by Lynn Hunter
“I most certainly am.” Sam squeezed Johnathan’s shoulder.
Everyone chatted while Willa and Candace stood quietly off to the side looking a little lost. Willa stared at the floor while Dean stared at her.
“Good morning, Willa,” Dean said without a smile.
“Mornin’,” she nodded in his direction.
“Oh, Sarah,” Janie said, “I brought yeast rolls and ingredients for mimosas,” she smiled. “I usually only make them at Christmas but this seemed like the perfect occasion.”
“Wonderful! I’ll get glasses.” The two women chatted like long lost friends as they prepared drinks. At least, they weren’t brewing coffee. Her stomach still couldn’t handle the smell. Chatter began around the kitchen again as everyone got comfortable.
Sam never took his eyes off Lily. Looking for something to do she turned back to the potatoes only to see Willa and Candace had commandeered her station.
Her mom and Janie handed the mimosas around. “Orange juice for you,” her mom whispered.
The boys even got orange juice in a champagne glass complete with a strawberry garnish.
“A toast to new friends,” Sarah raised her glass and leaned into Glen’s side.
Everyone took a sip and still, Sam stared at her. He was making her so self-conscious just staring at her like that. Should she go talk to him? Lily wasn’t sure what to say even though she had weeks to think about it.
“Oh, Sarah, this house is so charming,” Janie praised then turned to Sam. “When do you close on it?”
Close on it? The room fell silent. Close on what?
“What?” Janie looked around the room. “Did I say something wrong?”
Sam patted his mom on the shoulder and turned back to Lily. His eyes took on a steely glint.
A cold sensation washed over her. Something was wrong. “What are you closing on, Sam?” She whispered, barely able to get the words out.
“Come on Derek, Johnathan, let’s go outside and play for a while.” She heard Candace’s voice from a distance.
“Lily-”
“Closing on what, Sam?” Numbness started to invade her body.
“This house,” he stated firmly. “I’m buying this house.” He crossed his arms over his chest and braced his feet apart as if expecting a fight. But she couldn’t fight him. He already bested her.
“You’re buying my home?” He’d been slowly taking her life from her control and she smiled and crawled into bed with him. She had no idea she should even be looking out for that kind of deceit. She trusted him.
He nodded. “Yes.”
Completely numb she let her gaze travel the room. There were so many guilty faces. Even her own mom. “Did you know?” she asked her, already knowing the answer.
“It’s not her fault, Lily. I asked her not to say anything.”
Tears stung her eyes. Maybe she wasn’t as numb as she thought. “You asked my mom to lie to me?” How could he do this?
“No. I wanted to tell you myself but you weren’t ready.”
“Ready? You’ve been lying to me the-”
He threw his hands up. “Yes, dammit! I’m a low down piece of shit who went around behind your back to give you everything you could ask for!”
Anger boiled “Asked for? Are you insane? I didn’t ask to be pregnant!” She heard a gasp and an “Oh, shit” from somewhere in the room.
Sam waved a hand. “That’s what I wanted. Bonus for you.”
She was incredulous. He was crazy. “Get out,” she snapped.
He folded his arms again. “No.”
She gave a bitter laugh. “That’s right! This is your house now.”
“Our house,” he corrected calmly. “I’m buying it for us. And so you would never have to leave it.”
“Oh, you’re the hero and I’m the damsel in distress I take it?”
He shrugged his broad shoulders indicating she could take it any way she wanted.
Unbelievable! She needed to get out of here. “Excuse me.” She turned and left the kitchen. She couldn’t stand to be in the same room with him.
Chapter 20.
Sam watched Lily leave the kitchen and started to go after her.
Alan grabbed his shoulder. “Give her a minute, son.”
“A minute? She’s had weeks.”
“Sam, honey, what have you done?” his mom asked, distress clear in her voice.
When he turned to Sarah, she looked pale and worried. “Don’t worry. I’ll fix it. Everything will be fine.” He would make sure of it.
“Should we leave?” Willa asked.
“No,” Sarah said, “we’re having Thanksgiving.”
“I think I’ll go talk to her.” Sarah pushed away from Glen.
“Let me go.” If Lily wanted to lash out at someone, it should be him.
“Are you sure?” his mother said, “I’m not sure she wants to talk to you right now.”
“Yeah,” Alan chimed in “Give her a while to cool off. Don’t push her.” He frowned at Sam. “She’s pregnant?”
“Yes.”
Alan whistled “You’re a real bulldozer, Sam. I’m thrilled to be a grandpa and all but you could have at least let her in on the plan.”
“Someone should probably go check on her,” Jake interrupted. “She’s probably tying bedsheets together to sneak out her window.”
Sam sighed. This was not how he wanted Lily to find out. He looked around the room, all his family and friends were here. His sweet mother let the cat out of the bag… in front of everyone. Lily probably felt like they were all ganging up on her.
As he headed for the stairs, his heart started to pound. What if she rejected him? She had every right to and there wasn’t anything he could do about it.
He knocked once on her door before walking in. She stood facing her bedroom window with her back to him and her arms wrapped tightly around her waist.
“Lily?” No answer. “Please turn around and talk to me.”
She slowly faced him and Sam’s heart caught. Her skin was so white it was almost translucent. He wanted to hold her and make her believe things would work out.
“What do you want, Sam?” She asked in a dull, tired voice.
“I want to talk to you about the house.”
“Why?”
“I told you-”
“No. Why did you do all of this?” she slowly swung her arm around to encompass the room.
“Why?” he slowly approached her. “You really don’t know?” Everyone else could see it. Why couldn’t she? He stopped just inches from her.
“I can’t imagine why you would do this to us,” she whispered shakily.
“I’m not doing it to you. I’m doing it for us.”
She shook her head and tried to step away before he gently wrapped his fingers around her upper arm and tipped her chin up.
“I love you, Lily.” His brow furrowed. “Don’t you know that?” She looked surprised. He never tried to hide his feelings from her. His eyes roamed over her sweet, innocent face. She didn’t know. Of course, she didn’t know. She didn’t know much about relationships and he didn’t outright tell her.
“If you loved me, why would you go behind my back to trap me? I thought things were going great.” Her eyes filled with tears. “I was falling in love with you.” Tears spilled over and down her cheeks and he gently wiped them away.
“Come sit down,” she looked ready to drop. They both sat on the edge of the bed. “Why would you be upset that I’m buying the house?”
“You did it behind my back.”
“You weren’t ready to know and if I waited then someone else would have bought it. I couldn’t let that happen.” He lifted her small, soft hand into his large calloused one. Her fingers were cold and he rubbed them between his own fascinated by the difference in their skin tone and texture. His skin was rough and tanned where Lily’s was like creamy silk. Loving the feel of her skin he rubbed harder before realizing, whenever they touched, he couldn’t stop
himself from rubbing, grabbing or…being rough with her in general. Once he felt her smooth skin, he couldn’t seem to control his urges. That never happened to him with any other woman before.
“Do I hurt you, Lily? When we make love, am I too rough?” he asked huskily.
Her face immediately glowed red and she became extremely interested in a tiny hole in her jeans.
“I need to know,” he couldn’t stand the thought of causing her pain.
Not looking at him, she shook her head. “No.”
He wasn’t sure he believed her but decided to take extra care not to hurt her next time. If there was a next time. Sam forced his mind away from making love and back to the matter at hand.
“I didn’t tell you about the house because I knew you would be upset. What would you have said if I told you I was buying the house a week after I met you?”
“I guess we’ll never know.” She cut her eyes to him.
Sam accepted the pointed dig. “You were so upset and worried about leaving the house and working without sleep. I wanted to make life better for you, give you whatever made you happy.”
She snatched her hand away and stood to face him with her hands on her hips. “You’re quite the hero aren’t you, Sam?”
“I want to be your hero.” That plan backfired.
Surprise lit her face again. He saw that look on her face a lot lately. “I want to fix anything that doesn’t go your way, Lily. Be honest,” he continued, “what would you have said if I told you right after we met that I would buy the house so you don’t have to leave?
She turned away and walked slowly back to the window. Evidently, she wasn’t going to answer.
“You would have told me I was crazy and to stay away from you,” he answered for her.
“Like I said, we’ll never know,” she muttered.
“Trust me,” he said, “that’s what you would have said.
“Oh really? You know me so well and you’re so experienced with women that you know how we all think?”
As soon as he opened his mouth she pointed at him and snapped. “Don’t answer that. You’ll just piss me off.” She was getting worked up but, at least, she was talking to him.
“Just because I’m young and inexperienced with men doesn’t mean I’m fragile or don’t know my own mind.”
“At the time you seemed fragile to me and I wanted to fix everything for you.”
“Stop with the hero crap, Sam. I had a right to know! When were you going to tell me?” Her eyes bore into him waiting for an answer.
Good question. He braced his elbows on his knees. “After you fell in love with me.”
Lily was speechless. That wasn’t what she thought he would say. She figured he would play hero again.
“You bought our house and got me pregnant without telling me, hoping I would fall in love with you?”
“Yeah,” he replied without hesitation.
If she wasn’t so angry and hurt, she would have laughed. “That was a terrible plan,” she said. Maybe he was crazy. She often wondered why a seemingly perfect guy like Sam wasn’t married yet. Now she knew.
“I’m beginning to think you’re right,” he ran a hand through his hair. He always did that when he was frustrated.
“Did you ever think to tell me you loved me first?” Could he not understand how terrible his plan was?
His brow furrowed “What do you mean?” He was studying her like she was a puzzle he couldn’t figure out.
She huffed and rolled her eyes. “You could have told me you loved me first before concocting your backward plan.”
He stood to his full height towering over her. “Would it have mattered? If I told you how I felt about you? If I told you I wanted a future with you, would you have listened?”
She stared up into his face. There was no expression but his blue eyes looked anxious. “I knew there was something special between us, Sam. I’ve been single all these years by choice.” She was so out of her element here. But knowing Sam was too made her feel less uncomfortable. “You never gave me a chance.”
“I was afraid you wouldn’t want me. You kept saying you couldn’t handle one more thing.” He tipped his head back and regarded the ceiling for a moment. “You were so stressed out. I really did think that if I eliminated the stress you could focus on me.”
Lily heard the sincerity in his voice.
“I couldn’t handle not being with you. In a short time, you became everything. And the way Johnathan looks at me makes me feel ten feet tall.” He dropped his chin and narrowed his eyes at her. “He does think I’m a hero. I don’t know why his mom is so stubborn.”
She couldn’t hold back her smile. “I did think you were wonderful.”
“I’m still wonderful. Just give me a chance to prove it to you, Lily. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you and Johnathan.”
He loved her. She could see it in his eyes and hear it in his deep voice.
“If you need more space I can give it to you. Anything you want.” He gently brushed the curls away from her face and placed a soft kiss on her forehead before turning to the door. He paused before turning the handle. “I’m sorry, Lily. I love you so much and I got desperate. I’d never do anything to deliberately hurt you. Please forgive me.”
Lily stared at the door for several long minutes after he left the room. He had to love her. Why would he go through all this trouble to make the world right for her unless he loved her? His method wasn’t brilliant. She caressed her stomach. He gave her another baby. Her vision became blurred. Johnathan was going to have a sibling and father. She could… have a husband she loved. Loved. That’s why his deception hurt so much. Because she loved him. Tears spilled onto her cheeks. Why did love have to feel like this? Why was it so scary? When she was dating John she was happy but it was scary. When he died, it was so painful. But everything in between was wonderful. She loved John so much. People might not think a teenager knew real love but they do. The love was real and the pain was real. She lost him but still had part of him. She saw his boyish smile every time she looked at their son.
Lily paced back to the window. Now she had a piece of Sam growing inside her. But Sam was still here and he loved her. Lily smiled. He must love her because he said please forgive me and I’m sorry in the same conversation. He also said them without prompting.
A movement in the yard caught her attention. She saw Sam walking to his truck. He was leaving! He said he would give her space and he was keeping his word. Her heart thundered in her chest. Panic sent her flying down the stairs. She had to catch him. He couldn’t leave, she needed him. All this was his fault and he needed to see it through. She rushed through the kitchen dodging people to get to the door.
“Lily, what the-” her mom began.
Lily looked around until she saw her worried face. “It’s okay, Mom, I just need to stop Sam,” she jerked open the door.
“But he’s-”
She took one running jump down the steps and crashed into a hard chest.
“What the hell?” Sam shouted.
His arms tightened protectively around her and they were briefly air born before hitting the ground. Sam angled his body to keep her from landing hard on him or the ground. He protected her without thought, as though it were natural for him. Of course, he would. She never should have doubted him.
Lily blinked and tried to shake the dazed feeling out of her brain. Sam’s hands ran up and down her sides.
“Are you okay?”
Her eyes focused on his worried face. “Yes. I think so. Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Why are you trying to mow me down?”
Lily climbed higher up his body. “I was trying to stop you from leaving.”
He touched her face with gentle fingers. “I wasn’t leaving,” he said in a low voice.
”You weren’t? But I saw you leaving,” her face started to heat with embarrassment.
He shook his head and his smile stretched wide. “I was getting the yeast
rolls out of the truck.”
Yeast rolls? She looked around and saw beautifully baked rolls littering the ground around them and an overturned foil pan.
“I’m so sorry,” she tried to scoot off his chest but he held her still. “I didn’t mean to knock you down.” She was humiliated. Everyone saw her make a total fool of herself.
“You tackled me to the ground to stop me?” He looked a little too smug.
“You said you were going to give me space,” she defended. “I saw you leaving.”
He raised an eyebrow. “I was giving you space.”
“Going downstairs is giving me space?”
“Where did you expect me to go?”
“Uh, your house?
He shook his head. “Why were you trying to stop me?” His fingers tunneled into her hair. His eyes looked so hopeful and it gave her strength. She wiggled higher and brought her lips close to his.
“I love you, Sam.”
He squeezed his eyes shut and his hand tightened in her hair. “Don’t say it unless you mean it.” His gaze bore into her demanding the truth. “I need it too much. I need you too much.”
Lily dropped a light kiss on his firm lips. “I love you, Sam. I need you too.”
He squeezed the breath out of her. “Thank God.”
“Mom? What are you doing?” Johnathan asked curiously.
Lily looked up from her spot on Sam’s chest to see Johnathan. Candace and Derek walking across the yard in their direction.
Sam sat up taking her with him. “Oh, honey,” she slowly got to her feet, “we fell.”
“Are you okay?”
She wrapped him in a hug. “Yes. We’re very okay.” Lily realized it was true. Everything was going to be okay.
Rick peeked out the door. “I guess I need to make yeast rolls too,” he muttered.
Sam ruffled Johnathan’s hair. “Well, little man, what do you think about me asking your mom to marry me?”
“I think that’s a great idea!” he smiled shyly. “You can be my dad, you know if you’re married to my mom,” he shrugged, “if you want.”
“I want that. Very much.” Sam wrapped them both in a hug. He was strong and steady. Lily still couldn’t believe he wanted her.
“I’m a lucky man,” he whispered to them. “I don’t know how I ever got along without you two.”