The Idiot

by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

that he didn’t exist? Explain yourself,” herepeated, angrily.

  “Because he _didn’t_ exist--never could and never did--there! You’d betterdrop the subject, I warn you!”

  “And this is my son--my own son--whom I--oh, gracious Heaven!Eropegoff--Eroshka Eropegoff didn’t exist!”

  “Ha, ha! it’s Eroshka now,” laughed Hippolyte.

  “No, sir, Kapitoshka--not Eroshka. I mean, Kapiton Alexeyevitch--retiredmajor--married Maria Petrovna Lu--Lu--he was my friend andcompanion--Lutugoff--from our earliest beginnings. I closed his eyes forhim--he was killed. Kapiton Eropegoff never existed! tfu!”

  The general shouted in his fury; but it was to be concluded that hiswrath was not kindled by the expressed doubt as to Kapiton’s existence.This was his scapegoat; but his excitement was caused by something quitedifferent. As a rule he would have merely shouted down the doubt asto Kapiton, told a long yarn about his friend, and eventually retiredupstairs to his room. But today, in the strange uncertainty of humannature, it seemed to require but so small an offence as this to makehis cup to overflow. The old man grew purple in the face, he raised hishands. “Enough of this!” he yelled. “My curse--away, out of the houseI go! Colia, bring my bag away!” He left the room hastily and in aparoxysm of rage.

  His wife, Colia, and Ptitsin ran out after him.

  “What have you done now?” said Varia to Gania. “He’ll probably be makingoff _there_ again! What a disgrace it all is!”

  “Well, he shouldn’t steal,” cried Gania, panting with fury. And just atthis moment his eye met Hippolyte’s.

  “As for you, sir,” he cried, “you should at least remember that you arein a strange house and--receiving hospitality; you should not take theopportunity of tormenting an old man, sir, who is too evidently out ofhis mind.”

  Hippolyte looked furious, but he restrained himself.

  “I don’t quite agree with you that your father is out of his mind,” heobserved, quietly. “On the contrary, I cannot help thinking he has beenless demented of late. Don’t you think so? He has grown so cunning andcareful, and weighs his words so deliberately; he spoke to me about thatKapiton fellow with an object, you know! Just fancy--he wanted me to--”

  “Oh, devil take what he wanted you to do! Don’t try to be too cunningwith me, young man!” shouted Gania. “If you are aware of the real reasonfor my father’s present condition (and you have kept such an excellentspying watch during these last few days that you are sure to be aware ofit)--you had no right whatever to torment the--unfortunate man, and toworry my mother by your exaggerations of the affair; because the wholebusiness is nonsense--simply a drunken freak, and nothing more, quiteunproved by any evidence, and I don’t believe that much of it!” (hesnapped his fingers). “But you must needs spy and watch over us all,because you are a--a--”

  “Screw!” laughed Hippolyte.

  “Because you are a humbug, sir; and thought fit to worry people for halfan hour, and tried to frighten them into believing that you would shootyourself with your little empty pistol, pirouetting about and playing atsuicide! I gave you hospitality, you have fattened on it, your cough hasleft you, and you repay all this--”

  “Excuse me--two words! I am Varvara Ardalionovna’s guest, not yours;_you_ have extended no hospitality to me. On the contrary, if I amnot mistaken, I believe you are yourself indebted to Mr. Ptitsin’shospitality. Four days ago I begged my mother to come down here and findlodgings, because I certainly do feel better here, though I am not fat,nor have I ceased to cough. I am today informed that my room is readyfor me; therefore, having thanked your sister and mother for theirkindness to me, I intend to leave the house this evening. I beg yourpardon--I interrupted you--I think you were about to add something?”

  “Oh--if that is the state of affairs--” began Gania.

  “Excuse me--I will take a seat,” interrupted Hippolyte once more,sitting down deliberately; “for I am not strong yet. Now then, I amready to hear you. Especially as this is the last chance we shall haveof a talk, and very likely the last meeting we shall ever have at all.”

  Gania felt a little guilty.

  “I assure you I did not mean to reckon up debits and credits,” he began,“and if you--”

  “I don’t understand your condescension,” said Hippolyte. “As for me, Ipromised myself, on the first day of my arrival in this house, thatI would have the satisfaction of settling accounts with you in a verythorough manner before I said good-bye to you. I intend to perform thisoperation now, if you like; after you, though, of course.”

  “May I ask you to be so good as to leave this room?”

  “You’d better speak out. You’ll be sorry afterwards if you don’t.”

  “Hippolyte, stop, please! It’s so dreadfully undignified,” said Varia.

  “Well, only for the sake of a lady,” said Hippolyte, laughing. “Iam ready to put off the reckoning, but only put it off, VarvaraArdalionovna, because an explanation between your brother and myself hasbecome an absolute necessity, and I could not think of leaving the housewithout clearing up all misunderstandings first.”

  “In a word, you are a wretched little scandal-monger,” cried Gania, “andyou cannot go away without a scandal!”

  “You see,” said Hippolyte, coolly, “you can’t restrain yourself. You’llbe dreadfully sorry afterwards if you don’t speak out now. Come, youshall have the first say. I’ll wait.”

  Gania was silent and merely looked contemptuously at him.

  “You won’t? Very well. I shall be as short as possible, for my part. Twoor three times to-day I have had the word ‘hospitality’ pushed down mythroat; this is not fair. In inviting me here you yourself entrappedme for your own use; you thought I wished to revenge myself upon theprince. You heard that Aglaya Ivanovna had been kind to me and read myconfession. Making sure that I should give myself up to your interests,you hoped that you might get some assistance out of me. I will not gointo details. I don’t ask either admission or confirmation of this fromyourself; I am quite content to leave you to your conscience, and tofeel that we understand one another capitally.”

  “What a history you are weaving out of the most ordinary circumstances!” cried Varia.

  “I told you the fellow was nothing but a scandal-monger,” said Gania.

  “Excuse me, Varia Ardalionovna, I will proceed. I can, of course,neither love nor respect the prince, though he is a good-hearted fellow,if a little queer. But there is no need whatever for me to hate him. Iquite understood your brother when he first offered me aid against theprince, though I did not show it; I knew well that your brother wasmaking a ridiculous mistake in me. I am ready to spare him, however,even now; but solely out of respect for yourself, Varvara Ardalionovna.

  “Having now shown you that I am not quite such a fool as I look, andthat I have to be fished for with a rod and line for a good long whilebefore I am caught, I will proceed to explain why I specially wished tomake your brother look a fool. That my motive power is hate, I do notattempt to conceal. I have felt that before dying (and I am dying,however much fatter I may appear to you), I must absolutely make a foolof, at least, one of that class of men which has dogged me all my life,which I hate so cordially, and which is so prominently represented byyour much esteemed brother. I should not enjoy paradise nearly so muchwithout having done this first. I hate you, Gavrila Ardalionovitch,solely (this may seem curious to you, but I repeat)--solely because youare the type, and incarnation, and head, and crown of the most impudent,the most self-satisfied, the most vulgar and detestable form ofcommonplaceness. You are ordinary of the ordinary; you have no chance ofever fathering the pettiest idea of your own. And yet you are as jealousand conceited as you can possibly be; you consider yourself a greatgenius; of this you are persuaded, although there are dark moments ofdoubt and rage, when even this fact seems uncertain. There are spotsof darkness on your horizon, though they will disappear when you becomecompletely stupid. But a long and chequered path lies before you, andof this I am glad. In the fir
st place you will never gain a certainperson.”

  “Come, come! This is intolerable! You had better stop, you littlemischief-making wretch!” cried Varia. Gania had grown very pale; hetrembled, but said nothing.

  Hippolyte paused, and looked at him intently and with greatgratification. He then turned his gaze upon Varia, bowed, and went out,without adding another word.

  Gania might justly complain of the hardness with which fate treated him.Varia dared not speak to him for a long while, as he strode past her,backwards and forwards. At last he went and stood at the window, lookingout, with his back turned towards her. There was a fearful row going onupstairs again.

  “Are you off?” said Gania, suddenly, remarking that she had risen andwas about to leave the room. “Wait a moment--look at this.”

  He approached the table and laid a small sheet of paper before her. Itlooked like a little note.

  “Good heavens!” cried Varia, raising her hands.

  This was the note:

  “GAVRILA ARDOLIONOVITCH,--persuaded of your kindness of heart, I havedetermined to ask your advice on a