thin day blanket tighter around me and stare into the darkness. My voice is still hoarse from when I called Michael’s name over and over again while he lay motionless on the ice.
What was he thinking? He could have caught pneumonia. He wouldn’t listen and I couldn’t reach him with my crutches. How would I have walked on the ice with them? I’m pretty sure I’d have a hard time walking on the slippery surface with an unbroken foot, but with crutches, I didn’t want to risk it.
Thank God I found Emilia’s husband, and he was willing to help. Michael’s look was one of disbelief when Matt hurried to him and offered him his hand to help him up. The moment he accepted Matt’s outstretched arm, all tension left my body. And I sank back into one of the arena’s leather seats.
Without wanting to I had a front row seat to Michael King’s breakdown. Without wanting to, I suffered with him as he fell on the cold surface under him—holding on to it as if he was unwilling to let go.
Michael is far from being my favorite person in the world. But no one deserves to have his heart broken. He didn’t have to say it. His raw sobs told me everything. Hockey was his passion, and it was taken away from him before he was ready to let go of it.
I know what that kind of pain feels like. I felt it when Steven left me.
Open heart surgery without anesthesia couldn’t have possibly hurt more.
This morning Michael’s pain was radiating all through the arena. And I wished I had the power to give him back his hockey career. He might be the biggest asshole on the planet, but he’s still only human.
The now familiar scratching sound of Michael’s cane interrupts my thoughts. Apparently, I’m not the only person in the house suffering from insomnia.
“Can’t sleep?” I ask as a silhouette becomes visible in the dark doorway.
“No.” His voice sounds hoarse. In order to find closure, he had to grieve what he lost. Most likely he shed way more tears than he wanted to. I don’t blame him. I don’t know how I would react if I was in his situation.
“Thank you.” His voice is steadier now, but he remains frozen.
“For what?” I try to make out the expression on his face. Unfortunately, it’s too dark to see.
“For not telling Emilia that you fell because of me. And for….” His voice cracks.
“Come here.” I open my arms. I couldn’t hold him this morning. But I can now. He needs someone to hold him right now. He’d probably never say so, but… I can’t give him back what he has lost, but I can comfort him.
At first he’s frozen in place. But I keep my arms open. He should be able to see the outlines of my body.
He sniffles. And my heart breaks for him. With so many unshed tears inside his body, it’s no wonder he’s lashing out at each and every one. It doesn’t justify his actions. But it explains his behavior to a certain degree.
“Come here, Michael,” I encourage.
He takes a hesitant step in my direction. Then he’s in my arms faster than I can blink.
I hold him tight, hoping to lend him some of my inner strength. No sound leaves his mouth, but wetness covers my skin where his head leans against my neck and shoulder. My heart goes out to this impossible man.
I don’t know how long I embrace him. Time stands still. All I want is to help ease his pain. No one deserves to suffer alone. Not even the cockiest bastard.
I stare over Michael’s shoulder into the darkness outside. I’m momentarily blinded by moonlight when a cloud makes room for the big white ball in the night sky.
“I’m sorry,” Michael mumbles against my neck. I shiver.
“Don’t apologize for your tears, I—”
His forehead leaves my skin. “No, that’s not what I meant. I… I’m sorry… for the things I said.” His voice is barely a whisper.
I lean back in the cushions and pull away from Michael. Most people look horrible when they cry with puffy faces and red-rimmed eyes. He doesn’t. The wetness seems to enhance the unusual color of his eyes as they shine like ice crystals in the moonlight.
I hold my breath and lock my gaze with his. Seconds turn to minutes as neither of us moves.
Then he swallows. And his eyes wander to my lips.
I open my mouth slightly. It’s all the invitation he needs.
Soft lips crush mine in a hard and unyielding kiss while his palms hold my head in place.
The air is knocked out of my lungs when he rolls on top of me, effectively trapping my hands between our bodies. He is all hard muscle and male power. Dangerous and overwhelming. Deliciously so. Electric shocks run through my body where his body touches mine.
He grinds his hips against my lower body and pokes me with what I know from yesterday is an impressive package—even intimidating when it nestles right between my thighs.
I pull away. Our eyes meet. We’re so close the icy-blue is burning right into me. Cold one moment, hot and flaring like a laser the next. Intense.
Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t look away. More moonlight floods the living area and I detect little speckles of a darker blue around his irises.
Funny that I haven’t paid attention to them until now.
Michael stares at me for long seconds. I swallow and lick my lips. His lips are on mine the second my tongue is back in my mouth. Plundering it. Opening my mouth to his with the force that is his tongue. Crashing into it with rapid swirls.
Hang on, this can’t be right. Shouldn’t he be a more refined kisser with all the practice he must have? I try to pull away, but his hands keep my mouth firmly in place while his tongue moves in faster circles like a washing machine on full speed, and his hands grab my boobs for a torture massage. What is wrong with this man?
While I struggle against his tongue, he bunches up my nightshirt, pushes my panties to the side, and pulls down his pants. Before I can so much as blink he positions his penis at my entrance. Is he out of his mind?
“Michael.” I wiggle my hands free and push against his chest while his penis strokes over my opening—my half-dry opening. “Michael, stop.”
He pulls away with a frown, and I release my breath.
“Is something wrong?” He blinks twice.
I bite the end of my tongue. “Umm… I’m not sure how to say this.”
He winks. “Am I making you speechless?”
“Uh… not in the way you may think.” I push on his chest again and he falls on his side away from me. I clear my throat. “Michael, I’m not sure how to say this, but… how many women have you been with?”
“Is that a trick question?” He pushes up on his elbow.
I blink twice. “No. No trick question.”
He rubs his chin. “Uh… I don’t know. I think—”
“On second thought, don’t say it. What I mean is… are you sure they were all… you know… satisfied?”
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His eyebrows shoot up. “Do you mean did I give them earth-shaking orgasms?” The two perfectly styled lines of hair above his eyes lower as his expression turns to smug. “Sure, I did.”
I bite my lower lip, unsure of how to continue. This is a delicate conversation. “Uh… could it be, you know, uh… that they… faked it?”
“Faked orgasms?” His voice indicates he thinks I’ve lost my mind.
“You know…. Never mind. I don’t want to talk about other women while we’re doing….” I swallow. “The thing is…. You want to please me, right?”
He nods. “Sure.”
I open my mouth. Close it again. Then I say what needs to be said. “Well, I can’t come from penetration alone.”
“I don’t like to go down on women.” He wrinkles his nose.
“That’s fine. You don’t have to. You have ten functioning fingers, don’t you?”
He looks at his manicured hands and nods.
I exhale slowly. I have an idea. Now or never, Ellie. “Let’s play a game. I’m in charge and you do what I tell you. But you only do it if you want to. You can say no to anything, okay?”
I’m way out of my comfort zone here, but I won’t lie. I want him. Even though I was attracted to him physically, I didn’t want to sleep with him yesterday. But I only knew the asshole version of him then. As much as I’d like to get to know his other side better, the physical attraction between us demands I do something else. Now is not the time for words. It’s time to talk with our bodies.
But I want to be the one in charge. I want to make the rules and leave before I can do something as stupid as get too attached to him. The attraction between us is primal. Nothing more than sexual. What can possibly go wrong?
“Yeah. I can do that.” Michael bends over me again. “So, you don’t like quickies?”
I lick my lips. “There’s nothing wrong with quickies now and then. They can be exciting, but I think I’ll need to warm up this time. It has been a while for me.”
Understanding flashes over his features before he bends down to kiss me. I push my hands against his chest before his lips reach mine.
“I need a bit of warm-up time with kissing too. Can I have the lead?”
He nods, his eyes glassy. Thank God this is working.
I want… this. I want to know how Michael’s muscles feel under my hands while he moves over me.
I want to be pounded into oblivion, but on my terms.
He has the stamina and the package to do it; I have the brain to tell him how. I’m using him like men have used me in the past. It’s retribution. Payback. Pure and simple. I’m taking back control.
“Close your eyes and use your hands to explore me.” That way you won’t see the stretch marks and the flabby part of my stomach.
Once he leans back over me, I take his face between my palms. “Hold still. Follow my lead.” I move my lips over his while I speak. He shivers.
His lips are soft and warm when I take my time exploring them, learning about their texture and form and caressing them with my tongue. Only then do I ask for entrance and explore his mouth with the same care as his lips, slow and deliberate.
If the shaking of his arms is an indication of how much he likes my kisses, I’m on the verge of becoming a sex goddess. Time to put everything I ever read and learned from smutty books to the test.
Chapter 15
Michael
She guides me during the first kiss, molding her mouth to mine while I take the passenger seat.
It’s… different. Sensual. Like no kiss I’ve ever experienced before.
While her tongue explores my mouth, her nipples burn holes through my shirt. I itch to touch them, but she’s the one in control. Her arms are tightly locked around my neck, holding me in place while her lips show me how to move my mouth.
“Touch me,” she whispers and warm air flows over my lips.
“Where?” My lips move over hers, returning the warmth.
“Here.” She takes her hand from my neck and places one of mine where her neck meets her collarbone. “Use only your fingertips.”
I hover over her skin, unsure how to proceed. My hands are shaking while my blood is shooting through my veins at rapid speed. When my skin meets hers, an electric shock shoots through my whole body and my eyes fly open.
Her eyes fall shut and her mouth opens as I trail my fingers over her shoulders and neck area. She’s enjoying my caresses.
Since the moon is mostly covered by a cloud again, it’s hard to see more than the outlines of her lush body. But her rapid breaths tell me about her most sensitive spots.
I take my time getting to know each little dent and savor the silky softness under my fingertips. She has the silkiest skin. Crazy how I hadn’t noticed its perfection before.
“Where…” I clear my throat. “Where next?”
“Here.” She moves my hands to her boobs.
I swallow. “Can… can I take off your nightdress?”
“Yes.” Her voice is deep and throaty, and a shiver runs down my spine when she speaks.
I push up and hold her upright with one hand while I take off the dress with the other. The rough cloth is a stark difference to her silky softness.
Slowly, not to hurt her broken leg, I lower myself over her again. Thank God for all my upper body training. My leg can’t hold my weight anymore, but my arm muscles sure can.
My fingertips hover over the place I can’t wait to explore. I go slow. She doesn’t need to tell me this time. Shifting my weight to one side, I place one fingertip over her nipple.
“Tell me how.” I place my mouth on her neck. She shivers.
“L-Little circles.” Her voice is no more than a whisper.
First, I barely touch her as I move my finger around the little button, but with each round, I increase the pressure and the circle’s size, stroking her breasts with more determination. Her body tenses under mine and the corners of my mouth lift up against her neck.
“Am I doing it right?” I lick a trail from her ear to her collarbone.
“Shut up.”
I chuckle. “Yes, Your Majesty.” My lips find her neck again while my fingers press the small peaks together. Her hips shoot up from the couch and I gasp when they make contact with my erection.
My dick is more than ready to explode and sways against my stomach regularly. Each time a tingle shoots through my balls. Each time I itch to push inside her. But I won’t do it. Her pleasure has become more important than my own. I want to please her—please her so much she doesn’t know her own name anymore.
My fingers delve into her velvety soft wetness. I tremble all over. She’s dripping wet, and I can’t wait to feel the liquid heat around my dick.
I use the same slow circles around her center she taught me to arouse her breasts with and her breathing hitches to new heights. I’ve found the magic place. Taking my time, I explore what’s hidden between her thighs.
Ellie’s body twitches from time to time and her hips lift up against my fingers. She’s showing me without words what takes her closer to fulfillment.
My senses are heightened, registering each spike in her breathing and each tensing in her thigh muscles.
At this point, my dick has grown to a painful size, and my balls are ready to shoot their load. Taking care of her needs first is pure torture, but one I’m willing to endure. Each of her little sighs takes away from the discomfort I’m experiencing in my lower body. But I won’t last forever.
I increase the pressure and speed of my circles.
I need her to come against my hand. I need to be the one that brings her pleasure.
To soothe her. To make her forget about my treatment of her. She deserves it. If I could, I’d erase our previous encounters and rewrite them.
My breathing accelerates with hers when she grabs my wrist with one hand, squeezing it so hard the blood has no chance to flow through my veins. Every muscle in her body tenses. Then slackens. I feel like a warlord a
fter winning the final battle.
A grin spreads across my face when Ellie slumps back against the couch, and her limbs fall wide to the side.
“Are you satisfied?” I bend down and kiss her.
She opens her eyes slowly and smiles. “Yeah, I could sleep now. Could you hand me the blanket, please?”
My jaw drops. She can’t mean to leave me without fulfillment, can she? I already have an epic set of blue balls.
“You should see your face.” She giggles.
My lips hover over hers. “How can you even tell in the darkness?”
“I could hear your jawbone hit the floor.” She kisses me. Twice. Two small teasing pecks.
I frown. “So, we aren’t done yet?”
She reaches her hands around my neck and kisses me. Deep and lingering. When she pulls away, I feel… empty, as if something was missing.
“No. Told you it would be hard to keep up with me.” Her hands trail down my chest, and I gasp when they land on my dick. My forehead drops against hers, and my fists clench. She massages my erection and my balls, squeezing a little harder each time. Damn, that feels amazing—nearly painful, but in a good way.
“Are you clean?” Her voice finds my ears through a haze.
I gulp air. Holy shit, what will her pussy do to me when her fingers feel so freaking good. “Yeah. It… it’s been a while.”
With one hand behind my neck, Ellie pulls my lips back on hers, with the other she positions me at her entrance, and arches her hips. I sink inside. One inch at a time, shaking all over. Velvety softness surrounds me. Embraces me. Brings me to the edge of a climax without any friction.
Why is this so different from everything I’ve ever felt before?
Because you’ve never done it bare before, a little voice whispers in my head. She’s bringing me to my knees without having me carry out the motion. I shiver when she arches her hips again and I slide in as deep as I can go.
Tears pool in my eyes. Why the hell am I crying?
I pull out and surge back inside, trying to bury the pesky emotions threatening to overwhelm me.