First Love

by Amy Brent

  “No!”

  “Max, listen to your father,” Michael said. “Now, finish that statement.”

  “Finish! Finish! Finish!” Max chanted.

  “Max, calm down or I’m taking you home,” I said.

  “I don’t wanna,” Max said.

  “Eat your pizza and settle down, or you won’t get dessert,” I said.

  “Ooooh, dessert. Better behave, Max. I wanna eat dessert with my best bud,” Michael said, smiling.

  I sighed and leaned back into my chair while Max started to eat slower, but my mind was still racing. I could lose my license if this ever got out. It could destroy everything I’d worked for. The whole reason why I married that pretentious bitch in college could all go down the drain if it ever got out that I was fraternizing like this with one of my clients.

  “Here’s my advice,” Michael said.

  “Oh, here we go.”

  “Shut up and listen. Transfer her. To me, or to David, or to anyone else in the office. I’ve never seen you like this before with another woman. And it’s a good look on you. There’s no reason for you to keep risking your job if you still have feelings for her,” he said.

  “But we are making very good progress in her sessions,” I said.

  “But professionally, you know this isn’t right. You could ruin everything, especially with this book tour coming up. Shit always comes out during book tours. It’s practically Murphy’s Law. Even if she just temporarily changes hands, you know that’s what you have to do.”

  “I don’t even know where to go from here, honestly,” I said.

  “Well, when did you see her last?” he asked.

  “This morning,” I said.

  Michael hooked his gaze onto mine, and his face slowly fell. I groaned, putting my face in my hands as Max reached for his second slice of pizza. I knew what was running through Michael’s head, and I knew the tightrope I was walking was slowly caving underneath the pressure of my body.

  But this was Melissa. The woman who got away.

  “Transfer her,” Michael said. “That’s the first thing. But have you considered apologizing?”

  “For what?” I asked.

  “This whole Russia thing,” he said as he side-eyed Max.

  “We did talk about that in our last session,” I said.

  “Did you apologize?” he asked.

  “No. I told her what happened and why I did it, but I don’t remember if I apologized or not. That session was a bit of a whirlwind.”

  “Then, start there. Call her and have a conversation with her. Be honest and upfront. Apologize for all the crap you put her through when you entered into that deal, and then explain to her the bind you’ve put yourself in. She seems like an intelligent woman. I’m sure she’ll understand.”

  I knew what Michael was telling me was true. All of it. I had a great deal of apologizing to do with her. She needed closure in order to process these things, and sometimes, simple knowledge didn’t cut it. Sometimes just knowing didn’t cut it. But I didn’t know if I could give up our sessions. I enjoyed seeing her. I enjoyed ending my Mondays with her. I thought we were making tremendous progress, and I thought it was helping her to talk to someone who had been involved in the events that led up to her walking into my office for the very first time.

  “Call her, Brandon,” Michael said. “Don’t jeopardize your career. If she cares about you the way you obviously care about her, she wouldn’t want you to throw all this away.”

  “I know. I know.”

  “I’ve never seen you act this way with a woman before, and I’m happy for you. But you need to tread lightly. I don’t want to see you get hurt, not when it’s so obvious how you feel.”

  “I get it. I hear you. All right?” I asked.

  “Why are you upset?” Michael asked.

  “I’m not upset.”

  “Guess again, head doctor. Now, why are you upset?”

  I peeled my head from my hands and looked over at Max. He was completely oblivious, covered in pizza sauce while he colored in his coloring book. Watching him color threw me back to the day he was born, the day I first held him in my arms. I remembered his first step, his first word, the first time he peed in the toilet, and the first time he got sick. I remembered our first hospital trip and his first day of daycare. His first shot and his first scraped knee.

  My boy deserved better than what he was given. My boy deserved better than the life I’d brought him into.

  “He deserved better,” I said.

  “Then give him better,” Michael said. “Call her and start the road to better.”

  Chapter 18

  Melissa

  I would love to take you out again if you’ll let me.

  I read his message over and over on my lunch break. I couldn’t believe it. I was giggling like a little schoolgirl as I scrolled through my phone and called Carl’s parents. I wanted to know if they would be willing to keep Sarah again, and I was ecstatic when they told me they wouldn’t mind. They said something about a movie night and caramel popcorn, but I wasn’t paying attention. All I could think about was going out with Brandon again.

  “It’s wonderful you’re getting out like this,” Joanne said.

  “Thanks, Joanne. I appreciate it. I honestly didn’t know how it would come off. You know, with everything that’s happening,” I said.

  “Can I be candid with you, dear?” she asked.

  “Of course. You can say anything to me. You know this.”

  “I’m glad you’re putting yourself back out there again.”

  “You are?” I asked.

  “Melissa, our son loved you. You were his entire world. But when he died, you crumbled. Mark and I watched you crumble for months, and we had no idea how to help. You’ve grieved too long, sweetheart. He’s been gone almost three years.”

  “I know.”

  “And I want you to know something. We are Sarah’s grandparents, and we know you would never introduce her to someone who you thought would do her harm. Whoever you choose to spend your life with, if anyone, will be embraced wholly by us,” she said.

  “Wh-what?”

  “You need a support system, and it sounds like you’re slowly piecing one together. Melissa, you were the daughter I never got to have. Not only is it time for you to move on and find your own slice of happiness, but I want to rejoice in that happiness with you. Take your time. Have fun tonight. We can keep Sarah into the afternoon, if you’d like. Plus, Mark likes watching morning cartoons with Sarah. It’s sort of their thing.”

  “Thank you so much, Joanne,” I whispered.

  “Enjoy yourself tonight. We’ll pick up Sarah from school.”

  I sent Brandon a message telling him tonight would be wonderful. I squealed with delight, excited about the prospect of kissing Brandon again. All week I’d felt the ghost of his lips upon mine, and now the idea of sharing that again shivered me to my bones.

  He picked me up and took me to Sushi Gen. I hadn’t had sushi in years, and I hummed with each bite I put upon my tongue. Brandon looked incredible in his tailored suit. The light blue of his tie matched his eyes, and the black-on-black suit and button-down shirt made me want to reach out and rip it off him. He smiled at me, watching me eat as I took bite after bite of luxurious fish. But then, he said something that caught me off guard.

  “I’m sorry.”

  I stopped chewing and put my chopsticks down.

  “For what?” I asked as I swallowed.

  “For everything.”

  “You’ll have to be a bit more specific,” I said, giggling.

  “For Anfisa,” he said.

  I felt my neck flush with shock as my mind began to slowly turn over what he was doing.

  “Was that her name?” I asked.

  “Yes. It was,” he said. “And I’m sorry.”

  I watched this hollowed out sorrow carve itself out behind his beautiful eyes. The sparkle behind them faded into an empty storm cloud. It surged over his f
ace and pulled his shoulders taut. It tainted his manhood as he sighed and sat back in his chair. It was the first time I’d ever seen the confident Brandon Black succumb to something other than pride.

  “Thank you for apologizing,” I said lightly.

  “What I did to you was wrong. I should’ve been upfront with what I was doing. I should’ve trusted you with it. I should’ve known you wouldn’t have done anything to jeopardize what we were—”

  I held my hand up to stop him before I reached over and took his hand. I squeezed it twice, calming his nerves as he looked deeply into my eyes.

  “Thank you for apologizing,” I said, grinning.

  When we got into his car after dinner, I realized we weren’t headed back to my place. I watched the streets roll by as we navigated a part of town I wasn’t familiar with, but the moment we pulled into the driveway, I knew where we were. His house suited him wonderfully. Spacious but not overbearing. Prideful but not boastful of his wealth. It had a wraparound porch he had decorated with chairs and tables and hardwood floors that gleamed even in the moonlight.

  But I didn’t get a good look before he crashed his lips into mine.

  Clothes fell to the floor as we stumbled up the steps. His hands were everywhere, cupping my breasts and tugging at my dress. His tongue was on fire, sending ricocheting flames lapping over my body. We both fell to his bed in a heaping pile of skin, my hands dancing across his chiseled muscles as my body was bared for him.

  His lips placed openmouthed kisses down my neck before he wrapped his lips around my nipple. My hands ran through his hair, feeling his soft tendrils curling around my knuckles as my hips rolled into his. His hands roamed my body, taking in every curve and dip as his tongue flicked across my breasts.

  I’d grown slick with moisture sliding down the crack of my ass as my legs splayed open for him.

  I felt him nuzzling against my skin, his hands digging into my hips. My body trembled with nerves as he approached the stretch marks littering my stomach, and for a split second, I thought about pulling away. I thought about reaching up and cutting off the light, just so he wouldn’t have to take in the purples and reds that tore against my skin.

  But the moment he got to them, he kissed every single one. His tongue drew outlines, leaving glistening marks behind as his hands slowly parted my thighs. I was panting. Gasping for air as his lips finally descended onto my pussy. My clit throbbed for him, swollen beyond its hood and ready for release.

  “You’re more beautiful than I ever dreamed you would be.”

  He said it like a secret. A mumble to himself, as if he was trying to convince himself this was happening. His tongue slowly slid in, flicking my clit as I jumped against his lips.

  I wanted him to do it again.

  He scooped some of my juices into his mouth and swallowed me whole. I looked up and groaned, taking in his mound of thick brown hair as he buried his face into my pussy. His tongue lapped and swirled, touching all the right places as my pussy poured out juices onto his cheeks, and by the time I was approaching my end, my legs were locked around his head.

  “Please, Brandon. Don’t stop. Shit, that feels so good. Oh fuck. You’re so good. Yes.”

  I pulled him closer to me as my toes began to curl. My legs pulled taut as his lips sucked at my clit, and suddenly, my body began to shudder. I shook at his mercy, my legs going still as my body trembled for him. I could feel my tits bouncing as he hummed into my wetness, and the moment he pulled back, I knew I wanted all of him.

  In this very moment, I wanted nothing more than to be his.

  I ripped him up by his hair and pulled his lips back onto mine. I rolled him over and straddled him, my pussy lips engulfing his cock as his tip stroked against my sensitive clit. My hands pressed into his chest as I watched his glistening face, his tongue darting out to lick up all of me off his face.

  “I’m on the pill, in case you’re wondering,” I said.

  “Are you sure about this, Melissa?” he asked. “Because this doesn’t have to happen. I’m completely content just lying here with you.”

  His hands stroked my thick thighs, making my entire body shiver. If he only knew what his touch did to me, what it had always done to me. My eyes fluttered shut as I raised off his hips, and without another word, I grabbed his cock and positioned it at my entrance. His eyes were locked onto my every movement. He wanted to watch himself slide into me. I wanted to see every movement and feel every crevice as my swollen walls took him inside.

  So, I inched down slowly, allowing him the full view of my body sitting on top of his.

  “Oh, holy shit,” he breathed.

  I planted my hands onto his rippling chest as I slowly began to roll. His hands flew to my hips, helping me move as his eyes screwed shut. He looked absolutely beautiful with my juices shining on his cheeks. So beautiful, in fact, that I dipped down and locked my lips with his again.

  When he opened his eyes, he was looking at me, and before I could react, he flipped me over onto my back.

  “What was that for?” I asked, giggling.

  “I don’t want to miss a moment with you,” he said.

  Then, he set a furious pace. His cock slid in and out of me, stretching me as my walls expanded to accommodate his massive dick. My juices were covering his dick, dripping down his balls, and my hands clamped down into the muscles of his back. I rolled my hips up to meet his, watching his lips pucker with pleasure as my pussy began fluttering around his cock.

  “Fuck, Melissa. You’re so tight. Holy shit, you feel incredible.”

  His face dropped into the crook of my neck as he snapped his hips against mine. I wrapped my thick legs around his waist, pulling him in closer as our hips connected. Skin slapping skin echoed off the corners of his room, the smell of our sex permeating the air as we gasped and moaned into one another’s skin. His body was shining with sweat, and my skin was quivering against his. My pussy pulled his cock farther and farther into me, making his hips stutter as I quickly climbed that precipice again.

  I wanted him to fall over with me. I wanted to cling to his body as we whispered each other’s names out into the night.

  “Come with me, Brandon. Please,” I whispered.

  His lips locked with mine again as he began hammering my hips. My tits jumped at his chest as my fingertips raked down his back. My moans became whimpers which morphed into wails, and soon there was nothing but the sound of my own blood rushing through my ears.

  “I’m almost there. Almost there. Come for me, Melissa. Squeeze that cock.”

  I clung to him, my head dipping into the crook of his neck as my teeth sank into the meat of his shoulder. He groaned into me, his cock sliding deep into my pussy before I felt him twitch. My entire body quaked for him, shaking and convulsing as we dropped to the bed. His lips peppered my cheek with kisses as my pussy milked his dick, swallowing his come down as he marked me as his own.

  Just like he had so many years ago.

  We laid there in the moonlight, naked and panting. I could feel his juices trickling between my legs as he laid there, his dick still sheathed within me. I could feel him panting while his entire body shook, but when he tried to move, I only pulled him closer. Deeper. Farther into my body.

  “I’m right here, Melissa. I’m not going anywhere,” he whispered into my ear.

  I fell asleep that night in his bed before I even felt him pull his cock from between my legs.

  Chapter 19

  Brandon

  I woke up the next morning with Melissa’s hair sprawled across my chest. My fingertips danced along her skin, feeling how warm she was as she snuggled into me. The sunlight was streaming across her exotic skin, coating her in a shimmering light that pulled a smile from my cheeks. She looked like a sleeping angel as her chest rose and fell with her soft snores. I wondered if she was sleeping better in my arms like I was within hers.

  I played with her hair and traced pictures on her back until she stirred. She groaned and stretched,
her leg pulling taut between mine. Her lips reached out and pressed a kiss to my stomach, causing me to chuckle as she flickered her sleepy gaze up to mine.

  Even in their hazy state, the yellow freckles of her brown eyes shone with the rays of the sun.

  “I have to go get Sarah,” she said.

  “I was going to wake you soon if you didn’t stir. I’ll have to get up and get Max soon, too.”

  “With your mom?” she asked as she sat up.

  “Yep. With your in-laws?” I asked.