by Meghan Sloan
That was the problem. Cassandra had no idea. She was still trying to get her head around the fact that Gabriel had engineered all of this. He had purposefully tried to push her and his brother together, to the point it was almost his main goal. He wanted them together for some reason, but for the life of her Cassandra was stuck.
Whatever it was, Gabriel hadn’t changed. He wasn’t able to keep his hands to himself even with his determination to put her and his brother in the same room. Cassandra felt the heat tightening the knot in her stomach and pushed it away. Now was not the time to be thinking about how Gabriel could make her body crave more of him when she was standing in front of his brother, the man he had been trying to palm her off onto.
“Look, why don’t you and your aunt come inside?” Percy suggested. “Mother and Father will be back soon. We can have tea and then you can head home. Unless you want to stay for a while.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
Cassandra considered it. It sounded like a good offer to take right now. With everything going on, she wasn’t quite ready to go back to Ipswich just yet. Or come into contact with Gabriel.
Because when she did, Cassandra had a lot of questions for him.
Chapter 18
Gabriel finished his drink and put it on the bar, swallowing back a belch.
“Same again, Barrington.”
But the landlord frowned at him as he took the empty glass.
“I think I should cut you off after this one. You’re going to get drunk, and I’m sure you haven’t got the money for this.”
Gabriel glared at him.
“Do I look like I care?” he snapped.
For a moment, he thought Barrington was going to snap back. Gabriel hoped so; he was spoiling for a fight. But the other man sighed and turned away.
“This is the last one, though. No more.” He filled the glass and placed it in front of Gabriel. “You can go home after this.”
“Spoilsport.”
Barrington shook his head and walked away. Gabriel picked up his glass and headed towards the empty table in the corner. He slumped onto the chair and scowled at the room. The place was relatively busy, being a Thursday night, with several people having a drink before going into Montgomery’s. Gabriel wouldn’t be joining them, mostly because he knew that as soon as Norman saw him looking drunk and angry, he would kick him out again.
Maybe having one more drink and going home would be a good idea.
But that wouldn’t stop the thoughts. His dreams. Gabriel had hardly been able to sleep because his dreams were filled with images of Cassandra. Pretty much all of them ended up with Cassandra naked, in his bed. Under him, over him, on her belly, on her back, whichever way he could think of.
He made her cry out his name every time, leaving Gabriel waking up sweating and with an erection that would not go down. He had had to force Allen to stay out of his room while he dressed so his valet wouldn’t see the state he was in.
Gabriel had overstepped himself. He knew that the first time he kissed Cassandra. But that second time, he shouldn’t have let his arousal take control. When Cassandra started teasing him, he should have taken a step back and kept his distance. Got out of there as soon as possible. And yet, he just couldn’t. He wanted her, naked and wrapped around him as he held her into a climax. She was certainly very hot in her responses. Gabriel liked it when a woman was vocal.
But this wasn’t just any woman. This was Cassandra Seton. His brother’s woman. A woman who was now off-limits. Gabriel should never be left in a room alone with her. Hell, he shouldn’t even be seeking her out. But common sense disappeared whenever he thought about her.
His control had slipped, and Gabriel knew he was gone. He wanted her badly. Even before he kissed her, he had wanted Cassandra. Now that ache was more intense, more painful. He couldn’t push it aside.
She’s not your woman. You need to remember that.
Easier said than done.
“Mr. Tattershall.”
Gabriel looked up. Emily was standing by the bed, watching him with a stony expression. She eyed the glass in his hand and arched an eyebrow.
“I take it you decided that it was a good time to break your stance on drinking with very little money.”
Gabriel growled.
“I’m not getting into that with you, Miss Barrington. Have you come to tell me what I should and shouldn’t do as well? Because if you have, I’m going to say now I’m not hearing it.” He shot a glare towards the bar, “Your father’s already done that to me all evening.”
“He is concerned. You are drinking a lot more.”
“And that is nobody’s business but my own.”
If Emily knew the reason he was drinking more was to try and get rid of thoughts of Cassandra - hell, if anyone knew why - Gabriel would be considered somewhat mad. Especially when it wasn’t working.
“Father doesn’t know I’m in here.” Emily glanced towards the bar, which was hidden by a sea of people putting down their various orders, “I have a message. You have someone who wants to talk to you. In private.”
“Who is it?”
Emily didn’t respond. Gabriel didn’t need to guess. He sat up.
“It’s Cassie, isn’t it?”
Why did he have to sound so excited about that? Only a moment ago, he was telling himself to keep his distance. Now he was like a boy again. Emily leaned over and placed something on the table.
“She has something that you need to hear.” Her voice was low but somehow loud enough for Gabriel to hear it over the noise. “Room Five in the guest house out the back is empty. It’s the furthest away from the other rooms. You’ll have some privacy for what she has to say.”
“That sounds like a promise.”
Emily frowned.
“That’s not what Cassie has in mind. But it’s the only place you can talk without anyone bothering you. Go out the front and then around the side so my parents don’t get suspicious.” She paused and shot Gabriel a warning look. “And don’t you dare break her heart.”
Then she hurried away. Gabriel stared after her, and then down at the key on the table. Cassandra wanted to meet. In private. He should have given the key back to Emily and told her that no, he couldn’t do that. If she had to meet with him, Gabriel would insist upon a chaperone. One who would make sure they didn’t do something that either of them regretted.
But that didn’t stop the aching in his chest.
Putting his half-empty glass aside, Gabriel rose to his feet and dropped the key in his pocket. Then he headed towards the door, waving to Barrington as he left. The landlord jerked his head in response before turning away. Probably relieved that Gabriel was leaving. While he wasn’t a rowdy drunk, Gabriel was sure he was an irritating one. Especially when everyone knew he wasn’t supposed to be drinking when he had very little to drink with.
Cassandra just wanted to talk. He should be trying to remember that. But Gabriel could only feel his longing building as he went around the back of the public house. He itched to get his hands on her, to pull her into his arms where he wanted her. There certainly wouldn’t be a lot of talking going on if he did that.
He needed to stop. This was more than likely Cassandra telling him that they needed to keep their distance. That she was going to make it work with Percy. That was the right thing to do, and Gabriel couldn’t fault her for that. But the thought of Cassandra getting married to his brother made Gabriel felt like he had a lead weight in his stomach. He didn’t want that to happen.
Give it up, Gabe. You don’t have anything to offer her. Why do you think you’re any better? Hear her out and then leave. That’s all you need to do.
Having said that, her choice of meeting place wasn’t exactly ideal. A private room in one of the guest houses behind the public house. They were a collection of small houses and each was occupied mostly by guests coming from London or on their way to London. Another way for Barrington to make his money. From wha
t Emily said, the room they were going to use was going to be in a house where nobody would disturb them.
Nobody would hear them.
Stop it. Don’t think like that.
Gabriel used the key to get into the house and closed the door behind him. There was a small living room area and a kitchen with the three bedrooms upstairs. Gabriel listened, and he could hear someone moving around upstairs. Taking a deep breath, he climbed the stairs and looked in the first bedroom. Nobody was there. He tried the second bedroom.
Cassandra was there, pacing around beside the narrow bed. She was wringing her hands and it sounded like she was muttering to herself. Her hair was loose about her shoulders, her dark green dress looking almost black in the light from the candle by the bed. Her expression was pinched, almost as if she was trying not to cry.
She was upset. Gabriel wanted to go to her and hold her, but he didn’t. Bracing himself, he closed the door behind him.
Cassandra spun around, her eyes widening when she saw him. Gabriel leaned on the door. It was either that or reach for her.
Why did she have to make him meet in this room? Downstairs would have worked. This felt far more...intimate.
“Cassie.”
“Ga...Mr. Tattershall.”
“We’re in a bedroom and you’re still addressing me formally?”
Cassandra bit her lip and smoothed her hands down her skirts. Was she blushing? Gabriel couldn’t really tell with her face half-bathed in flickering light.
“I didn’t come here for that.”
“Why are we here, then?”
“Because I didn’t want us to be overheard, and we can’t exactly meet at my home or your cottage. Not when people talk.” Cassandra glanced towards the window, “Emily’s the only one who knows where I am.”
Was that a warning? Gabriel didn’t know. He just waited, gripping onto the door handle so he didn’t give in to striding across the room and kissing her. The need for her was stronger this time, maybe due to the proximity of that awful-looking bed. It was curling in his stomach and spreading through his body. Especially down. His erection was pressing against his trousers, and Gabriel had to grit his teeth against the discomfort.
Just a few minutes, and then you can go. That’s all.
“I…” Cassandra lifted her chin and squared her shoulders, “I thought I’d tell you about Percy.”
“I see.”
Gabriel braced himself. She was going to be telling him that Percy had proposed to her. It was a little fast, Gabriel had to admit, but that was Percy. Once his nerves were dealt with, he went out and got what he wanted. It shouldn’t be a surprise that his little brother had proposed marriage to Cassandra. She could certainly complement him, and it meant that his plan to get her distracted was working.
But it’s not working, is it? You’re not getting Cassandra Seton distracted. You’re getting yourself distracted.
“I ended our courtship this afternoon.”
Gabriel blinked. That he had not been expecting. He stared at her.
“You what?”
“He...I…” Cassandra swallowed and looked away. “I told him that I didn’t love him. Not like that. He would be a good friend, a good brother for me, but I can’t love him as I should a husband.”
That should not have had Gabriel wanting to punch the air. He should be disappointed that his plan wasn’t working. And things had been looking up, apart from Gabriel suffering from the desire to have Cassandra for himself. He swallowed and tried not to look so relieved.
“And what did my brother say to that?”
“He accepted it graciously. He had suspected something, but he didn’t try to stop me.” Cassandra’s eyes narrowed. “So, what was your plan with us?”
“My plan?”
“Yes, your plan.” Cassandra stepped towards him. “You told me that Percy saw him and wanted to get to know me, but Percy said you claimed I wanted to know him more. What were you up to, Mr. Tattershall? What was your plan?”
Did she suspect something? Gabriel searched her face, but couldn’t see anything that gave him a definitive answer. He wasn’t about to tell her that he had tried to get her distracted with a young man who could sweep her off her feet; that would have Cassandra slapping him. He could, at least, be honest about the essential plan. She didn’t need to know about the end goal.
Not yet, anyway.
“What I said about my brother is true. He’s very shy when it comes to women. Socially awkward, as I’m sure you’ve noticed. He messes it up if he tries himself, and our parents want him to get married. So, I decided to pick out a girl for him and make it sound like she wanted to get to know him.” He shrugged, “I was just trying to play matchmaker for my little brother, and I guess it didn’t work.”
That was as close to the truth as he was willing to go. Cassandra still looked suspicious. She tilted her head to the side and regarded him closely.
“But why me?”
“I saw you, and I knew you would be perfect. And you are,” Gabriel grimaced, “but not for my brother, apparently.”
“Then for whom? Who would you say I was perfect for?”
She was going to make him say it. Gabriel should leave right now before he drew himself in any deeper. But it was too late for that; he was already in too deep. And with his next words, he was going to be wearing his heart on his sleeve. Cassandra would be able to see everything.
He closed his eyes and knocked his head back against the door.
“Me. I’d say you were perfect for me. But at the same time, you’re too perfect for me. Someone I can’t have.”
That was as close as he could get to it without saying how he really felt. Gabriel braced himself for Cassandra’s laugh, scoffing at his admission and telling him that it wasn’t going to happen. He was ready for the rejection.
But there wasn’t one. There was a rustling of skirts, and then he felt those skirts brushing against him. Fingers brushed against his jaw, and Gabriel opened his eyes to find Cassandra standing right in front of him. She didn’t look shocked or outraged at his response. She looked...curious.
“Why do you say that I’m too perfect for you, Gabriel?”
Gabriel. He loved how she said his name. Gabriel knew he should pull away or he was going to lose hold of his control altogether. But he couldn’t. Not when Cassandra was touching him like this.
“Because you’re too honest, Cassie. You’re too good, too compassionate. For the first time in my life, I didn’t want to blacken a woman’s name with my reputation. Those I have had affairs with I’ve kept discreet - apart from one obvious one, of course - but I knew if it came out that I had taken you as…” he winced, “well, the scandal after that would destroy you. I didn’t want to do that to you.”
“You wanted to keep me innocent.”
It wasn’t a question. Cassandra didn’t even look horrified. It was as if she had accepted it already. Gabriel swallowed.
“Yes. I love your fire, I love your passion, and I love your compassion for other people and your wit. What have I got for you? I’m an ex-gambler, a drunk, disowned from my own family because I took it too far. I’ve got nothing to offer you. I don’t think I ever will.” He looked away. This hurt to say it out loud. “I’ll never be good enough for you.”
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