“For him, maybe,” the senator took the glass from the bartender and offered it to me. “It’s on Beau, anyway.” As I took the glass and paused to inhale the scent, the senator turned back to Travis. “Pour one more, but add a splash of coke, please.”
“As you wish, sir.” Travis did as he was instructed and a moment later, the senator was holding his drink out to me.
“To rich fools and their money.” He clinked his glass against mine without mirth before draining it and rising to his feet. “See you at the party, Roger.”
36
“Who was that guy?” Gail asked as I approached with the drinks. “You didn’t seem like you liked him and now you’re frowning.” She moved toward me and held up a plate of food. “Can I cheer you up with some lobster? There are six kinds and all super yummy with butter.”
“I’ll feel better when this thing is over,” I said as I exchanged my two appletinis for Gail’s plate of food. “And don’t worry about him. He’s just a jackass.” I stuck a piece of lobster in my mouth, and as the flavor exploded across my tongue, I felt a lot better. I mean, money couldn’t buy happiness, but it could buy Icelandic lobster, and that was pretty much the same thing.
“He’s definitely someone to worry about.” Missy took a sip of her appletini as she watched the senator move through the crowd and pause just long enough to piss off every person he chatted with. “He’s basically going to be our next president.” She finished her drink. “Assuming he wants the job.”
“I’m guessing he’s corrupt?” Gail frowned, her eyes flitting from Missy’s now empty drink to the senator and back again.
“He’s like the definition of corruption.” She moved to set down the glass, but before she could, a waiter appeared beside her and took it from her.
“Would you like another?” he asked, flashing a movie star smile. “It would be my pleasure if you did.”
“Sure,” Missy said, not paying attention because she was too focused on the senator.
“Very good, ma’am.” He turned his attention to Gail. “Would you care for something else?”
“No, I’m good.” She held up her drink. “This will probably take me the rest of the trip. There’s a lot of tini in here.”
The waiter actually cracked a smile before nodding once and turning his attention to me. “Sir?”
“Some sparkling water, actually. Maybe a twist of lime?” I smiled.
“Very good. I will return shortly, but if you wish to move about, I will find you.” With that, he hurried toward the bar.
“So, as I was saying,” Missy said the moment he was out of earshot. “He’s ten pounds of corruption in a five-pound bag.” She glanced between us. “And while I recognize that’s pretty much the default position for senators, this guy takes the cake.” She frowned. “From everyone. It’s all for sale.”
“For now,” I said, watching him. “I suspect he won’t be much trouble though even if he did know my name.”
“If he knows who you are, you should be worried.” Missy tried to take a sip of her drink but realized she didn’t have one. Then as she looked at her hand in confusion, the waiter reappeared. “Thank you.”
“You’re very welcome.” He handed me mine.
“And tipping isn’t allowed?” I asked, taking a sip of mine. It was perfect.
“No, sir.” He shook his head like the idea disgusted him.
“Thought not.” I smiled. “Say, can you get me some chocolate ice cream?”
“It would be my pleasure.” He nodded and moved to get it.
“Ice cream?” Gail gave me a wry look. “I know you can eat whatever, but, come on. Don’t rub it in.”
“You can eat whatever too,” I said with a shrug. “And I like ice cream.”
“Ah, youth,” Missy said, finishing her drink. So much for not getting drunk, I guess. “If I look at ice cream, I’ll swell up like a blimp. Hell, one time I walked by a potato chip and my ass grew three sizes.”
“Well, I think your ass is perfect,” Gail said, giving it a quick swat. “What about you, Roger?”
“It’s definitely a grade A derriere.” I smirked as Missy flushed scarlet. “No complaints here.”
“In fact,” Gail said, taking Missy’s now empty hand, “I think we should explore this further. You know, just to make sure we have all the facts.”
“Not here.” Missy frowned, though she made no effort to move as Gail started to lead us toward one of the corner booths. “It’s way too public, and I have an image.”
“Dude,” Gail said, pointing across the deck with her drink. “That chick is literally blowing that dude at that booth over there. I mean, okay, they’re trying to be discreet, but I’ve seen enough blowjobs to know what they look like in public.”
I turned and was surprised to find she was right. “Wait … is she from Supersonic Leopards? Just imagine her with cat ears and purple hair.”
“I think she is!” Gail exclaimed, eyes widening as she watched the red-headed lead polish some knob. “And I think that’s Jake!”
“Oh my God, you’re right!” I said, suddenly sort of starstruck though I wasn’t sure why. “Guess we know who he picked, eh?”
“What are you two talking about?” Missy asked, glancing at the two of us, but making a point at not looking at the couple who obvious gave exactly zero fucks.
“Those are the stars of Supersonic Leopards. The movie made like a billion dollars. It was huge in Japan.” Gail extended her hands. “Huge.”
“Right, I’m not into anime or movies based on anime.” Missy shrugged. “And, wow, I seem to be out of appletini. I’m gonna grab a refill.” She pulled away and headed to the bar, eyes still fixed on the senator.
“Um … those are real people.” Gail pointed at them again, and as she did, Jake winked at her. “Not an anime.”
“It’s okay,” I said, taking her hand and leading her away so she wouldn’t keep staring. “Missy just doesn’t know what she’s missing out.”
“I just don’t know how she can even exist without knowing the joys of Supersonic Leopards.” Gail frowned. “It’s just not right.” She took a sip of her appletini and frowned. “This is now an appletini of lies instead of friendship.”
“Gail, it’s okay,” I said with a laugh. “I wouldn’t pass judgment until after she watches it.”
“That’s true … I just … do you think they’ll sign an autograph for me?” Gail looked to me. “Quick, make me a cool poster.”
“Um … they seem a little busy.” I smirked and waved a hand, signaling the closest waiter. “Say, do you have the Supersonic Leopards movie poster?”
“We do on the yacht, sir. Would you like one?” The waiter glanced at us while completely ignoring Jack who was clearly just about at his limit.
“Yes!” Gail said, and the waiter nodded before hurrying off. “I can’t believe I’m gonna meet Jack!”
“I dunno. From the look of things, I think he’s about due for a nap.” I watched the girl get up and wipe her mouth with the back of one hand. “And I think she’s gonna go clean up now.”
“I want to make a joke about that, but I think you might be right.” Gail frowned. “But I suppose we won’t even have the poster until we board the yacht.”
“You mean, the yacht right there?” I pointed behind her.
Gail turned, eyes going wide. “I know I say this all the time, but I always forget how big it is.”
37
“Beau, Bella, it is a pleasure as always,” I said, moving forward and shaking Beau’s hand while Bella gave Gail a Texas-sized hug. “I’m so happy you invited us.”
“I’m glad you could make it, what with all that going on in your neck o’ the woods,” Beau said, his handshake firm and confident but not over-powering. “Guess I was wrong when I said not to take on Chet McMahon. I’m not sure how you did it, but I’m damned proud of you.”
“Are you two really going to talk business the whole time?” Bella asked, frowning. “Hon
estly, it’s a party.”
“We’re businessmen, honey. Everything we do is business related.” He smiled, extending one hand toward the party. “Even this right here. All tax deductible, which is the best kind of tax.”
“Well, I just wish you hadn’t invited so many politicians.” Bella frowned. “It’s downright oily up here, and not in a good way.”
“That’s my fault, Bella,” I said, giving her my best apologetic look because I felt bad. “I asked Beau to get them here so that I could meet them all. On account of the Chet thing.” I paused a second as I realized Missy was still standing behind us and hadn’t let out so much as a word. That seemed odd, and as I turned, I found her staring wide-eyed at the party below. “And I’ve been rude. This is my friend, Missy Moppet. She’s really wanted to meet you both.”
“Missy Moppet?” Bella’s eyes widened. “You’re the one who did that story on those African death camps with the diamonds.”
That seemed to get Missy’s attention, and she turned back to Bella, beaming at the billionairess. “That was one of my first pieces. I’m surprised you’ve heard of it.”
“Of course, I heard of it. I almost stopped buying diamonds because of it.” Bella smiled. “Now I get only blood-free diamonds. They’re more expensive but worth it.” She extended her hand, revealing a ring with a rock the size of a dinosaur egg. “Don’t you think?” She didn’t wait for a response. “You must simply tell me all about it. Otherwise I’ll be stuck out here pretending to like all these blood-sucking politicians.”
“Off the record, of course,” Beau added, eyes filled with mirth as he watched Missy.
“Um … sure,” Missy said, clearly surprised that Bella knew her and was also not afraid but interested.
“Great, Gail, you come along too. The boys are gonna talk business anyway. I can tell from that look in Beau’s eye.” She gave her husband a once over. “I just know these things.”
“Well, that felt planned,” I said, watching Bella led the two a few feet away, giving Beau and me a bit of privacy. “Do you really know who Missy is?”
“We did after you asked us to invite her.” Beau stared at me. “Now, what’s this big plan to fix everything all about?” He gestured at the sea of politicians below, some of whom were looking to outdo Senator Ballerton with sheer douchebaggery. “’Cause not only is this is costing me a fortune, but it isn’t even fun.”
“I’m sorry about that, Beau, but you’ve got to trust me.” I sighed. “This is about to get really good.” I took a deep breath, readying myself to try something I never had before.
“I hope so, Roger.” Beau watched as a politician began getting a little handsy with the star from Supersonic Leopards, and I could already see Jack ready to pounce on the bastard. He didn’t, but I could tell it was hard. “These are the worst of the worst.”
“Yeah, that’s why they have to go.” I looked around. “Where’s that megaphone PA thing?”
“Over here.” Beau turned and led me toward a small device hooked to the wall of a room on our left. It looked like little more than a microphone, which I guess was basically what it was. “So, what’s this big plan, anyway?”
“Oh, you’ll see.” I picked up the microphone and tapped my finger against it, causing the thing to reverb in a way that made my ears scream in pain. Still, it did the trick, and a moment later, everyone was looking at me. Businessmen, politicians, drug lords. Everyone Beau knew who was corrupt as hell. They all stared up at me in confusion.
“Hello,” I called, waving to them. “I’d like to thank Beau for being a generous host and bringing you all here, so I could have a word with you all. Is everyone enjoying themselves?”
There were a few polite claps, but not as many as there should have been given the expense of the party. I mean, the bands on stage were real rock bands I’d only dreamed of seeing before I’d gotten my pen.
“Anyway, I’m sure you all want to get back to being the scum of the earth, so I’m going to make this quick.” I cleared my throat as Beau looked at me like I was crazy.
“What are you doing?” he mouthed, not because he wanted to stop me. He trusted me. No, because he was confused, which to be fair, was my fault.
“So, here’s what’s going to happen.” I smiled at them before glancing at Missy. I hadn’t originally planned on having her here, but since the ace reporter was, well, there was no reason not to take advantage of her presence. “Every single one of you corrupt bastards down there is going to immediately form a line on the left side of the yacht so you can confess all your corrupt little backroom dealings to Missy Moppet. After that, unless Missy tells you otherwise, you will head home, resign from your positions, and give every last penny of your ill-gotten wealth to charity. This includes hidden assets and offshore accounts. All of it has to go to charity. A real one. Not one of those fake ones you all use for tax evasion. Then you’re going to serve your time without lawyering up.” I clapped my hands.
I’d never been so pleased to hear a ping in my ears, and as I stared down at them, Beau gave me an astonished look as everyone below began walking toward the far wall of the yacht and lining up. Well, almost everyone. Some people weren’t corrupt, and they stayed there looking just as confused as Beau. That was fine though. I could take care of that later.
“Did you just do what I think you did?” Gail asked, hurrying over to me and taking my arm. She had a look on her face I’d never seen before, something between shock and awe.
“Why are they all leaving?” Beau asked as they all piled on the ferry to leave. “Is this because you told them to do it?”
“It is.” I nodded to the two of them before turning to Missy. “Can you do your thing?”
“Will this really work?” Missy said, confused. “I mean …”
“Roger, what’s going on?” Beau asked, concern filling his face as he watched the people down below. “Why are they doing what you say?”
“Beau, Bella, I love you both, but the thing is, I need you to tell you both the truth. See, I have a magic pen, and it lets me do pretty much whatever I want.” I pulled out my pen. “It also works with voice commands, and I just used it to, well …” I pulled out my pen and showed them the note.
Everyone on the yacht will obey my commands from when I utter the phrase “So, here’s what’s going to happen,” to when I clap my hands.
“That’s impossible.” Bella stared at me.
“No. It’s not.” Beau shook his head, an amused smile on his lips. “Roger, I knew you had that pen the moment I saw it at Monaco.” He shrugged. “I just didn’t know it could do this.”
“And you’re not upset?” I asked as Missy stared at us in disbelief.
“A magic pen?” she asked, swallowing hard. “Is that how you …? Did you use it on me?”
“Yes.” I frowned. “I made it so that you couldn’t lie to me.” I showed her the line in the pad I’d crossed out. “I crossed it out after our first day or so together though. So, I suppose you could lie to me if you wanted.”
“I don’t know how to feel about that, so we’re going to definitely talk about this later.” She sighed. “Of course, for me to get mad about it means I have to believe it’s real.” She blew a lock of hair out of her face. “And it is real, huh?” She turned to Gail as she spoke.
“It is. He used it to save my grandfather from cancer.” Gail looked at me. “He’s actually done a lot of good with it.”
“And a lot more now,” Beau clapped a hand on my shoulder. “You just made the world a billion times less corrupt, though there will be new people filling the vacuum you just made.”
“Well, not if I have anything to say about it,” I said, staring down at the line and wondering if maybe I’d overreached.
“What do you mean? Are you thinking of running for senator or something?” Beau asked, amused.
“Why stop at senator?” Gail asked, raising an eyebrow. “Why not president? Then you could really fix stuff.”
�
�If you really have this power,” Bella said, her blue eyes boring into me, “why not just be president of the world and fix everything?”
“Now, that, my dear, is a great idea,” Beau said, nodding at his wife. “Why not do that?”
“Um … why would you even want me to be president of the world?” I frowned. “All I’d planned to do was get some really good people in the proper places. People who could make a real difference and work for the common man instead of dickheads like Chet.”
“And that is exactly why you should be in charge.” Bella took my hands. “Because you don’t want to be.”
I looked around at everyone, at Gail’s smile, Bella’s hands still clutching mine, Beau’s supportive nod, and realized that maybe, just maybe, they were right. That the only way to make things right and to make them stay right for everyone was to do exactly what they said I should.
I might just have to take over the world.
Thank You for reading!
Curious about what happens to Roger next?
Find out soon!
Author’s Note
Dear reader, if you REALLY want to read my next Pen novel- I’ve got a bit of bad news for you.
Unfortunately, Amazon will not tell you when the next comes out.
You’ll probably never know about my next books, and you’ll be left wondering what happened to Roger, Skye, and the gang. That’s rather terrible.
There is good news though! There are three ways you can find out when the next book is published:
1) You join my mailing list by clicking here.
2) You follow me on my Facebook page or join my Facebook Group. I always announce my new books in both those places as well as interact with fans.
To Vegas with love Page 18