To Vegas with love

by J. A. Cipriano

  “It seems you are correct.” He cocked his head sideways. “My apologies.” He nodded to me. “I trust that when we return everything will be ready for us?”

  “Yeah, sure.” I waved him off. “Don’t let the door hit you where the good Lord split you.” Without waiting for his response, I spun on my heel and looked at Shelley who could barely suppress her grin. “Can you have someone show them out? I don’t trust them not to wander around.”

  “My pleasure.” Shelley marched past me, ushering them out. “Go on, get out.” She made a shooing gesture. “Quickly.”

  I laughed and shook my head before focusing on Skye who was sliding her phone back into her purse. The look on her face was anything but jovial.

  “What’s going on?” I asked as she took a step closer to me and leaned in, so she could whisper in my ear.

  “Basically? We’re fucked.” She took a step back. “Let’s get a drink. This conversation is going to need a lot of alcohol.”

  “That bad?” I asked as she began to walk toward the door that led to my private office and the fully stocked bar within.

  She looked back at me over her shoulder. “Oh, take bad and multiply it by a bazillion and it’s like about twice that bad.”

  “So, Amy is coming here?”

  Skye opened the door and moved to the bar. She grabbed a bottle of Macallan 15-Year-Old 1947, poured two fingers into a glass, and offered it to me. “No.” She shook her head as I took the glass. Then she poured more into her glass and raised it to me. “That’s the absolute last thing we want right now.”

  “I’m not following,” I said as Skye downed half her glass in a gulp.

  “It’s bad luck not to drink after a toast and trust me, you need all the luck you can get.” Skye stared at me until I took a sip.

  It was great but would have probably been better mixed with Coca-Cola. Yeah. I’m making a joke.

  “So, explain the situation.” I looked at her. “Is there another pen user or something?”

  “No.” She shook her head as she settled into the plush leather couch on the far wall and stared into her drink. “We’re officially in hostile takeover territory, and not the good kind.”

  “There’s a good kind of hostile takeover?” I said, confused. “And who cares, I can pen us through it.”

  “Yeah, maybe, but Amy needs to walk you through that.” Skye sipped her whiskey. “She says she’s got it under control, but that you need to head to the bank and buy up all the remaining debt.”

  “That seems easy enough?” I shook my head. “Honestly, I don’t understand what is going on. Can you just explain it to me like I’m four?”

  “Some jackass bought all the debt from the consortium Amy used to leverage the Medallion, and now they are saying we’re not good for it. They’ve gotten rubber stamped approval from some pocket judge to do inspections, which will wind up showing that we’re doing terribly.”

  “But we’re not doing terribly. We’re making record profits.” I shook my head. “And I can make sure those reports say whatever we want them to say.”

  “Yeah.” Skye finished her drink. “Amy doesn’t seem to think either of those things matters unless you’re going to go full-on supervillain to stop them.” She moved toward me and took my drink. “This is just the opening salvo, because assuming we survive this? Then we get to deal with the government which is super fun.” She took a drink of the whiskey and handed it back to me. “You should finish that, it’s good.”

  “Right, okay.” I shut my eyes for a second, formulating a plan with the limited information I had. “Basically, they’re coming for us, and we need to stop them.” I shrugged. “We have this.”

  “I know. We just need to figure out a way to do it smartly.” Skye moved past me, heading to the bar. “And you need to clear as much of our debt as you can. That will help a ton.”

  “Right. Let me call a driver.”

  “Oh, I already did that,” Skye said, grinning at me. “The car’s downstairs.”

  “Fuck!” Shelley cried, practically kicking my office door open. “Have you seen the news?”

  “No?” I raised an eyebrow at her as she showed me her phone screen. Apparently, the news vans outside thought fifty pounds of cocaine had been found in our kitchen. How that was already on the news was beyond me, but I had a sneaking suspicion the assholes behind this knew exactly. It was timed too perfectly for the arrival of the inspectors.

  “Shelley, it’s okay.” I put a hand on her shoulder. “All the drugs are just flour.” There was a ping in my ear. “Now handle business.”

  “With pleasure,” she said, nodding furiously. She was already ready to go on the warpath, and I was glad she had a target now.

  “I guess I’d better get to the bank.” I handed Shelley the remains of my drink as I stepped out of the room. “Skye, can you figure out who is behind this?”

  “I’ve already put out feelers, but I need to head back to the base to get all my ducks in a row.” She moved next to me, walking toward the elevator with me. “But, if you like, I could go with you?”

  “I think I’ll manage, though I appreciate the offer.” I looked at her, and as I did, she smiled at me, and I suddenly had the urge to kiss her. So, I did.

  “What was that for?” she asked as the elevator dinged, and as it opened, we stepped inside.

  “I just really am grateful you’re in my life.”

  5

  By the time I reached the Las Vegas First National Bank of the Bear, I’d received six more phone calls and eleven emails. I’d never been here before, but apparently, this bank had acted as the middleman between the corporate conglomerate that had purchased most of the debt from the Medallion and us.

  In retrospect, I was really annoyed we’d done it this way because I had expected to have more time. In theory, it’d been a simple plan. Take out a loan on the bank and pay it off with the pen. Repeat until we had enough capital to take over the world. Then I’d laugh evilly and stroke my cat.

  We hadn’t even made it one round before we’d gotten fucked by the man, or the bank, or whatever.

  The casino was under siege, and while Skye and Shelley were doing an incredible job trying to keep us from getting absolutely fucked, I was pissed.

  Thankfully, our biggest problem was about to go away. Exiting the limo, I shielded my eyes from the sun as I looked up and down the street. I hadn’t been attacked since we’d dealt with Presley, but I was still a bit paranoid about being alone on the streets in broad daylight. Sure, I could take care of myself, and Cami had upgraded the nanotech so that even a sniper at 200 yards shouldn’t have been a problem, but you never know.

  Sinkholes and car crashes were things too. Hell, maybe a plane would fall out of the sky.

  I glanced heavenward. It seemed clear of planes.

  Shrugging off my bad feeling, I moved toward the bank and pulled open the glass doors. It wasn’t very big inside, or at least, despite occupying a huge building, the lobby wasn’t very large. There was a line of people waiting for the lone teller to finish popping her gum and about six less than comfortable looking lime green chairs in the center. Five were occupied, three by kids.

  Ugh. That had to suck. I couldn’t imagine bringing a kid to a bank, but these ones seemed well-behaved since their eyes never strayed from their tablets.

  I looked for someone who could help me, but all the cubicles appeared to be empty. That was no good. I glanced at the line and groaned. I didn’t want to wait in it, but I didn’t see another option and using the pen to shortcut it seemed a touch douchey.

  “Fine,” I muttered to myself, and as I began walking toward the line, the glass door to my left opened as a pale, red-headed girl with freckles stormed out.

  “I can’t believe you won’t help people get clean drinking water.” Her hand was clenched so tightly around the binder in her hand, I thought it might break. “We have all the collateral for the loan, and the business is sound!” She threw her hands up in
the air. “It’s like you want people to drink bad water.”

  “Look,” the smarmy man with slicked-back hair and an alligator smile said as he looked down his hawkish nose at her. “Our bank just isn’t in the business of funding projects like yours.” He shrugged. “Try a charity or something.”

  “This is a real business.” She fumed as the door shut before she could say more. The guy moved back toward his seat. Then he pulled out his phone and began to fiddle on it. Douchebag.

  “Um … excuse me,” I said, waving my hand at the girl as she stood there looking like she wanted to huff and puff and blow the whole place down.

  “What?” she snapped, whirling on me, fists planted on her hips. She looked me up and down before deflating slightly. “Sorry.”

  “Sorry?” I asked, confused. “What for?”

  “For going long on my meeting. You’re next, right?” She sighed, and I could literally see her idealism die. “I just thought if I had everything, they’d give me the loan, but apparently, they require fifty percent collateral instead of ten because of some regulation I’ve never heard of.” She shook her head. “I don’t know how I’m going to raise that kind of cash.”

  “I’ll fund it.” I shrugged. “Probably.”

  “Wait, what?” she said, green eyes going wide as she stared at me. “You don’t even know what it is.”

  “You said it’s to help with clean drinking water, right?” I smiled. “That seems like something we should do.” I reached into my pocket and pulled out my card, and yes, part of me couldn’t believe I had a card. “Go to the Medallion tomorrow at four o’ clock. You’ll have an appointment.” As I spoke, the mental command pinged.

  “Wait, you’re the guy who owns the Medallion?” She frowned. “The guy with all the girlfriends?”

  “Is that a problem?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at her. “They’re all very good at their jobs.”

  “I guess they would be …” She trailed off. “What you do with your spare time is your own thing, I suppose, and hey, you’re gonna give me a lot of money, so I can deal.”

  “Potentially,” I said, looking her over for a second. “I’m not giving you a dime unless your business plan is sound, and trust me, my associates are going to grill you like a bad steak.”

  “I’ll be ready.” She nodded in determination.

  “Good. Now if you’ll excuse me …” I moved past her and rapped on the glass door with my knuckles until the jackass inside answered.

  “I’m sorry, sir, can I help you?” His eyes flicked from me to the tellers. “I know the line is long, but I’m sure they will assist you as soon as they can.” The door started to close, and I pushed on it with the palm of my hand, keeping it open.

  “I’m Roger Stevens, and I’m here to pay off the loan on the Medallion. Get someone who can help me in the next two minutes.” I glared at him. “I don’t even want to think about what will happen to you if my demands aren’t met.”

  “Sir, I don’t know anything about your medallion.” He gave me a dismissive look. “The tellers can help you with loan payments.”

  “Not a medallion. The Medallion.” I pointed toward the door. “The big fucking casino in the middle of the strip? I own that, you jackass, and I want to speak to someone who isn’t you.” I stared at him and understanding started to dawn on his face. “I’d hate to have to take my sizeable business elsewhere.”

  “Right, sir, sorry, sir.” He took in a huge lungful of air, eyes widening as realization hit him. “I’ll get the manager.” He stepped past me so fast, I thought there would be one of those cartoon smoke cutouts of his form left in his wake.

  “Wow. Must be nice to be someone,” the redhead said, and as I turned toward her, I smiled.

  “It’s not nothing,” I said, remembering exactly what it was like to be no one. I could still remember cleaning up shitty toilets and the like during the night shift. It had been terrible. “Also, I’m sorry. I didn’t catch your name. I’m Roger.” I held out my hand.

  “Ashley.” She took my hand and shook it. “I guess I should go work on my presentation.”

  “I guess you should.” I smirked. “I’ve been trying to find a way to help out the city, and your project seems like a prime candidate.”

  “I’m sorry, Mr. Stevens. I’ve been informed you would like to speak with a manager?” The voice behind me held no mirth, and as I turned around, I found it belonged to a well-groomed older gentleman with dead gray eyes.

  “Yes.” I nodded to him and held out my hand. He took it and limply shook it with his sweaty mitts. “I need to pay off the loan on the Medallion.” I smiled. “I brought my checkbook.”

  “Okay, sir. Let’s see what we can do.” He turned on his heel and began marching toward his office. As he stood beside the open door and gestured for me to go inside, he gave me the fakest smile I’d seen all day. “Please, you and your lady friend step right inside. I’ll pull up your files.”

  “I’m not—”

  I waved a hand at Ashley as I shot her a ‘go with it’ grin. “You’re welcome to come. Maybe we can get lunch afterward, and you can tell me about your project? That way I’ll have some idea what to tell my team when they ask why I blew off my old four o’ clock.”

  “Oh, really?” she practically squeaked. “That would be really great.” She nodded furiously as she followed me toward the office. I let her in ahead of me, and she moved to the far side of the office, so she could take the seat closest to the wall. Well, that was polite.

  Following her in, I sat in the seat by the door as the manager stepped inside and pulled the door closed. Then he bustled around his desk and slumped into his chair.

  “So … I must admit, I didn’t know you were coming.” He put his hands on the desk. “Usually there are appointments for this sort of thing.”

  “Yeah, I’m sorry about that, but something came up.” I nodded to him. “Can you show me the documents, so I can pay them off?” As soon as I got a bill or a loan document with the total or something, I could use my pen to pay them off. Until I got them though, I was kind of at his mercy.

  “Right, it will just be a few moments.” He turned to his computer and began tapping away.

  “I don’t think they’d let me just waltz in here.” Ashley clutched her folder to her chest. “It took me six weeks to get my appointment.”

  “I have a billion dollars.” I shrugged. “They should keep me happy.”

  “Actually, it appears your account is frozen.” The manager looked up at me before turning the screen so I could see that he was right. “Do you still want me to pull up the loan documents?”

  “Yes.” I nodded to him, annoyed at whoever was pulling the strings behind this. It was all happening so fast.

  “You don’t seem as upset by that as I would be,” Ashley said as I pulled out my pad and pen and wrote a new line.

  My bank accounts are no longer frozen.

  It worked, but it was fading already. That wasn’t good. It meant as soon as someone noticed I’d gotten them unfrozen, it’d be frozen for another reason. I pulled out my phone and wrote a quick text to both Amy and Skye, explaining what had happened and what I’d done. I got a thumbs up response from Amy and an angry face from Skye. It was funny because they were probably sitting five feet from each other.

  “Well, this isn’t right.” The bank manager tapped his chin thoughtfully.

  “What isn’t right?” I asked, looking at him as he hit a button and the printer to his right whirred to life.

  “We actually don’t own most of your debt.” He ran a hand through his thinning hair. “You have to pay those portions off to the owners of them directly.” He rolled across the tile in his chair and grabbed the papers from the printer. Then he rolled back and spread them on the desk between us.

  “Here is the ten percent we owe. You’ll see the amount owed is approximately six hundred million dollars.” He looked up at me. “Will you be transferring from another account?”


  “Let me think about it for a second,” I said as I took the document and looked at it. Reading it made me so angry that I wanted to yell at Amy even though I knew it wasn’t really her fault because I’d been responsible for the valuation.

  By using my pen, I’d gotten the casino valued at just over six billion dollars, and our loan had been for about five and a half billion. That wasn’t really the problem though. The problem was that as I looked at the documents, I realized that fully one-third of our debt was now held by Chet’s stupid holding company, and another third was being held by that Modi Asset Management. The rest was split among about fifty smaller companies, and the paperwork clearly stated they needed to all be paid off individually which seemed insane to me.

  “Can you call all these assholes in here?” I tapped the papers with my index finger. “I want this all paid off today.”

  “Sir, I think that will be impossible, but I can try.” He looked like he wanted to make an excuse to not bother, but thankfully, he didn’t.

  “Do that,” I said right before I zeroed out the debt owed to the bank with my pen. Of course, I tried to do the same with the others, but those words didn’t even pretend to stick around.

  6

  “I just don’t get it,” the bank manager said as he led Ashley and me toward the exit. “You’re incredibly lucky that they were all going to be here in two hours.”

  “I always hear that luck thing bandied about.” I laughed. “Maybe I should go play the lottery.”

  “Haven’t you won the lottery?” Ashley asked, flipping her phone around and showing me my Wikipedia page. “Twice?”

  “It was three times, actually, but I gave one of the tickets to this guy I met at the bus stop.” I shrugged. “He seemed like he needed it more than me.”

  “You gave a winning lottery ticket to a guy at a bus stop?” Ashley raised her eyebrow.

  “It would make sense if you were me,” I said as the bank manager opened the door. “Thank you.”