“Is the FBI done wasting our tax dollars?” Skye asked as she answered the phone. “Or is she still there?”
“She’s gone, but I need to take the car to Chet’s. Amy set up a meeting with the board, and I can’t take the limo.” I was already on the way to the elevator as I spoke. “You know where I’m going with this, right?”
“Ugh, I hate taking the limo. It feels so pretentious.” She groaned.
“And the fire-engine red Tesla isn’t?” I asked, hitting the button for the elevator.
“No. Everyone has them now. It’s like a super nice car among other super nice cars.” She sighed. “But it’s fine. I can find my way back.”
“Thanks, Skye.” We said our goodbyes and I hung up as I got into the elevator and rode down.
A moment later, I was walking toward the VIP section of the parking lot where I had parked the Tesla earlier. Only as I grabbed the fob out of my pocket and clicked the button to unlock the car, it exploded in a ball of flames and shrapnel that sent me flying back across the pavement. I slammed hard into the ground as a wave of heat washed over me and bits of debris rained down on me.
“Fuck!” I cried, trying desperately to shield my face with my arms as my nano-body armor, which had taken most of the blast, wrapped my exposed bits in a near impenetrable shell. Even still, as a piece of molten car door slammed into my chest, it felt like I’d broken something important. Maybe many somethings.
A moment later, car alarms and sirens were going off around me, and I was surprised I could hear them through the fuzzy ringing in my ears. My clothes had been shredded and burned, but thanks to my armor, I was okay.
Well, I would be in a second.
“I’m fully healed,” I gasped even though it felt like all my ribs were broken.
As I muttered the words, I suddenly felt a billion times better, which was a bit strange because it was so. There was no feeling the bones adjust back into place. One moment I was bloody, battered, and broken, and the next I was in fighting shape.
“Roger, are you okay?!” Skye cried, rushing out of the building and coming toward me. I could see other people with her.
“I’m fine,” I said, pulling myself to my feet. “Just really pissed off.” I glared at the flaming hunk of metal that used to be my car.
“I think, maybe it’s time to stop fucking around, Roger,” Skye said as she stopped beside me, worry clear on her face. “It’s time to bury Chet.”
“It might not be Chet,” I said though I didn’t believe it. There was no way these attacks weren’t from him.
“You know it is, Roger. Don’t be dumb.” Skye met my eyes. “End this now.”
“Okay.” I patted myself down, wishing my clothes weren’t so fucked up. I could fix that, but right now I didn’t have time. “Can you take care of this? I have a meeting to catch, and if I want to make it, I’ll need to make a call.”
“Sure,” Skye said, immediately moving to deal with things and causing enough of a distraction for me to walk around the corner. Then, after fixing my phone and clothes with a stroke of my pen, I dialed my favorite FBI agent who answered on the sixth ring.
“Long time no see, Roger.” Smith seemed amused. “Did I forget something?”
“Yeah, me.” I smiled though she couldn’t see it.
“Oh? You want to come with me to the FBI.” She laughed. “I thought you were happy fucking over excessive billionaires?”
“I am, but someone just tried to blow me up.” I let out a breath. “And if you want me to be out of your hair sooner rather than later, I need a ride across town since my car is toast.”
“Are you okay?” she asked, clearly concerned. Only as she spoke, I realized I was hearing the words in person, and I spun to find her standing there in front of a glowing swirl of energy. “Where are we going?” I gave her the address, and she nodded. “You know, that’s just a half hour away.”
“Yeah, but time is of the essence.” I took a step toward her and reached out to show her the text, but she waved me off.
“And you thought of me in your time of need, how sweet.” She gestured toward the portal. “Don’t get blown up again, okay? You’re way too cute to have a closed casket funeral, Roger.”
“Wait, you think I’m cute?” I asked, turning to look at her as I stared at the portal.
“Why wouldn’t I?” She indicated my body with a sweep of her hand. “You made yourself look like that.” She did the same to herself. “Just like how I made myself look like this.”
I studied her appreciatively. “Well, you did a very nice job.”
“Thanks.” Her eyes glittered with amusement. “Now, off you go.” With that, she shoved me lightly backward, and I felt like I was falling into oblivion. Every cell in my body tore themselves asunder, ripping and gnashing at me in the most violent way possible
Then I was on the other side, and as I tried to orient myself to where I was, I found myself standing next to Amy in what looked like the most generic office ever. It had a few pictures of modern art on the walls, and the desk lacked any of those personal touches you often saw in workplaces.
“Jesus fucking Christ, Roger. You gave me a heart attack.” Amy said, her chest heaving as she sucked in a few deep breaths in an effort to calm herself. “When did you learn to do that?”
“Smith took me, actually.” I smiled. “Sorry for startling you, but I was at the news building. I’d have never made it otherwise.”
“Why were you there?” Amy waved off the question. “And more importantly? Smith?”
“Yeah, apparently, McMahon has enough pull to get her to see me.” I shrugged. “So, we need to make sure this works.”
“That’s all you and your magic pen.” Amy stood and moved toward me. Then she adjusted my shirt vainly before frowning. “Can you make yourself look less like a clerk at the Buy More?”
“Ha ha,” I intoned as I grabbed my pen and made a few quick notes. In a moment, I was clad in a ten-thousand-dollar Italian suit, but that still had Amy frowning.
“Now you just look like a douchebag venture capitalist.” She sighed. “Sadly, I think that is probably the right look.”
“Probably so. I modeled it off that guy from Wolf of Wall Street.” I gave her a smarmy grin.
Amy gave me a gruff ‘heh,’ before nodding once. “Okay, let’s do this.”
“Right.” We moved to the office door, only as we opened it, I found security standing there. The two goons were nearly the size of mountains, and as their eyes swiveled toward us, confusion filled me. “Amy, did you hire security?”
“No.” She looked them up and down. “Get out of the way, we’re late for a meeting.”
“We’ve been informed by Mr. McMahon that you two are to be escorted from the premises,” the left one said, voice so high-pitched I figured he had to be able to knock out a monk seal with a single punch.
“And I’ve been informed that you can fuck right off,” I said, getting up in the speaker’s grill. “Go sit down and count to a million.” I pointed at the chair, and as I did, he blinked a couple times. Then he hurried by me and flopped down in the chair. His lips started moving as he counted.
“Wally, what are you doing?” the right one asked, confusion filling his voice as he looked from me to his partner and back again.
“Doing what he’s told.” I met his eyes. “So, unless you want to do so many sit-ups that you will quite literally shit yourself, you need to step aside.”
The man did what he was told without another word even though I didn’t use a voice command. It was weird because that felt pretty good.
“I thought you said Chet didn’t know?” I said the moment we were past them and moving down the hallway, Amy in the lead so she could show me to the meeting room.
“Evidently, the board likes him more than they let on.” She took a deep breath as we reached the door, and while I couldn’t see inside it or hear anything beyond, I was suddenly ready to go in there and kick ass.
�
��Well, that is one thing that’s about to fucking change,” I said, nodding fervently. “Anything in particular I need to say?”
“Not really. If you do, I’ll guide you through it.” Amy met my eyes then, moving a half-step to block my way. “You know, you could end this by telling Chet to donate all his money to a charity and then walk into traffic, right?” She gestured at the room behind us. “Why all this?”
“Because people need to know not to fuck with me. It’s not enough to win, really.” I sighed because I’d sort of wondered the same thing myself. “No. I need to show unequivocally that I am not to be fucked with. Otherwise, the next asshole will think he can take me.” I smiled. “They say in prison you find the biggest, baddest dude, and kick his ass. Think about what Chet has brought down on us. He’s pretty big. When I shank him in the yard and leave him to bleed out in front of everyone, well …” I spread my hands.
“I get that.” Amy sighed as she stepped out of my way. “I just wish there was a better way.”
“Me too,” I replied as I opened the door to find myself staring at a conference room containing only one man. Chet McMahon.
“Ah, Mr. Stevens,” Chet said amiably. “Unfortunately, today’s board meeting has been canceled.”
33
“Your mom’s been canceled,” I said in an amazing display of poise and maturity. “Your fictional mom. Not your real one. I’m sure she’s a very nice lady.”
“She’s dead and probably torturing Satan as we speak,” Chet said, moving around the table toward a cabinet at the far side. “Well, come in. We do have a meeting, don’t we?” He stopped at the cabinet and studied it for a moment. Then he grabbed a cup off the tray next to it and hurled it at us.
I grabbed Amy, pulling her out of the way as the glass shattered on the doorframe, spraying shards everywhere that bounced harmlessly off my suit.
“What the actual fuck?” I cried, one hand coming up as I readied my nano-fiber suit to produce a gun if need be. Or an energy bolt.
“Did you really think you could beat me?” Chet asked, glaring at me. “You’re a fucking amoeba.” He gestured at both of us. “She’s not even that. Something less. Protozoa?” He shook his head. “And, yet, somehow you think you can take my company?”
“I did take your company.” I crossed my arms over my chest. “And you have no idea what else I’m capable of.”
“It doesn’t matter.” He settled into a plush chair at the end and put his feet on the table. “See, you think you’ve won. That you’ve got me by the balls.” He mimed a ‘balls grabbing’ gesture. “But what you’ve got is nothing.”
He held up a finger. “Let me tell you how tomorrow goes. First, the Justice Department shuts down everything you own, and by the time they’re through climbing so far up your asshole you can taste them, I will purchase your entire holdings at a song.” He snapped his fingers. “What you’ve actually done is given me a way to buy my own shares back at a rock bottom price, so thanks for that.”
“Or I put your head on a pike in my lawn.” I moved forward and sat across from him at the table. “See, normally, I’d tell you to sell me your stuff, but I don’t want to do that.” I gestured to the surroundings. “I mean, I already own sixty percent of it, and there’s no way you can get that back from me.”
“You seem pretty cocky for someone who has never swum with the wolves.” He shook his head.
“Swam with the wolves?” I groaned. “Are you mixing metaphors or something?” I waved it off before I pulled out my pen and pad and wrote a quick note. “Not that it matters. I just don’t see how, with everything that’s happened, you think you can win.”
“Do you think you’re the first dickhead who has come after what I built?” He shook his head. “Because, the way I see it, you’re about to lose your gaming license, and your license to trade. You have numerous FTC violations coming.” He shrugged. “In a week, you’ll be on the refuse heap of history.” He looked at Amy. “And when that happens, I will take every one of your girls and give them an offer they won’t refuse.” He waggled his eyebrows. “Understand?”
As I stared at him, I knew I should have been angry, furious even, but really? I just felt like this man was pathetic. It wasn’t that he thought he could win when he couldn’t. It was more that he was right. He probably had been in this position before. He had pushed around people, bullied people, done all these things and gotten away with it, and still? Still, he had nothing that couldn’t be taken with the stroke of a pen.
“I understand that you’re speaking the English language.” I gestured to Amy over my shoulder. “Amy, how much money do you personally have?”
“A few hundred million, why?” she asked, and the strain in her voice let me know she was pissed off.
“You think you can just buy a girl who has that kind of scratch?” I arched an eyebrow. “I’m curious.”
“Lots of things more valuable than money.” Chet shrugged. “And that might not matter if some unsavory fellows were to say, find her alone somewhere.” He clapped his hands together. “Crazier things have happened.”
“Roger, throw him out the window.” Amy was practically shaking with rage.
“Is that what you really want?” I asked, looking at Amy. “Because if you do …?”
“No.” She shook her head. “Well, not yet. Not until his whole world is on fire, and the only thing he can do to escape the ruin of his life is to die. Then, I want you to look him in the eye and tell him no.”
“Okay.” I nodded to her before turning my attention to Chet. “Looks like you get to live.”
Chet started to say something, but before he could open his fat mouth, the door opened, and the board members filed into the room and took their seats in one wordless shuffle.
“What the fuck are you all doing here?” Chet cried, leaping to his feet as one old guy with a receding hairline and a pot belly looked at his fellows, clearly ignoring Chet.
“The emergency Board meeting is now in session. All those in favor of dumping Chet McMahon from his position as CEO and Chairman of the board, say aye.”
“What are you all doing?” Chet practically screamed as the unanimous assent came in. “This is my company, you traitors!”
“All those in favor of making Amy Soli the new CEO and Chairmen, say aye.”
I’ll be honest, the scream of rage that ripped from Chet McMahon in the moment of Amy’s ascent to the throne was one of the greatest sounds I’d ever heard.
“Motion passed. Meeting now adjourned.” Potbelly stood as did everyone else, and they filed wordlessly out of the room.
“I don’t know what you just did, or how you managed that,” Chet snarled, glaring at me. “But it won’t be enough to stop me.”
“You know what’s strange?” Amy asked, looking at me. “That there is this weird annoying screech in the room.” She snapped her fingers. “I think we need security to remove it.”
As she spoke, the two big men who had accompanied the board members surged forward and grabbed Chet by the arms.
“You can’t do this! I own you both!” he cried as they dragged his ass out, and as the door slammed shut, it was blissfully silent for a moment.
“So, what now?” Amy asked, looking at me as I wrote another quick note. “What are you doing?”
“Sorry, is it petty to give Chet lice? Because I totally just did that.” I smirked. “Also, his house just got flooded. Weird coincidence, right?”
34
“You know, there’s something strangely satisfying about watching that asshat get led from the courtroom in cuffs,” Amy said from her seat on the couch next to me as we watched the news proceedings two weeks later, which, oddly enough, had been covering the trial nonstop.
Evidently, when you spend a lifetime being a giant power-wielding douchebag and then suddenly lose all your money and assets in a single day, well, those people you pissed off will decide to fucking own you. It was like watching a feeding frenzy because people I hadn
’t even known existed started coming out of the woodwork.
“I know, right?” Skye elbowed me from her seat on the other side of me before giving me a conspiratorial wink. “I especially like that he had his bail denied.”
“Not that he could pay it.” Amy smirked evilly. “He has no money.”
“I don’t think that mattered after the prosecutor marched all those kids into the courtroom and sat them in the front row,” Skye added. “That was especially devious.”
“Yeah, wonder where he got that idea.” Amy and Skye shared a look, doing that unspoken communication thing they did before peering at me.
“Hey, I didn’t have anything to do with that, or the bail thing, or that verdict where he goes to federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison,” I said, raising my hands in defense. “I think that was all karma.”
“Uh huh,” they said in unison, and I could tell they didn’t really believe me.
“Anyway, I have a call to make.” Skye squeezed my knee. “Remember, you promised me a vacation, Roger.” She winked at me. “When I make reservations, I don’t want to hear any bitching.”
“I won’t complain at all.” I glanced at Amy. “Though you two need to work it out.”
“Oh, we have,” she replied as they smiled evilly at each other. “We think you will enjoy it.”
“So, what’s the plan then?” I gestured at the television as Chet was shoved into the back of a police van. “When are we going?”
“That’s the tough part,” Amy said as Skye left to make her call. “Everything is sorta fucked up still in Company Ink Land.”
“What do you mean?” I frowned and scratched my chin. “I mean, I know we got the hospital thing sorted out thanks to Gail, Maggie, and Ronnie’s work, but is there that much left to do now? Aren’t the water and power plants fixed too?”
To Vegas with love Page 16